Home › Forums › Relations~~~s › Just found out I was cucked…happy new year!
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coolthingy450 8 months, 1 week ago.
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Personally, I think you’re overacting to what happened 10 years ago. The fact that she kissed the guy before she got with you, it was pretty clear that she was ready to move on and just hadn’t told you yet. That aspect doesn’t bother me too much. I think you’reI’d be more concerned about the 10 year failed marriage, and the fact that she was willing to start dating you before her current marriage was over. You didn’t give details, but why did that end? Why could she not wait till after the D was final to seek you out?If your goal is to get married and have kids though, I think this is your shot. It’s a s~~~ty option, but this is the devil you know. It’s pretty obvious though that the honeymoon will be over the second you give her a kid. Then you’ll see the real her.
Thanks for the different opinion, you are basically saying that it’s better to go with the devil I know than the devil(s) I don’t if my goal is to get married and have kids. Gotta say this was a pretty sobering comment, but interesting nonetheless.According to her, the reason for her divorce was verbal and physical abuse, and more importantly, a husband who was into and forced her to engage in cuckoldry.
And you believe her becouse?Are you insane.Ok stop just think for a moment.She is:A liarUnfaithfullManipulativeWhy on hells name wold you beliebe anything that woman says?Just why?You know what f~~~ it, go marry her right now, gave a few kids, when the divorce come and you are about to lose everything PLEASEEEEEE GO ALL OUT AND KILL AS MUCH PEOPLE AS YOU CANjesus even my alien is like “f~~~ this guy”Im out, not answering or reading this anymore.
Hey Carnage, why are you such a dick? You were a dick with my Introduction post too.
I do appreciate your comments thus far. But you and your alien can f~~~ off now. Thanks.Frankly, the backbone and attitude you have just displayed to Carnage, you need to display to this bitch who’s hoping you’re going to be her captain save a ho.
Women want everything, but want responsibility and accountability for nothing.
Kissed = fooled around with or f~~~edThis post sounds a bit tuna, but benefit of the doubt. She looked you up and you reconnected out of nostalgia. You have a scarcity mindset and low self esteem. She ain’t no keeper and you are better well rid. Good luck to you.
You are so totally right. Women always downplay what they did. She definitely f~~~ed the guy.
Women want everything, but want responsibility and accountability for nothing.
It sounds like you have a severe case of one-itis. You have worked yourself up into believing that this woman is that special one and that you’re somehow meant to be together. Don’t fall into this trap. Your story is no different from a million others, where women contacted their old boyfriends looking to restart something. Women are hypergamous. They monkey branch. But sometimes they miss the next branch up and fall to the ground. So they have to start over. Don’t be flattered thinking that this woman loves you; she is just using you as her first “branch” again.
Not just that but the monkey that hit the ground hard like her is not going to jump first for the high branches… she is going to go for what she PERCEIVES to be the low hanging branch first… the easy mark.Its now 13 years later… YOU are the prize not her. Men past the age of 30/35 are on an upward trajectory; women are on the downward trajectory, if they haven’t hit the Wall already outright. Why do you want to invest relationship “dollars” into something that is depreciating?I don’t normally advocate hookers, but you should do something like go to Thailand, and have two or three 19-year old hot Thai girls f~~~ you like it is your last week on Earth. That might be enough to kill the “one-itis” infection you seem to have.
Not going to lie. Im so going to enjoy banging asians. Mainly due to the fact that its a different face really, and tight if they haven’t screwed much yet.
I had fun in early 2017 having both a blond gf and an Asian gf. Nothing like f~~~ing one in the afternoon, and the other later at night. I f~~~ed them in different beds in my house, to avoid the possibility of “incorrect” hairs appearing in the wrong bed.
All my life I've had doubts about who I am, where I belonged. Now I'm like the arrow that springs from the bow. No hesitation, no doubts. The path is clear. And what are you? Alive. Everything else is negotiable. Women have rights; men have responsibilities; MGTOW have freedom. Marriage is for chumps. If someone stands in the way of true justice, you simply walk up behind them and stab them in the heart-R'as al Ghul.
Run the f~~~ away and do it now. While you still can. News flash…those kids you desire will NOT belong to you. Even if they are biologically yours – the government and cupcake will own and control them…and you…100%. Do you want to pour all your resources and precious time on this planet into something so disenfranchised from your life? As for this princess, do not believe a single thing coming out of her mouth. She is severely damaged goods who, if she hasn’t already, is about to pass through the wall. She knows this and is desperate to latch onto a husbank and sperm bank before her looks fade.
