Home › Forums › MGTOW Central › Blood boiling with rage. Never thought I had it in me.
Tagged: anger, emotions, healthy anger, rage
This topic contains 30 replies, has 20 voices, and was last updated by Anonymous 3 years, 8 months ago.
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Guys, have you ever had your blood boiling with rage? Just wanted to share one of the most intense experiences of my life. Maybe you had something similar you wanted to share. I don’t think I ever told anyone about this before.
Here’s a little preface. I can’t call myself hotheaded, but I’ve been into fights and lost teeth, done stupid s~~~. Normally I don’t like violence and am a pacifist in general. I never watched MMA or boxing much because I get all tense and it’s not pleasant to me. There was one time (long time ago) when I was too drunk and a girl started shaming me and talking about my mom – I gave her a couple of bruises I don’t remember giving her. I woke up and I saw her face bruised – I didn’t remember and couldn’t believe
I was capable of it, but it was true. Ever since then I was really careful with my anger. Decade later I had to go to anger management classes for the court. I tried to take it seriously just to make sure I wouldn’t lose my temper in any situation.So this story took place about 4 years back was when I was still married to my ex wife, but I suspected she was cheating, we haven’t been talking at all and things were going to an end. But we still lived in the same house at the time.
At that point I was pretty calm and reserved. I told her we could try to mend things, but she wasn’t responding or admitting anything. I lived downstairs and she lived upstairs.
So we didn’t talk and she would come and go. Our daughter was staying with my mom overseas until we figured out what’s going on.
It was about 11pm on Friday or Saturday, and I heard the front door slam. Whatever I told to myself – I don’t care about where that bitch goes. So I went and poured myself another beer from my kegerator. I went downstairs not giving a f~~~. I live in suburbs so I have this really short driveway. If I look out of ingress windows of the basement and a car is parked in front of my backyard pretty well.
I took a look from the window and I saw my wife dressed up as a go-go dancer get into this guys’s SUV and start tongue kissing right in front of my house. She knew I was home, he probably knew it too.
My hair stood up and blood started boiling. I turned into an animal. I took a camcorder and a baseball bat, turned it on and started approaching the vehicle. My frontal cortex at that time had no blood coming to it whatsoever- I was just an animal. I don’t think I could feel my body at all – it was like I was floating. This feeling – I can’t even describe it – it was primal, it was very intense. I was ready to dismantle things with bare hands – it was like a shot of adrenaline in the heart.
And the guy was my wife’s height – a hipster midget how I called him. I could have probably killed him or them both. But because this whole moment lasted enough time – half way down the driveway my bigger brain started to ring an alarm, and I turned around and went back. Thanks God it turned out that way.They have been married for more than a year now, but I never said hi to him or talked to him. I can’t treat him as nothing happened knowing that he was f~~~ing my wife and knew she was married with children. He’s a total mangina and I’m happy for them. Thanks to God and court ordered anger management which I think planted the right seeds in me – I didn’t go berserk on these two people out of my pride and animalistic instincts. Or I’d probably do time in prison right now or even worse.
Never go ballistic guys. It’s not worth it.
And I don’t think I will ever knowingly f~~~ someone’s wife. Never done it and never will. Can’t do it. Call me old-fashioned. When something f~~~ed up happens to you – you don’t want it to happen to anyone else. Or maybe I just want to have this little piece of integrity to keep my mind straight.proud carrier of the 'why?' chromosome
Thanks for sharing.
Love is just alimony waiting to happen. Visit mgtow.com.
It’s been my experience that in some Twisted way women get a real kick out of us twisting in the Wind. In the more crazy we get the more they like it and the more they continue to push and push and push. If you mix alcohol with the ups and downs of a relationship especially with an abusive woman like the one you’re with we’re looking for all kinds of trouble. I’m so glad you got out of that f~~~ing deal. I know you probably still got to talk to her because of your kid but that’s okay you can handle your s~~~. When I first filed for divorce I had to live in the house with my ex-wife 2 and it was a f~~~ing bitch because she had a gun. She was to text my eldest daughter periodically that she hoped I would come in her bedroom so she could shoot me. Keep your head keep your freedom
Always expect the unexpected and gird your loins appropriately. It's a no-fault jungle out there.
