Divorce advice

[ForeverDoneParticipant 2928]

CPT Obvious wrote:

She waited till Friday night, day I got paid, cleaned out bank account. Saturday morning I got a knock on the door and was handed a restraining order and a divorce petition an inch thick:

Sole custody of children. I was only to see them 3 hours a month in the presence of police. I had to turn in my guns to police immediately. Could not go near house or school. Alimony in amount of $3000/month for life plus child support. 50% Payment from my
pension/401K with the actual amount available doubled. The house, everything in it, her car, half payment on value of my car, her lawyer fees, payment in areats for (fictitious) mistress, and on and on.

Wow. Just wow. I just cannot imagine even doing that to my ex-bitch; much less another human. If I may ask, what did the bitch get?

[RomulusParticipant 4667]

If in ANY way possible, try and explain to your soon to be ex that getting lawyers involved only ensures that you BOTH lose. Both lawyers will drag it out for as long as possible, while taking in the dough.

My ex and I both started out with attorneys. After they had drained us both of about 5 grand total, I asked my soon to be ex if she wanted to try and work out the property settlement ourselves. She was skeptical. So, I said, maybe let me work up a proposal and I’ll give it to you and if you think its reasonable then lets talk. I then divided it up as follows. One for me and two for her. Once she saw it, she settled down a bit, we talked. I stroked her by telling her how fair she was being about the whole thing. What did I get out of it. No claim on any of my future earnings. I bought my freedom.

How can a woman be expected to be happy with a man who insists on treating her as if she were a perfectly normal human being.

[MonkParticipant 16975]

Romulus wrote:

I stroked her by telling her how fair she was being about the whole thing. What did I get out of it. No claim on any of my future earnings. I bought my freedom.

Appealing to her ego, her greed, and her shortsightedness.

Clever!

[MonkParticipant 16975]

2icebitten wrote:

2. What are the best ways to protect my assets? 3. How do I protect my personal property, retirement and investments?

Start gently skimming your accounts. Buy gold, pay cash. Keep this and cash in a secure location.

Bodycam, other concealed cameras. If things have reached this stage, she will probably be aware that things are not going well.

Women usually strike first, so you need to get things rolling before she dials 911 and/or hits you with legal paperwork.

[SESQUI ano estParticipant 2534]

For all the jokes about Canadastan someone in your position in Canada would not have had to pay jack f~~~in’ s~~~ to this whore. Two and a half years of marriage at your age with your history wouldn’t have got her jack s~~~. That she is even considering taking more from the relationship than she brought in (assuming you have no kids) is stunning to me. My split happened after 26 years so I don’t have much to offer to you other than sneak out of this relationship with as small a loss of assets as possible. That she would be entitled to anything after 2 and half years of marriage and no kids is f~~~ing shocking. For the lurkers out there all I can say is start planning your exit now. If I had left my wife 5, 10, 15, 20 or even 25 years sooner I would have been so much better off. Why the f~~~ would anyone get married a second time!

Everyday above ground is a good one. Everyday above ground while single...better still.

[WolfParticipant 890]

Anonymous wrote:

I blew through $300,000 in a 6 year high conflict deal. we were In court every week for 6 years

This is the important thing to heed. Don’t get too wrapped up in “winning” at all cost. Don’t spend $20K in legal fees to save $10K.

If you’re the bread winner in a marriage, you’ll be the one paying. It’s as simple as that. No point in “selling the farm” just to delay the inevitable. I don’t like it, but that’s how it is; hence, why you should NEVER marry.

You now find yourself in a divorce, and you’ll likely find that a tea spoon of honey will get you further than a gallon of gas.

[MattNYCParticipant 2329]

Dude this sucks. Sorry to hear.

First thing my lawyer told me was to record the conversation when i told the x i was divorcing her. A recording wouldn’t keep me out of jail when she called 911 for the fake DV claim, but the recordings could get me out in a week.

That’s when i realized i was in for a real s~~~show.

Smart thing #1 that i did: got a lawyer.
Smart thing #2 that i did: found a divorce support group for men only. Helpful.
Smart thing #3 that i did: never f~~~ing get married again!

[John WickParticipant 165]

2icebitten wrote:

For those who have been through the hell of divorce recently, what would you have done differently?

I would have kept my mouth shut at all costs. Take it as a Miranda warning – Anything you say WILL be held against you in a Court of Law. Period.

Don't ever get married. Find a woman you fucking HATE and buy her a house. It's cheaper and easier.

[equalism42Participant 23]

I think if your the male in the marriage you will be paying….forget bread winners. If at all possible get what liquid assets you can and run. My mistake was to try and save my farm and buy the bitch out, and since I could not move the farm I was a sitting target for solicitors to take caviates against etc.

If it goes to court I was stitched up by what is called a ‘open offer’ in which she offered me 20% and she would get 80% in her second property settlement six years after decree nesis or what ever it is called. If I had not taken the offer I would then be saddled with all her legal costs.

The best thing I ever did was to take out a intervention order against the bitch, it stopped her bugging me or making my life difficult, people were able to right off her lies as sour grapes and best of all it stopped her giving me a criminal record in taking out a intervention order against me which I’m sure she would have just to be a bitch!

