advice needed on anxious, ranting girlfriend

[Catch And ReleaseParticipant 133]

Shine wrote:

Does she work a high paying stressful job as she is academically high-achieving? Maybe that and her family treating her like crap is making her stressed?

I was slow to get back to this topic, was too short on time the last 24 hours to properly make my point.

Now, this is just my opinion, but with people like this attempting to analyze root causes and stress triggers is an absolute waste of time. She enjoys the outbursts of rage. It is a part of who she is, it makes her world go ’round. Fix one of her sources of stress, she’ll find something else to lash out about. Some people enjoy misery, and this isn’t strictly a woman thing either. They are a magnet for drama, they find it, suck it into their world and dwell on it.

There is no “doing better”, seeking understanding, helping them to move on, whatever. Today she’s p~~~ed off you tripped over her mess on the floor. Tomorrow she’ll lose her s~~~ because you made spaghetti that is too firm, and the next time you make spaghetti and cook it longer she’ll lose her s~~~ because it is too soft. Just looking at the evidence in the original post, I am confident she is this type of person who enjoys the misery and even goes so far as to set up opportunities to lash out.

In point #2 I see a clear setup. With no valid excuse for keeping untidy junk, it is there solely for the purpose of lashing out when the OP touches said junk.

In point #3 the OP speaks of continual negativity and ranting. Negativity breeds more negativity, this person will never have a positive atmosphere about them. If negative thoughts are all that occupy one’s mind, it is harder to enjoy the positive moments in life. Some people are so distracted by the negativity that they don’t even notice those positive moments. It’s like they never even happened.

In point #5, she’s seeking justification for her actions. Rather than paying a true professional to help her, she’s spending money on people that make a living off of manipulating their customers. Of course a psychic is going to help them don a suit of armour with which they will deflect any blame like some sort of super hero. Given the circumstances, no psychic is going to tell her “bitch, you’re crazy, get professional help” because that won’t get them many repeat customers.

In point #6 she ignores a simple request for tidiness and organization. This goes back to what I said about point #2, it isn’t a difficult thing for her to rectify but she rather enjoys the way things are now.

In point #8 I see another setup. She’s seeking a negative response to her request for menial tasks when the OP is already busy. It is a win-win situation because with compliance she will see how far she can push the OP with her bulls~~~ but at the same time if the OP doesn’t jump at her every whim it gives her an opportunity to impart drama on the situation and further lash out.

[BobbyParticipant 140]

Your analysis is excellent. Thank you.

[BobbyParticipant 140]

She has held many stressful jobs.

[anonymousyamParticipant 4605]

Bobby wrote:

What are your opinions?

2 Words get and out

Just an east coast asshole who likes to curse, If you get offended by words like fuck, cunt, shit, piss, bitch or any racial slurs then you just scroll down.

[OldBillParticipant]

Bobby wrote:

She has held many stressful jobs.

Now you’re just making more excuses for her.

Do you even listen to yourself? You’re apologizing for her wretched behavior. You’re offering up excuses for why she treats you like s~~~. Does that sound normal? Does that sound healthy?

You’re so c~~~struck you cannot even defend yourself.

You want advice? Get the f~~~ away from this woman immediately before she damages you even further.

You’re being psychologically manipulated by an amoral fiend who cares nothing for you. Nothing.

Get out before you’re permanently damaged, you fool.

Do not date. Do not impregnate. Do not co-habitate. Above all, do not marry. Reclaim and never again surrender your personal sovereignty.

[AwakenedParticipant 35203]

OldBill wrote:

Get out before you’re permanently damaged, you fool.

I think he know that he should go, but he won’t. I’m not sure why he actually posted asking for suggestions on what to do because I don’t think he’s going to ACT on them.

Unfortunately, regardless of the red flags, and this guy has a parade full of flags, some men must learn the hard way. I think Bobby is one of those guys that will have to learn the hard way, but he’s not alone I too had to learn the hard way, but I definitely didn’t have this CRAZY of a bitch to start with. It took her awhile after marriage before she became nuts.

Bobby, just go get married. You really seem like you want to be captain save a ho to help satisfy your blue pill urges. So, iron up the cape, and just go do it already.

In a World of Justin Beibers Be a Johnny Cash

[SolidParticipant 7520]

AWALT, run away before is too late !

[PhantomParticipant 3328]

Bobby wrote:

I’m living with a woman that occassionaly shouts at me (not just for a few minutes, but intermittently over hours)

I went to the marriage sacrificing altar twice. Spent about 16 yrs of my life married in the ball & chain.

