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Zoby Two 4 years, 6 months ago.
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Yeah, it’s bleak at first because the fairy tale life we have been taught to want- doesn’t exist. We all want the unicorn woman that loves us unconditionally forever, carries her own weight, never nags you, stays fit for you, etc… but does that sound at all like what you have now? Do you really see finding a woman like that who isn’t already with a much wealthier guy? (And sucking his resources dry)
I’m saying your opinions on what makes up a fulfilling life are all that has to shift and you will be happier than any married man who has ever existed.
I’m the happiest I’ve ever been because I spend my money/time the way that I want. I enjoy the time I spend with myself and if I get a pang for human contact I just go out and find it… no more nagging, no more begging for sex, no more having to “man up” for someone else’s benefit.
The hard part is swallowing the first pill.
"Compare your lives to mine and then kill yourselves" -BBR
A short version of Esther Vilar’s book The Manipulated Man is available as a free download. Here is one of the sites it is on: http://commons.wikimannia.org/images/Esther-Vilar_The-Manipulated-Man.pdf Here is a quote from the book: “Only woman can break the vicious circle of man’s manipulation and exploitation – but she will not do it. There is absolutely no compelling reason why she should. It is useless to appeal to her feelings, for she is callous and knows no pity. And so the world will go on, sinking deeper and deeper into this morass of kitsch, barbarism, and inanity called femininity. And man, that wonderful dreamer, will never awaken from his dream.” If you think you are the exception, then wake up and stop dreaming. Wake up before it’s too late.
Holy s~~~. I find it amazing that a woman was able to write something that insightful. I presume because she’s from Buenos Aires and didn’t grow up with the typical North American cultural values.
Insightful, but depressing. Damn. Paints a bleak picture really, you’re either Forever Alone, a player who strings women along, or stuck in a miserable slave marriage…
Yeah, it’s bleak at first because the fairy tale life we have been taught to want- doesn’t exist. We all want the unicorn woman that loves us unconditionally forever, carries her own weight, never nags you, stays fit for you, etc… but does that sound at all like what you have now? Do you really see finding a woman like that who isn’t already with a much wealthier guy? (And sucking his resources dry) I’m saying your opinions on what makes up a fulfilling life are all that has to shift and you will be happier than any married man who has ever existed. I’m the happiest I’ve ever been because I spend my money/time the way that I want. I enjoy the time I spend with myself and if I get a pang for human contact I just go out and find it… no more nagging, no more begging for sex, no more having to “man up” for someone else’s benefit. The hard part is swallowing the first pill.
Ugh admittedly I’m not there yet, however thoughts of the relationship coming to an end have been swirling around in my head for a month or so now. I see myself on 2 paths, one is uncertain. The other is marriage and kids, which admittedly right now does not hold a lot of appeal.
If you don’t mind my asking, do you have meaningful long-term sexual relathionships with women, or is it all one night stands?
Spend enough time with any woman, and eventually they all start pushing for you to put a ring on it. I think most men aren’t aware there is an alternative.
I know one guy who’se been a holdout and refuses to marry his partner, other than myself. Everyone else has caved. They have 2 kids, been at it 10 years. He’s high earning oil and gas guy, but is away a lot, misses a lot of time with the wifey and kids. She complains about this, but is happy to spend his money. I hear the hens talk amongst themselves, the matriarch hen is like “I got J. a lawyer because she should get what she’s due after 10 years supporting her man.” What the…Last I checked he was busting his ass in the field to support them.
One thing that stands out to me is that our Canuck brother keeps stating: “She’s generally a nice person.” And, “She’s not a bad person.” She’s using you for the financial & emotional security that you bring to the table. It also sounds to me that she doesn’t want to live alone; that she’s not happy with her own self. A child will just reinforce that attitude, and you will be responsible for that child the rest of your life. Not to mention that you will be forever intertwined with your girlfriend…..whether you want to or not. The judge will make sure of that. Look, your girlfriend needs to live alone….BY HERSELF…..so she can learn to be happy by HERSELF.
Well…yeah. Early on we had a steamy relationship and I was probably thinking with my dick more than my head. We moved in pretty quickly after dating for about 1 year. Things were still good for about 9 months until the subsequent pregnancy then miscarriage.
She is a really nice girl, but she’s always been wishy washy about life, whereas I’m like, “I’m going to do this.” I think had we waited to move in together I might have clued in more. She isn’t very happy, and I don’t know what to do to make her happy, as I said, in her mind kids will equal happiness.
