Disappointing Your Family By Being MGTOW

[QuellParticipant 2538]

One of the hardest things for me personally on my red pill journey is disappointing my parents.

My parents have always been very supportive of me and overall I had a good childhood. I see my folks about once a month and mom always hounds me about if I dating etc… She keeps me telling me “I just haven’t found the one yet.”

After many failed relationships, I’ve let my parents know that I believe marriage to be rather risky and my views on divorce. My dad agreed with me and my mom just called me bitter.

I think one of the biggest issues I’m still having, at 32, is letting down my family in some way. My dad is 70 years old now and both of them want grandchildren. I know time is not on their side. It’s dumb but in some odd sense I feel like I’m not marrying and having kids is disappointing my family in a deep way. They want to experience grandkids in their golden years.

Part of being an adult is recognizing that your life is your own. You do not owe anybody an explanation for your life choices; even your family. That being said mentally it’s something that is in the back of my mind.

[Lone Wolf83Participant 825]

I’m in the exact same shoes as you being 33 however, I don’t let them phase me. I’ve learned to put my happiness before anyone else’s and that includes my parents. I just tell them I haven’t found the right one as a white lie and they keep off of me for some time.

If it has tits or tires, you know you're going to have problems.

[JB BooksParticipant 3182]

Clearly, it’s ridiculous to have children just to please your mom, so do the best you can to stay as low-key as possible on the subject.

We just don't realize life's most significant events while they're happening. Back then, I thought, "Well, there'll be other days". I didn't realize that that was the only day. - "Moonlight" Graham

[Ned TrentParticipant 4894]

Quell wrote:

My dad is 70 years old now and both of them want grandchildren

Well Quell, in ^^this^^ regard I guess that I can consider myself quite lucky, because my younger brother already turned my mom into a grand mom for some odd years, hence the pressure on me from her is much smaller (which is not to say that it’s completely gone but still…) then again the older both my brother and I get the more I tend to feel his envy towards me, even though at this point he doesn’t exactly know that I am a MGHOW, but his resentment/envy towards me still keeps growing by the year…

Ahh well…

I'd rather die a natual death with a clear MGTOW conscience somewhere off the grid than one within "modern" civilisation with a big stress mark on my forehead and a couple of dozen tubes plugged into my body. Back to the plantation..? Me..? Hey, literally: I won't ever fucking kid myself...YZERLMNTSIC

[Anonymous 7]

At some point you will realize that your family needs to be punted too.

Not all of them of course, just the demanding poochie ones that will not let you live your life in peace or the ones that want to tax your resources.

If they are c~~~s the need to be punted. Blood or no.

[X11Spectator 4520]

The problem is you are dashing your parents chance at immortality by their genes being propagated through your children. For some it makes their life meaningless. That’s why they invested in you.

If you are the only male or only child you have caused the extinction of your genetic line.

That’s hard to take for normies.

[reg22Participant 116]

Lone Wolf83 wrote:

They want to experience grandkids in their golden years.

I think their minds are in the 80s, when they were near 30yo. Everything changed. They think you can have kids and they grow with you… no.. to tell you the truth, it’s more probable that if you have kids, you’ll pay alimony and nether you nor your parents would be able to visit the kids.

[Anonymous 3]

X11 wrote:

you are dashing your parents chance at immortality by their genes being propagated through your children.

There is no way people will be conscious of “immortality of genes”! The family name? Perhaps…

But what really is going on is the emotional need of the “normal family”, of “how it is supposed to be”, and looking for an emotional thrill. Its real life soap opera for the old age, while it is the hard reality for the young.

THEY KNOW, in fact they will state repeatedly “I have suffered enough with you!” Yet they would push for grandsons, maybe as a kind of revenge, maybe for more spice in life, but certainly not for your interest.

As always, we should not expect others (not even parents) to defend your interests when in conflict with their own.

[X11Spectator 4520]

They won’t be conscious of immortality but will feel they have achieved in a weird symbolic way while they live.

[Anonymous 3]

If they really gave a s~~~, they would have found a young virgin woman for you while you were young and in your awkward years, gotten a marriage done, and then fiercely defended it. Of course that didn’t happen.

It would never have happened, because as a young man you were broke. Nobody wants to admit this, but the vast majority of young men want to get married and it is women that steadfastly refuse that. Find me any high school male student, and I’ll show you a guy that would gladly marry one of his classmates.

So when I hear this tradcon bulls~~~, I have to roll my eyes and depending on the day I am completely ambivalent about it. I either find it something to be enraged about or I just don’t care or am happy it didn’t happen, because truth is marriage sucks for men even at young ages and it would have been a trap.

