What should I do??!! Please help.

[Blue SkiesParticipant 15665]

Dear Mgtow Brothers,

I’m in a tough situation right now. My parents bother me every other week with tough questions regarding dating, and marriage. They want me to be a white knight so badly.

I have already told them I do not want to get married but they won’t stop bothering me about it. They think I’m weird for not being a white knight. I cannot move to a different city because I have a good job right now which I don’t want to quit.

My parents are driving me nuts. If my friends were like this, I could get rid of them. I can’t get rid of my parents.

What should I tell them? What should I do? I prefer not to treat them like s~~~ because they raised me well, and sacrificed lots for me.

Thanks in advance,
$aver

MGTOW is not a movement, it is a way of life.

[guiParticipant 825]

Well, I think you should try to always change the topic of conversation. Say something like: I have to take care of some things first before I have time to worry about such matters. Keep calm and someday they will give up.

Pity and contempt are siblings. You only feel pity for those you consider weak.

[Anonymous 42]

Tell them modern men have two choices, 1. stand in front of the cannon of marriage, where 70% of women spark the touch hole, or 2. Live a happy life without a big hole in your chest facing the misery those 70% are forced to endure. They don’t realize they’re asking you to hold a loaded gun to your head and fire, especially knowing most the chambers have bullets!
Tell them you won’t peruse anything that rewards you with a “life time” of endless misery!

[PacifistParticipant 143]

There are 2 basic paths to use.

Every time they ask keep your answers short 1-3 words and change the subject. This can be seen as cold and harsh but reduces your parents ability to engage you in a discussion or argument. Keeping your responses to variations of “No” will frustrate them but they will ask less and less often.

Or you can sit down/take a long walk with them and explain or discuss your choice. This should only be used if your parents are capable of having reasonable discussions without being overly emotional. Make sure you have your ducks in a row before hand. Because they’ll feel that you’re challenging everything they believe including their own marriage. They’ll also be fighting for what they believe is the happiness of their son. It’s a much harder path.

The videos online are helpful but only if someone is ready to accept that information. Only you can judge if your parents would benefit from them.

Good luck and maintain an even keel. You already know this but don’t give an inch. If they try to set you up on a date or something, if you accept even once they will see hope and push even harder trying to grind down your resistance.

[Silverstone the SecondParticipant]

Subvert it.
ARE YOU SEEING SOMEONE?
-Yes, even if you’re not
WHY HAVEN’T I MET THEM
-Right now, it’s casual, I don’t want you to meet them until I know “they’re the one”

If you give some more examples of what they ask, I can give more specific advice. And remember, you can take anyone out of your life. People say to me: “How can you not talk to your mother?! She’s your mother!”

Well, I don’t because she is the one who gave birth to me, and she treated me like s~~~. No one was around asking her “How can you treat your son that way? He’s your son!” The fact that we are biologically related means nothing. If you treat me decent I’ll reciprocate, if not I’ll reciprocate.

Feminism is a movement where opinions are presented as facts and emotions are presented as evidence.

[Blue SkiesParticipant 15665]

Silverstone the Second wrote:

If you give some more examples of what they ask, I can give more specific advice.

here’s specific questions and stuff they tell me.

You should go out, and meet women more often.

You should get a girlfriend.

When are you getting married.

It’s ok to take risks.

Not all women are crazy, just find yourself a normal girl.

MGTOW is not a movement, it is a way of life.

[OhnoParticipant 668]

I assume your parents dont have any grandchildren yet?

Probably that is all they want, the reproductive instinct is very strong, stronger than the survival instinct even.

[Blue SkiesParticipant 15665]

Ohno wrote:

I assume your parents dont have any grandchildren yet?

that is correct….

I also told them several times that I do not want to have kids in the future.

MGTOW is not a movement, it is a way of life.

[RoyDalParticipant]

I use the monosyllabic grunt and shoulder shrug answer. When that doesn’t work, I tell them I haven’t found “Miss Right” yet.

They remember my blue pill days, so I allow them to believe I actually am looking, which I am not. I am not lying, but I am not telling the whole truth either.

Society asks MGTOWs: Why are you not making more tax-slaves?

[QuietlyquietlyParticipant 728]

Hey Saver,

For some parents, seeing their child/children continue the family is very important. Asian families quite often have a stronger tradition like this, so it can be a huge shock to the parents when their westernized son does not want to do as they say.

Stick to your guns. You may be able to delay by saying you want to be really well set up first – good career, own your own house, stocks, shares, rental property (keep adding to the list!). Otherwise you may have to have the “I’m gay” talk with them, and burst their bubble about you ever marrying.

[KeymasterKeymaster]

This is perfectly normal.