Don’t know if I mentioned, she’s also on her phone…a lot. I ask what she’s doing and it’s always “nothing”. Looks like FB to me, but pinterest and other s~~~. Could be nothing, but the thought did occur to me that she may be talking to other guys. I’d like to think she’s not the cheating type but you never know, I’d like to think she wouldn’t given her mom cheated on her dad and it f~~~ing wrecked her family with a bad divorce.
Let’s say I determine I want to push the eject button on the relationship after having a discussion with her. How does one ensure they get their house deposit back + all their posessions that they had before the relationship? I wouldn’t even know where to begin.
Look back at your first post, what advice would you give to a friend that posted that instead of yourself.
If there were anymore red flags it could be confused for an invasion by China.
Do you like the relationship or you like your memory of what the relationship used to be. Even the PUA guys would advise you that this relationship is over.
The hard truth is that it will never go back to what it was, that is gone. If she thinks she feels a threat of you leaving she will fake it to make it look like going back to what it was but only for a little bit and it will just get worse and worse.
Problem is I don’t think she’s a bad person, I think she’s a person with less professional motivation/ambition than what I have who is placing a lot of self-worth value on her ability to have kids.
I’m not going to back you on the first part of that though the second sounds like a great way to use you as a worker slave.
Everyone saying dump her now, it’s not as easy as all that to extract your feelings from a 3 year relationship and say “get the f~~~ outta here.” I’ll be demonized by her family, and mine will wonder WTF you let her go for. (I was a single bachelor for a long ass time).
From the description she has already extracted her feelings from the relationship of that you can be sure. If you can’t get past the need to explain yourself the miscarriage is a great reason to use, just say ever since the miscarriage the relationship became dysfunctional and it feels like the love is gone because of that. You will still need to stick to your guns on that one but miscarriage is a relationship killer and saying it destroyed the love of the relationship puts it in terms that are harder for them to complain about. Just don’t let them try to talk you in to some bulls~~~ counseling
F~~~ is there no relationship happiness anywhere? Seems pretty bleak is all.
Yes well this is the place where you’re going to get the advice to not get married no “lol’s” just the fact of yes it has gotten that bad. It is better to try to find your happiness elsewhere than from a woman because any happiness you find their will be fleeting at best.
Edit: I see you posted while I was typing.
I’d like to think she’s not the cheating type but you never know, I’d like to think she wouldn’t given her mom cheated on her dad and it f~~~ing wrecked her family with a bad divorce.
Sounds like a fast path to it’s not actually your kid
Let’s say I determine I want to push the eject button on the relationship after having a discussion with her. How does one ensure they get their house deposit back + all their posessions that they had before the relationship? I wouldn’t even know where to begin.
That’s getting rough and there are a lot of specifics to that and she may try to make it very harmful to you. Who’s name is the house in for starters? If it’s just in her’s your pretty screwed on that one otherwise it probably comes down to getting bought out of your interest in it or selling it on the market.
Please re-read my earlier post about being in charge of your own happiness. I cannot stress this more. Being in a relatons~~~ is not a panacea for your lack of happiness. It lies within yourself.
You’ve been conditioned to think that being in a domestic partnership completes you as a man. Bulls~~~.
Vacations, partying, and sex have put you in a comfort zone and you’re afraid to leave that comfort zone. I was there. It was forced on me and I FREAKED OUT. Worrying, afraid of being alone, afraid of the unknown, etc. There was one emotion though that scared the hell out of me.
Anger. I woke up p~~~ed off, I went to bed p~~~ed off, and I went through my daily routine…..p~~~ed off. I fantasized about killing my soon to be ex-wife’s bull dike lover. So I checked myself into counseling. Mainly because I’ve never experienced that level of rage before, and I knew if I didn’t control it…..something bad might happen. At the very least, I was going to give myself a heart attack.
The second counseling session woke me up. The shrink told me that if I still loved her, then I should leave the door open.
Are you kidding me? After I explained in great detail what this dike tramp whore did…..I SHOULD LEAVE THE DOOR OPEN?
That’s when I realized that society has ingrained its “norms” in every aspect of our lives. Men can only be happy if there’s a little lady waiting for them at home. And this idea is reinforced EVERYWHERE. I fired my counselor. Not because he didn’t say what I wanted to hear, but because he was also brainwashed by decades of societal bombardment of “what should be.”
