man cave???f~~~ that

[jack reacherParticipant 751]

okay, so these days I hear a lot about a man cave. Not that it affects me because I dont have some leaching gash to slowly kill me. But the pity i feel for these guys that need to hide their masculinity in some sort of cave. F~~~ dude, its your f~~~ing house. Why hide your masculinity??? Your son needs to see it, and the c~~~s need to see it, and you will loose half of the s~~~ anyway when the gash initiates a divorce and takes the kids from you.

The s~~~ is just some marketing s~~~ by some gash marketing c~~~s and manginas, who by their marketing background are deceitful and manipulative worms. They want you to feel you have to segregate your masculinity, instead of displaying it in the house, they can get the money off the gash who thinks she can control the house, but “let” you have the cave. So you spend money on fitting out some s~~~ hole where you need to hide your masculinity.

You poor married bastards.

[Deus Ex MachinaParticipant 1068]

Couldn’t agree with you more Jack,

Men pay for the house and all the  bills that go with it, mortgage, electric, water. But to the female mind, it’s THEIR DOMAIN. They decorate the whole damn house with the Man’s money and the Husband doesn’t even have one say. He’s the one buying all the furniture, putting together all the TV stands, bookshelves, and doing all the hammering for the interior decor of the house while the Wife hovers over Him like a old ghost, barking orders like a Drill Sergent.

 

Man Caves are usually in basements or outside garages, because it’s outside and out of sight, Females can’t handle seeing Masculinity in their face everyday, they need to have the sense of “Sanctuary” and “Peace”. Sanctuary and Peace my ass, they just want to make the house look good for their shallow friends, and stupid family members when they come over.

 

 

 

 

"If You have the Tooth of a Whale, You must have the Whale's Jaw to hold it". (i.e. One Must have the right qualifications for leadership) -Hawaiian Proverb

[Cap285Participant 6007]

Yup, I remember marriage. All my s~~~ was in the garage. Like Denis Leary said, put your s~~~ in storage and go visit it once in awhile.

Fuck this planet.

[StargazerParticipant 12505]

Re: my post from a few days ago in Philosophy about the whole Man Cave thing…

/forums/topic/the-man-cave/

Loved the bit where Dennis Leary talks about Gretzky’s man cave.

I’ve been to Wayne Gretzky’s house. The man has 5 MVP trophies. You know where they are? They’re in the f~~~ing garage!

[TYEParticipant 291]

Two Words…”SLAVE CAVE” I have no respect for a man that lets a woman control a house he paid for SHE can have a WOMAN CAVE, or if she paid for half she can decorate half the house how she wants.

[John DoeParticipant 743]

Man caves are a symptom of a consumer driven society.  A man cave is where a man puts all his useless junk; the woman takes the rest of the house.

The majority of the time you hear a man cave being mentioned, it is probably in some advertisement telling the man what he should buy to fill it with.

Masculinity is dead.  The man cave is just an idea applied buy marketing agencies to get men to buy more like their female counterparts.

[StargazerParticipant 12505]

One man’s useless junk is another man’s life pleasures.

My home is filled with Herman Miller furniture, a surround sound theater and PS4, a small but impressive firearm collection, a late model pinball machine, a small but high-end keyboard composition and recording studio, a very well stocked bar hand made out of walnut, a decent collection of lowbrow art and about a hundred tiki mugs from bars all around the world… all of them hand selected, well used and meaningful to me and none of which would survive six weeks into a marriage.

Anyone who walked into my home could not help but see my interests and personality reflected in my surroundings. This is what a Man Cave is to me… the one part of the modern marital home where a man can be himself… provided he keep it out of sight so that nobody can tell he is anything more than an appendage of his wife and kids. And even then it is denigrated.

A man may work hard for himself and live extravagantly as I do, or eschew materialism and exist with a minimum of clutter and expense, as you choose, and that is fine with me. Females, however, simply can not abide a man being himself and doing his own thing.

[John DoeParticipant 743]

doc:

To be honest doc I have no clue what you are talking about.  If a man cannot be himself in his own home he should question a lot of things (himself, his marriage, etc.)  A  man collecting objects  for his “identity” is no different than a woman shopping for clothes to “express” herself.

I understand the importance of solitude in order to collect your thoughts.

However, unless I am misinterpreting you (which is strongly possible), you just reinforced my point that the man cave is just another part of the consumer culture in that is exists solely as an accumulation of trinkets.

