Temptation to Relapse.. How to deal with it?

[not my cup of teaSpectator 28]

I doubt there is a guy on this forum that hasn’t at one time or another cried over a breakup. I’m an older guy and have had probably a dozen breakups with women I’ve dated a year or more. None were easy. There is always a recovery time. Taking the red pill doesn’t make pain go away. Maybe give you some insight into where it is coming from. The only way I know of is to set limits on your emotional attachment early on. Also hit the gym followed by mirror talk: “What am I about?” “Where am I going?”. Track your workouts and congratulate yourself. Look at what your self discipline has done for you. You will see it in your body in the mirror. Mediate on that feeling of success until confidence becomes your natural state. Also do things that are physically difficult – sports, rock climbing, backpacking. Hang with guys. Built your body and mind so that next time, the recover time is short. The confidence you are shooting for is that you know you can get what you need when you want it – including sex and money.

[not my cup of teaSpectator 28]

Actually I just gave the gist of a book I wrote “A Man’s Life. How to Build Power and Confidence”. I’d send you a copy but I’m not sure how to message on this site. You can find it on Smashwords. It’s 99 cents so I can track legit downloads.

[OldBillParticipant]

So you’re here to sell your self published book?

Enjoy your stay. It will be short.

Do not date. Do not impregnate. Do not co-habitate. Above all, do not marry. Reclaim and never again surrender your personal sovereignty.

[NerdTunnelerParticipant]

A lot of guys here got hurt and are still in the red pill rage…The shattering of the illusion is so disorienting that we question everything. Any inkling of revisiting the plantation is a trigger so traumatic that most will call tuna for even discussing that option. The pain have been very deep brother so I can understand others who lash back angrily. They are very protective of this sanctuary and would not stand others to desecrate it. So understand the pain of the brothers and give them time to heal. We ultimately want to achieve the point of indifference like KM or Gargamel and other senior MGTOW brothers…
Regarding the temptation, I understand a bit…Im still ib rage mode but subsiding…I think that the freedom offered by MGTOW is so massive, so disorienting like looking at the ocean for the first time that we begin to lose ourselves and run back to where it is “safe and predictable”..The freedom has so many variables that computing the parameters for each outcome is overwhelming…We got overwhelmed when we see that freedom again. We got enslaved for so long we dont know what to do when that freedom is there. That is the cliff. As MGTOW, we pushed ahead and dive headlong into that cold murky waters…Others will be so terrified of the ocean that they are content to just watch it from afar…You have to decide to push forward as Macho said…Push through that fear and make your life worth living. Others just existed. Post your progress here to give inspiration to fellow brothers who are like abused dogs. We are cowering in pain, expecting that the next hand to lay on us will inflict more pain. It will take time for us to recover and regain the old instinct of the powerful wolf…That is why this site is a sanctuary for us and are very very protective of it….It gave us back our lives…
We need the guidance and experience of senior members to let us see and come to the point of indifference towards women. Where I as a man can live as a Man without fear, hatred or malice towards anyone….I would want to live, not ,merely exist….

I stand with feet apart and let my balls hang free...Manginas dont have balls...See how they stand and sit at the whim of their masters...

[not my cup of teaSpectator 28]

No 99 cents is the easiest way to get it and me to track it. Find a way to get me your email address or tell me where to upload and it’s yours. I can change the price to free for a day or two and you can upload it. But ask.

[not my cup of teaSpectator 28]

I just remembered that smashwords has a coupon option. Enter PJ68K and there is no charge. It never expires.

[surfdude12Participant 4103]

Gone Ghost wrote:

even bad relationships at some stage had good elements, and it is very easy for the mind to selectively focus on those when coupled with societal pressures and relapse into seeking relationships which are harmful in the long run.

Solution: make list of all the BAD ELEMENTS of your last relationship and keep it in your wallet. When tempted to relapse, look at it:

-Paying for all her bulls~~~ jewelry
-Listening to her whine and bitch
-Listening to her whine about you not marrying her
-Her trying to make you responsible for her thoughts: “But you’re not addressing my FEELINGS!!!”
-Her wants you to buy her STUPID EXPENSIVE S~~~ – shoes, jewelry, blah blah
-Etc

[AstroParticipant 2045]

I’m a newer member but this is a topic I have thought about, not because I want to go back but because I DON”T want to go back. If you want to avoid a relapse, you are staring at your answer right now. This website has done much for me. I also ordered the documentary “The Red Pill” plus a couple of books from Amazon. I don’t claim to know it all and I f~~~ up regularly here but I believe the more active one is with MGTOW, the stronger one is. In fact, I have been accused of being an attention whore. Well if that is what it takes to keep from going back, so be it. I can’t go back, I don’t think I could survive another s~~~ty relationship. Remember what brought you here in the first place.

[DanceMyOwnWayParticipant 2097]

Read up on the prevalence of dating Cluster B Personality types. Of the last four women I chose to get involved with – two were NPD and one was a sociopath. These women will happily cheat, lie and otherwise ruin your life and peace of mind. Once you take the red pill there is NO going back my friend. Avoid slavery and live free.

If you fall down 7 times, get up 8

[CatsPawParticipant 423]

You are looking at this the wrong way.
You “think” you want that volatility, that unpredictable, etc.

Quick question: is that ONLY related to women or is that related to everything:

-Are you suddenly looking for gambling your money away in a casino?
-Are you looking for dangerous sports you may try?
-Are you looking for a serious illness perhaps?
-Are you interested in breaking your arm to let it heal overtime?

Stupid questions right? because they dont involve a female.
Now, change the question so that it includes a female with the possible damage happening again, and somehow it feels like there might be a reason to try it, aint it?

You know why that is? Your relapse is not emotional, its sexual. (not in SEX only, everything around the sexuality your subconscious brain desires).

Most people think about their subconscious as just a few instincts and basic motor functions in your body, right?
Well somehow that thing managed to control the entire human species to evolve and not die out. Its much smarter than you think, and it has its own agenda.

-That red flag you let slide when you met that hot girl, you think that is you making that decision?
-That time you fell for a girl crying even thou you knew she didn’t have the right to do it, you think you made that decision?

If you have problems with relapse its because your subconsciousness is starting to panic and throw out the heavy ammunition at you.
Is there a way to beat it? No. Its part of you. If you cannot accept it and control it, you will give up at some point.

I am not sure I am even winning the battle myself (9 years single), but at least I know when that moment comes when I start loosing (for example when I ask a girl on a date) that I am f~~~ing things up, and that keeps me more on my guard to filter the most common whores. I wont get it perfectly but it might be good enough.

A secondary option is to behave like you would with a friend, and dont look like you are a potential long term partner (be childish, play computer games, DONT tell her if you have savings, car, home, etc).
That way she will have some fun with you but will try to avoid staying with you.
This secondary option is not fool proof btw, so I would advice against it.

[Author]

Posts