Look brother, I dont fault you at this point for wanting the things you think you can have. But it’s an illusion. I’ve been part of this forum for over three years. I’ve swallowed enough red pills to fill a freaking pharmacy so for your own sake – listen to what I and the others are telling you. Good luck.
My advice to you is to re-read your post a few more times. The answer you seek is already within it.
All you asked for is for support about your already given decision, and we will not change your mind, at all.
So, read it again a few times. If your situation does not revolt your stomach to the point of vomiting, you have not yet digested the red pill.Go your own way. It is your life, so only you know what you will do with it.
"Young was I once, I walked alone, and bewildered seemed in the way; then I found me another and rich I thought me, for man is the joy of man." Odin, Hàvamàl, stanza 47.
Sure she cheated , they all do..
First of all, I wanted to thank EVERYONE who took the time to read my story and to comment (that goes for you too, Carnage). There are some comments I would like to respond to individually, but know that every comment is appreciated.
I wanted to give an update on my story. Feel free to comment.
I wrote my original post during work hours yesterday (this post is also being written during work hours, hopefully I’m not fired). I went home around 5 and my ex-girlfriend was lying on the bed looking at Pinterest on her iPad. We hadn’t talked for the whole day yesterday because I needed space from her. When I got in, I sat on the bed and we still didn’t talk to each other beyond a ‘hey.’ She continued looking at Pinterest and Instagram and I started solving Chess tactics. I felt very defeated and sad, and I think she did too. Eventually, she asked how my day went and that started the conversation between us. She asked me if I could rent her car for her return trip back home, and that she would pay me back in cash, and I said yes. I bought her car and she paid me back cash. We then elected to go get some Mexican food.
One thing I noticed was how much more unsettling it was just to go out with her after knowing that she had cheated on me. I started viewing everyone around me as potential partners for her, from the restaurant host, to the waiter, to some of the patrons. I felt threatened by pretty much everyone in the restaurant. We sat down, and ate dinner. I again paid using my credit card, and she paid me back immediately in cash. We then went home.
At home, I opened a bottle of beer and she rolled a J. We split the beer and smoked the J and talked.
She was less apologetic now compared to the other day. Her main arguments were that I was getting mad at her for something that she did 15 years ago, which she was extremely sorry about, and that I had also cheated on her multiple times, which is true. That we both had f~~~ed up and been dishonest. During a lucid moment in my LSD trip, I had told her that given the new information of her cheating, I was breaking up with her, and that I would need space to build myself back together. Last night, she asked if that meant that after she leaves on Friday we might never talk again for the rest of our lives. I told her that that was a possibility. She looked at me in disbelief and when I told her I was serious, she got extremely angry and started crying. She told me that if we love each other we can get past this, that we can rebuild the trust and that this is not enough to throw everything we have away. I reiterated that I needed to take the time to build myself back up, that my self-esteem was in the gutter, and that in the future we might get back together, but that there was also the possibility that we would not. She then asked me if I found out that she was in the hospital during this period away from her, would I even call to check on her, or if she died, would I go to her funeral? I don’t remember exactly how I responded; I believe I said I would check on her and attend her funeral, and I would.
I know most of you think this girl is a lying c~~~. I ask you to suspend your opinions for a moment and take what she says as the truth, just for the sake of argument. I have questioned her repeatedly on what she did when she cheated on me. And you can call me a gullible, naive asshole, but I do believe that she just kissed him when she cheated, or at least didn’t f~~~ him at that time. I also have dealt with a lot of women in my life, and I have had my fair share of the complete and utter psychotic bitches. Based on all my interactions with this girl, on the times she has supported me, on the times she has gone above and beyond to help me, on the times that she has indeed been there for me, I cannot in good faith put her in the psychotic uber-c~~~ category. You guys will have to trust me on this one. I do love her and I have dealt with so much worse than this girl. It is true that since reconnecting, I have never trusted her 100%, and I trust her even less now. But that said, she has shown me, through actions, that she does have good qualities, qualities that at one point sparked my love in her.
