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Tagged: Domestic violence
This topic contains 56 replies, has 34 voices, and was last updated by 
FitzBones 4 years, 5 months ago.
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Arrived via the contact form at 5:30PM today:
What would you tell this guy?
“My wife has been abusing me for almost seven years. im scared. she completely controls every aspect of my life. i recently recorded a 34min conversation where she describes, admits and even brags about a lot of the abuse but not all of it. I’ve contacted detectives without ever receiving a call back. im disabled now, most likely from the physical abuse and i just need some help. someone please just listen to my video and help me before she either kills me or puts me in jail for false accusations again, which she also brags about on the video.
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we have two beautiful baby girls that i have been taking care of by myself since their births and if i leave she has said she’ll hurt them. idk what else to do. also, my wife is racist so i also have to be racist to pacify her. but i am no racist. someone just please help.”
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If you keep doing what you've always done... you're gonna keep getting what you always got.I really feel for this guy. I really do. A divorce would be suggested, but she could do more ruin to him in the proceedings than any form of physical abuse.
I’m also thinking that this guy thought his precious Cupcake “could never be like that” in the beginning and that he might have also shamed other men into marrying because “they don’t know the fun they’re missing.” Hell, my own mother sounds no different than this guy’s wife.
My only advice is to take his girls and get the f~~~ as far away from that state as he is able.
He is fearing for his life. I think a call to 911 is warranted.
Call the cops. Have them escort him out of the house.
Live with friends. Live with family. Get the f~~~ out of that bitch’s radius.
I don’t even know why he’s still talking to her. She wouldn’t last 7 minutes in my life, that’s for sure. And I don’t care how good she thinks she is at sucking dick. Even if my forehead caved in and the sheets went up my ass… I would split 7 seconds after I arced my glob. 7 years and he’s still telling her “i love you, I would do anything for you”.
YOU CAN LEAVE.
You CAN.
If you keep doing what you've always done... you're gonna keep getting what you always got.I would tell him to get away and never look back.The problem with blue pill men is that you could have a t~~~ come and beat the crap out of him and he’ll blame himself, not the t~~~ in the end.
He’ll probably feel guilty for years after…
I only listened to a few minutes of this. I began practicing escaping from women who sound like this one many years ago, and I have gotten so good at it that a few minutes (of a woman sounding like this) is not about all the time it takes me to disappear. As a result of doing that for many long years and becoming better and better at it, a few minutes is about all the tolerance I have for listening to this.
Although this guy can be forgiven for not having had as much practice at escaping as I have, that doesn’t mean I’m going to be that easy on him. However pathologic a relationship is to either, or both participants… they both chose to be there. Each of them is there for a reason. Each of them is there because there is a need that is being met. When the cost becomes greater than the benefit for one of them, it will no longer be paid and the relationship will end.
If he were a woman complaining about an abusive man, my advice would be to get the hell out. I would give that advice because from my point of view, there is nothing an abusive person could offer me in the way of benefit that would inspire to accept that abusive behavior. But that advice is obvious, or at least it should be.
The reality is that an abusive person is defective. And far too often, when the other person in a relationship with that defective person asks for help, they are not asking for help in escaping the relationship. Instead they are asking for help in their effort to try and change their defective person into something not so screwed up. They want help to ‘fix’ that defective person that THEY CHOSE.
Once they make the decision that they are no longer interested in ‘fixing’ that person, they rarely need much help in escaping that person. Last year we saw the news story about two women who’d been kidnapped, chained up for years… believed to be dead… But they intended to escape and they did.
When this guy makes a real decision to escape, the amount of effort it will take her to actually keep him in that relationship will not be worth it for her. She is in that relationship for a reason also, and when he stops serving that purpose for her, whatever it is, she won’t want him anymore anyway.
Stop meeting that need and walk away…
Look, it's not my fault that tornado dropped a house on your sister. Now get back on your broom and get your ass out of here... and take your monkeys with you
When I was 19 I fled the house of my psychopathic mother… I packed silently, tucked tail and ran in the middle of the night… I even pushed my car down the street before starting it up… because I knew the moment she discovered I was gone, all hell would break loose. She’d defrauded the local government out of some charitable funding before this and had told me she’d pin it on me and accuse me of theft and physical abuse of her and my grandmother if I left… so I drove the entire way from south Florida to my friend’s house in Georgia expecting to get bagged and tagged by the highway patrol at any moment.
The threats were real, the fear was real… I pretty sure the gun she waved in my face was real… but once I was out of the state and she was out of my life, she faded away like a bad dream. I never spoke to her again.
You might say that a 19 year old should just stand up and say “f~~~ you” but years of manipulation and emotional torture add up and even the strongest asshole can grow to fear a 50 year old female… especially one as skilled and unpredictable as she was.