Guys, have you ever had your blood boiling with rage?
I’ve had moments of extreme anger in the past. Moments I’m sure go well past mere rage. Moments that seemed to give me enhanced mental and physical abilities while leaving me absolutely drained afterward. I’ve had moments where my vision has tunneled out, all colors drained away, time seem to slow down, and my chosen target stood out in a hyper-focus while everything else faded away.
I don’t know what I looked like or how I behaved in those moments, but I know what my enemies looked like and how they behaved when they saw me.
Never go ballistic guys. It’s not worth it.
Thank for your sharing that with us, Russky. Your honesty is something we’d see from a woman.
The important lesson to learn is that you not only acknowledged that rage occasionally controlled you, but that you also took steps to prevent it from ever controlling you again. A woman would have never admitted she had a problem nor would she have exhibited the personal responsibility necessary to fix the problem.
Do not date. Do not impregnate. Do not co-habitate. Above all, do not marry. Reclaim and never again surrender your personal sovereignty.
I know you probably still got to talk to her because of your kid but that’s okay you can handle your s~~~.
“Hi”, “What time you’re coming to pick her up?”, “Does she need any extra clothes?”, “Bye” – that’s pretty much all the communication we have with XW.
P.S. I wrote this topic also to chime in on the idea of knowingly f~~~ing somebody’s wifes and the implications of it. I’ve been thinking about it a lot. I am not a goody-two-shoes myself, and it’s everyone’s own choice to make. But I don’t think I would have done it. Especially if one of the reasons she wants to f~~~ you – is to make her husband angry – bait him to fight you. You don’t want to go there – being a pawn in a woman’s game – is the worst place you can be in.
I don’t know what this guy was thinking making out with my wife in front of my house, and I know it was probably her idea all along – she wanted to test/hurt me as much as possible for some reason. but he’s one dumb mofo – who wasn’t afraid of dying. I think one of the things that made me turn around – was realizing how small he was compared to me. I had a thought he doesn’t stand a chance. Thinking of this in retrospect – if he was some thug-looking guy my size or larger – I’d probably jump him.
I understand it’s woman’s nature to bait one guy with the other hoping they would fight each other, but in the civilized western society – it just doesn’t work like that.
This was probably the worst insult I ever received so far. But now I’ve been seasoned. She wanted me to fight for her cheating useless ass? F~~~ no! I value freedom much more. Have fun with each other, I’m outP.S.S.: What’s most remarkable with this story – is that before it happened – I was convinced the case was done I had no feelings left for her whatsoever. I mean – it was over. I didn’t want to see her, I didn’t want to touch her. She was in a hospital and I couldn’t care less. So I was not ready for the reaction that I had. It was completely primal. There was this last button in my soul she could still press that I didn’t know of – and once she did – booy-oh-boy. It all came back rushing in a millisecond.
proud carrier of the 'why?' chromosome
Good post.Thanks.Anger is really tough to deal with at times.
P.S. I wrote this topic also to chime in on the idea of knowingly f~~~ing somebody’s wifes and the implications of it.
I f~~~ed another man’s wife. Unwittingly, although that’s no real excuse.
It was the 90s and I was traveling for a living. By traveling, I mean drop of a hat, suitcase packed at all times, walk in the office Monday be on a jet before lunch, travel. I had friends and a social circle of sorts, but I was always on the fringe if you know what I mean. I’d be home one weekend, gone for a couple of weeks, home again for a while, then gone again, wash, rinse, repeat.
My circle hung at a few local bars and that’s where I met Christine. She was in her early twenties, brunette, had nice set of t~~~, didn’t seem to take anything too seriously, and fun in the sack. In other words, right in my wheelhouse. I f~~~ed her the second time we met and, still being a naive blue pill douchebag, thought I was doing pretty good.
