Moker's little Story

[Moker MgtowParticipant 141]

Greetings Broeders!

I am Moker Mgtow, going my own way since 2015.

Man… I’ve dodged some major bullets. Right now, I’m sitting in my small studio appartment (I LOVE my little home-base!) writing this. I have no debt, apart from my mortgage, but house prices in Amsterdam have gone up the last year in an insane way, so I’ll be fine. Here I am, it’s 2017, and I’m totaly free do do whatever the f~~~ i want. Within financial limits of course. Damn dudes! That feels great! Mgtow might not have saved my life, but it damn well contributed to the quality of it!

As a young boy I didn’t want to have anything to do with girls. Girls were stupid and did stupid things. When a love scene was shown on TV I’d cringe and look away.

I attended my first wedding when I was 12. And it made me a firm antagonist against marriage. It was the gayest thing I’ve ever seen! Flowers everywhere, fabric bows, s~~~, I even had to wear one of those flower brooches. Everything was made, in my observation, to make me feel uncomfortable. Yes, brothers, weddings are a way to emasculate every man in the room and to praise the feminine. But you already know this. I didn’t know at the time and that one family wedding (allthough I loved, and still love, everyone involved) made it clear that marriage was not for me.

A little time later: Puberty hits in. The Little Brain makes his glorious entrance. Being a sensitive and a bit of a nerdy kid, romantic ideals slipt into my brain. For me at that time a girl who would love me was the highest ideal. *gulp* Blue pill swallowing confirmed. I would fantisize how great it would feel to be with a girl. It became my no. one priority. Now, being a sensitive nerdy dude I knew my chances were small, intuitively. Anxiety set in, and my early puberty years sucked ass. Felt like s~~~ being “the ugly dude always hanging with *****” ***** was my best friend (and still is to this day). He used to be a pretty boy but now he looks like an English hooligan. Brothers for life though.

Enter girlfriend one.

16 year old me suddenly had a girlfriend. I didn’t fancy her before, we were friends and that was ok. She kind of used me as a emotional tampon, talking about her much older and richer boyfriends. After one of the formentioned older and richer boyfriends dumped her she took an interest in me. I don’t know why. Luckily I wasn’t in love with her because she dumped me stating that “my father doesn’t approve of this relationship.” Being the smart motherf~~~er that I am I didn’t believe that. It turned out that I was not as exciting as the older, richer dudes. No hard feelings though because I really wasn’t in love with her. She was just a crazy girl and I knew that.

Enter girlfriend no. 2

One of my best friends has a sister. This girl wanted to get romanticaly involved with my friend *****, the pretty boy. Now, at the time we (*****, my friend and I) were in a band. She organized a party at her parents home while they were away for the weekend. As teenagers tend to do. It wasn’t about the band, it was about snatching *****. The plan failed. ***** brought with him a bottle of Smirnoff and a giant bag of weed. Within 2 hours into the party ***** was waisted as f~~~, barfed all over the floor and passed out in her little brothers bedroom.

I was pick no. 2

18 year old me had a serious case of oneitis. For 6 months this relations~~~ dragged on with much drama and gnashing of teeth. When she broke up with me she told me that “you have issues, you have to work them out. In the meantime, I’ll be waiting.” And yeah. I believed that. I really did. In contrast to girlfriend no. 1 I caught the oneitis really bad. She was funny and smart and “special”. I did love her. Very much even. Heartbroken I went my 18 year old way, trying to balance myself out. A few days after the breakup, on a saturday, I went to to place I went every weekend. All my friends were there and I was looking for some solace. Because I was feeling a bit under the water I turned up pretty late. And yes, all of my friends were there. Welcoming me in a way only men who have compassion for their fellow man can. One of them told me girlfriend no.2 just left. With her new boyfriend. What? So apperently she came to this cafe (she never wanted to go there because it was “filthy and the people there are losers”), knowing I was supposed to be there, to show off her new boyfriend! That’s a kind of betrayal I’ve never whitnessed before. My heart sank in to my shoes (Dutch saying) and I lost it.