One comment I think was interesting was when she said “M. is so lucky.” For a little context, M. is her BFF from high school. I also know that M. was previously married and during her marriage had a three year affair with someone from her high school. Having found out about the affair, M and her husband mutually filed for a divorce. M. then dated another guy, and is now pregnant and engaged to this new guy. My ex-girlfriend stated that M. was lucky because her husband still wanted her back despite the fact that she had had a 3-year affair, that she was pregnant even though doctors had told her she wouldn’t be able to be, and that she had a loving boyfriend who had just proposed. I found it odd that she would think of M. as someone who has had a lucky life, and I question her values if she remains friends with someone who had a three year affair on her husband.
Eventually last night, my ex-girlfriend and I f~~~ed. We had oral sex of every variation, and I banged her from the back. I felt, and still feel, like a cuck. The sex was pleasurable but a voice in my head was telling me ‘you are her bitch.’ I don’t think that voice can ever go away. In fact, it may only get louder.
Today is my last day with her; tomorrow morning she hits the road and drives back home. I am scared about the void and I am scared about not having anyone to talk to when she leaves. As I mentioned in a previous post, I cringe thinking about the dating pool. Out of all the girls I’ve ever dated, this girl is probably in my top 1 or 2, out of maybe 30 or so, so I feel the odds are against me finding someone better than her. But I realize I might have to bite the bullet and play those s~~~ty odds, because I don’t want to spend my life as her cuck.
Thanks again for listening.
She is playing you, hard, and she even said how “lucky” that a cheating liar of your high school colleague is “so lucky”, because her cuck of a husband accepted her back, and you are STILL wondering if she “might be the one”?
FFS, are you out of your god damned mind? She took 15 F~~~ING YEARS to tell you that she cheated on you, all the while she DEMANDED that you told her right away if you cheated, and you complied. DOUBLE STANDARDS AT ITS FINEST.
Wake up, man. Wake the F~~~ UP.I am not going to be sorry for all that, but seems to me that you need a damned bitch slap to see if you wake up from that s~~~ty situation you are putting yourself in, just because this woman might be great at sex? WTF are you doing, and why the hell your standards are so low? So many red flags waving at your face, and yet, you REFUSE to open your eyes and see them, just because you THINK she loves you? Or because you think you will die alone?
We ALL die alone, kid. ALL. Nobody will die with you, holding your hand and all that romantic stuff, in the end, it is the Reaper and you.
So, drop that illusion that you will “die alone”, because we all will die like that. Being alone and being LONE are two diferente things, and seems like you are damn scared to be in your own company, it seems like you need someone to keep you in check, so you don’t end yourself up. That is known around here as “male-mother need”, and believe me, YOU DON’T. Nobody does.So, pull yourself together, man. The problem is not HER, she is a SYMPTOM of the real disease. The problem is the SYSTEM, and you are falling right into the trap because “she loves me”… Yeah, right.
Have you investigated WHY she went back to you? If she might possibly be thrown out of her house by her ex-husband, or if she will be completely broke after she gets divourced from him? Have you checked if she committed any DV, or if she had any case of mental disease, so that is why she is leaving her husband while getting NO CAR, NO HOUSE AND NO KIDS, in the sure-fire exercise of being rewarded for the divource, just because vagina?
I suspect you did not! And yet, you are willingly putting your head in the crocodile’s mouth!NUTS!
"Young was I once, I walked alone, and bewildered seemed in the way; then I found me another and rich I thought me, for man is the joy of man." Odin, Hàvamàl, stanza 47.
First of all, I wanted to thank EVERYONE who took the time to read my story and to comment (that goes for you too, Carnage). There are some comments I would like to respond to individually, but know that every comment is appreciated.
I wanted to give an update on my story. Feel free to comment.
I wrote my original post during work hours yesterday (this post is also being written during work hours, hopefully I’m not fired). I went home around 5 and my ex-girlfriend was lying on the bed looking at Pinterest on her iPad. We hadn’t talked for the whole day yesterday because I needed space from her. When I got in, I sat on the bed and we still didn’t talk to each other beyond a ‘hey.’ She continued looking at Pinterest and Instagram and I started solving Chess tactics. I felt very defeated and sad, and I think she did too. Eventually, she asked how my day went and that started the conversation between us. She asked me if I could rent her car for her return trip back home, and that she would pay me back in cash, and I said yes. I bought her car and she paid me back cash. We then elected to go get some Mexican food.
