Home › Forums › MGTOW Central › Nice Guy Syndrome
This topic contains 68 replies, has 25 voices, and was last updated by 
Anonymous 1 year, 9 months ago.
- AuthorPosts
Since the van killings in Toronto, I’ve seen people complaining about MRA’s, incels, redpill, (funny how they lump them all together when they’re very different), and my personal favorite, Nice Guy Syndrome.
That last one in particular has always bothered me. Every definition of it I see blames the man or makes him out to be a horrible, ugly human being (doesn’t treating him like that sort of prove him right?- but that’s besides the point). I find it extremely strange, because even on websites supposedly devoted to men, men’s improvement sites, they also blame the man and it’s essentially an insult.
But really, why is it such an unreasonable thing to expect some kind of return for spending time, money, and effort? I don’t blame the guys at all that suffer from this, they’re operating under the belief that if they’re generous, someone will be generous in return- though I do think they should redpill.
I dunno where I’m going with this. I think I’m just disgusted with all the hate towards straight men lately.
I personally am not disgusted nor angry about all the hatred projected towards men by society. I am not surprised nor do I want to go out of my own way to try and change the system, however I can change they way I see society such that I do not run into unexpected surprises (example, thinking that marriage will bring me peace).
The reality of society is that men are expected to be nothing but slaves. Men are NOT allowed to even enjoy themselves, not even one bit. A slave who starts to think for himself is considered to be a threat to society.
I choose to opt out and just watch carefully.
A tranquil mind is neither happy nor sad, it is uninfluenced by external conditions.
I don’t follow. Have another one.
Peace is > piece.
Had to look into this quickly given the blanketing of all other men who are not on the protected spieces list.
Of course when I want bulls~~~ I look to some of the wost sources, so here’s what I found in the womanosphere – https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/opinion-drimonis-toronto-attack-sexism-terrorism_us_5ae3deb2e4b02baed1ba618f
Now they are comparing incels to isis, someone send us a giant meteor.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_terrorist_incidents_linked_to_ISIL
Unstable guy goes on a killing rampage hiding behind the banner of Incel. The only similarities I see are Isis / Incel start with the same letter.
"Society is to blame" Denton
Had to look into this quickly given the blanketing of all other men who are not on the protected spieces list.
Of course when I want bulls~~~ I look to some of the wost sources, so here’s what I found in the womanosphere – https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/opinion-drimonis-toronto-attack-sexism-terrorism_us_5ae3deb2e4b02baed1ba618f
Now they are comparing incels to isis, someone send us a giant meteor.
Yup. No surprise.
MGTOWs will, or have been, labelled as terrorists. Guilt by association. Even saying “no” to a woman who wants to get married can land a man in hot water and be publicly shamed.
A tranquil mind is neither happy nor sad, it is uninfluenced by external conditions.
I think people don’t understand that men arrive to the MGTOW in 1 of several ways.
Lots of us didn’t have alot of luck with the sheela’s and evolved to live our lives happily unattached and single. Of course xbox, porn, hookers, dirty holidays, hookup apps, soften the blow for living this lifestyle.
I was mgtow when in my twenties I was invisible to women, although my social circle was very small, and the night life here basically sucks ass.
Now in my forties I’m thankful that I didn’t end up in a boring relationship with some random, as I would have given everything even if I was not happy.
Alot of people don’t see the reason for the red pill RAGE, and that mostly comes from those men who have wasted years of their lives starting families, raising kids, only to be served a divorce letter, lose access to their children, lose the house, pay alimony, see the mrs run off with some fling like she is a teenager, and one big charade set in motion by the evil mastermind behind the plot his f~~~ing wife who was f~~~ing him over from day 1. This is backed up by the hundreds of stories in the intro section, and why alot of the guys here are so wary of women.
Places like this give these guys a chance to get their lives back on track, to deal with the depression and anger, to vent and see that they are not alone even though they often have noone who cares about them.
Steel sharpens steel.