I’ve already experienced the stereotypical finger pointing as a freshly divorced 51 year old man: “He’s a player. He’s a drunk. He’s just not ready to settle down yet.” Call me anything you want, I don’t care.
I call me “Happy.”
Whore Magnet
“If you don’t mind my asking, do you have meaningful long-term sexual relathionships with women, or is it all one night stands?”
Thankfully those aren’t the only two choices and right now for me it’s neither.
The drive is still there (just turned 30) but I’d rather just jerk off and spend ALL that extra time and money on doing stuff I want.
Since MGTOW, I’ve gotten out of debt, rebuilt a ’69 Porsche 912, lost 25 lbs, picked up watercolor painting, shooting, and am learning the banjo. All stuff I WANT to do… I’m not sharing any that with some unappreciative woman.
You are only here for you, and only for an extremely limited time.
"Compare your lives to mine and then kill yourselves" -BBR
“If you don’t mind my asking, do you have meaningful long-term sexual relathionships with women, or is it all one night stands?” Thankfully those aren’t the only two choices and right now for me it’s neither. The drive is still there (just turned 30) but I’d rather just jerk off and spend ALL that extra time and money on doing stuff I want. Since MGTOW, I’ve gotten out of debt, rebuilt a ’69 Porsche 912, lost 25 lbs, picked up watercolor painting, shooting, and am learning the banjo. All stuff I WANT to do… I’m not sharing any that with some unappreciative woman. You are only here for you, and only for an extremely limited time.
Good on you. I’ll admit when I was single, I just drank a lot more and played videogames. Was working too much and was burned out. I should have been doing more with my education and hobbies.
Do you think you ever want to have kids, or is it impossible given the current state of affairs with women and marriage?
Think we all go through different stages.your probably thinking you dont want to be on your own.but its going to get alot worse.i love my kids and see them alot but it makes it alot more complicated.you think shes bad now but wait til you have kids together.she will have more power than she has now.being single isnt a bad thing,i went through a stage of pumping and dumping a while back but ive got to the stage where i cant be bothered anymore.theres so much a man can do in this world,dont let a woman hold you back.
Sadly as a man… you really cannot “have” kids. She has them in every sense of the word, and when she has kids, she has you too. Another bitter pill.
No I don’t see making a kid in my the future. Did I want them once upon a time? You bet your ass I did.
"Compare your lives to mine and then kill yourselves" -BBR
Think we all go through different stages.your probably thinking you dont want to be on your own.but its going to get alot worse.i love my kids and see them alot but it makes it alot more complicated.you think shes bad now but wait til you have kids together.she will have more power than she has now.being single isnt a bad thing,i went through a stage of pumping and dumping a while back but ive got to the stage where i cant be bothered anymore.theres so much a man can do in this world,dont let a woman hold you back.
Women would have us believe they help us progress forward as men and become better people…I’ve yet to see evidence of that. Even in my own family, parents have been married 30+ years. My Dad drinks too much and my Mom keeps him in check. I did have the thought “maybe he wouldn’t drink so much if you didn’t call him an idiot and nag him about every little f~~~ing thing”…She seems happy. He’s just going through the motions. I talk about relationship stuff with him and he just kind of smiles knowingly, like “oh they all start out really nice son, later they become verbally agressive. But your mother is a good woman though…” He keeps saying that like it’s a mantra and he’ll believe it. This is a glimpse into your potential future post-children as an empty nester? Beaten down, verbally abused, no longer wanting to fight the constant nagging. I never see them hug or kiss or anything like that anymore. He’s winding down in life, admittedly, so brings less value to the relationship apparently. I guess you don’t get any credit for being a high earner and providing a great standard of living for your wife for 30+ years. Sad really.
Of all the couples I know who are married, I know 2 couples who are happy. One is recently married (less than 1 year) plus, surprise surprise she’s desperate to have a kid so he still gets to have lots of sex. The other couple has made a concious decison to never have kids. Also the guy is dominant in the relationship, she’s a very sweet, shy and pretty passive wife, which is rare. They seem to be happy.
Sadly as a man… you really cannot “have” kids. She has them in every sense of the word, and when she has kids, she has you too. Another bitter pill. No I don’t see making a kid in my the future. Did I want them once upon a time? You bet your ass I did.