We’d hook up every weekend I was in town and a few weeknights too. She always met me some place, told me she was divorce, and that she had a young daughter. The “relationship” lasted as long as it did because I was out of town 75% of the time.
Her lies eventually added up. I confronted her, she tried a couple of fallback lies like how her divorce wasn’t final yet or her husband had moved out. Furious now, I kept up the pressure until she confessed that she was still married, still living with her husband, and her husband had been home taking care of their child every time she’d been f~~~ing me.
I was physically ill when she finally told me the truth. I didn’t trust myself to speak to her and simply showed her out of my apartment. All the usual bulls~~~ followed; letters, phones calls, showing up at my door, telling me about other men, etc. She even showed up once at the bar while I was there with a team jersey so short she was showing “under boobs”.
She disgusted me so much that I never even considered getting back together with her despite all her attempts. I even told the other guys at the bar how she’d lied and that she was married, not that that stopped some of them from f~~~ing her. Eventually it all stopped when she cracked up her car drunk, broke her arm, and had to stop barhopping for a while. The poor bastard she was married to took that opportunity to move her out of state.
She did me one huge favor however; she was the woman who put me firmly on road to the Red Pill. I’d been partially Red Pill before thanks to my Navy days, but she was the one thing that pushed me past the tipping point more than any other.
Thanks for teaching me about what women are really like, you despicable c~~~.
Do not date. Do not impregnate. Do not co-habitate. Above all, do not marry. Reclaim and never again surrender your personal sovereignty.
Moments that seemed to give me enhanced mental and physical abilities while leaving me absolutely drained afterward. I’ve had moments where my vision has tunneled out, all colors drained away, time seem to slow down, and my chosen target stood out in a hyper-focus while everything else faded away.
Exactly the feeling! Plus you stop feeling your own legs and body – it’s like a first person shooter video game – you move forward, your head is bobbing, but you have no feeling in your lower half of the body – it’s like you’re floating through the air while your legs take turns being dragged behind and then thrown forward interchangeably.
It’s very hard to think in that state, but the feeling of cold jail cell was still vivid with me, so it brought me back to senses.proud carrier of the 'why?' chromosome
She did me one huge favor however; she was the woman who put me firmly on road to the Red Pill. I’d been partially Red Pill before thanks to my Navy days, but she was the one thing that pushed me past the tipping point more than any other.
Thanks for teaching me about what women are really like, you despicable c~~~.
Yeah. I wrote this topic after reading the intro by @nil Disperandum where he also said he started turning red pill after f~~~ing someone’s wife
proud carrier of the 'why?' chromosome
Guys, have you ever had your blood boiling with rage?
Yes. But I don’t have a violent bone in my body. I was in 2 physical “fights” in my life.
Don’t laugh. I was just a kid and this s~~~ mattered back then:
When I was 7, there was a “bully” who lived down the street who terrorized me on the way to school. I walked to school until the 6th grade. Afraid to leave the house. My Mom always gave me s~~~ advice. “Just ignore him”, “he’s just jealous” and other passive s~~~. My Dad finally said “hit him. Hit him hard. Once and good”. He said if I punched him hard enough he’ll be too shocked that I even stood up for myself at all.
One day, this same 8 year old asshole (still remember his name) blocked me and wouldn’t let me pass. It was about to get real. I punched him in the face and spun him around like Marty knocked out Biff in BackToTheFuture. He fell down and f~~~in’ ran home crying. It was such a triumphant feeling (although my hand was wrecked) but when I saw that movie , I knew exactly what it felt like.
Didn’t know I had it in me either. Never hit anyone with my fist since.
2. I was teased alot in grade school because instead of hockey or sports, I went to piano, violin and German school classes. I was challenged to an after-school fight in the 5th grade. (I remember his name too). I don’t know where it came from, but somehow I was coerced into this fight in the schoolyard…. and there was an audience of at least 15 or 20 other kids. I was on my bike facing this jerk and told him I didn’t want to fight him.
He came up to me, I pulled my bike up to hit him in the face with my front wheel. Like rearing a horse. Knocked him down and then I slammed my front wheel down on his head ripping a patch of hair out of his head. I will never forget it. He wore a toque (knit hat) for a while after that.