I believe it is a marketing scheme, pure and simple.  It is about getting men to by more stuff than they actually want or need under the guise of “self expression.”

[Deus Ex MachinaParticipant 1068]

Coming Soon…..the Woman Cave….

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

"If You have the Tooth of a Whale, You must have the Whale's Jaw to hold it". (i.e. One Must have the right qualifications for leadership) -Hawaiian Proverb

[johnconnor777Participant 85]

there you hit the “nail on head”… funny that most men either end up paying for the whole house or the majority of it, but then they are reduced to just having 1 room for his stuff while the woman gets to decided every other room!!?? F~~~ that s~~~! it is not like men are pets, my whole house is a man cave, if she doesn’t like it, there is the door or buy your own house with your money honey

[StargazerParticipant 12505]

To be honest doc I have no clue what you are talking about.

Hey John Doe, let me attempt to clarify my position.

I abhor the notion of a “man cave” as it refers to the one, pitiful room in a marital home in which the guy can be himself and be among the things that make him feel at home. I believe it’s reasonable to assume that a husband pays for at least half of the mortgage and home expenses in most marriages, yet it’s pretty well accepted that the wife makes the final decisions when it comes to furnishing and decorating their shared space. In a situation like this, a man is supposed to feel lucky that he has even one room to himself and even then his belongings, furnishings and decorations are denigrated.

Now, I get that you’re somewhat anti-consumerist but I’m speaking from the assumption that it’s perfectly okay to go out and work and earn money in order to buy comfortable furniture, appealing decorations, enjoyable toys and other creature comforts. If you’ll allow me that for a moment, I think it’s pretty safe to say that a person’s choice of furnishings, decorations and belongings (books, music, art, tools, toys, etc) reflect their interests and personality and vice versa. With me still?

So my point is that, given a marriage is made up of two individual people who came together each with their own personality, interests and style, it’s another abuse that men subject themselves to when getting married that they have to throw out their stuff and let their wives decorate the house… then hear people talk about their one little space of their own as if it were a damp hole in the ground full of chewed bones and animal s~~~.

If your brand of going your own way means you only earn enough money for the barest minimal survival then you probably don’t have to worry about this. Maybe you sleep under a lean-to shelter in a forest somewhere and that’s fine. But I have a nice apartment and some cool s~~~ that I worked hard to acquire for my own enjoyment and I’m quite happy being able to have it out in the open, not stuck in a garage or basement somewhere by a female who claims to love me.

And just as an afterthought, I have no problems with males or females expressing themselves through their clothing or their belongings. We all do this to some degree or another and there’s nothing wrong with it. In fact, I like that I am able to easily recognize something of a person’s inner self by looking at their clothes… it saves me a lot of time asking them questions and being disappointed by the answers. In my mind, you can buy whatever you want for whatever reason you want and be or try to be whatever kind of person you want… so long as you buy it with your own resources that you earned fairly.

[John DoeParticipant 743]

Deus:

Coming Soon…..the Woman Cave….

Haha, I thought that was the rest of the house though.

 

Doc:

I think I get your point.  To sum it up basically men are deride for having anything of their own.

 

[StargazerParticipant 12505]

To sum it up basically men are derided for having anything of their own.

Yeah, I suppose that is ultimately the point. I mean, as a female you can’t let a male get the idea that his time, energy and money are his own or else he’ll start to spend them how HE wants rather than using them to support you, your children and the other women and manginas in your life who support your agenda.

Can you imagine a wife being happy about her husband bringing home a new bass boat or belt sander or belching Bart Simpson beer bottle opener that his buddies gave him for his birthday (couldn’t resist the alliteration!)

No. Things that men like remind men of freedom and have to be banned. The man cave is the last bastion of freedom in the lives of most men and even that tiny bit of freedom is under constant assault. Most women would turn their husbands’ man caves into sewing rooms if they could (even though they never sew) just to finish the job of breaking their husbands spirits completely.

[DakotaParticipant 341]

A buddy of mine needed to waterproof his jacket so he put it on the kitchen table to spray it with Camping Waterproofing.  If you’ve never had the privilege of using it, it smells like lighter fluid, is sticky like silicone, and mists like air freshener.  So yeah, the wife hit the f~~~ing roof.  Probably should’ve done that in the garage. 