Enter clinical depression

Yeah, I know right. I was a giant pussy-begging wimp. Clinical depression over a bint… It’s hard for me to accept that now. But at the time it was my reality. I had to cancel college. I had to really look after myself because I’d get suicidal and s~~~. I do have some genetic predisposition for depression and anxiety. This s~~~ triggered the hell out of me.

After 6 months of depression hell I finily got my act together, got a job and was doing relatively fine.

Enter f~~~buddy no. 1

Got myself a f~~~buddy. I thought that was pretty neat. A girl from our extended group of friends took an interest in me and she would take me to her parents home (who were rarely there), bake me some eggs and suck my dick. Pretty sweet deal, I thought. But, being the smarter 19 year old guy I was, I took some precoutions: I made her sign a “contract” that said if she would ever fall in love with me, the FB construction would end. Yeah, I know. Don’t judge me 😉

Enter girlfriend no. 3

F~~~buddy’s best friend forever fell in love. With me, that is. I kind of liked her too. F~~~buddy didn’t take it lightly. The “contract” didn’t mean jack s~~~ to her. Tantrums. A load of tantrums were thrown at me. I needed several drinks afterwards.

Girlfriend no. 3 was actually a very nice girl. She was 17 and I was 19 and we got along pretty good. The relationship lasted 10 years. The last 3 years almost sexless.

We bought a house in a village nearby Amsterdam and really gave that old house an upgrade ($$$$). I took the shed, making it my mancave. Now, I didn’t want to live in that village. I gave in. I didn’t want a dog. I gave in. (Allthough I really loved that dog in the long run). I gave in, and that was not good enough. After all the rebuilding was done we went on a last vacation. # days after we returned from the vacation she had the “I’m unhappy” talk with me. She felt like her life was flying by. She wanted to live for real, and since she was 27 years old, she still had some time.

Enter clinical depression No. 2

So, summerizing: I’ve gave her everything she wanted. She was not happy. She broke up with me (yeah, good timing as well. We were trying to sell the house in 2008. It took a full year to get the house sold, so we had to interact all the time.)

Looking back, I was such a pussy, such a mangina. I’m ashamed of former me. Loads of men had worse, much worse experiences and managed it far better then I did. Hail The Red Pill, for it makes men see clearly through the night.

The depression and panic attacks lasted long and I had to take a 4 month break from work. I thank my employers for giving me that space, it’s rare. Slowly I got into shape and fell into the pussytrap again.

Enter girlfriend no.4

Being 31 has it’s perks. You’re a bit older and you’re able to reason on a much mature level. However, that didn’t stop me from seeking pussy. Yes, a profile on a datingsite was put up. I had some dates and they all sucked. Fat women, crazy women, women who were glued to their phones… I changed my profile description and it said from then on: “Not available. Had enough”

Of course, that’s a chalenge for some women. I got message from a 25 year old women who looked pretty damn nice. She said “I was looking for another Moker, but I like your style. Wanna meet up?” And so we did. A 6 year lasting relations~~~ started. This particular relations~~~ was the most stressful of all. I could write thick books about that relations~~~.

This woman, whom I dearly loved, drove me to the red pill. So I guess I’m thankfull for having met her.

And now, 2017.

No depression. No anxiety. No debts. Money on the bank. Feeling fine most of the time. No stress. No worries. An open schedule, I can do whatever I want, whenever I want. I can choose who I want to be around with, and I can choose not to be round certain people. This is freedom, and freedom is the highest good!

I realise:

I’m so damn lucky not having to go through the meatgrinder of divorce. Looking after myself and my family and my friends, the people that really care, that’s what warms my cold black heart.

MGTOW

Greetings,

Your brother Moker

[NerevarParticipant 8040]

I’ll read the intro later, but it’s good to see another Dutchie here 😀 Whaddup Mokum!