I was not built for that s~~~ but it did surprise even myself – twice.
Nobody bothered me anymore.Never thought I had it in me.
There have been a few days where I said to myself, “if someone held me at gunpoint right now or tried to car-jack me, I would break their neck with my bare hands. So I hope for their sake nobody p~~~es me off today.”
I kept that thought to myself.
If you keep doing what you've always done... you're gonna keep getting what you always got.I saw my wife dressed up as a go-go dancer get into this guys’s SUV and start tongue kissing right in front of my house. She knew I was home, he probably knew it too.
T~~~s do their best to make you care.
When i dumped my first girlfriend she tried her absolute best to make me care.
She even followed me into the goddamn club ,waited for me to go into the wc and sat specifically on the place where i sat.
The plan is when i return is should see her “randomly” tongue kissing a guy right on the place where i sit.
I was slightly p~~~ed that they took my seat, told them to f~~~ off and everything went fine.(i like my seat)
If you don’t have kids there isn’t really much they can do to hurt you.And when they can’t hurt you they fall apart.Never go ballistic guys. It’s not worth it.
This might sound strange coming from me but totally agree.
If you get angry let your anger be you.
If you go ham you go ham to defend yourself or someone you care for.(at least this is the plan..)She was to text my eldest daughter periodically that she hoped I would come in her bedroom so she could shoot me. Keep your head keep your freedom
By the gods… how did your kid respond to that?!
"One of the best things internet exposed is just how insane women are." - Freeman_K
Anonymous42S~~~ Rusky, you almost went Chernobyl!
You gotta look at women a little differently, they know their power of attraction and use it to hone in on a guy she can manipulate. When a husband hones in on her manipulations and games, he becomes aware of her tricks and starts making his counter moves, by this time she sick of playing her own underhanded game of chess, where she drops the pieces in her fits of anger to distract you from her devious cheats.
The infidelity I was involved in, they jumped on me like monkeys! I was single (and u-know-guys) vulnerable to little head thinking! I never cheated on a girlfriend in spite of any offers!
Shortly after my spontaneous MGTOW a girls mother I knew (married) made moves on me in my own bedroom after dropping off some paperwork. She got the usher-bums-rush out of my house and that’s the last time I saw her, she moved away.Hey Rusky, women aren’t permanent anymore, they’re free to do whatever their hearts desire, and do so without any ramifications to her, all the negative outcomes are placed on you (the man), that’s why (for a man) commitment more than a 10minute dumpster f~~~ is out of the question.
Knowing a 10minute dumpster f~~~ is all most women are good for is what keeps me away, plus a whole bunch of diseases, bacteria, and “now” supper bugs!
Ya gotta look at them as chimpanzees, I do…
At the time she was texting me these messages at night forwarded from her mom saying that she was going to kill me. And of course my daughter was very worried about my safety and she knew how unstable her mother was and is. She is my first born and could not stand her mother she bonded with me instead which is a good thing for her except that her mother hated her for it and punished her I found out later. So how she handled it she drank, she was after all 26 at the time. We all do what we gotta do when will you deal with insane people.
Always expect the unexpected and gird your loins appropriately. It's a no-fault jungle out there.
Anonymous11Never go ballistic guys. It’s not worth it.
Sometimes it is. Let C-Pig share his first tale of corporate treachery.
My very first time ever being f~~~ed over in a corporate buyout had a cretin director order my supervisor to make a false review on me which was sent back for revision three times per his order to make it worse.
The day after a high revenue project I successfully developed was made turnkey this c~~~~~~~~~ walked into my office and dropped the bomb on me. I flatly told him this review was “bulls~~~, and he knew it.”. I refused to sign it. I was rewarded with a demotion and 40% pay cut. Had I known my state’s unemployment compensation laws I would have claimed that I quit under duress and filed a claim just to gall the owner. I had done pretty well investing so I could coast and used up all my sick hours and quit with no notice.
