I have a problem with my brain

[OhnoParticipant 668]

I made great progress in the last years in understanding how society works by being a geek on the internet.
While Im very good at everything that has to do with logic and stategy Im no spoke talent at all.
I lack concentration in a tremendous way when Im in a discussion.
I often forget what I just said or when talking about a subject I cant really go into detail even when I know alot about it.
Also when being interrupted while speaking it distracts me alot.

Now Im looking for ideas of how to gain access to all the information and knowledge that is in my brain, while being in a conversation with someone.

Do you have ideas how to improve my concenration?

Can be anything that helps except training to speak by speaking with other people more often. I know more practice in speaking would improve this skill, but this is not an option.

[Jan SobieskiParticipant 28791]

See a doctor. Sounds serious.

Love is just alimony waiting to happen. Visit mgtow.com.

[Anonymous 42]

Speaking in public with all eyes on you will do allot to cure it, especially in meetings that boil away with people arguing, shaking fists, and being all sorts of angry.

You may need a little more boldness if people interrupting distract you from thinking. But don’t quote me, I’m half crazy myself…

[Anonymous 54]

The brain is complex, and requiers professonal anyalis.Your struggle could be from brain injurys if youve had any, mabey ADD ( some dont consider that to be legitimate. I do) If like me, you are frustrated with haveing an inteligent brain that struggles, see a nueroligist if you can.

[KeymasterKeymaster]

Sorry. I can’t relate. I was interacting with some guy and he appeared to wander off while we were in conversation, and he said “Oh, sorry man, I have, like, total A.D.D”.

I said “No you don’t. Just pay closer attention.”

Guess what. I had his attention.

The first, most effective form of communication is not speaking. It’s shutting the f~~~ up and listening. That talent is sorely lacking in general.

Ohno wrote:

I’m looking for ideas of how to gain access to all the information and knowledge that is in my brain, while being in a conversation with someone.

Are you expecting to be some kind of encyclopedia? Very few people expect conversation beyond “Hi how’s it going. Looks like rain. Care for a waffle?”

Quite seriously, don’t look to reveal everything you know. In fact don’t reveal ANYTHING and that may actually make you more interesting to other people, and then they will asks questions. Even when they ask questions why would you need to “gain access to all the information and knowledge that is in my brain, while being in a conversation with someone”??

I just don’t find conversations a challenge. But maybe you’re trying to think and speak at the same time – and that’s why you’re easily distracted.

LISTEN…… PROCESS…… THINK…… FORMULATE A RESPONSE…… PAUSE ….. SPEAK…..

Repeat.

Don’t even open your mouth unless you know what you’re going to say.
That’s actually an art form.

Become a master of …. “the pause”.

Some people just blab on without thinking at all!! I promise you, they put NO thought or consideration in to the CRAP that comes out of their mouths. So I really fail to see the problem here. In fact, more people should aspire to being better at formulating a thought before saying something.

Like Madonna.

—–

Anonymous wrote:

ADD some dont consider that to be legitimate

Well I guess I’m one of them. When I was “wandering” in school and not paying attention, they didn’t call it “ADD” back then. It was called “PAY BETTER ATTENTION”. That s~~~ was on my report cards.

No teacher ever said “Oh that’s OK sweetie. You just have A.D.D. Here’s a pill.”.

If you keep doing what you've always done... you're gonna keep getting what you always got.

[Anonymous 54]

Its hard to relate to a struggle you dont have. Yes the cure is to pay attention.

I would use Robin Williams as an example. He just let it fly. He found a way to make it work for him.

[Anonymous 42]

Bravo KM! The PAUSE gives your brain time to formulate something magnificent and profound, leaving people speechless and without any further questions or doubts.

Pause gives you time to think instead of blurting and babbling.

[KeymasterKeymaster]

Anonymous wrote:

Its hard to relate to a struggle you dont have.

I admit that fully, and opened that way intentionally.

Anonymous wrote:

I would use Robin Williams as an example. He just let it fly. He found a way to make it work for him.

Great example. Making it funny (make people laugh) etc….. is another way to deal with it.

People don’t remember what you “SAY” — as much as how you make them FEEL.
It didn’t matter that he was all over the place. That was his charm.

So in a way, it’s still not a problem.

Maybe GermanTruther is over-thinking it and being too hard on himself.
Nothing wrong with being your own worst critic either. It sparks self-improvement.

If you keep doing what you've always done... you're gonna keep getting what you always got.

[Anonymous 54]

To clarify, Yes they over perscribe ridelin to any boy that acts like a boy. People use it as an exuse for lazyness and not giveing a s~~~.
But.. For some, that little pause is almost impossable.

[Anonymous 54]

All I can say is that its damn frustrateing. I believe in working with nature rather than against it.Im a musician. The average song last 3-5 minutes. Hahahh perfect!

[narwhalParticipant]

If you’re trying to communicate in a business sense, and you want to make sure you don’t miss key points, then right it down in advance. You don’t need details down, just words that will trigger you.