One thing I noticed was how much more unsettling it was just to go out with her after knowing that she had cheated on me. I started viewing everyone around me as potential partners for her, from the restaurant host, to the waiter, to some of the patrons. I felt threatened by pretty much everyone in the restaurant. We sat down, and ate dinner. I again paid using my credit card, and she paid me back immediately in cash. We then went home.
At home, I opened a bottle of beer and she rolled a J. We split the beer and smoked the J and talked.
She was less apologetic now compared to the other day. Her main arguments were that I was getting mad at her for something that she did 15 years ago, which she was extremely sorry about, and that I had also cheated on her multiple times, which is true. That we both had f~~~ed up and been dishonest. During a lucid moment in my LSD trip, I had told her that given the new information of her cheating, I was breaking up with her, and that I would need space to build myself back together. Last night, she asked if that meant that after she leaves on Friday we might never talk again for the rest of our lives. I told her that that was a possibility. She looked at me in disbelief and when I told her I was serious, she got extremely angry and started crying. She told me that if we love each other we can get past this, that we can rebuild the trust and that this is not enough to throw everything we have away. I reiterated that I needed to take the time to build myself back up, that my self-esteem was in the gutter, and that in the future we might get back together, but that there was also the possibility that we would not. She then asked me if I found out that she was in the hospital during this period away from her, would I even call to check on her, or if she died, would I go to her funeral? I don’t remember exactly how I responded; I believe I said I would check on her and attend her funeral, and I would.
I know most of you think this girl is a lying c~~~. I ask you to suspend your opinions for a moment and take what she says as the truth, just for the sake of argument. I have questioned her repeatedly on what she did when she cheated on me. And you can call me a gullible, naive asshole, but I do believe that she just kissed him when she cheated, or at least didn’t f~~~ him at that time. I also have dealt with a lot of women in my life, and I have had my fair share of the complete and utter psychotic bitches. Based on all my interactions with this girl, on the times she has supported me, on the times she has gone above and beyond to help me, on the times that she has indeed been there for me, I cannot in good faith put her in the psychotic uber-c~~~ category. You guys will have to trust me on this one. I do love her and I have dealt with so much worse than this girl. It is true that since reconnecting, I have never trusted her 100%, and I trust her even less now. But that said, she has shown me, through actions, that she does have good qualities, qualities that at one point sparked my love in her.
One comment I think was interesting was when she said “M. is so lucky.” For a little context, M. is her BFF from high school. I also know that M. was previously married and during her marriage had a three year affair with someone from her high school. Having found out about the affair, M and her husband mutually filed for a divorce. M. then dated another guy, and is now pregnant and engaged to this new guy. My ex-girlfriend stated that M. was lucky because her husband still wanted her back despite the fact that she had had a 3-year affair, that she was pregnant even though doctors had told her she wouldn’t be able to be, and that she had a loving boyfriend who had just proposed. I found it odd that she would think of M. as someone who has had a lucky life, and I question her values if she remains friends with someone who had a three year affair on her husband.
Eventually last night, my ex-girlfriend and I f~~~ed. We had oral sex of every variation, and I banged her from the back. I felt, and still feel, like a cuck. The sex was pleasurable but a voice in my head was telling me ‘you are her bitch.’ I don’t think that voice can ever go away. In fact, it may only get louder.
Today is my last day with her; tomorrow morning she hits the road and drives back home. I am scared about the void and I am scared about not having anyone to talk to when she leaves. As I mentioned in a previous post, I cringe thinking about the dating pool. Out of all the girls I’ve ever dated, this girl is probably in my top 1 or 2, out of maybe 30 or so, so I feel the odds are against me finding someone better than her. But I realize I might have to bite the bullet and play those s~~~ty odds, because I don’t want to spend my life as her cuck.
Thanks again for listening.Unfortunately we cannot help you. You have the nawalt/unicorn/pussy chasing beta mindset going on. You are obssessed with the idea of her and what she may have represented a long, long time ago – maybe – not what she is.
No more to be said.
Women want everything, but want responsibility and accountability for nothing.
Unfortunately we cannot help you. You have the nawalt/unicorn/pussy chasing beta mindset going on. You are obssessed with the idea of her and what she may have represented a long, long time ago – maybe – not what she is.
No more to be said.
Then don’t say anything else. Thanks for your comments thus far.
