How do you guys deal with depression

[cj023Participant 723]

It’s a serious question for me? I’ve went through their red pill rage and it’s really not a mental problem, but a SOCIAL problem. Anyways I’ve went my own way and it went from being alone to all alone. Just some friendly suggestions, or tips would be greatly appreciated.

[cj023Participant 723]

IDGAF, about auto correct in short: I need out of this s~~~, what do you do?

[KeymasterKeymaster]

cj023 wrote:

Anyways I’ve went my own way and it went from being alone to all alone.

Here’s a little quote on “being alone” and it’s not bulls~~~ . . .

“I used to think living alone was the worst thing in the world. It’s NOT. The worst thing is being surrounded by people who make you FEEL alone”.
– Robbin Williams

When I read that, I realized why I felt more “alone” being around plenty of family and “friends” I couldn’t stand. The way I see it , if you don’t PREFER being alone in your own company, you’re kinda doing it wrong. After all, married men are some of the loneliest men you’ll ever meet. That’s not bulls~~~ either.

cj023 wrote:

How do you guys deal with depression

I refuse to acknowledge such a state exists. I know that’s “denial” in a way, but it’s not acceptable to me to be “depressed”. Why not fix it? (i.e Depressed about being overweight? Hit the gym! etc. )

You know the expression “everyone wants/deserves to be happy?”

Well…. depressives don’t. If they were “happy”, they couldn’t be depressed anymore , and they would have to go out into the world and LIVE – which can be depressing.

—

I believe chasing “happy” is the first, best way to be depressed and miserable. These happy chasers are always ruining a perfectly fine day asking why they are not deliriously “happy” right now. But for a man, being “happy” means just being content. When you’re CONTENT, happiness is sure to follow.

CONTENT is where it’s at. Very few people will tell you that.
They all think they “deserve to be happy”. . . and society perpetuates this message.

That’s why their medicine cabinets are filled to the hilt with “anti-depressants”.
And mine is not.

If you keep doing what you've always done... you're gonna keep getting what you always got.

[HitmanParticipant]

depression is anger directed at yourself.
you have to forgive yourself.
it’s the only way to get rid of it if you have it.
you are human and we all make mistakes,
you have to stop beating yourself up.
when the world is kicking your ass,
you do NOT join in and help to kick it more.
.come to terms with yourself.
it’s your life.
forgive yourself brother.
.

[bladeParticipant]

If you are on an antidepressant some antidepressants don’t suit certaiin people and can really have a bad reverse action that can get to a point of making you suicidal . Are you on one ?

I found when i was down some people that i associated with made me worse , much worse . Alot of people just don’t understand .

There is different types of depression to then there can be reasons as well to what has triggerd your depression .

Different types aswell can have different affects . Such as physical pain that can be constant especially across your chest . Do you have this ?

Have you had times of thoughts of suicide ?

Humor is very good for myself i have found . It helps .

What country do you live in for advice for you if you think you might need help .

My own opinion stay the f~~~ away from pshycologists . Get a councilor .

Remember there is always someone on this site 24 hrs a day bro .

I myself had depression at one point i was actually frozen and didn’t want to open my eye’s and only left my bed to take a p~~~ and that was a mission . Three bottles of water i kept next to my bed . I have bad ptsd and had really bad depression which was situational . Pain in my chest had for years and has only recently gone .

Bro we care

THE PLANTATION HAS NOW TURNED INTO THE KILLING FIELDS . WOMAN ARE NOW ROLLING CAMBODIAN STYLE .

[bladeParticipant]

That quote by robbin williams km put up is so true . Many people in the world are self centerd to . But do take into account that alot of people don’t understand depression and think you should just snap out of it wich is impossible

THE PLANTATION HAS NOW TURNED INTO THE KILLING FIELDS . WOMAN ARE NOW ROLLING CAMBODIAN STYLE .

[Heave-Ho MgtowParticipant 1797]

By all alone, are you meaning reclusive? This is not uncommon as someone learns to adapt to new changes in their life and how they may now see things as being different.

I’m an engineer, not a psychologist, so take my words as just that, words, but you may be adapting to change. Solitude gives time to reflect. Reflection brings true change. Fret not brother, the red pill is working. Your not depressed, your awaken

skip the cavernous vag and go your own way

[dobsin593Participant 239]

Except for some family, I consider myself to be alone.
I’ve got many things to focus on in life and get busy.
Just don’t compare yourself to other socializing people around you very much as you will feel you are lacking in some way and depression may result.
Your being all alone and depressed is temporary. There can be a big shock after you take the red pill. Everything you have been through, past offenses and hurts which takes a little time to deal with and then let go of while you focus on yourself and what you’ve got ahead. Stay busy and don’t get caught up in zero activity mulling over any baggage in your mind.