Thankfully my brother gave them the grandchildren they wanted so the pressure was off…. and I endured this s~~~ forever. Then one day, about 6 or 7 years ago…… my Mom and I were having chinese take-out and she said “you would make a terrible husband”.

…. to which I replied “well if by husband you mean a hen-pecked, docile & controlled, neutered little house pet who never questions anything, quietly pays for everything and never pesters his queen for sex… then you’re probably right! THANKS!”.

She was trying to jab…. but I took it as a compliment, and even SHE laughed.

Caught.

Then I happened to see the film “My Fair Lady” (best picture 1964) and the song “let a woman in your life” struck me with the most perfect lyrics. So I memorized them, and the next time the subject came up I recited the whole thing like a poem.

I was at my brothers house and 8 of us were having dinner. his wife starts on about “so when are you gonna grow up and get married?”. The kids were there, so I couldn’t say “marriage is for gays” or some other bomb to shut her up, so I blew everyone’s mind and they all listened in amazement.

Nobody knew where it came from. They didn’t recognize it… except my mom.
My mom asked “WHATS THAT FROM???”

“My Fair Lady. Best picture. 1964. It won 11 Oscars for a reason.”.

….. and then I quietly enjoyed my desert — while my sister-in-law was burning holes through me with her eyes. Inside, I was laughing my head off.

If you keep doing what you've always done... you're gonna keep getting what you always got.

[OhnoParticipant 668]

Blue Skies wrote:

I also told them several times that I do not want to have kids in the future.

Because there are good reasons to not have kids, more than not wanting to have kids, right?

The difference between a human and an animal brain is that our part of the brain that can make rational choices ( the neo cortex part and so ) is way bigger in proportion to the part of the brain responsible for instincts. You probably know there are species, where the male gets killed by the female after procreation, but even then their brain is designed in a manner that they will procreate anyways.
Humans have this part of brain also, but its way smaller in comparison.

Thats why you can make a rational choice to not have kids, because too many arguments against it.
But from your parents perspective as grandparents this doesnt matter, because you are the one raising and being responsible, they only get the goodies when you have a kid.

So I doubt you can convince them by arguments, because they just want to have grandchildren too much and dont see the problems.

I would love to have a kid, so i feel the instinct as well, but i dont do it, because so much speaking against it.
Luckily my sister has given my parents a granddaughter and they are happy now and are leaving me alone with questions about women.

[Mellow midnightsParticipant 19]

For one bro, there is no way you would be treating them like s~~~ by simply standing up for your right to not get married or allow yourself to become a white knight. I’ve learned with family that getting into conversations about marriage or relationships, especially with women, that i find myself becoming easily irritated and upset when i start hearing the “not all women are like this or like that” lines. These things can be avoided, but it takes alot of self discipline to know when its time to dismiss myself from a conversation that i know will involve shaming or judging men. Usually in a family, a man works or goes to school to be successful and live his dreams, but yet is expected to share what he has earned by getting married or, being in a relationship, it’s all socially acceptable. Those who say kiss my ass are often called “selfish” or “woman haters” or “immature”, but it doesn’t matter what anybody thinks of you, what matters is what you know of yourself.

[Silverstone the SecondParticipant]

Blue Skies wrote:

here’s specific questions and stuff they tell me.

You should go out, and meet women more often.

You should get a girlfriend.

When are you getting married.

It’s ok to take risks.

Not all women are crazy, just find yourself a normal girl.

1. I go out all the time, there just aren’t that many girls looking to settle down. Most girls are too busy with their careers to look for a serious relationship. Alternatively, there’s just no time. Every time I make plans with [Insert girls name here] something always comes up with either her work or my work.
2. I’m looking around, and have talked to quite a few girls, but there aren’t any that are wife material. I’ll bring my girlfriend around when I find one that’s worth bringing around.
3. I plan on getting married soon, right after {insert arbitrary thing]. Once I buy a house, once I get debt payed off, once I get a new car, once I can find a woman who believes in marriage. The last line is a load of s~~~, but make it sound like women don’t want to get married, or that women are waiting later and later in life to get married, and so are men. It’s not like back in your parents day, when you got married at 18 to your high school sweet heart. Times have changed, mom.
4. Of course it’s ok to take risks, Speaking of which, I’m getting a motorcycle. What do you think of that? Oh? People die on those things all the time? But I thought you said it was okay to take risks.
5. I just want to find a nice girl, no all women aren’t crazy. The problem is, all the nice girls are taken.

NOTE
I don’t really believe a lot of this s~~~, but it’s for your parents. Some people, especially older folks, are stuck in their ways, and you’re not trying to convince them that MGTOW is logical, because you never will. Just get them off your back, lie if you have to, because honesty won’t do anything in this situation.