You’re right on there. A friend who is now divorced had to take his kids out of the home because his wife was actually mentally unstable and was a danger to herself and the kids. Yet he still wasn’t able to secure full custody. He still does not have legal full custody to this day (the kids are mid teens, he’s at least 5 years separated now) even though he is their legal guardian! They see their mother once a year, and she lives in Nunavut or some s~~~, and is a total nutbag, and even her parents are ready to have her committed.
During the divorce she was trying to say he was the one who was mentally unstable and they had to pay for extensive testing to prove otherwise. When it didn’t come up in her favour, she disregarded the results.
Just shows you how rigged the system actually is against fathers.
My Girlfriend’s poison is Netflix. She’ll binge that s~~~ for hours. Meanwhile I play video games, I’m not paying attention to her, go figure! She will cook but I BBQ so that’s a wash. Housework only gets done when people are coming over because she doesn’t want people to see how messy the house is. Vacuming is my full time job at home with 3 pets apparently. I think she will not carry her own weight if we have kids if I’m to be 100% honest. I’m sure I would end up sacrificing way more than her. She doesn’t have the ambition to better her job and put money away NOW before kids are here, how much is she going to have with kids and we’re both tired as f~~~? This is probably the #1 reason we’re not married yet, lack of ambition on her part is giving me pause. Problem is I don’t think she’s a bad person, I think she’s a person with less professional motivation/ambition than what I have who is placing a lot of self-worth value on her ability to have kids. Everyone saying dump her now, it’s not as easy as all that to extract your feelings from a 3 year relationship and say “get the f~~~ outta here.” I’ll be demonized by her family, and mine will wonder WTF you let her go for. (I was a single bachelor for a long ass time).
I really think that you’ve answered all of your own queries, with your own statements. I think that you know the future issues which are suspect to you, and might be seeking validation for, are already true.
You may still be at the point where you think that your feelings, such as “I don’t think she’s a bad person, I think she’s a person with less professional motivation/ambition than what I have who is placing a lot of self-worth value on her ability to have kids.” actually matter to her in any way shape or form. I think that you’ll learn that your feelings are only important to her when they mirror exactly what hers happen to be, and if they don’t? Let the storm begin.
Ask yourself this: If I were to sit down with her as an adult, and ask her the very questions which I’m posing here, but in a manner that isn’t confrontational, what would her answer be?
Yeah right. I suggested she start exploring career options or school to get a better job so that we could earn more to take care of kids in the future. You know what I got? Tears galore, and told I’m an asshole who thinks of kids like they’re a numbers game. Basically she all but said, once I get pregnant and have a kid buddy, you’re taking care of us, because I’m done with my s~~~ty job. Great.
She’s answered your question, before you’ve even asked it, and in splendid, adult form. You’ve presented to her things which are of great concern to the both of you. Upon being shown your feelings, her answer to you is to cry, call you an asshole, and present to you in no uncertain terms: what YOUR future is going to be, whether you like it or not. Now how much would you imagine she cares about your feelings? She has taken a crisis of her own, and defined YOU by it. Welcome to marriage, my friend, and the logic that is woman. You no longer exist, except in the form of a magical bag of money. And if you feel invalidated NOW, just wait until a kid is in the picture. You are presently and officially at the bottom of the Totem Pole, or so you would think. No sir. She can actually dig a f~~~ing hole at the bottom of the totem pole, toss you into it and make you lower, by having a child. You will be less than even mattering. You will have gone from Sweetheart, to a Subhuman almost overnight. With your marriage to her, you can expect at least one, but probably two things from her. Utter, legal, court and law-enforced disregard for your well-being, and a contract which stipulates that you spend an absolute minimum of 18 years in indentured servitude to her, and to your child. Other than being a tree which grows money for her to pick, you will be nothing. Would you really choose to be Nothing? Of your own volition? And monetarilly, emotionally, spiritually and psychologically PICK UP THE TAB for the right to be nothing?
She’s proven to you that being ambitious, motivated or independent in any sense are not values in her life. She’s clearly pointed out to you in one way or another that her role in this relationship is to have a “child”, then sit around with it for the next two decades while you actually do the work and pay for her “Choice”?
This person is essentially trying to get YOU to agree to a contract where she needs to do nothing more in life than receive things from you and your child. Being a “bad person” is something which you’ve assigned importance to. Is she a bad person?
Now, quickly remove the construct of romance, “sex” or her precious “kitty” from this equation. Pretend that everything I’ve just said is actually a good and true male friend asking you to do all of this.