"Society is to blame" Denton
‘Nice guys” are often f’n idiots who don’t know better yet. I’m separated and my wife isn’t some horrid monster, although I understand a lot of guys have been burned big-time. I picked her and am dealing with the result, for better or worse. Must say though, I surely love going my own way these past few years!! Lots more freedom and contentment.
We just don't realize life's most significant events while they're happening. Back then, I thought, "Well, there'll be other days". I didn't realize that that was the only day. - "Moonlight" Graham
For a while I was a bit of a nice guy, after that I sort of understood some of the criticism, but now I’m back to thinking it’s some projection and shame being placed on what would have been normal behavior for guys in the past.
The most sound argument I’d seen was that it removes autonomy from the female, the male assuming that you punch your nice guy tickets and you get the prize. I can see that, but at the same time it is still a misrepresentation, just as always with feminists.
As history has shown, women do not have much accountability regardless of whether men have tried to hold them to it or let them wander free. Most never mature past their teens in terms of mentality, so it has always fallen to men to take care of them – it makes it all the more hilarious when they claim they don’t want their boyfriends to be children, and then turn around and call them “Daddy”.
Just a guess here but I’d bet money that the reasoning behind this is because a lot of betas compensate with gifts and such in order to compete with Chad. Women have effectively killed the old market of trading goods for pussy in order to do whatever they feel like without consequence.
"I have the fury of my own momentum." "With this ring I thee wed. Fire walk with me."
I imagine a time where I see a bunch of Leftwing c~~~s getting their throats slit by Islamicists. Maybe a few feminists, 31-gender freaks, SJW’s etc.
I’m underground, in my concrete bunker, with its underground well, biocomposting toilet, and 4-year supply of food stacked against the wall, watching from a small periscope, with my rifles and ammo stacked on another wall, eating popcorn, not giving a f~~~, nor one round of ammo to save one stupid, useless c~~~.
F~~~ being a sheep dog. I hope the wolves kill all the sheep.
All my life I've had doubts about who I am, where I belonged. Now I'm like the arrow that springs from the bow. No hesitation, no doubts. The path is clear. And what are you? Alive. Everything else is negotiable. Women have rights; men have responsibilities; MGTOW have freedom. Marriage is for chumps. If someone stands in the way of true justice, you simply walk up behind them and stab them in the heart-R'as al Ghul.
For a while I was a bit of a nice guy, after that I sort of understood some of the criticism, but now I’m back to thinking it’s some projection and shame being placed on what would have been normal behavior for guys in the past.
The most sound argument I’d seen was that it removes autonomy from the female, the male assuming that you punch your nice guy tickets and you get the prize. I can see that, but at the same time it is still a misrepresentation, just as always with feminists.
There is an underlying assumption to all of this: that a “nice guy” is only being a “nice guy” to get laid. Ask most women and they think that everything a guy does is to get laid. Wear nice clothes, drive a nice car, get a good career, it’s all to get laid. Be an asshole, a nice guy, whatever, all to get laid.
I’m a nice guy because I’m a nice guy. Not to get in anyone’s pants. Women in general can’t seem to get past thinking about their vagina all day long. Here’s a hint Judy, you are the one thinking about your vagina all day long, not me.
But I guess when the only tool you have is a hammer everything around you looks like a nail…
Order the good wine
I used to be such a sweet, sweet thing
‘Til they got a hold of me
I opened doors for little old ladies
I helped the blind to see
I got no friends cause they read the papers
They can’t be seen
with me
and I’m gettin’ real shot down
And I’m feeling meanNo more Mister Nice Guy
No more Mister Clean
No more Mister Nice Guy
They say he’s sick, he’s obsceneHow can a woman be expected to be happy with a man who insists on treating her as if she were a perfectly normal human being.
Anonymous18Women are extremely solipsistic.
Nice Guy Syndrome can be broken down by a glitch in their mainframe. Women in their youth spin plates (natural), and doing so they lie and manipulate (cheating is a given).
