Looking for a way to build up my self esteem in a productive way

[CasualGuy227Participant 170]

Hey guys looking to some brother for help on this one

due to lets just say personal stuff self esteem kinda been shot a lil lately, I will admit im getting better for the most part

I have been hitting gym and trying to lay off the junk food more that kinda stuff.

But I need some next level kinda suggestions to help in accepting more of my masculine energy in a positive way and help reach the mental peak as much as i can in trying to be more like a metaphorical rock and unflinching.

Any tips ?

Thanks in advance

Casual guy

[JustAnotherGuyParticipant]

Eat less, move more, lift heavy. Do something creative and constructive with your hands like whittling or learning guitar. Set clear goals and achieve them.

Cupcakes are Cold. MGTOW is Absolute Zero.
“Let us wait a little; when your enemy is executing a false movement, never interrupt him” –Napoleon Bonaparte, 1805

[Duke TogoParticipant 2664]

The gym is for looking into the mirror, martial arts is for looking to yourself. Forget the gym and lifting. Go train in a grappling style of martial art. You will have good days, you will have bad days. But you will grow in so many ways as a person. Grappling styles sort out the strong willed and hard working from the rest. Trust me, the attrition rate is high, and the participation rate is low, because it is hard, but the rewards are plentiful, physically, mentally and emotionally.

[AwakenedParticipant 35203]

Duke Togo wrote:

The gym is for looking into the mirror,

The gym is for building your body, building your strength, building your confidence, building your mind/body connection, building a social network (if you choose) etc. etc. etc.

The mirror is just another tool no different than barbells, dumbbells, cables, machines, etc.

Duke Togo wrote:

Go train in a grappling style of martial art.

To each their own….

In a World of Justin Beibers Be a Johnny Cash

[The Black ScorpionParticipant 2146]

Duke Togo wrote:

The gym is for looking into the mirror, martial arts is for looking to yourself. Forget the gym and lifting. Go train in a grappling style of martial art. You will have good days, you will have bad days. But you will grow in so many ways as a person. Grappling styles sort out the strong willed and hard working from the rest. Trust me, the attrition rate is high, and the participation rate is low, because it is hard, but the rewards are plentiful, physically, mentally and emotionally.

Plus giving you the skills and experience to physically defeat 99% of the people you ever met in a possible violent confrontation is a great confidence builder.

The greatest tragedy in life is to spend your whole life fishing only to discover that it was not fish you were after. - Henry David Thoreau

[CasualGuy227Participant 170]

Duke Togo wrote:

The gym is for looking into the mirror, martial arts is for looking to yourself. Forget the gym and lifting. Go train in a grappling style of martial art. You will have good days, you will have bad days. But you will grow in so many ways as a person. Grappling styles sort out the strong willed and hard working from the rest. Trust me, the attrition rate is high, and the participation rate is low, because it is hard, but the rewards are plentiful, physically, mentally and emotionally.

Do you mean like bjj ? i used to do that when i was younger and do need to get back into that

and im not much of a mirror guy long as i look presentable im happy its more the gym conditioning im after for general and pragmatic health

[AwakenedParticipant 35203]

CasualGuy227 wrote:

im not much of a mirror guy

FYI: Gyms have mirrors so People can see if they’re using proper form while they’re performing their lifts. Mirrors are essential in a gym. They’re not there for vanity’s sake.

In a World of Justin Beibers Be a Johnny Cash

[CasualGuy227Participant 170]

Awakened wrote:

CasualGuy227 wrote:

im not much of a mirror guy

FYI: Gyms have mirrors so People can see if they’re using proper form while they’re performing their lifts. Mirrors are essential in a gym. They’re not there for vanity’s sake.

that is a fair and valid point i will keep that in mind

[JB BooksParticipant 3182]

It’s good that you’re reaching out Casual Guy. Try not to get too bent out of shape about what negative people say because they’re simply mirroring their own negativity. Try to listen to people who seem to have their act together, or are at least appear to be in the process of doing so. Be patient with yourself, it takes a while to grow. You’ll find activities and ways to build your self esteem.