I think that your first reaction might be “HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA Fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck you.”
Because we all know that a good friend, or even a bad friend, let alone someone who is a “good person” would NEVER ask you for anything like this.
It’s not really a question of whether or not she’s a “bad person”. I think the real question is, “Am I a good enough person that I’d save me?”. Because I think you know in your heart that were push to come to shove? She wouldn’t.
Hell man, if you’re going to pay your life savings to someone to murder you in every way except physically, just hire me. If you get married, I’ll gladly beat the s~~~ out of you, and for only half-price.
@CanadianSportsFan
Clint just brought this to the forums today and I thought of you.
Which really solidifies this one – from a man married 4 times:
“Married Men are like Beaten Dogs. The Frog Soup Analogy”
••••
Here’s the thread as an option.
/forums/topic/man-finds-out-his-wife-has-been-cheating-for-10-years/
If you keep doing what you've always done... you're gonna keep getting what you always got.Marriage hah… don’t do it…
Regardless of your situation (which is pretty bad but not unheard of) here are the legal reasons to not get married
from this thread /forums/topic/list-of-things-all-men-should-know-about-the-law-regarding-womenchildren/
Hi I am new here and will proceed directly to introduction after this post.
This is a list that I want everyone to add to. I just read “Advice for Men About the American Woman – Bradley Moore – Google Books” a few weeks ago and it was pretty enlightening about how the laws in America have been increasingly slanted for women to take advantage of men. Here are a few things I learned from the book, and much of it I didn’t know. I am not going to list exact laws when in reality all that matter is the practical and pragmatic application of them.
1) If a man has consensual sex with a woman, he has legally agreed (practically speaking) to have a child and to support it for 18 to 21 years (depending on jurisdiction.) The only ways to combat this is to not make your sperm available (vasectomy, flush your used condom… trash can is not enough particularly if you are wealthy etc.) DO NOT trust a woman is on birth control or that she will consult you about getting pregnant. In general, her friends opinions are more important than yours about childbearing.
2) NEVER EVER EVER acknowledge in a court that you are a child’s father for any reason without certain proof such as a paternity test, unless you don’t mind being on the hook for 18-21 years of child support. If you admit paternity in court by just saying a simple “Yes” to the wrong question, you WILL BE held liable for support even if a paternity test later shows that you are not the biological father. and even if the biological father becomes known (and according to a PA case, even if the woman goes back to the biological father with the child. TRUE STORY.)
3) A woman can claim that you have a father relationship with her child if you have lived together over 3 years (depends on jurisdiction) and get child support.
4) Child support is roughly 1/3 of your income BEFORE taxes for ONE child, closer to 50% PRETAX for 2. Men having multiple children to multiple women have been know to be court ordered to pay OVER 100% of what they make, which is impossible. There is a little used law in a few jurisdictions that men reserve the right to keep an amount related to a calculation based on the poverty level, but your lawyer has to be on top of that.
5) In some states (like NY,) you may be subject for LIFETIME alimony if you marry a woman, regardless of children. Of course the longer the marriage the higher the chances of this happening, but you could end up in front of a feminist judge.
6) Women have the right to determine everything about offspring, independent of your choice or supposed rights. They can choose to abort, abandon at a hospital, or raise a child on your dime. Many know the loopholes to keep you from seeing the child if that’s what they want (abusive, drug user etc.) They also do not have to spend any of your child support on the child, and have to show no proof or accountability to anyone about how they use child support. Women are grossly assumed to always have the child’s interest at heart. The only way around this is to get custody, and that is difficult unless the woman has a prior documented history of drug abuse, mental health issues or some other very serious problem.
7) Any money, gifts, food, stuff for school etc bought for the child out of your pocket is considered a gift freely given and does not count toward child support. Only what is paid to the state and then disbursed to the woman is considered child support except in certain narrow cases (a medical bill is paid directly by you, but be careful because as before, it is by jurisdiction.)
8) Prenuptial agreements are not full proof. Women can have them thrown out and then take half plus alimony plus child support.
9) If a woman up and decides to quit her job to become a housewife without consulting you, if may be time to leave her immediately. Once she has established herself as a longtime housewife, you will be on the hook to support her financially to keep whatever lifestyle she has adopted, if she decides to leave you.
10) Women have some protection to their private property that men do not have. The law is stated in the book. Not sure if it was federal but it was clearly protective of women’s property and not men’s. As men your property will be divvied up if things go south, or if the woman just wants out on a whim.
