P~~~ed Off Chicks

[AncientwisdomParticipant 6089]

I was going to entitle this post “Am I an Asshole?”, but sober minds prevailed. The following is something I’ve recently noticed and come to the conclusion of, and would appreciate honest input.

I go out a lot. I’m also an insufferable smart-ass; but I LOVE other’s who share an affinity for the same sense of ball-busting, unconventional, un-cookie-cutter-people,f~~~-off ‘n f~~~-all sense of humor. Anywhoo, recently I was thinking – “man, I p~~~ off a lot of people!”. Then I realized, it’s essentially only female bartenders/waitresses or females in general that get so p~~~y towards me. Perhaps I’m wrong but I think the female (sub) species can’t handle wit and sarcasm for a myriad of reasons, one of which being that it pulls the pedestal from under their asses. They aren’t being treated and related to in a fashion which makes them the prize and they don’t know how to deal with it.

A couple examples, which I thought was just good fun – and you have to understand the dry delivery which doesn’t come over so well via written text…

#1 I was sitting alone at the bar of this local Mexican joint. I ordered fajitas. The bartender (young female) asked me: “Carne asada or steak?”….Me – “What would YOU get?”….Her- “Carne asada!”. Me- “Then I’ll take STEAK!”<—-Raised eyebrows and s~~~ eating sarcastic upside down lips. The girl just rolled her eyes and said “really!!?!?!!?” And has been timid/hesitant in relating to me ever since.

#2 I’m sitting on the patio having a drink and a smoke. This waitress is delivering two plates of food to a table. She puts one dish down. Then, as she’s placing the other down, she drops the ENTIRE. F~~~ING.CHEESEBURGER on the ground. The ENTIRE f~~~ing cheeseburger…I didn’t say a word. A few minutes later I’m inside the bar ordering a drink. She passes by. I turn to her, with a smug dry face and finger raised to the sky and ask – “Excuse me. Do you know where I can get a refurbished cheeseburger?”…She got p~~~ed LOL…As I’m typing this I seriously am laughing at my own joke. The joke wasn’t on HER it was meant to be self-deprecating, as though I’m so cheap I want a busted, floor-worn burger LOL. And add to it, the convoluted construation ‘refurbished’ and I think it to be funny, no? LOL.

Anyway, am I just an asshole or is it a chick thing? And please don’t butter this up just because were all dudes. I know some people don’t like/get sarcasm or dry humor, which is fine ‘n dandy, but I find it’s almost ALWAYS females who get p~~~ed.

Thoughts?

Resident cynic.

[Anonymous 3]

I think you might be Autistic.

[AncientwisdomParticipant 6089]

LOL why so serious? =D…No really, tell me more.

Resident cynic.

[Anonymous 11]

Dude, those c~~~s should have laughed especially the #2 one. I like f~~~ing with people too.

It’s not you. It’s them. They’re always peeved about something. Maybe #1 was having issues with a Chad?

[JackinovParticipant 5229]

I get that type of humor quite well, and no, most chicks don’t get it.

are you a chia pet in man drag

[MattNYCParticipant 2329]

Ancientwisdom wrote:

“What would YOU get?”….Her- “Carne asada!”. Me- “Then I’ll take STEAK!”

Ancientwisdom wrote:

“Excuse me. Do you know where I can get a refurbished cheeseburger?”…She got p~~~ed LOL

Depends. If you look like Chad it’s bold flirting. If not, sexual harassment.

[EyeswideopenParticipant 2930]

AncientWisdom (welcome back – I think you have not posted for a while);

My $0.02, not a personal attack on you.

I just don’t get the point of being confrontational/standoffish in such simple interactions. In your first example, you asked for someone’s suggestion with the express purpose of blatantly doing the opposite. Why? Positions reversed, I would think you were acting like a tool.

In your second interaction, the waitress made a simple mistake that anyone could have perpetrated. If you want to send a message, you can elect to not provide a tip.

In both examples, a negative response might be warranted if either waitress had tried to use the vagina pass to minimize their culpability in the situation.

Even though western society is unfairly stacked against men with regards to family law and social benefits I just don’t see the point of being an asshole/anti-social/standoffish. I like women; I just don’t like the grave disparity that marriage/cohabitation/procreation has created in western society towards men.

In short, you are acting like an asshole.

- Marriage is described as an institution. You would have to be crazy to be commited to it. -"If you want to live a happy life, tie it to a goal. Not people or things" Albert Einstein

[Pedal, run, rowParticipant]

You cannot use women as your asshole meter.
You have to go off of other men.

Me, I worked hard in this world, never got a free ride. I don’t like being f~~~ed with while working, and I don’t f~~~ with other people who are trying to work.

There is a difference between joking to relieve some tension over a mistake, and trying to make the other person look stupid. If the men laugh with you, you are probably on the right side of the humor spectrum (see what I did there?), if they ignore you because they want to break your face and don’t want to get fired, you are on the wrong side of it.

[JimBoLeaParticipant 1891]

THERE IS A SONG.