I want you to flip a coin. Heads she stays, tails she leaves tomorrow. Ready? Toss it, catch it in one hand, and flip it onto your other hand. Ready to look? OK, start to pull your hand off and…………STOP! Which are you hoping for?
There’s your answer. Good luck.
Order the good wine
Thanks for the different opinion, you are basically saying that it’s better to go with the devil I know than the devil(s) I don’t if my goal is to get married and have kids. Gotta say this was a pretty sobering comment, but interesting nonetheless.
According to her, the reason for her divorce was verbal and physical abuse, and more importantly, a husband who was into and forced her to engage in cuckoldry.I probably wasn’t clear on this. Your main issue isn’t her, but you’re own perception about your own worth, marriage, and kids. This is going to screw up your life whether you marry this woman or marry someone else. If you’re not going to change the way you look at life now, you might as well marry this one and get it over with. Maybe you still be able to have some life after it’s all done.
The fact that you preface with ‘according to her’ tells me that you don’t really believe her. There’s probably some element of truth. Like, he called her a bitch after she called him an asshole. He hurt her wrist as he blocked her attempt to slap her. And he decided that if she was going to cheat, he at least wanted to watch.
Back when I used to date, I would always listen carefully when a divorced woman said a marriage ended for this or that reason. Never ever did they are find any blame in themselves.
Ok. Then do it.
Correction: You’re not the only one she has cucked . . . take her current husband as an example. Got to wonder if she messed around with him on her way out from Chad.
Calling you the “love of her life” and taking out her anger on you, using you for money, or kissing Chad on her way out is very common. Sounds like what she thinks of as love differs from your definition.To be with a woman is to be cucked. Even if you’re Superman or Brad Pitt… It’s not about you, it’s just what all women (and some men) do given the chance eventually.
She longed to be with you because she is a shifter… you’re the guy she left behind so she’ll romanticize it when she gets bored with her current guy (husband), and if she married you she’d do the same (or go kiss Chad if dating you). Notice a pattern?
This behavioral pattern is the truth, and not anything a woman ever says to you."Once you’ve taken care of the basics, there’s very little in this world for which your life is worth deferring." -David Hansson. "It’s not when women are mean or nasty that anything is out of the ordinary. It’s when they are NICE to you that you have to be on high alert..." -Jackinov.
I cringe thinking about the dating pool. Out of all the girls I’ve ever dated, this girl is probably in my top 1 or 2, out of maybe 30 or so, so I feel the odds are against me finding someone better than her. But I realize I might have to bite the bullet and play those s~~~ty odds, because I don’t want to spend my life as her cuck.
WOW, so you’re ready to jump back into dating sooner or later.
Dating Leads to Relationships
Relationships Lead to Cohabitation
Cohabitation Leads to Marriage
They EACH Lead to Misery….
Unfortunately, I think that you’re going to have to learn the hard way either with this one or some other one.
Good Luck to You, I sincerely wish you the best on whatever path that YOU CHOOSE.
In a World of Justin Beibers Be a Johnny Cash
She f~~~ed you while “separated” from her husband. If she was really trying to fix her marriage that wouldn’t happen. You are justifying it in your mind because you felt your relationship with her was special…..and that it makes it ok for her to f~~~ you while married to someone else.
Also, you admitted openly that you cheated on her several times back then. So it doesn’t make any sense that you are upset about her doing it to you.
She is/was untrustworthy and it sounds like you are as well. This probably won’t end well regardless of your decision because neither of you will be faithful.
(duplicate post)
"Once you’ve taken care of the basics, there’s very little in this world for which your life is worth deferring." -David Hansson. "It’s not when women are mean or nasty that anything is out of the ordinary. It’s when they are NICE to you that you have to be on high alert..." -Jackinov.
You feel like her cuck because she kissed another guy.
Wait til the real s~~~ starts.
All While you’re bangin her married ass.
I’m glad I’ve lived through these situations with insane women because afterwards when things happened they were generally no big deal.
You’re mad now, but once you’re on the receiving end of more serious issues, or REAL cheating, looking back this will seem like diet soda.Women are illusion crafters. She broke frame by telling you and you felt a sharp bite of truth, and she learned how fragile illusions can be. If she’s smart she won’t break frame again.
"Once you’ve taken care of the basics, there’s very little in this world for which your life is worth deferring." -David Hansson. "It’s not when women are mean or nasty that anything is out of the ordinary. It’s when they are NICE to you that you have to be on high alert..." -Jackinov.