When they are confronted by a man who is upstanding and virtuous her own moral deficiencies are put in limelight. And she starts hating on nice guys.
Like the great philosopher Alan Watts said: When we realize that ‘god’ sees and hears everything we say or do, we become uncomfortable with the idea. So instead we become agnostics or atheists, and doing so we become jaded because we have refused to accept ourselves for we are all the god’. Something along the lines.
Women in general can’t seem to get past thinking about their vagina all day long. Here’s a hint Judy, you are the one thinking about your vagina all day long, not me.
But I guess when the only tool you have is a hammer everything around you looks like a nail…
Its like the Saudis and the only thing they have to offer is oil. The only thing women have to offer is pussy.
All my life I've had doubts about who I am, where I belonged. Now I'm like the arrow that springs from the bow. No hesitation, no doubts. The path is clear. And what are you? Alive. Everything else is negotiable. Women have rights; men have responsibilities; MGTOW have freedom. Marriage is for chumps. If someone stands in the way of true justice, you simply walk up behind them and stab them in the heart-R'as al Ghul.
But really, why is it such an unreasonable thing to expect some kind of return for spending time, money, and effort? I don’t blame the guys at all that suffer from this,
Sorry, but that’s just crap. You can’t expect a darn thing from a woman. If you want a guarantee, get a stripper or prostitute. Yes, time/money/effort might result in getting something in return from a woman, but the idea that it’s a guarantee is just stupid. If a guy wants to spend on a woman in hopes of getting a return, and he gets none, he’s an idiot to keep spending.
Putting it a different way, if a woman dates a man for 6 months, does he now owe her something? What about a year, does he owe her cohabitation and a child? Hell no.
I get that unmet expectations are disappointing, but that doesn’t change the facts. And yes women can promise or lead a man on to believe returns are probable, but that still doesn’t mean you’re due anything. It’s a much happier life to understand risks instead of blinding thinking your due s~~~ that you’re not.
And disappointment in unmet expectations is certainly not an excuse for violence, anymore than a disgruntled ex-girl friend can key your car.
Ok. Then do it.
Anonymous38But really, why is it such an unreasonable thing to expect some kind of return for spending time, money, and effort?
It’s not unreasonable, however it’s ignoring the fact that women are now holding the cards in the dating arena. As Narwhal alludes to, it’s not accepting of reality. When you fully accept reality you have the choice of dealing with women but having a FULL understanding of Briffault’s law and hypergamy (and in doing so understand the golden rule does not apply), or going monk. There’s no other way that works in a man’s favour.
But really, why is it such an unreasonable thing to expect some kind of return for spending time, money, and effort?
Yes it is, you blue pilled simp. No one, be they man or woman, owes you anything.
Life isn’t a series of business transactions.
Do not date. Do not impregnate. Do not co-habitate. Above all, do not marry. Reclaim and never again surrender your personal sovereignty.
Anonymous3This is going to be a long post because I have been fighting that “nice guy” problem. I found out that it is a pretty complicated issue, with several layers of psychology, sociology and spirituality.
Let start by the end, because many of us try to “do good deeds” on this earth, and avoid doing bad things. If it is not by religious values, at least there is a belief in an afterlife. In that sense one would thing being a “good guy” is the only right thing to do.If we were in 1930 pointing a gun at Hitler, would we shoot? If we kill him, we commit a mortal sin. If we don’t kill him we are responsible by millions of deaths.
As if this question is not hard enough, we might complicate the issue by saying that we know what Hitler did, but in 1930 he didn’t do anything. One would have to be “inspired” by God itself to know the future and act on it. But are we sure its God speaking or something else?
Worst, even if we know that our soul is condemned by killing the man, are we not sacrificing ourselves for other a “noble goal”? Therefore, how can the soul be condemned?If we are to analyze the psychology of the issue, there is always self-interest in being a “good guy”. Either by religious reasons (we want to “save our soul”), by hedonistic reasons (we want to get sex) or social reasons (how we want to be seen by others).