LILITH IS THE HEAD SUCCUBUS AND SHE LIVES ON THE DARK SIDE OF THE MOON

[AncientwisdomParticipant 6089]

Eyeswideopen wrote:

In short, you are acting like an asshole.

=D

HaHAHAHAH…see, I love this. To the point. Short. Blunt. Said with moxie. Well done sir (hand clap).

I appreciate your honest opinion and I am in no way offended. I think some people just don’t like ball-busting humor/sarcasm. Which is entirely fine. In fact, I would venture to say MOST people don’t. I happen to be an exception.

Resident cynic.

[TicParticipant 4329]

LOL. Personally, I try to avoid interaction with these bitches, but, I completely get your style. Deep down, women love sarcastic f~~~s like you. I’m the same ONLY if I know the chick well. Otherwise, I ghost.

God bless peace and freedom.

[Anonymous 3]

An asshole is someone that intentionally p~~~es people off and otherwise doesn’t care.

You’re not an asshole, because if you were, you most certainly wouldn’t be asking about it and wouldn’t be so concerned with what these women and other men think.

An Autistic is someone that genuinely doesn’t understand why their words aren’t taken in a positive light, and doesn’t understand what is proper speech in social settings. They have no idea how to read emotions and how to understand how other people will react.

You don’t understand why what you said wasn’t taken as a “joke” and that people didn’t like it. That’s textbook Autism.

You should see a professional, but instead of doing that you’ll make excuses and laugh about “being an asshole”. You posted this thread to get affirmation, some other people gave it to you. You claimed you wanted it straight, and applauded those that affirmed what you wanted to hear.

I’m giving you the actual truth, and you’re not going to like it, so you’ll make an excuse or otherwise attack me for it. Whatever, I don’t really care. I just mention things because it’s my nature to be honest and try to help others when I can and it doesn’t require much effort out of me.

[Pedal, run, rowParticipant]

Jeff S wants a word with you. 🙂

[AncientwisdomParticipant 6089]

Anonymous wrote:

You posted this thread to get affirmation, some other people gave it to you. You claimed you wanted it straight, and applauded those that affirmed what you wanted to hear.

Actually, the only standing ovation I gave was to the first person who called me an asshole…See above. You didn’t get that? What, are you autistic LooOOoOooOOoL? = D

Resident cynic.

[All OutParticipant 87]

I can relate. I have been called just about every name under the sun for doing similar things. The guys a hang around with and work with don’t care and find it funny but all the women I interact with get p~~~ed. I attribute this to not following the norm for society. Women expect to be treated a certain way (be put on the pedestal) because vagina and when you don’t follow the “rules” they get p~~~ed.

A girl ask me to buy her a drink (just by asking for a free drink means she is not my type) so I called the bartender over and ordered a scotch neat. She looked at me completely puzzled, so I said what you don’t like scotch? I all heard was a couple of curse words and she walked away. Then I enjoyed my scotch.

The most fun I have is telling women I am a teacher (while not 100% true it is not a lie) and they assume I don’t make much money and lose interest then a friend tells them how much a actually make. Then it is sad faces and curse words.

Maybe something is wrong with me but I thoroughly enjoy this stuff and I appreciate that I’m not the only one.

[CUNTHATERParticipant 324]

funny posts but like another poster said you’d have to take the sex of the person out of it to truly determine if you were acting like an a-hole. Would you have said those things to a guy and how would you think they’d react?….or probably more importantly, would you appreciate someone saying those things to you if you were in his/her shoes?.

American cunts constantly think they live in a reality TV show.....Evil POSs....ALL CUNTS ARE THE SAME….THERE ARE NO UNICORNS!!! EVEN CHURCH GOING, PROCLAIMED VIRGINS ARE THE SAME CUNTS…..THEY ALL MONKEY BRANCH…TO HELL WITH THEM ALL!!!

[Anonymous 42]

Refurbished cheeseburger? She probably thought you were referring to her pussy…

[Pedal, run, rowParticipant]

Anonymous wrote:

Refurbished cheeseburger? She probably thought you were referring to her pussy…

Now that is a funny joke right there.

[finallyfreeParticipant 341]

Ancient wisdom, you’re fine dude. Just having a little fun with the ladies which I totally understand. To call you Autistic because of a few smart ass comments you made while in public is a big stretch and laughable at best?? Recently I went to purchase one of those 2 dollar scratch off tickets from a gas station ( I was bored). I approach the counter and say ” I’ll take 1 of the Jelly belly tickets” and point to the ticket which is BIG and blue sitting right in front of the little t~~~ at the counter. She tells me to choose a number from the big display with all the tickets on it. I respond “Its the big blue one hanging right there in front of you that says JELLY BELLY on it”. You could see the instant anger appear on her face as she grabbed it off the spool and sold it to me. I mean come on retard you sell these all dam day, you know which one I’m talking about. She just wanted to make me give her a damn number because she could. The guy behind me chuckled.

[DorkShitParticipant 4353]

You should see what they do to your meat in the back room.

They have a special seasoning that is reserved for assholes.

Funny also comes in the dish she will serve…

Peace brothers

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