I actually did just that this morning. I had to give a demo/proof of concept presentation, and there about a dozen key points I wanted to make sure I covered. There was no way I wasn’t going to miss a point if I didn’t right it down…especially since I was asked questions throughout.

But I agree with @KM that often times, it’s best to just keep you mouth shut in many, many instances. When you do, work out what you’re going to say before you speak. Take your time.

My son kind of does something similar. Quite often, he will start a sentence and have a huge pause in the middle as he had not worked out the rest of the sentence in advance. It gets compounded because he’ll be asked a question during the pause, further breaking his train of thought. I’ve tried to work with to think it all through before you speak, but I really don’t notice it much, since I’m used to it. Much of the time, he doesn’t do this, particularly when he’s trying to be funny for some reason. Not exactly sure why.

Ok. Then do it.

[Anonymous 54]

Imagine Robin Williams working in a cubical.

I see someone sitting at a desk, calmy writeing, focused for houres.

I think, how different my life would have been, if only I possed that “pause”you speak of.

[OhnoParticipant 668]

Anonymous wrote:

If like me, you are frustrated with haveing an inteligent brain that struggles, see a nueroligist if you can.

So what was the neuroligist solution? Medication?

[ExecrationParticipant 1496]

First I’m not a clinical Psychologist, Second ,I’m not bad mouthing you but quite possibly,

You have expierienced some form of long-term emotional abuse or long term neglect during childhood.

It sounds to me like self-doubt that causes social anxiety.

Someone , at some point, made you feel inferior for a long time. you grew lonely and attempted to seek out this individuals approval and never receieved it.

Your first primary relationship could have been the cause.

The solution is to accept yourself as you are or you will question what ways you will need to improve yourself for the approval of others.

Remedy: if your young or in school seek out a school .psychologist

Being made to feel comfortable about who you are is important

Second, most people can’t live up to the standard you set for yourself and will think of you as strange because, to them your talking alien.While your concern is with seeking the approval of others by constantly learning or attempting to be perfect they havent even expierienced a conversation on that level.

Like KM said average people ramble on about the inconsequential.Try to have fun with that.

Yout too self-concious as to where others expierience less self doubt because they arent.

[ExecrationParticipant 1496]

Its ok to make mistakes, f~~~ the person who made you beilieve you had to be perfect.

And realise their approval isnt worth your time or life-investment.

[Anonymous 54]

Ohno wrote:

Old Sage wrote:

If like me, you are frustrated with haveing an inteligent brain that struggles, see a nueroligist if you can.

So what was the neuroligist solution? Medication?

I never saw a neoroligist.Sorry I wrote that badly.I just try and find what works best for me.My point being that the brain is complex, no one here is qaulified.

[OhnoParticipant 668]

Keymaster wrote:

But maybe you’re trying to think and speak at the same time

No, but thats exactly what I want to be able to.
I admire people that can do this.

Pausing and thinking before I say something is of course the method I use so far. See i wrote im good at logical thinking. Of course I use this method to think first before I say something.

Pausing and thinking a few secs and then go on doesnt work, because when you stopped talking for 1 sec or even when you take a little breath people already start talking.

And shutting the f~~~ up and listening to others without interrupting is actually what Im doing.
Most people are bad at this i know, but not me.
I mean if the dynamics in conversations wouldnt always be that as soon as you take a little breath after a sentence, someone else immediately starts talking..I wouldnt have a problem.
It would be perfect if when someone talks he can talk without interruptions and noone says anything until the person stopped speaking for 3-5 full seconds. But in reality you will always have people at the table that cant wait and just want to hear themselves talking again.

[OhnoParticipant 668]

Anonymous wrote:

My point being that the brain is complex, no one here is qaulified.

Yea I know, but there could be other things that help increasing concentration. Well at least I hope so, because I will not take any medicine at all.
Maybe certain foods, or weight lifting for example.

[OhnoParticipant 668]

Execration wrote:

Its ok to make mistakes, f~~~ the person who made you beilieve you had to be perfect.

Well I must f~~~ myself then, because Im that person.

[Anonymous 54]

Ohno wrote:

Keymaster wrote:

But maybe you’re trying to think and speak at the same time

No, but thats exactly what I want to be able to.
I admire people that can do this.

Pausing and thinking before I say something is of course the method I use so far. See i wrote im good at logical thinking. Of course I use this method to think first before I say something.

Pausing and thinking a few secs and then go on doesnt work, because when you stopped talking for 1 sec or even when you take a little breath people already start talking.

And shutting the f~~~ up and listening to others without interrupting is actually what Im doing.
Most people are bad at this i know, but not me.
I mean if the dynamics in conversations wouldnt always be that as soon as you take a little breath after a sentence, someone else immediately starts talking..I wouldnt have a problem.
It would be perfect if when someone talks he can talk without interruptions and noone says anything until the person stopped speaking for 3-5 full seconds. But in reality you will always have people at the table that cant wait and just want to hear themselves talking again.

Sounds like its the people around you that have add! Hahah I admire people that pause and think. Adders dont listen. Dont bother with them.I cant stand them. And Im one of them! Hahah

[Author]

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