Good afternoon.
Hello to all – new member here. My story – married, late 40’s, two little kids.
Backstory – never dated much. Never did the homecoming or prom thing in HS, college did fine but never dated. Always been a little bit of a loner. My first real relationship was in my late 20’s with a cute, petite blond – mutual female friend fixed us up. Lasted six months, then for the next five years (into my mid 30’s), never went out on a single date (note that I never dated much before, so I wasn’t one of those guys who went from girl to girl). Had a buddy that I hung with (he never dated much either nor had a GF), and we’d play lots of sports, go to lots of sporting events, shoot lots of pool, and drink lots of beer. It was the good life – had a good job, no nagging woman to deal with, had money, and a buddy to hang out with. We were able to go to some big-time sporting events, and all in all I had it made.
Then, go to a party with that buddy and other friends, and the worst happens – he meets a woman there who becomes his wife (as an aside, to this day nobody likes his wife – she’s very annoying). Once I realize that he’s dating this woman and it’s getting serious, I panic and start internet dating (now I’m in my mid 30’s). Meet some women, and had a couple that I went out with for a little bit, but nobody marriage material. Had one woman that I met who was divorced with a few kids – the sex was great with her but there was no way that I would have married her as she had major baggage. Once I broke off from her (that one lasted a few months), went out on a date with the woman that is now my wife (she was divorced a couple of years, no kids). We seemed to hit it off, and we got physical right away (big mistake). About a year and a half in, decide to get married and build a house, so we get married two years after we met.
Fast forward about 15 years – now pushing 50, we have two little kids, and for the past several years I can’t stand to be around her most of the time. When the kids were in the late baby to toddler stage, she was the biggest pain in the ass – always on my ass about how I could do nothing right (kids, driving, etc). I’d hate coming home from work as I knew that I’d catch hell about something (one major mistake that I made in this time was not pushing back on her – I mistakenly thought that if I did, it would make things worse, but I was certainly wrong). She’s not as bad now (I have pushed back some in the meantime, although not as much as I should), but now I fantasize about being single and doing whatever the hell I want to do.
Last summer, she was gone for several days on a trip with friends, and it was great – just the kids and me having a good time without mommy around. That told me all I needed to know. I knew that, because I always take the kids places without her, as it’s much more enjoyable, but needed the reinforcement.
As for sex life, lucky to do it once a year. Truth be told, she’s overweight and lazy (she’s not obese, but could lose a bunch) – she talks a good game about losing weight, but as usual with her, there’s no action.
Sorry for the rambling post – she’s not here now, and just want to get stuff off of my chest. Those of you who think you’d like to get married, DON’T. As much as I love my kids, I’ve actually had dreams about where I’d be now if I was single – have a nice condo, good job (I do own my own business), and do whatever the hell I want. DO NOT GET MARRIED – can not emphasize this enough. There’s a lot more, but that’s it for now.
Thanasi 2 years, 12 months ago.
