So, in the early months after this all transpired, any sort of glimpse into her (outwardly happy, at least) new life was extremely difficult to bear. In response, I did a few things to preserve some mental peace: I closed down my Fakebook account cold-turkey (never did use the other “social media” platforms); I set a goal of doing something enjoyable, or at least productive, every single day (finally managed to restore a vintage stereo receiver I’d been meaning to service for…. oh…. 9 years! And without anyone to harass me about “when’s this going to be done”, I’m making progress on some long-delayed household renovations); I made it clear to family members that I’d tolerate no discussion about my ex — no questions, no sympathy, no talk about “what a nice girl” they thought she used to be and that I’m not interested in attending weddings; and finally (this one took more time) I decided to accept that I can’t change what happened, but I CAN avoid that sort of pain and suffering in the future.
Thank you for sharing that WPL..I too had a lot of to do list but never got around to doing them because I was busy making my exwife happy…Now that I think about it, there is no one stopping me from slowly checking off my to do list…Perhaps my mind is still metaphorically caged by the “marriage” mentality…Its going to take a lot of red pills to free myself from the “responsibility” of marriage.
I think you actually DID need to hear that. It’s a bitter pill, but coming to the realization that she’s no longer your problem will be healing in the long run.
Thanks SoloMan…I didnt think of it that way. True that the event hurt, but it also shocked me from my complacency and ignited back my fury. Now I need to harness this fury to better myself…Because f~~~ them, its now my life…
I think an important takeaway from all these comments is there will be pain. It’s evident that it may continue for sometime but it does get easier.
As good men; once we commit, we try to make the best of any situation. It’s been ingrained into us to support a family at all costs from a very young age.
We want to create and build the best lives for ourselves, our ‘partner’ and our family. We will put their needs above our own and do what ever it takes to make things right.
When Cupcake takes off, it’s hard for us to let go…but part of the healing process demands that we cut them loose and go our own way. When there’s no reciprocation, it can be very confusing and hurtful.
No matter how far down the MGTOW road you are, there are always obstacles that people will throw in your way. But we are men and we will find a way to overcome them.
Let women be women.
You got this NT. Take this weekend for yourself then get back on track towards your goals.
Thanks Arcturis…You summed it up perfectly of what responsibility nice guys have to endure. And as you said, “But we are men and we will find a way to overcome them.” holds true now. Thank you for the support…
If she hasn’t secured a new wallet by time the wall punch’s her in the kooter, she will try to reverse monkey branch.
I know she will monkey branch back. An exgf just tried after 8 years. That is what I am afraid of. Its why I fervently hope to be able to heal quickly so that when she comes crawling back I can say NO…She is one individual that I opened myself to and showed my vulnerabilities…She knows the buttons to press and I hope to remap my buttons and destroy the white knight that I used to be.
The old me is already broken, I just need to get rid of the pieces before she comes back from the carousel and find pieces she can use as ammo to break me down again…
I stand with feet apart and let my balls hang free...Manginas dont have balls...See how they stand and sit at the whim of their masters...
NerdTunneler 1 year, 6 months ago.