Wait til those hrs morph into days & weeks & years. Yes, some arguments s~~~ tests ran the entire course, especially with my 2nd go around. Same arguments with her countless times.

I was looking at it all wrong. I did not want to fail again in my marriage, she was the best looking female I had ever had, and so on, and I made every excuse for her in the book, as the expression goes.

It is not going to get better, so if you are in it for the long haul with her, this is a glimpse of what a 16 yr snapshot of it looks like.

I still debate myself on if I am permanently damaged as Oldbill put it. I was a fool for signing the line twice & I paid the damn price for doing so…

And no, it doesn’t do a thing for me, to admit all this, other than not seeing another man taking the deep plunge off the deep end.

[MeisterParticipant 2093]

Run, dude, run!!

Monk

[GrumpyParticipant]

Just think of it like an old “Cowboy Movie”

Saddle up and ride of into the sunrise, it will be a new story for you.
Let her ride off into the sunset and end the story of her.

Her anxieties will transfer and manifest themselves with you then it will be your fault in her convoluted way of thinking.
Take care of yourself first, she is responsible for her own s~~~.

There was a time in my life when I gave a fuck. Now you have to pay ME for it

[crimson66Participant 15]

That has some similarities to my current female entanglement.

Always interrupts what I am doing to do some menial task she won’t get off her ass to do herself.
Rants at me or nags all the time about things SHE COULD FIX HERSELF and is also responsible for but WONT.
Therefor my usual perfectly happy/content and carefree disposition is spoiled along with the enjoyment of my hobbies because she is souring my attitude and drive.

Sounds like you need to get rid of her like I do mine.
It is difficult I know…but it is what you know is true.

[Anonymous 9]

OldBill wrote:

Bobby wrote:

She has held many stressful jobs.

Now you’re just making more excuses for her.

Do you even listen to yourself? You’re apologizing for her wretched behavior. You’re offering up excuses for why she treats you like s~~~. Does that sound normal? Does that sound healthy?

You’re so c~~~struck you cannot even defend yourself.

You want advice? Get the f~~~ away from this woman immediately before she damages you even further.

You’re being psychologically manipulated by an amoral fiend who cares nothing for you. Nothing.

Get out before you’re permanently damaged, you fool.

Lol at c~~~struck.

As for OP…

Ge the f~~~ out of dodge.

I’ve been with two women in the past year and they were both crazy.

MGTOW.

[Sparticus66Participant 508]

1) reverse the genders. If you were the mad one you would already be up on a DV charge.
2) she needs psychiatric help. You are not a psychiatrist
3)she will eventually cause you psychiatric problems if you hang with her
4) do not give any money to her or criminal fraudsters ( which they clearly are)
5) wtf were you doing cleaning all the time. Don’t do that for a woman
6)leave her. She won’t be crushed. She’s mad. She’ll find a similarly mad man that tingles her vagina. So leave her before she leaves you
7) leave her
8) leave her

[FermatParticipant 3478]

OldBill wrote:

You’re offering up excuses for why she treats you like s~~~.

All my guy friends are like this. This is the new generation of “nice guys” we have to interact with. There is no saving OP.

I have discovered a truly remarkable list of reasons why women are not necessary for a happy life, but alas this margin is too small to contain it.

[TicParticipant 4329]

been there, done that.

You have no idea how much worse this IS going to get. Not might, but, WILL.

She’ll be broken if you leave, you say? Let me tell you this. You will 100% be broken if you stay with this nut job.

IF you dump her, She ‘ll find some other desperate dude to f~~~ her, guaraf~~~ingteed. She’ll add her time with you as another addition to her SOB story so she can play victim and find some chump to take care of her.

and the icing on the cake: you stay with her and one day, she’ll cheat on you because you were “not emotionally supportive enough.”

Good luck dude, you’re gonna need it.

God bless peace and freedom.

[nick123Participant 137]

Almost every guy here is speaking from experience including myself. SHE WILL F~~~ YOU UP MENTALLY AND WILL LEAVE YOU WITH A BROKEN SPIRIT. But if you dont want to listen to us, fine, you’ll be back in time telling your tale of woe.

[All OutParticipant 87]

I can understand that you are trying to be a white knight and save her from herself but there is no saving her! Only a trained professional with a prescription pad could make any progress with that, trust me I have been there. Her anxiety will become your anxiety and instead of just her having issues you will have them too! Once you have said issues she will blame your issues on making hers worse! I lived through this please learn from our mistakes and don’t make them your mistakes!

[Author]

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