"One of the best things internet exposed is just how insane women are." - Freeman_K

[NerevarParticipant 8040]

Good intro, brother. Welcome home!

"One of the best things internet exposed is just how insane women are." - Freeman_K

[Moker MgtowParticipant 141]

Mokum in het huis Nerevar! Thanks dude.

[Jan SobieskiParticipant 28791]

Welcome home brother.

Love is just alimony waiting to happen. Visit mgtow.com.

[Anonymous 42]

I love what you did to the Amsterdam flag! Mine has three X’s and I also have Holland’s flag, and a Jolly Roger or two, but no American flag, I’m likely to desecrate it,,, again…

[Moker MgtowParticipant 141]

Thanks. Hehehe, Mg-tower, keep on being a pirate. Desecrate what you want to, because the world is yours!

[Anonymous 42]

Moker Mgtow wrote:

Thanks. Hehehe, Mg-tower, keep on being a pirate. Desecrate what you want to, because the world is yours!

Does that mean I can pee wherever I want? Wait here, I’m gonna go pee on a feminist! Sick bitch will probably open her mouth and like it!

[Anonymous 0]

Welcome home, Moker
Beer’s in the fridge
Look forward to your posts

[Anonymous 5]

Welcome brother and thanks for the great read.
It’s a long hard brutal journey to Red Pill realisation for most of us which shows how deeply brainwashed we are by our gynocentric western civilization.

Enjoy the fact you don’t have to live in a shed anymore to find peace, solitude and freedom.

[Moker MgtowParticipant 141]

Well, I pee when I get the chance to. That is: when no one is looking. Peeing on feminists seems like a hard job. I don’t really want to engage with feminists, and peeing on them seems to be a waste of time. And pee.

[Moker MgtowParticipant 141]

@M52: Thanks brother! I’ll drink one for you!

And Thanks Trail428 for the support!

You guys rule.

Moker

[Moker MgtowParticipant 141]

Trail428:

Yeah, after taking the red pill it’s really strange to look backwards. Now, I am privileged because I’ve never been married. I have all my money, never been through the meatgrinder.

I have lost all hope of finding my “soulmate” though.

But I am looking forward to something new. In what form it comes…

[HitmanParticipant]

welcome !
soulmates are WAY overrated .
Hahhaha!!!

[AkanbiParticipant 2120]

There’s no such thing as “soulmates”.

You’re a lucky man, Moker. At least you didn’t get divorce raped.

Welcome to the brotherhood.

My brother make you no follow sheeple o. Look them and Go Your Way.

[AttonParticipant]

You come out of it all alive, that is not an easy thing.

A MGTOW is a man who is not a woman's bitch!

[MeisterParticipant 2093]

Your story was painful to read. Like the mangina diaries.

I’m glad you turned your life around.

Welcome home.

Monk

[Anonymous 5]

Brother welcome
You say you didnt go through divorce , but to a certain extent you did, just not the financial end of it , and thank whom ever you will for that.
The “emotional” divorces can be just as traumatic as any other, but for us guys its harder because we value honesty, commitment, integrity, honor. And s~~~ bag bitches run around , f~~~ around , and they like those characteristics and standards in a man , as long as they are not held to those same standards period.
And depression is and will be the only benefit you will ever reap from these mind, heart , wallet sucking , sucubouses.

Glad you Found your Manhood B~~~~ and are wearing them, feels much better…. right!!! Good

sincerely: Steve

[Anonymous 3]

Welcome Moker Mgtow. I loved you intro, it is true, it is by our hardships that we grow.
Grab a beer from the fridge and join the band.

[Moker MgtowParticipant 141]

Meister wrote:

Your story was painful to read. Like the mangina diaries.

Well, it was pretty painful to write, I can tell you that. “Mangina diaries” Hahaha!! You hit that one on the nail. Reading through the old emails I sent to various girlfriends I almost cringed to death. F~~~! How could I be so damn lame! Luckily I’m a man and capable of learning new concepts and new points of view.

[Author]

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