Phone call from daughter at boyfriends house.

[DBCooperParticipant 200]

Hey all. Kinda new to posting here, but you can read up on my story in introductions if you want. Quickly year out of divorce with 43% custody, the house, the dog, and financial freedom (minimal CS). Woot. Anyway, still struggling. We all know it wasn’t an easy ride. Really bumpy.

Question: What do you do when your daughter calls you at 1PM on a Sunday, and after small talk, she asks what I am doing. I say eating lunch. She says I have’t even had breakfast. They haven’t gone to the store yet. I say, who is “they”. Silence for a bit. Then she whispers “I am at mom’s boyfriends house. They don’t have any food and aren’t up yet.”

I basically did nothing, because I knew my daughter would just get in trouble for telling me. I want to say something but I know it won’t matter. I guess all I can do is make sure my daughter is fed and in a safe environment when she is with me. I guess I answered my own question, just needing some confirmation or opinions. I guess documenting would be good. I feel I have my guard down because things have been going good. I should not let them down.

Thanks.

P.S. I wanted to add that the ex c~~~ is not a drug addict, but she is an addict. And has personality disorder. But she does have a job, a rental house, and a car. She is a functioning BPD c~~~ in society and normally a good mother as best a BPD woman can be. Not that makes her any better, just maybe I am making too much of this.

[Anonymous 54]

Buy her a bunch of energy bars or something, so she can have a secret food stash.

I think your right not to say anything.
But its good ammo for later if you need it.

Said the Man with no kids.

[DBCooperParticipant 200]

Yeah, I am making too much of this. It just bugs me. Ammo for later if needed. Check.

[Oz-BlokeParticipant 3233]

Mother was probably hungover from getting her fill of new c~~~ last night. They get like that when back on the carousel. I feel for your daughter, but at least your ex is Chad’s headache now.

#ManOut

[Anonymous 54]

Oz-Bloke wrote:

Mother was probably hungover from getting her fill of new c~~~ last night. They get like that when back on the carousel. I feel for your daughter, but at least your ex is Chad’s headache now.

That ougtta cheer him up! Haha

[DBCooperParticipant 200]

Yeah, lol. It makes me feel good she’s getting some. I’ve got mine, no worries. I kinda figured it out when she finally left me alone. It’s all good.

[DBCooperParticipant 200]

And yeah, somebody else’s problem, amen.

[Anonymous 43]

Make a note, time, day, what was said. Journal everything you can. Your journal is evidence the c~~~ won’t have. Judge will accept your journal as better evidence…usually.

Talk to your lawyer. You can not interfere with the goings on over there, someone will nail you with harassment and stalking…voice of experience here. Start a paper trail. Courts love paper. Oh, im of mixed feelings sending the cops to do a welfare check. What you think is helpful, is probably seen as harassment.

There will be much that bugs you. Damn near all of it. There is not much you can do except observe and document.

someday, after dozens of incidents like this, a pattern of s~~~ behavior will emerge. Maybe the judge will figure it out.

[DBCooperParticipant 200]

Seriously though, I do worry about my daughter and where she is sleeping. The guy checks out, probably a nice guy. Poor sucker. Anyway, thanks for the comments, almost spit out my beer.

[Anonymous 43]

I am not a lawyer, not dispensing legal advice here. Passing on what I was told. When my ex smacked my daughter around in public at an aquarium, and she called me from inside a locked closet crying, there was little I could do except talk her down. The lawyer told me that until blood is spilled or bones were broken…an ER visit with pictures, x-rays, a paper trail, the judge is going to dismiss my complaint as he said, she said. Our kids never went to family court for any reason…too traumatizing for the children… oh pulease. Like daddy getting punted by the cops and some stranger and his two womb turds moving in three days later isn’t traumatizing?

[DBCooperParticipant 200]

Yeah, I mean it is probably that she was ignoring our daughter cause she was trying to get some sucker to admire her new hindu tattoo. Oh I never mentioned she is in her second cult. This time a yoga cult. First time a what you call LGAT. Large Group Awareness Trainig. Crazy s~~~. Women. lol. Gullable as s~~~e.

[DocParticipant]

DBCooper wrote:

Yeah, I am making too much of this. It just bugs me. Ammo for later if needed. Check.