Honestly, I think the root of the problem is the use, and overuse, of the phrase man cave.  Obviously, designed by a woman to belittle her husband’s interests and communicate to her friends that she lets you have your own space.  Men used to work in the “shop”, the “garage” or the “basement.”  Man cave?  That’s bitchspeak!

 

[Anonymous 5]

Amazingly, I used to beg my girlfriend to allow me a portion of MY OWN FLAT as a man cave. She obviously said no, while sitting there spending my money on Chinese takeaways for herself and buying useless junk to “decorate” the rest of my flat with. Urgh.

[In Which We ServeParticipant 111]

Thanks for mentioning this. I’ve noticed the ‘mancave’ thing recently and didn’ t like it but thought it was just me. I don’t like the implication that being a man is something that has to be hidden away in a cave.

Seriously though, turn it around. Can you imagine the media, or anyone in public, talking about a ‘woman cave’ in the same way? Just wouldn’t happen.

There’s also the implication that men are messy and tasteless and that’s why their space has to be segregated. In my experience, though, many single men are very tidy and clean (anyone who’s been in the forces or military school will find its hard to break the habits of tidyness instilled into you) and have good taste in furniture – they just tend to prefer more practical, hardwearing stuff.

 

[IshmaelParticipant 5]

Amazingly, I used to beg my girlfriend to allow me a portion of MY OWN FLAT as a man cave. She obviously said no, while sitting there spending my money on Chinese takeaways for herself and buying useless junk to “decorate” the rest of my flat with. Urgh.

Mate. I got chills of horror just reading that. Glad to see you found the light.

There’s also the implication that men are messy and tasteless and that’s why their space has to be segregated. In my experience, though, many single men are very tidy and clean (anyone who’s been in the forces or military school will find its hard to break the habits of tidyness instilled into you) and have good taste in furniture – they just tend to prefer more practical, hardwearing stuff.

Yeah. Women tend to decorate their living space based upon outside opinion. They care what visitors will think and say to other people about their home. As you said, men tend to be more practical. Most guys I know have a utilitarian approach to their living space. Having said that, spend some time at student dorms and you’ll see a stark difference in cleanliness between male and female bedrooms. I’ve never known such disorder as a female students bedroom floor. Someone should do a study on it…

 

[whatdoesntkillyoumakesyoustrongerParticipant 15]

To be honest, I never gave too much thought on that. Prolly because I do not have a own home for too long yet and its just a student crib as I’m still young.

However the urge or feeling of expressing my attitude and character through decoration and other things never came to my mind. Even as a little kid I never felt the urge to have stuffed animals or similar things. Nowadays I’m happy with a comfy bed, a nice wardrobe and my tv (i actually do not use) and my pc. This of course might change over time, but I somehow think its settled in someone’s personality whether he likes to buy certain stuff for his home or if he’s just happy with basic things.

 

For me, if I should ever have a female in my life, who feels the urge to decorate my flat (I already had a gf who wanted to decorated my room when i was living with my parents) I really do not care as long as I have the last say. She would basically take over the work I would be to lazy to do anyway. Though reading docfenderson’s post, I imagine a really cool place. However I still believe, that I would be simply to lazy for that.

EDIT: In regards to the overall topic: Because of the stated facts above there’s no such thing as mancave to me, simply because I do not really give a s~~~ about the style of my flat, as long as its furbished and in a good location.

[In Which We ServeParticipant 111]

The offensive thing to me is the way the ‘man cave’ is portrayed in the media as a kind of toddler’s playpen or kid’s treehouse where men can go off and do their stupid childish ‘man stuff’ that they need to do, while women get on with the real business of life. At worst, it’s a kind of Indian Reservation for the last of the Man tribe.

[KeymasterKeymaster]

… yes and the way they speak about it. i.e….. “LET” him have it. “LET” him have his little room. “LET” him stay in the basement. “LET” him have the smallest room in the house to himself – the house that he pays for, and will one day give to me.

That’s the sick part.

My Dad retreated to the garage whenever possible. Even on Christmas(!) it was the one place he didn’t have to listen to the NOISE. Sometimes he would bring his greasy hands or a toolbox in to the house, or sit down at the table fixing something with a drill, or screwdriver, and Mom would “shoo” him out of the house. Just talking about this p~~~es me off.

If you keep doing what you've always done... you're gonna keep getting what you always got.

[Author]

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