We just don't realize life's most significant events while they're happening. Back then, I thought, "Well, there'll be other days". I didn't realize that that was the only day. - "Moonlight" Graham

[CasualGuy227Participant 170]

JB Books wrote:

It’s good that you’re reaching out Casual Guy. Try not to get too bent out of shape about what negative people say because they’re simply mirroring their own negativity. Try to listen to people who seem to have their act together, or are at least appear to be in the process of doing so. Be patient with yourself, it takes a while to grow. You’ll find activities and ways to build your self esteem.

thanks il try not to rush the process and give it more of a solid footing so it stays as a positive habbit

[Duke TogoParticipant 2664]

CasualGuy227 wrote:

Duke Togo wrote:

The gym is for looking into the mirror, martial arts is for looking to yourself. Forget the gym and lifting. Go train in a grappling style of martial art. You will have good days, you will have bad days. But you will grow in so many ways as a person. Grappling styles sort out the strong willed and hard working from the rest. Trust me, the attrition rate is high, and the participation rate is low, because it is hard, but the rewards are plentiful, physically, mentally and emotionally.

Do you mean like bjj ? i used to do that when i was younger and do need to get back into that
and im not much of a mirror guy long as i look presentable im happy its more the gym conditioning im after for general and pragmatic health

BJJ, Judo, Sambo or Wrestling. You get all the benefits of gym, amplified plus way more. You did BJJ, stop being a pussy and get back into and keep going back to training. It is very simple and very effective.

[StealthParticipant 5354]

Bodybuilding.

"Once you’ve taken care of the basics, there’s very little in this world for which your life is worth deferring." -David Hansson. "It’s not when women are mean or nasty that anything is out of the ordinary. It’s when they are NICE to you that you have to be on high alert..." -Jackinov.

[SpleeferParticipant 965]

Travel somewhere alone. Pick a city you have never been to and go check it out. It’s fun to plan a trip. You learn many lessons and enjoy success when you travel alone. Go and make new memories, Have fun and lighten up at least once a month.

Galatians 5:1 (KJV) Stand fast therefore in the liberty wherewith Christ hath made us free, and be not entangled again with the yoke of bondage.

[Anonymous 38]

CasualGuy227 wrote:

Hey guys looking to some brother for help on this one
due to lets just say personal stuff self esteem kinda been shot a lil lately, I will admit im getting better for the most part
I have been hitting gym and trying to lay off the junk food more that kinda stuff.
But I need some next level kinda suggestions to help in accepting more of my masculine energy in a positive way and help reach the mental peak as much as i can in trying to be more like a metaphorical rock and unflinching.
Any tips ?
Thanks in advance
Casual guy

No shortcuts my friend, it takes time. Some kind of project can help, renovating a house helped me.

Also, remove ALL negative energy people from your life.

[iMickey503Participant 12465]

CasualGuy227 wrote:

I have been hitting gym

After doing a complete analysis. I have found the solution.

READ THIS THREAD>

Trying to find that "one thing" for better personal development

Then. GET THE F~~~ OUT OF THE U.K.

I had a convo with another guy from there. ITS THE UK man. The place sucks. I can’t even believe its really that f~~~ed over there! When I was talking to a member from here, I could just FEEL the Somberness through the phone call. Jesus! What a S~~~y place.

When he told me just how f~~~ed people are over there? HOLY SHEET. No wonder so many Brits are so depressed. Damn, Come to the USA BRO. Go to Brazil, go anywhere. BUT GET THE F~~~ OUT OF THE UK!

You are all alone. If you have been falsely accused of RAPE, DV, PLEASE let all men know about the people who did this. http://register-her.net/web/guest/home

[FunInTheSunParticipant 8283]

Hey CasualGuy,

I’m not an expert, but I’ll share what I’ve realized. When I was in my 20s—doing odd jobs and feeling frustrated with my life—my dad told me that the source of my problems was MYSELF. I got really angry when he said that, because there were a lot of EXTERNAL FACTORS in the world that made me upset.

You know, it’s very easy to react to the world in a negative way. It’s easy to complain about other people’s high standards and expectations of you. It’s easy to be considered a failure when it comes to the rules of your society and the standards set by your peers. But one lesson I’ve learned during my decades of living is: no one can tell you what you’re worth—not even your parents.

Having a low self-esteem is a CHOICE. I mean, ponder this for a while. The feeling you have about yourself right now COMES FROM WITHIN. You learned how to feel that way based on your interactions with other people. It is possible to unlearn it, and say to yourself, “I value myself. I think my life is worth living. I should be healthy, prosperous, and getting my share of the great things this world has to offer. I don’t care what other people say about me, I’m going to create a good life for myself.” If you really think about it, it’s just as easy to think highly of yourself as it is to think lowly of yourself. It’s just a slight shift of perception. That’s all it is. No one can make you do it or prevent you from doing it. It has to come from within. Your mind belongs to you. You own it. You are free to use it to your advantage! That’s good news, buddy.