Sure, there are socially accepted “good actions” and religious dogmatic law of selfishness and charity…
But as Antonhy De Mello says:THE MASQUERADE OF CHARITY
Charity is really self-interest masquerading under the form of altruism. You say that it is very difficult to accept that there may be times when you are not honest to goodness really trying to be loving or trustful. Let me simplify it. Let’s make it as simple as possible. Let’s even make it as blunt and extreme as possible, at least to begin with.
There are two types of selfishness. The first type is the one where I give myself the pleasure of pleasing myself. That’s what we generally call self-centeredness.
The second is when I give myself the pleasure of pleasing others. That would be a more refined kind of selfishness.
The first one is very obvious, but the second one is hidden, very hidden, and for that reason more dangerous, because we get to feel that we’re really great. But maybe we’re not all that great after all.
AWARENESS
ANTHONY DE MELLO, S.J.The sociological analysis is even worst. This society is build upon a set of behaviors designed for safety and productivity. Refrain to use violence, being honest, truthful, helping each-other… These are things that we expect from others by default.
But, when everyone plays by the same rules it pays being the one that doesn’t follow the rules.
As Esther Vilar says:FOR MOST MEN all that remains of the religious faith of childhood are a few conditioned behavioral reflexes, such as a love of truth, the enjoyment of honest, hard work, or a pleasure in non-freedom. From the moral point of view, everyone should have the right to lie. It helps us to stave off society’s often too bold attempts to supervise us and thus minimize our own personal fight for existence. The disadvantage of lying is that if everyone does it, it loses its usefulness. If anyone is gullible enough to believe something that is not true, he must himself love the truth and assume a similar love in others. Consequently, a lie becomes a luxury: it has rarity value. The rarity value has to be maintained by incessant denigration, in the interest of liars. Therefore, it is very important that women teach men love of truth: for only if he loves truth, is she able to afford the luxury of lying. For contemporary society to survive at all, men must believe in truth. They do the work, and no practical, i.e., logical, system can function on lies. In the highly developed system of contemporary society, where all labor is divided, each man must be able to work with, and rely on, the other. If men were to take to lying when the moment seemed opportune, say in matters such as train schedules, freighters’ capacities, or the amount of fuel left in an airplane’s tank, the effect on our commercial system would be disastrous. Within a very short time there would be complete chaos. Women, however, can lie with a clear conscience. They are not involved in the process of work, so their lies will harm only one person – usually the husband. And, if it is not discovered, it is not a lie at all – it is “feminine guile.”
Esther Vilar
The Manipulated ManSo, summing up the “good guy” syndrome: it is a result of harmful conditioning on several layers of our psyche.
We should strive for OUR OWN SELF-INTEREST. It is actually what we are doing anyway, but using the wrong ideas and achieving the opposite effect!
So, let us be honest to ourselves, and totally dishonest with others. This is the opposite of what “good guys” do: they are honest to those that are not honest with them, and they lie to themselves to support this blatantly harmful practice.
Being dishonest with others, ignoring their needs, harming those that seek to harm us. This is contrary to our programming and the social contract.
This social contract states that:
– YOU should be honest, while others are not.
– YOU should not harm anyone, while people harm you.
– YOU should not expect your needs to be met by others, while you are obligated to fulfil their needs.As a father I know the results of fulfilling every need of your kids, provide unearned rewards and forgive every transgression. They grow up as entitled parasites, expecting that someone provides for their needs, unable to achieve self-reliance.
As a husband I know the results of yielding to the demands of the wife, demands on your time, on your honor, on your integrity, on your freedom. The result is a broken house and a broken family.
I accept the responsibility for my actions, and I forgive myself as “I did not know better”.I would say that the moral of our times is an evil moral, it is a moral of cannibals as Ayn Rand says:
The fact that a man has no claim on others (i.e., that it is not their moral duty to help him and that he cannot demand their help as his right) does not preclude or prohibit good will among men and does not make it immoral to offer or to accept voluntary, non-sacrificial assistance.