11) Before you are married, most of the laws regarding property and money put you on equal footing with women (unless you have children together.) After marriage, the power clearly goes to the women. A clear majority of divorces are initiated by women, and why not? It favors them financially and in just about every other way. Men who marry women give up a lot of power and any chance of equality in the courts.
12) Men can be accused of crimes such as domestic violence, assault, rape etc and be put in jail until it is sorted out (even if the woman abuses the man and the man is the one who called 911.) In most cases there are no criminal laws that will allow for the man to have the woman prosecuted if she lies (though civil court is an expensive option.) In the rare instance that your jurisdiction has a law to this effect, often the district attorney will elect not to pursue in the interest of “not discouraging real FEMALE victims form coming forward.” Note the hypocrisy as the men are the victims here.
13) Women can consent to sex, then change their mind if they don’t like you or how they are treated after, and claim rape. Not that they will be successful, but even if they are not, and they lied, their is mostly no consequence for them.
14) In many jurisdictions, if you move out of your shared living space from your wife, it is automatic grounds for divorce. If you set up a tent or sleep on the couch and take pictures, it looks much better in court for you.
15) In many jurisdictions if you decide to share your domicile with a female, you cannot just kick her out, even if she is not on the lease, doesn’t pay for anything etc. In many cases you need a court hearing. Not so the other way around. If she gets a restraining order and the place has her name on it, you are gone buddy!
This is most of the points.
My takeaways…
1) DO NOT GET MARRIED UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES
2) Know your local laws especially regarding the kangaroo court they call family court.
3) Do not let any woman have direct access to your sperm
4) Know that you are agreeing to father children (at least financially) if you have unprotected sex.
5) For those of you who want children (like me) think very hard about the real costs ($200k or more not including college)
6) and ESPECIALLY consider and know the woman that you want to have kids with. Its very easy for them to take you to the cleaners and not be held accountable.
7) Women want men to remain ignorant and not know these laws (or the application of them) until after you have been trapped. This i believe is exactly related to what MGTOW is combating.
and now about your situation. Since when did women suddenly figure out what will make them happy.
You surely won’t (make her happy.)
She thinks she wants a baby because that baby will automatically unconditionally want and need her (which is true for a while, and could be true longer through manipulation.)
She is trying to manipulate you into marriage and kids. If she loved you, she wouldn’t offer ultimatums.
She doesn’t love you. She loves what you can offer her (see last post.) If this wasn’t true then why did she say, “if there is no kid then their is no us?”
She expects you marrying her and having a kid to make her happy. While it may temporarily make her feel better, it is not the solution. When it fails to make her happy, you are the one who volunteered to be on the hook NO MATTER WHAT.
Don’t get married to her. Don’t have kids (NOT WITH HER ANYWAYS.)
You can still love her, as friends, but I would not get into a marriage contract with this woman!
RUN RUN RUN!!!!
i want to see the other post… not to troll but to read it. please?
Do as you please. You’ve been warned. You can check Marriage forums I believe, for more.
She is trying to manipulate you into marriage and kids. If she loved you, she wouldn’t offer ultimatums. She doesn’t love you. She loves what you can offer her (see last post.) If this wasn’t true then why did she say, “if there is no kid then their is no us?” She expects you marrying her and having a kid to make her happy. While it may temporarily make her feel better, it is not the solution. When it fails to make her happy, you are the one who volunteered to be on the hook NO MATTER WHAT. Don’t get married to her. Don’t have kids (NOT WITH HER ANYWAYS.)
So true.
This is what happened to my friend, 1 year ago and he is f~~~ed. He wouldn’t be, If he didn’t made dumb decisions and would think with his upper head. I posted about it here already.
After pregnancy and marriage, His “awesome” wife became fat, is not working. My friend is slaving for her and giving his money. Awesome.
She intentionally became pregnant (stopped using anti-pregnancy pills (and didn’t tell) and lied about her period) then USED a kid to make him marry her.
Isn’t it wonderful !
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Look, your girlfriend needs to live alone….BY HERSELF…..so she can learn to be happy by HERSELF.
SO MUCH THIS ^^^^^^
Lemme tell you a little story. And I will not forget this because I KNEW I was right back then. I was already 12 years older than she and she was pouting and sniffling facing AWAY from me in bed. I was telling her “You need to get your own place. You need to get a job. You need to stand up on your own”. She’s crying and thinking Im dumping her. I wasn’t.