If it helps to vent here then I can’t see a problem.
You may even get some sound advice.

We all vent here at some point. At least it shows you care about your daughter.

The object of life is not to be on the side of the majority, but to escape, finding oneself in the ranks of the insane. Marcus Aurelius

[Oz-BlokeParticipant 3233]

Anonymous wrote:

That ougtta cheer him up! Haha

Apologies if that came off blunt Dirtbikes MM. Divorce-rape does that to a man. Just bugs me when mothers neglect their children when they are riding a new fleshpipe. A mate’s daughter would drop McDonalds junk food off to her sons and drive off to ride the latest Chad and thought that was ‘parenting’.

#ManOut

[NerdTunnelerParticipant]

Guide your kid and teach her to be responsible for her life…Its hard because of AWALT but its the only way…Good luck and welcome…

PS…Ghost the ex…stop following her on social media or anything…Its going to hinder your growing…Just my 2 cents…

I stand with feet apart and let my balls hang free...Manginas dont have balls...See how they stand and sit at the whim of their masters...

[Truthseeker82Participant 6406]

More proof that the family court system is a travesty of justice. Your ex bitch showing no signs of putting your daughter first – yet the system says she can do no wrong. The only advice I have is to keep being accessible to her at least to listen – even if you can do nothing. Know she will grow up and no matter what the ex c~~~ does – she will become her own person.

[MonkParticipant 16978]

DBCooper wrote:

She says I have’t even had breakfast. They haven’t gone to the store yet. I say, who is “they”. Silence for a bit. Then she whispers “I am at mom’s boyfriends house. They don’t have any food and aren’t up yet.”

This bodes ill for the future.

I guess documenting would be good.

Yes. Document everything.

P.S. I wanted to add that the ex c~~~ is not a drug addict, but she is an addict. And has personality disorder.

She’s got your child, she’s a nutjob and she’s shacked up with chad …

… just maybe I am making too much of this.

… so no, you are NOT making too much of this. Start planning to get your child out.

And don’t think she’s done with you, either. Once she’s bored with chad and can’t monkey branch any more, you will be back in the crosshairs.

[JustAnotherGuyParticipant]

Document it. If you’re able, start recording conversations with your daughter, especially when you get moments like this where things have most definitely gone awry. Collect evidence.

If you reach a point where you have a substantial volume of evidence and can demonstrate a pattern of bad faith and behavior on the part of the former cupcake, you might be able to legally assert some parental authority. I’m a programmer, not a lawyer. Keep that in mind.

Also, as an idea to put a patch on issues…if this happens again, get a delivery address and order a personal pizza. Or buy a prepaid debit card so she can do it herself. When you transfer custody, send her off with a small bug-out bag of rations–trail mix, granola, bags of nuts. Anything that she can hide in a backpack. A little bit of prepping here will let you teach her some survival skills and self-reliance even when you’re not exactly around.

Hate to say it, but you have to be somewhat passive and bide your time.

Cupcakes are Cold. MGTOW is Absolute Zero.
“Let us wait a little; when your enemy is executing a false movement, never interrupt him” –Napoleon Bonaparte, 1805

[DorkShitParticipant 4353]

Understand the boundary.

You have no authority over that situation.

No one cares, until the first responder arrives.

No one exists to help you, but you.

You have to wait.

Prepare. Prepare for the day when you have authority. That means, do not enter into another relationship. Compounds the problem.

Focus. Concentrate. Plan. Be prepared.

Good luck.

Peace brothers

[AwakenedParticipant 35200]

DBCooper wrote:

Seriously though, I do worry about my daughter and where she is sleeping.

Is it possible to talk your EX and offer to have your daughter stay with you on those nights she’s entertaining her new victim ?

In a World of Justin Beibers Be a Johnny Cash

[OldBillParticipant]

DBCooper wrote:

Women. lol. Gullable as s~~~e.

And yet you not only married her, you knocked her up too.

Think about that for a second or three.

Anyway, as the others have said, there’s nothing you can do except be prepared for hundreds of similar calls until your daughter grows and moves out.

Do not date. Do not impregnate. Do not co-habitate. Above all, do not marry. Reclaim and never again surrender your personal sovereignty.

[Author]

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