Back then I was still weak but these days my “f~~~ you” finger is locked, loaded and ready to fire at a moment’s notice. Nevertheless I still hold back occasionally… the programming to serve, protect, love and cherish females, no matter how vile and despicable their behavior may be, is hard to break completely.
I feel for this guy and if he has any friends or family left in the world, they should extract him.
Here are the obstacles I perceive based on the information above (Disclaimer: This is the interwebz and I’m not an attorney, nor do I play one on TV or Youtube):
1. She’s already had him jailed… this will severely damage his credibility in most legal forums. In some states, he can be jailed for recording her.
2. He is disabled, which will limit his ability to advocate his position effectively.
Frankly, this situation is extreme. Were it me, I’d metaphorically throw the hand grenade in the tent. By this I mean I’d take the recording and contact disability advocates (including any organization that he may be receiving disability compensation from), media outlets and a civil rights attorney who specializes in protecting the disabled under the Americans with Disabilities Act and has been admitted to the Federal Court Bar in his area. This attorney needs to be a man.
Then: DOCUMENT THE S~~~ OUT OF EVERYTHING. (this cannot be stressed enough), take notes, use Evernote if you don’t have paper. email notes to yourself via webmail such as gmail or yahoo, so you get the timestamp. That way people can’t say your email journal was made up later. Then continue to record and upload it to the cloud.
The disability advocate’s job is to protect their clients, so they will link him to resources to protect himself and assist him through the process. Assuming they don’t, that’s where the attorney comes into play. Disabled People have certain protections under civil rights law.
If the appropriate authorities don’t take action to protect this person, file a federal suit in the closest federal court and then do a press release and have the attorney schedule an interview on the local tv station and/or other news outlets. Having the attorney make it happen will create and mitigate many credibility issues SJWs use to disavow or ignore his claims. Once his concerns start being taken seriously, everyone sobers up and he gets protected and most likely gets custody of the children.
Initially, they will try to silence him, but as long as he has an attorney, they will usually jump the shark and settle case once they sober up. Most attorneys only go to trial once every 5 years, unless they have criminal experience, or were a military jag attorney.
The most important thing is to paint this as a DV against a disabled person, not a MRA/MGTOW fighting a woman, as this narrative is a lot easier get traction. DV against a disabled person makes the perpetrator, even if a woman, look like a complete asshole and is a lot harder to defend against.
Those are my initial opinions.
Every woman is a slut, if you catch her on the right day.
You open the door and walk out. He’s not ready for that and they’re feeding off each other.
It’s one of those fked up relationships that if you try and help …. they’ll both turn on you.
He just has to open the door and walk out.
Hell he could even plan it over time ….. but …. he’s still trying to reason with the unreasonable.
Do nothing ….. it won’t work coz they’re both screwed up.
Call the cops and get shelter at the station for yourself and your kids. Then you need to get this bitch arrested for a good 40 years for this and you need to work at getting your record expunged. That should be possible with this confession. Then NEVER get into a relationship again. Sorry, but this is a real cluster f~~~. Even though you’ve done nothing wrong, this will occupy the next 10 years of your life. You’ll never get financial compensation for all this. It will take years off your life. But at least you’ll be free of this bitch and she’ll pay for her crimes. Maybe you can write a book and make some money from this. Maybe you can change the way the world sees women. Maybe some good can come from this. It’s all up to you.
His survival is at stake, and so is the survival of his children. They need to get out; that is plain. Maybe DDJ’s plan is best, but he has no easy options. It is not plain what his disability is, but it is obvious that will only make things harder for him and his kids.
This is the stuff horror thriller novels are made of. Bunny Boiler Mommy traps family in a life of living Hell. She is a %$#@! psychic vampire.
Society asks MGTOWs: Why are you not making more tax-slaves?
7 years and he’s still telling her “i love you, I would do anything for you”.
YOU CAN LEAVE.
You CAN.
The problem with abuse is that it’s not that easy. The abuser gets in your head, tells you your worthless then breaks you physically and mentally until you are. The abused one may say they love them, but they’re scared and want out but don’t know how to get there. Even worse, the abuser always has good days and bad days. The good days remind the abused why they’re there but the bad ones lead to torn tendons and black eyes. It’s hell.
To the Man: get on disability so you don’t have to rely on your abuser while you get on your feet. DO NOT TELL HER YOU ARE DOING THIS. Make the money go into a small bank account that has NO card attached and make sure you do not get mails about it at your home and that you don’t visit the bank online. Any bank stuff at home WILL get found out so don’t leave any around! Go to the bank in person only and walk if you have to. Let the money accumulate for a month so you have starter money.
After a month, when she leaves the house, grab your bags, turn your cell phone OFF and get to the nearest abuse shelter. If she took the car, go by the bank and call a taxi or ride the bus so you can get there. No shelter? Try a church. They may try to turn you away at first, so show them your video then turn the phone OFF again. Do not go back home. Call the cops. Show them they video. Get a restraining order.