I fell for the tears man and I didn’t push. 8 months become 3.5 years. Ended in disaster and a screaming mess.
In retrospect, I should have pushed her out the f~~~ing door. No mercy. And yes Im serious.After the 3.5 years we’re cleaning out my place because Im making a move after accepting an offer.
She says “You didn’t allow me to be independent. I lost myself.”I never spoke to her again. What an unimaginable bitch.
Everyone saying dump her now, it’s not as easy as all that to extract your feelings from a 3 year relationship and say “get the f~~~ outta here.” I’ll be demonized by her family, and mine will wonder WTF you let her go for. (I was a single bachelor for a long ass time).
I know that feeling too. You’re invested. SHE KNOWS THIS. It would be like working on a f~~~ing painting for 3 years and selling it for too cheap or leaving it on a sinking ship. You almost WANT to go down with the ship yourself just to stay with it. It’s EXACTLY like that.
I’ll be demonized by her family
I was. You’ll deal with it. But here’s the catch. You’re gonna be demonized by her family EVEN IF YOU MARRY HER AND HAVE TWO KIDS WITH HER AND SHE DECIDES SHE WANTS THREE.
You’re ALWAYS going to be the asshole. ALWAYS.
and mine will wonder WTF you let her go for.
Mine understands. I let her go, because she didn’t add value to my life. She was a parasite, a headache and a burden. Keeping her around so that your family (or hers) doesn’t think you’re an asshole is the wrong reason. You know what that says? It doesn’t communicate marrying her is a +1 for you. It says NOT marrying her is a -1 for you. Do you really want to do s~~~ just because it places you at ZERO? Do you want to get married and support two kids and give yourself totally to a situation where if you DONT do it, you’re a prick?
NOT MARRYING HER IS NOT THE SAME AS TREATING HER BADLY.
NOT MARRYING HER IS NOT THE SAME AS TREATING HER BADLY.
NOT MARRYING HER IS NOT THE SAME AS TREATING HER BADLY.Remind yourself and everyone of that. You didn’t treat her badly. I didn’t treat mine badly. I treated her TOO WELL. Better than she deserved. It was not recognized as such. After 3.5 years of letting her live with me, paying for everything, cooking the meals because she was useless, and treating her better than she deserved, those 3.5 years are gone and now I’m remembered as an asshole???
F~~~.
THAT.
S~~~.
This was a girl who was such a princess, she had to go away for a gig and tried to rebook the flight so she would “have another day with me”. I told her just go on the f~~~ing flight. She thought that meant I didn’t love her. Again I was the asshole. She spent a whole day p~~~ed off trying to book the flight, on her cell phone during the meals, and bitching and moaning ALL DAY because it didn’t look like it was possible to change it. In front of her parents I said “you’re an unbelievable f~~~ing princess. You make everyone around you MISERABLE and ruin meals and bitch and moan ALL DAY, so you can have an extra day here? I don’t want to be around you for an extra day like this!!!!” She just wanted to drive me crazy.
“What a great advantage a man can have over women if he only knew
the cold and calculating thoughts that are going her mind
while her eyes are brimming with tears”.
– The Manipulated ManYears later, when I read that quote, I fell back in my f~~~ing chair.
If you keep doing what you've always done... you're gonna keep getting what you always got.
Anonymous5You’re not in love with her,,,you’re in love with what she once was, that is, her courting phase, the NAWALT phase.
That NAWALT is gone forever and nothing can ever bring it back. (but it’s what you think of in all your decision making)
You think that you can “fix” her by doing the “right” things to reverse the process. It won’t work.
The person you’re with now, is the person she always was. Ask anyone who ever lived or worked or went to school with her.She became the person you fell in love with instinctively. She was everything you wanted her to be. It worked.
Once she became pregnant, a subliminal biological reaction took over with that ownership and you became a resource which all she’ll ever do is sociopathicly exploit using sex, tears, shame and state force.
I know you believe there’s a chance the pregnancy was accidental. Her whole ploy is based on you believing in that possibility , no matter how remote.
Women who use Oops pregnancies are particularly selfish and ruthless.If she’s a good old fashioned slave owner she’ll consider you a life long partner, and she’ll be careful how she wields the whip.
But make no mistake, she’ll always be exploiting you from here on in, just the same as she was always playing you from the first glance- AuthorPosts
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