[MattNYCParticipant 2329]

I don’t know much about depression, but i do know a fair amount about starting conversations & building social connections.

I built some very positive relationships with good people by

1) finding a group with a common interest, and
2) making that group part of my social routine

For example: i dance tango. Every week my tango school holds 2 hours’ worth of practice dances. I’ve been going every week for a year. I know just about everyone there, we keep in touch outside of the school, plan dinners, trips out to other dance events, etc.

[Pedal, run, rowParticipant]

For me there is a certain duality to my being alone. On one hand I am at peace in a way that I never have been before, in all my years of yearning to be truly loved. One the other hand the years of programming that told me that I should not be happy alone does cause some internal conflict/discomfort.

I am still working my way though it, but I do not intend to go backwards in my journey.

The only tip I could possibly give not knowing you or your situation is to take care of yourself, and as Hitman wisely advised, be kind to yourself. If you did something truly horrible, than seek atonement and forgiveness. But don’t beat yourself up over minor failings, or mistakes.

I truly believe in a world of sickness, you would have to be sick yourself not feel depressed about how f~~~ed up s~~~ truly is, or you would have to do what most people do and distract yourself 24/7. Being depressed now and again is a sign that you are still connected to reality.

[Elric GreenstoneParticipant 1637]

Keymaster wrote:

When I read that, I realized why I felt more “alone” being around plenty of family and “friends” I couldn’t stand. The way I see it , if you don’t PREFER being alone in your own company, you’re kinda doing it wrong.

I’ve come to the realization that most of the people I’ve spent time on in my life – almost none of whom have stuck around during these tough times – were actually friends. Which is probably why, so very often, I felt alone, very alone, even when I was with a group of people.

Keymaster wrote:

When you’re CONTENT, happiness is sure to follow.

Just trying to get back to the point where I’m content. Employment would help. I have some very frustrating particular issues with that, due to some very poor decisions made in my past.

Hitman wrote:

depression is anger directed at yourself.
you have to forgive yourself.

Hitman wrote:

you are human and we all make mistakes,
you have to stop beating yourself up.

Thank you. That does, in fact, mean a lot to me.

*****

Thank you, OP. I’ve been wrestling with depression all day. This has been very helpful. Thank you all, men.

"You can either love women, or understand women. You can't do both. Because once you understand women, you realize that there is really nothing to love."

[Pedal, run, rowParticipant]

Oh, also on a more surface level, get out in the sun as much as possible. Try to get 30 minutes a day. Walk, run, if possible. Both anecdotal and scientific evidence points to sun exposure and exercise being beneficial for depression.

[uchibenkeiParticipant 7965]

I find I get depressed when I’m bored and not doing anything. I don’t mean when i have a couple hours to kill. I mean when I’m not progressing to my goals at all.

I find I’m happiest when I’m busy working towards something.

When I’m not able to progress towards my primary goal, i make other goals and work towards that.

My goal now is to buy rental properties and save for a home with an oceanview. I’m at a standstill now wuth that so I’m focusing on getting back in shape. It keeps me from getting depressed.

I bathe in the tears of single moms.

[bladeParticipant]

Stay away from alcohol . I am a hypocrite because i did use alcohol . But i have ceased now and feal much better for it but couldn’t see at the time how it kept me f~~~ed up . I am slowly returning back to getting into my training . Started back of with just a lazy stroll and working it up from there . Physical health to is important . My time out . 1 hour stroll followed by one hour of looking at nature .

If your not up to that i STRONGLY recommend sensory technique . Cosg you about 50 dollars to set your self up . If ya intrested just let me know and i will tell ya how . Told stealthy this on one of his threads and a few other guys . IT REALLY WORKS

THE PLANTATION HAS NOW TURNED INTO THE KILLING FIELDS . WOMAN ARE NOW ROLLING CAMBODIAN STYLE .