But to not even give that option, and we know all young men are being thoroughly mocked for not being sexually attractive or having the interest of women, then turning around and waiting for these men to hit middle age and now be considered attractive with these used up women, it just strikes me as sheer audacity to smugly attack the men at both age ranges in two contradictory methods.

Young men are reviled as rapists and creeps, thirsty and desperate and the young women have to put up with their unwanted advances. The men are consistently called losers and attacked. Women scream rape and harassment non-stop and mock young men constantly. It’s obviously false charges, but society refuses to admit that and instead claims the women are innocent victims and the men are just evil thirsty rapist creeps.

And then in middle ages, these same women demand marriage and attraction from men that clearly no longer have an interest in them. This contradiction is not called out. The idea that women are being raped and harassed is still held. They won’t admit that clearly the women are more forceful at that age than the men, and the men are being harassed. Women should be constantly thrown in jail in their middle ages because the idea that men are harassing or raping them is so absurd at that point. But it doesn’t happen. Society won’t admit the inherent contradiction. Society instead chooses open misandry and to spin it whichever way it wants as a leaf twists in the wind.

There are consequences for all actions, and the truth can’t just be spun. Sure the consequences may take decades to manifest, but they simply can not be thrown away because it has become inconvenient. There simply must be a backlash to misandry, and the middle aged women and the current young women simply have to bear the brunt of their just desserts. There is no other way to do this.

[Anonymous 2]

At least your dad is understanding. Your mom obviously would not because she is a woman, and so has no idea what it is like to be treated like a man in divorce court. Women will always put their own self interests first, even if it means their son getting put in a bad position where he can lose all of his money and assets, as well as his parental rights. All the woman has to do is make one false accusation, and the man is screwed. No woman will ever understand what it is like to be in that position, because the system is rigged completely in her favor.

[Secret Agent MGTOWParticipant 22508]

You won’t disappoint your dad it sounds.

Tell your mom if she is willing to pay out of her pocket for your eventual divorce and home loss and child support and alimony, and you get all the cash up front so you can put in an irrevocable trust, and every time your wife gives you s~~~, your mom will take the phone call to deal with it herself,

You might be open to marrying someone.

Don’t worry your mom won’t agree, you won’t have to marry.

Your mom will say that all that stuff comes along with marriage, its just the way it is.

The proper answer to that is “mom, I am not a masochist.” Yet she wants you to self-harm yourself.

Women want everything, but want responsibility and accountability for nothing.

[Secret Agent MGTOWParticipant 22508]

Don’t assume. His mom could easily know how men are treated by courts in divorce, and believe if that happens it always is the guys fault and he deserves it for messing things up for the woman. She would feel this way about strange men, and if she divorced, his dad, and likely him to. She called him bitter for not wanting to get married already. The freaking hive sticks together.

Women want everything, but want responsibility and accountability for nothing.

[HermitParticipant 1121]

It’s all been said. Never sacrifice yourself on the altar of other people’s expectations. Mom will just have to cope.

I don't hate women. I just feel better when they're not around.

[foghornleghornParticipant 3449]

Your parents will love you regardless but your life is one you have to live and it is a path you need to walk. Your parents were married in a different time and a different environment. That is all your mother knows and she thinks that it is still that way.

[Anonymous 42]

Better MGTOW than satisfying the culture being a SLAVE-TOW!

Family’s dead anyway, the man is just a wallet for the state owned and operated single mother household!

[Heave-Ho MgtowParticipant 1797]

My mom quit asking after a perfect response. “Are you seeing anyone”. Me – hell no, the last thing I need right now is to try and please a damn women. Dad said not a word… but that was priceless

skip the cavernous vag and go your own way

[MattNYCParticipant 2329]

Would you accept this repeated bulls~~~ from anyone other than your family?

I’m with Grue on this one:

Anonymous wrote:

At some point you will realize that your family needs to be punted too.

Family doesn’t get to be s~~~ty just because they’re family. Family should be a higher standard than anyone else, not the opposite.

[Soldier-MedicParticipant 2566]

Quell wrote:

I feel like I’m not marrying and having kids is disappointing my family in a deep way. They want to experience grandkids in their golden years

A constraining set of feelings.

Reality. When my ex and I had kids. Her parents and grandparents loved it. The odd thing was that when we left their houses, they made sure we had all of our kids with us.

Do they want grand children or do they want YOU to have grand children?

"I asked you a question. I didn't ask you to repeat what the voices in you head are telling you" ~ Me. ........Yes I'm still angry.

[Sky-OParticipant 18934]

My family disappointed me, long before I was MGTOW.

[Author]

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