Sometimes I like to go hiking in the mountains. It is an environment where I can get away from people and their drama. I can go to a quiet place and think clearly as I walk along a dirt path. It is a place where there is no judgement of any of my mistakes or shortcomings. I just exist with the animals and that’s fine. The natural world allows you to be who you are without shame, and it’s refreshing to be in an environment like that once in a while. Hiking keeps me from going crazy. I encourage you to go to a quiet place, and think about who you are as a person, what goals are meaningful to you, and what strategies you have to use in order to deal with humanity. Find some good qualities about yourself and start from that point. Then develop more talents/skills. If you’re doing well with your life, you’ll know it, and you won’t need an award, a standing ovation, or anything external to grant you the rights to a high self-esteem.

—FunInTheSun

Recommended reading: Think and Grow Rich / Psycho-cybernetics.

"I saw that there comes a point, in the defeat of any man of virtue, when his own consent is needed for evil to win-and that no manner of injury done to him by others can succeed if he chooses to withhold his consent. I saw that I could put an end to your outrages by pronouncing a single word in my mind. I pronounced it. The word was ‘No.’" (Atlas Shrugged)

[GeraldParticipant 3631]

.dental study. Find a topic of interest and learn… for me it was/is IT. I study and test for certification which proves my success.

Any topic works though, want to learn about plumbing, study, then go build or fix a pipe… build a pump system, etc. Like electronics, get parts and start circuit boarding, etc..

No longer can we walk away, we must run. Remove the motive power.

[Solo MAN’S WisdomParticipant]

CasualGuy227 wrote:

But I need some next level kinda suggestions to help in accepting more of my masculine energy in a positive way and help reach the mental peak as much as i can in trying to be more like a metaphorical rock and unflinching.

High self esteem is a byproduct of health and making strong correct choices in life. This does not come naturally for humans, and must be learned and practiced.

The cornerstone of all masculinity is the Love of Truth.

Learn the categories of Truth.

1. Absolute Truth [aka God’s Truth]. This is Truth with a capital “T”. Truth that has always been and will always be TRUE.

2. Objective truth [aka Men’s truth]. This is scientific truth. 1 + 1 = 2 truth. Truth that can be reproduced and is consistent [Laws of Health, and Science].

3. Subjective truth [aka women’s truth]. This is our legal system [in the USA]. This is where life is one gigantic grey area. Subjective truth is destructive. It’s the truth of consensus, the truth of Hollywood, the truth that is true only long enough to get her what she wants [“. . . he was abusive because he disagreed with me officer.”].

Embracing objective truth and seeking out Absolute Truth, while recognizing subjective truth for what it is will improve your knowledge base, and strengthen your will power, allowing you to make better, more beneficial choices in life, thereby strengthening your self esteem.

When women lead, destruction is the destination. -- Me.

[Anonymous 38]

FunInTheSun wrote:

Having a low self-esteem is a CHOICE. I mean, ponder this for a while. The feeling you have about yourself right now COMES FROM WITHIN. You learned how to feel that way based on your interactions with other people. It is possible to unlearn it, and say to yourself, “I value myself. I think my life is worth living. I should be healthy, prosperous, and getting my share of the great things this world has to offer. I don’t care what other people say about me, I’m going to create a good life for myself.” If you really think about it, it’s just as easy to think highly of yourself as it is to think lowly of yourself. It’s just a slight shift of perception. That’s all it is. No one can make you do it or prevent you from doing it. It has to come from within. Your mind belongs to you. You own it. You are free to use it to your advantage! That’s good news, buddy.

This. Our mind sets our reality.

[FrostByteParticipant 19005]

I have suggestions.
1. Your happiness, contentment and self esteem are in future. Why? You have to something today to reap the reward tomorrow. You can’t have great lunch tomorrow if you didn’t pack a great lunch today to for tomorrow. Forget having self esteem today if you didn’t do anything yesterday for it. Make a plan today for tomorrow.

2 Measure yourself against who you were before. If 5 years ago you were un-degreed and today you graduated then that’s the measurement you need to be proud of. Don’t measure yourself against what anyone else thinks or says. Who were you then, who are you now.

3. Remember you had a purpose before anyone else had an opinion. Focus on the purpose and ignore the opinions. Most people are unworthy of listening to. If you need feedback seek it from people you trust AND those who know.

If you rescue a damsel in distress, all you will get is a distressed damsel.

[Author]

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