[Anonymous 2]

Brother I’ve dealt with it since I was a youth. It never leaves and is always right in the back of my mind. Find a focus, fill your mind with something you enjoy. The worst thing for depression is an idle mind. I’m not a doctor but I’ve got a lifetime of trial and error expierences with depression. When you go to those dark places in your mind, you have to have something to cling to to help pull you out. For me it’s God and knowing I have a child who needs me. Many good people have been lost because of nothing to cling to. We talk of Robin Williams a lot here. He had nothing to cling to, he made people laugh for a living and was good. He went to the abyss and never came back. This may be deeper than you’re expierencing, but if the thought of doing the unthinkable comes to your mind get your ass some help. Go to a man not a female you will get NO empathy. I say that not because of our forum but because I’ve lived it. Female counselors suck. I’ll say some prayers for you and God bless you…..The rest of my forum brothers to!!

[FunInTheSunParticipant 8283]

Long walks. Hiking in the mountains. Sitting on the shore and watching the waves.

Sometimes I listen to audio books on CD’s. Zig Ziglar has some inspirational stuff. I also recommend a CD of Chris Gardner’s “Start Where You Are.” We can learn from others who have gone through misery and survived. I recommend going to your local library and reading books about depression. If it is severe, try to get professional help. Best wishes to you.

"I saw that there comes a point, in the defeat of any man of virtue, when his own consent is needed for evil to win-and that no manner of injury done to him by others can succeed if he chooses to withhold his consent. I saw that I could put an end to your outrages by pronouncing a single word in my mind. I pronounced it. The word was ‘No.’" (Atlas Shrugged)

[Anonymous 54]

A complex topic.
Sometimes caused, when the world isnt the way you beleive it should be.

Being out in nature can be helpful.

[AutoliteParticipant]

cj023 wrote:

Anyways I’ve went my own way and it went from being alone to all alone.

I can’t really offer any great advice there. I don’t get lonely. It’s just the way my brain is wired. I’m more comfortable being by myself. I will say though that you should think about getting a dog. A dog will give you far more loyalty and companionship than any person ever would or could.

cj023 wrote:

How do you guys deal with depression.

This may sound a little f~~~ed-up, but when I read about others whose lives are so much worse than mine I start to feel more appreciative for what I have and then my life doesn’t seem so bad. I feel better knowing how bad or how much worse life can actually get if that makes any sense…

[AutoliteParticipant]

Anonymous wrote:

For me it’s God

I would very strongly advise against that. I know that a lot of you guys like to work that angle, with good intentions, but you don’t see the huge liability there.

For many people, there is no god. Realizing that there is no god is not a choice. It’s a determination that you are forced to accept once you realize that all the evidence points to the fact that god never actually existed. That realization is the ‘Red Pill’ of religion

I’m not intentionally trying to bash religion or be disrespectful, but I ask that you try and understand that when someone trusts and believes in a god, then realizes that god was never actually there, it might only further deepen the anxiety and depression that the person is already dealing with…

[,Participant 1301]

Accomplishments
Make
Depression
Evaporate
.
Then Happiness, Optimism, FUN, JOY immunize you from it.

Does it feel GOOD to be HAPPY>?
THEN BE HAPPY.

i am very serious about this. its not easy. its not trite.
Its a quest and a mindset, a journey and a goal all together.

Accomplishments are first and foremost in any son’s or father’s self evaluation. It need not be complex. It does need to something Positive in consequence or related to future.
—–
Just cleaning your living quarters is a good accomplishment to build upon.
Outdoors, hell yes, hikes and camps and natural earth beauty to behold. Inspiring.

YOU have to find what makes you feel good and positive in accomplishment. Build and branch from one to the next positive accomplishment.

Depression is a dangerous, destructive, addictive internal mindset. It can be genetic, learned, fed by other addictions, sparked by traumatic or continual smack-downs. (psyche-busters)
I had learned to use it for creativity and introspection but luckily I released myself only through accomplishments and finding & performing joyous activities. Physical exertion/motion is mandatory imo.

That has worked for me for 5 years. (It may not work for everyone and its not anything better than anyone else’s success story. Diet, meds, NFG, electro-shock, lobotomy, hormone, lottery etc.)

I tried a couple different meds first and they made me numb and UNme. eventually, suicidal tendencies magnified when I flushed them away cold turkey.
They worked, yet not 100% right for me. I am not lobbying against them. More people have success with them than not.
But if you are on them, ONLY get off of them with a doctor’s council.

edit to add specifics.
I ride for joy. Travel and post and speak of my trips with people. Meet and share stories with strangers and people back home. Winter, I hike, camp. Mostly all these accomplishments are solo. I never feel loneliness because I get to share these over and over. Goals included certain destinations, unplanned meanderings, seeking gems of people and sights, I love my job, even goal of BMI Normal accomplished this year.
I can’t wait for tomorrow!

my 2-cent with a morning coffee.

with joy/without hate

[Author]

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