It is altruism that has corrupted and perverted human benevolence by regarding the giver as an object of immolation, and the receiver as a helplessly miserable object of pity who holds a mortgage on the lives of others—a doctrine which is extremely offensive to both parties, leaving men no choice but the roles of sacrificial victim or moral cannibal . . . .
To view the question in its proper perspective, one must begin by rejecting altruism’s terms and all of its ugly emotional aftertaste—then take a fresh look at human relationships. It is morally proper to accept help, when it is offered, not as a moral duty, but as an act of good will and generosity, when the giver can afford it (i.e., when it does not involve self-sacrifice on his part), and when it is offered in response to the receiver’s virtues, not in response to his flaws, weaknesses or moral failures, and not on the ground of his need as such.The Objectivist“The Question of Scholarships”
The moral of self-interest and self-defence is a moral of integrity; of self-integrity. It preserves the dignity of the person; it preserves the justice of the universe.
It is the only moral with positive outcomes.I see a lot of people attacking me in this thread, as if I’m asking from a personal point of view. I’m not.
Yes it is, you blue pilled simp. No one, be they man or woman, owes you anything.
Life isn’t a series of business transactions.
Sorry, but that’s just crap. You can’t expect a darn thing from a woman. If you want a guarantee, get a stripper or prostitute. Yes, time/money/effort might result in getting something in return from a woman, but the idea that it’s a guarantee is just stupid. If a guy wants to spend on a woman in hopes of getting a return, and he gets none, he’s an idiot to keep spending.
Putting it a different way, if a woman dates a man for 6 months, does he now owe her something? What about a year, does he owe her cohabitation and a child? Hell no.
I get that unmet expectations are disappointing, but that doesn’t change the facts. And yes women can promise or lead a man on to believe returns are probable, but that still doesn’t mean you’re due anything. It’s a much happier life to understand risks instead of blinding thinking your due s~~~ that you’re not.
And disappointment in unmet expectations is certainly not an excuse for violence, anymore than a disgruntled ex-girl friend can key your car.
See, that’s what I’m saying.
Why do feminists and women and these two assholes here think a relationship should operate under different rules than any other investment?
I’ve long since accepted that they do (that’s part of the red pill, after all), but I figured it can’t hurt to make a conversation about it.
You put in time, you put in money, you put in material resources. Those of us that know better know that you’re just p~~~ing it away when you do that with a woman, but it still doesn’t make sense to me.
I mean, is it as simple as trying to use logic on illogical people?Why do feminists and women and these two assholes here think a relationship should operate under different rules than any other investment
Little new here Warlocc……to be calling out other, very respected, members.
Might want to step a bit lighter.
How can a woman be expected to be happy with a man who insists on treating her as if she were a perfectly normal human being.
I recommend a book called no more Mr Niceguy.
It’s not what you might think.
It spells out why many men are nice guys and why it is fundamentally wrong.Nice guys ain’t actually nice. They are people pleasers so they get their needs met. Usually in the form of approval.
It stems from toxic shame that is internalised.
By putting yourself first you have more to offer when it’s right to give. If it’s not fair equitable etc then don’t give.
The book goes into loads more detail. It’s a simple read and a game changer.
So F~~~ BEING MR Nice Guy. Just be you.
If people can’t handle that they can go find some other sucker.The object of life is not to be on the side of the majority, but to escape, finding oneself in the ranks of the insane. Marcus Aurelius
- AuthorPosts
You must be logged in to reply to this topic.
921526
921524
919244
916783
915526
915524
915354
915129
914037
909862
908811
908810
908500
908465
908464
908300
907963
907895
907477
902002
901301
901106
901105
901104
901024
901017
900393
900392
900391
900390
899038
898980
896844
896798
896797
895983
895850
895848
893740
893036
891671
891670
891336
891017
890865
889894
889741
889058
888157
887960
887768
886321
886306
885519
884948
883951
881340
881339
880491
878671
878351
877678