[ronnyquestParticipant 156]

2icebitten wrote:

For those who have been through the hell of divorce recently, what would you have done differently?

What steps to take while thinking about and/or preparing for divorce?
1. what data should I be collecting about her to insure the most equitable settlement? (we have been married 2 1/2 years. She quit work when we married and is now on social security. I am primary source of income for household.)
2. What are the best ways to protect my assets?
3. How do I protect my personal property, retirement and investments?
4. How to find the best lawyer to represent me?

I appologize if this topic has been already covered.

I got lucky, but I also approached it like any other form of warfare.

Document everything; this includes recording her screaming fits, questionable behaviors, and suspicious receipts.
Find the best lawyer you can and follow his advice; ask other attorneys who they’d recommend.
Disclose everything.
Never, ever lose your cool with her.

Do not wait to strike till the iron is hot; but make it hot by striking! -- William Butler Yeats

[mackiavelicParticipant 226]

i know im not exactly helping by saying this but the only thing i can think of is how did you got to a mindset that made you think it was a good idea to marry someone that had already divorced twice , aka a woman that has zero concept of loyalty ?? wish you luck but cant say you were very bright back then… not knowing about mgtow isnt an excuse for that either … i would almost say its common sense …

[boom_bosticParticipant 10]

I can tell you a few things that I learned from my divorce trial.

#1. Immediately file for a separation of financial responsibilities. This is not the exact legal term but your lawyer will know what this is. It’s basically saying that any debt that she occurs from this date is hers & bears you no legal responsibility. Very important.

#2. Lie wherever & whenever you can during the trial.

-What I mean by this is be smart about what you reveal. Most evidence during divorce trials is word of mouth (or your written testimony). I went into trial with extremely accurate financial disclosures. I told the court exactly what money I had in my 401k, my checking & savings accounts, how much I had invested in stocks, how much equity I had in my home, how much my vehicles were worth…etc.
My wife (now ex-wife) comes in with a chicken scratch financial disclosure that greatly understated her worth. We had recently bought her a brand new Maxima that was at least worth 20k & she listed it 10k. She left off her 401k & said she had no checking or savings. She also had taken credit cards out after our separation that I had to help pay off. The judge accepted all this as fact &; it left me looking like I was unequally wealthy. When I should’ve lied about how much my 401k was worth, how much equity my home had…etc. because she wouldn’t have had any proof otherwise.

#3. Stop having sex with her.

#4. Be extra nice, play supporting beta.

#5 Try to draw on her motherly sympathies. Make her feel sad for you. Make her think your life is garbage without her. You definitely don’t want her knowing you’re living the bachelor life.

I’m sure I have more but this thing is already long enough.

[HeadbangerParticipant 410]

Do you know what a dirty trick is? Consult with all the best divorce attorneys in the state so the ex-c~~~ fan’t get a good divorce attorney.

She asked "Describe our relationship using only two words." I said "Our what!"

[Chris BurnettParticipant 122]

I’m here, I’m listening. Preparing for this battle my damn self.

I like math, see: the cost of raising a child > child support payment$ = A bitch getting hit in the face with a reality brick!!

[HermitParticipant]

Romulus wrote:

If in ANY way possible, try and explain to your soon to be ex that getting lawyers involved only ensures that you BOTH lose. Both lawyers will drag it out for as long as possible, while taking in the dough.

My ex and I both started out with attorneys. After they had drained us both of about 5 grand total, I asked my soon to be ex if she wanted to try and work out the property settlement ourselves. She was skeptical. So, I said, maybe let me work up a proposal and I’ll give it to you and if you think its reasonable then lets talk. I then divided it up as follows. One for me and two for her. Once she saw it, she settled down a bit, we talked. I stroked her by telling her how fair she was being about the whole thing. What did I get out of it. No claim on any of my future earnings. I bought my freedom.

Fortunately, my x was experienced in divorce and she new how expensive and nasty it could be, so we shared a lawyer. (I had consulted with one on the side that she didn’t know about just in case.) He was the cheapest one in town and we split the fee. I took what was mine and left what was hers. We agreed to $200.00/month child support which lasted less than a year, ending on my son’s 18th birthday. Then, it was finally over. No more ties to her legally or financially.

I reckon I got off very easy. My freedom is now only costing me a new house payment. It’s very much worth it.

The evil in women’s hearts leaves them no moral bounds as to inhibit them from descending to the lowest levels of darkness to acquire their self entitled desires.

[Space CowboyParticipant 1466]

The fact she’s had two divorces previously means she knows how to play the game really well.

Everything you say or do around her act as if you are being videod or recorded, you just might be.

Good luck and God speed.

"Have you ever thought about any real freedoms? Freedom from the opinions of others...even from the opinions of yourself?"

[Nags4CashParticipant 1163]

I’ve heard tales of a guy with really good friends selling his business and other property to friends for a cheap but reasonably court believable price, then buying it back. Still losing half of the selling value potentially, but depending on what you can get away with on price it could tilt things in your favor and protect future earnings of a business.

As usual check with a lawyer on that

Murph ~ There is nothing brave or manly about entering into a contract with somebody which allows them to take your money, assets, children, and decades of your future income on a mere whim.

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