Use your month of starter money to get a cheap studio apartment or rent a room somewhere away from there. Get an internet connection so you can finally do banking, pay bills, and handle your own stuff from home. Get a cheap laptop or desktop to go online for support and to get things done. Libraries also have free computers if you can’t find a junker at a pawn shop for under $100.
Be prepared: she will use the phone with or without the restraining order to try to get you then she will turn the phone off. Do not answer ANY calls from the phone: assume she is calling you from another number or is having others contact you. Toss the phone in a sock drawer with the battery pulled out for two months while this happens. Do NOT contact her! After two months you can check your messages and use them in court to further prove she’s psycho.
Take her to court- file for divorce and to get her out of your life. Keep that video and any creepy phone calls as evidence. Don’t turn back.
The real world is scary, but it’s less scary than having your body broken while being told you are worthless over and over again. You can get out. If you don’t, she will kill you.
Beauty fades, dumb is forever.
i would tell him to keep gathering evidence and report her to the cops.
I bathe in the tears of single moms.
Anonymous29Stockholm syndrome coupled with a sprinkling of masochist tendencies blurring his mind.
F~~~ off from her and start living again.
I don’t believe in Stockholm syndrome. It is an excuse to enable your abuser due to lack of emotional strength. It is his fault and only his fault. You can’t change anybody but yourself. The laws mean he loses the kids. Deal with it.
If you stay when you are being abused it is your fault. The door is right there, use it. It’s just that simple.
Women have manufactured the concept of “the abused cannot leave as they are brainwashed”.
Bulls~~~. If he is being abused leave. If he doesn’t he is complicit in his own abuse. He is a masochist and should face it and accept it and stop whining like a little bitch.
#icethemout; Remember Thomas Ball. He died for your children.
Anonymous25Here’s the steps he needs to take immediately:
1) google and see if there is a male domestic violence charity in his area (there are some organisations that help and the issue is becoming more recognised). If there is one he needs to call them and speak to them straight away and try and get in a shelter or have her removed from the house with an injunction (if the police wont do it). Get details from a firm of solicitors that understand the needs to male domestic abuse victims from them. If he can’t then at least go and see a solicitor straight away and chose a man.
2) Phone the police immediately and report the abuse and make sure he gets a reference number. Keep chasing them up until they do something.
3) Go see a solicitor about getting an injunction against her. If he can get an injunction and have her removed from the house then ideally that’s what he wants. Keep recording everything. Write up transcripts that he can hand to the court of what was said.
4) keep a diary of the abuse and important facts and do this every day. it needs to be a hard bound paper journal so that they cant say you just ripped pages out of. write in it every day even if it’s just to say nothing major happened. Keep it somewhere you can get to if you need to get out of the house quickly.
5) keep important documents like your ID and passports and the children’s passports / birth certificates somewhere safe where he can get to important documents he needs quickly if he has to leave in a hurry.
You need all this logged with the police so they are aware in case she tries to make false allegations.
He needs to get out of that situation as quickly as possible, her abuse is only going to get worse.
How can he take care of two baby girls and not be able to live?
Can someone explain that to me?
Don't let them Blame, Shame or Tame you!
Give 'em NOTHING, not even an answer!
#GenderSegragationNow!He is on disability and feels helpless against this woman he’s impregnated. If he calls for help no one will believe except maybe close friends which I doubt he has at this point considering g how much control his wife has over his life. This is complicated. The children are the primary stakeholders and will suffer if he just dips. I wouldn’t wish this on anybody. He needs to buy a cheap camera and record everything. Once a few events are on video the kids will be his and the money will be too and he can peace our of thst hellhole. I wish him the best. Damn.
I have discovered a truly remarkable list of reasons why women are not necessary for a happy life, but alas this margin is too small to contain it.
I could only listen to this up to 1:47, but I would tell him 1) Get an attorney 2) Get some video cameras with audio that record to cloud storage.
He needs to plan out his escape with the girls and coordinate it with getting a restraining order. He can work out the timing of it with his attorney.
Anonymous29I don’t believe in Stockholm syndrome. It is an excuse to enable your abuser due to lack of emotional strength. It is his fault and only his fault. You can’t change anybody but yourself. The laws mean he loses the kids. Deal with it. If you stay when you are being abused it is your fault. The door is right there, use it. It’s just that simple. Women have manufactured the concept of “the abused cannot leave as they are brainwashed”. Bulls~~~. If he is being abused leave. If he doesn’t he is complicit in his own abuse. He is a masochist and should face it and accept it and stop whining like a little bitch.
Syndrome or no syndrome, the point is moot.
You on other hand are being direct to the point and on some level even kind. I on the other hand have very little tolerance for people in that situation because there is a very clear cut option. Leave the bitch and everything behind, for good and never ever look back. That’s the best I can do otherwise there would be nothing but filth coming out of my mouth.
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