Feminism is a movement where opinions are presented as facts and emotions are presented as evidence.

[Total LeeParticipant 1573]

You know what’s up. That’s all that matters. I wouldn’t talk red pill with them because it never works. Treat it like a comedy show. What are the going to do? Put a gun to your head?

I just don’t see whats in it for me. It benefits the wife and kids but there is no benefit for you. You know this already. I would tell them until you meet a woman you think is marriage material the conversation is stupid. Tell them you’re not even thinking about it, and you’re definitely not talking about marriage and children to someone you’ve never met. That’s crazy.

Who talks about marriage and children with a ghost that doesn’t exist? Until you like a girl enough and bring her over for dinner or events for at least a year or two, it’s a dumb topic. Refuse to talk about until then and you’re off the hook.

[Silverstone the SecondParticipant]

Ohno wrote:

I assume your parents dont have any grandchildren yet?

Probably that is all they want, the reproductive instinct is very strong, stronger than the survival instinct even.

Holy s~~~, very good observation. usually the mother most of all. They just want you to give her grand kids. You are serving HER, by getting married. She doesn’t give a s~~~ about what kind of woman you marry or have kids with, she just wants grand kids. She thinks you OWE her grandkids, and you don’t

Feminism is a movement where opinions are presented as facts and emotions are presented as evidence.

[Soldier-MedicParticipant 2566]

Anonymous wrote:

Tell them modern men have two choices, 1. stand in front of the cannon of marriage, where 70% of women spark the touch hole, or 2. Live a happy life without a big hole in your chest facing the misery those 70% are forced to endure. They don’t realize they’re asking you to hold a loaded gun to your head and fire, especially knowing most the chambers have bullets!
Tell them you won’t peruse anything that rewards you with a “life time” of endless misery!

This is the best suggestion that I can think of. It is truthful and accurate.

If they reply NAWALT then my response would be. I will believe it only after the administration of a lie detector test, a credit report, and a prenup. She also has to make as much or more than you do.

I think that this will shut down most of the conversation.

"I asked you a question. I didn't ask you to repeat what the voices in you head are telling you" ~ Me. ........Yes I'm still angry.

[TheroniusParticipant 975]

It can be hard to convince an older generation that things have changed so much for the worst. To many married folk, anyone not married is seen as unstable and likely to be drunk, promiscuous, or just lonely and miserable. I’d just make some s~~~ up about how you want to wait because you are too busy right now trying to become financially secure, and if it doesn’t ever happen, c’est la vie! After all, most people are waiting until they are older to get married these days. I read it in USA today.
It is unlikely that you will really convince them that marriage is a bad idea though. It’s the only way they know.
For me it was easier. I could simply gesture around at the ruins of my parents’ marriage and those of most of my siblings, and ask if that was really what they wanted for me.
My dear mother, bless her heart, still wonders if I will ever settle down and have a family. She is having a hard time realizing that I am 57 years old, and very unlikely to do that. She still believes in the dream.

"I am is reportedly the shortest sentence in the English language. Could it be that I do is the longest sentence?" - George Carlin

[Anonymous 1]

Blue Skies wrote:

Dear Mgtow Brothers,

I’m in a tough situation right now. My parents bother me every other week with tough questions regarding dating, and marriage. They want me to be a white knight so badly.

I have already told them I do not want to get married but they won’t stop bothering me about it. They think I’m weird for not being a white knight. I cannot move to a different city because I have a good job right now which I don’t want to quit.

My parents are driving me nuts. If my friends were like this, I could get rid of them. I can’t get rid of my parents.

What should I tell them? What should I do? I prefer not to treat them like s~~~ because they raised me well, and sacrificed lots for me.

Thanks in advance,
$aver

Hello $aver,

Your situation is a little different than mines because your parents does not have grand-kids, so the pressure is on you. My bro is already married with a daughter. I am currently 27 and turning 28 pretty soon. For the past few weeks, my mom has been asking me the same questions. She even showed me a picture of someone daughter in Asia that she wants me to marry. I never really respond because if I do everything will come out and it is not in a good way for me. She then asked me, “you will be a bachelor forever”? I am lucky though because my father does not get involved in this sh*t at all. Asian mom is annoying when it comes to this. I am going to continue to ignore my mom for as long as possible. I really don’t know what to tell you. Good luck!

[Blue SkiesParticipant 15665]

Quietlyquietly wrote:

Otherwise you may have to have the “I’m gay” talk with them, and burst their bubble about you ever marrying.

ahahaha
I wouldn’t do this because it would cause me ten times more problems than I have now.

Maybe they want to see me dating more to prove I am not gay.

MGTOW is not a movement, it is a way of life.

[Author]

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