I do want to have kids and a family,
No, you don’t.
And you weren’t cucked, because you didn’t know. You were cheated on.
You’re being cucked right now, because your 4am girl is someone else’s WIFE. And now… you’re chad.
Get your head out of your ass. What do you want a family for? So you can spend the next five years changing diapers and cleaning up throw up, and have your girl ass rape you in divorce court?
Having children is like having employees who disrespect you all the time, don’t ever do what you say, and you can NEVER FIRE THEM.
You need to go all the way back and watch all the Stardusk videos from the very beginning. I suggest you take four weeks off from work to do this, before you destroy your life forever.
Like I said before, the post is 100% true
Methinks you doth protest too much.
So you say she says she is suicidal. Let me tell you something…
STAY THE F~~~ AWAY FROM THIS CRAZY C~~~ FOREVER!!
CHANGE YOUR PHONE NUBMER!!!
NEVER CONTACT HER!!!!
MOVE TO A NEW APARTMENT IN A NEW TOWN!!!!!! WHATEVER THE F~~~ YOU GOTTA DO.
STAY AWAY FROM SUICIDAL BITCHES!!!!!
And lay off the f~~~ing Acid. Are you insane? You owe Carnage an apology. You’re the one on acid.
Go read Eckhart Tolle.
Best of luck, brother.
Nil Desperandum,
Please hear me out on what I’m about to say. I am begging you, because I actually do care about you. No, I don’t know you, but I would like to see you make the wise choice. It would be really wonderful to know that you escaped from the disaster you’re about to bring into your life. I really mean that.
You have told us about how bothered you are by the fact that this woman kissed a man behind your back. It is really burning you up.
Step into the shoes of the husband whose wife you are now f~~~ing. How do you think he feels?
And now, step back into your own shoes and imagine this woman becomes your wife, and in a few years, she’s banging somebody else, and YOU are the husband that she’s separated from. How will you feel then?
How would you feel about her f~~~ing somebody behind your back and then separating from you and taking your kids from you?
I PROMISE YOU THIS IS WHAT’S GOING TO HAPPEN IF YOU CONTINUE WITH THIS WOMAN.
If this woman is willing to divorce after a ten year marriage, and is willing to f~~~ you behind her husband’s back while she is technically still married, then it’s going to happen to you too. I cannot emphasize strongly enough how sure this is. I would bet every last dollar I have and my house and my car on this. For the love of God, don’t be a fool.
When she married her current husband, I bet he was 100% sure that it would never happen to him. I bet he thought his wife would never cheat or divorce him. And now here you are, with the clearest evidence RIGHT IN FRONT OF YOU that she is a cheater, and you are spinning all kinds of sugary thoughts in your head about how wonderful your life will be with this woman. Because she’s being nice to you (sometimes). Because you are getting some vagina. Dude… don’t you realize that this is exactly what her estranged husband once thought? I’ll bet she was nice to him and they had a lot of sex in the beginning, too.
Back on the subject of kids…
Why the hell are you dropping acid and entertaining thoughts of having children? Remember what I said about selfishness? You have no damn right to be doing drugs if you want kids. You have no right to hurt their future by destabilizing yourself and your family. Do whatever you want to yourself, but when you have kids you have no right to be selfish. Dropping acid is incredibly selfish if you’re a father. You are so far away from being able to be a responsible parent, you need to put that thought out of your head permanently until you’ve made some serious changes in your life.
And that woman you’re with is regularly getting stoned. F~~~ me sideways. Come on, man, do you honestly think that the two of you are going to make even halfway decent parents? Why on earth would you even want kids if they’re just going to grow up and hate you because of how badly you’re guaranteed to raise them?
Would you want a pet dog that is feral and bites you anytime you get close? Would you want a pet cat that will scratch the s~~~ out of you if you even look at it funny?
Finally, you keep lamenting about how scared you are to “get back into the dating pool” because you’re afraid you’re going to fail and be alone. For crying out loud… did you read my comments about self-reliance, independence, and solitude? At 37 years old, are you still a little boy who is afraid of the dark?
Grow the f~~~ up, learn how to be happy on your own, gain a healthy sense of independence and self-reliance, quit dropping acid, stop obsessing about vagina, and for the love of God, GET RID OF THIS WOMAN.
"Are you loosed from a wife? Do not seek a wife." --Apostle Paul
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