Fast forward nine months later, I was in between gigs back in school for degree number two being a total Striper (Striped Bass) bum and drinking in the middle of the day with my best friend. This prick walks into the bar with a gaggle of the management team from my former employer all of whom liked and respected me.
This sociopath had a really huge gut. I’m very extroverted and very entertaining in person. I had about 15 people hanging with us at the bar openly laughing and pointing at him mocking him.
He was a notorious bully to all so he started to approach me. I jumped from the bar stool in rage and began to confront him with vicious intent on my part. His eyes went from bully to total coward as he retreated. I then mocked the f~~~ out of him in front of his fellow managers after I made him back down before my rage. My friend was freaked out. I continued to f~~~ with him as my friend wisely escorted me from the bar.
After that, all of my lingering hatred towards him evaporated instantly forever. No amount of therapy could have done that for me. Sometimes rage is good.
One day, I may share what cured my rage from my second corporate buyout backstabbing, but this was literally the most surreal and incredible, controversial to some event that I’ve ever witnessed and frankly shocked me out of that rage. I later obtained video proof that things I see are real as this s~~~ went on for two months. Coincidentally, the friend who escorted me from that bar had a similar experience back in 1973.
Rage lies within us all. Just rage is healthy once eliminated.
I know my story is not female related, but corporations and women are what created this red pill monster both in tandem.
Damn this is a great thread.
Yes, I’ve felt my ‘blood boil’ – I know exactly what that phrase feels like – and though I am not a violent person, it’s gotten me into trouble. I went to the doctor just last week to see about finally dealing with some of my issues (including anger). He ran a bunch of tests to make sure I had no tumours etc, then put me on an exercise program, not meds.
Smart doctor.
Intense rage can be great. I’ve personally never went that high, not in fights (I haven’t had more than 5 in my life, and all were at school when I was between ages 13 and 16 after experiencing too much bullying for too long a time), not in random encounters, nothing. The only one who saw my seething rage was an ex-gf, the fat one I spoke of in my introduction. She saw simmering rage in my eyes whenever we walked around and some punks/douchebags started laughing and were ready to make some hurtful comments towards her because of her appearance. Apparently I scared them off so much they shut their mouths, looked down and passed us by without a whisper.
Know that I was a skinny f~~~ back then, with no strength worth mentioning, yet I managed to silence a group of 4 or 5 guys with one piercing gaze… It felt good to hear about that, knowing that I could overpower others with naught but a look, because in a fight I would most definitely lose.
I do get the rage at home every now and then at how unfair life is (once again, see intro about my neuro-celiac disease which leaves me home almost 24/7), yelling out in frustration, damning all the gods that might listen and punching out my frustration in my pillows… but other than that, no real rage.
"One of the best things internet exposed is just how insane women are." - Freeman_K
I know the feeling.
Back then when I was a young kid in grade 6 or 7, A blond kid around the same age picked on just the girls and a few weak boys. When this guy tired to pick on me by throwing rocks at me. I ended up grabbing him by the throat and started to choke the life out of him. I didn’t even think about anything at all, and even getting hit in the head or the stomach didn’t hurt at all.
I think this is when I was 13 at the time. After the punk pleading trying to tell me to stop. I snapped out of it, and let him go. After that, he no longer bullyed anyone anymore.
At grade 8, the same thing happened again. Three guys tried to pick on me because I ended up getting some attention from girls. Once again, for some reason I ended up losing what little sense I had, and proceed to pick up a log or something, and smashed it across the head of the f~~~wit and started to beat the life out of him. After 5 to 10 mins, I regain control, and all of his friends have left him behind. (And people wonder why I don’t have friends) He had to leave the camp, and was sent to the hospital to get stitches. I got away with it because no one cared enough to look into the situation.
At grade 10. A girl was picking on me everytime I didn’t say hi, or even cared to talk to her. When she blocked my locker door with her fatass pushing me around asking why I don’t want to talk to her.
At some point, I lost control again when she asked me about something stupid. I told her that I don’t talk to sluts that don’t know their head from their asses when a person clearly doesn’t like you for how you treat others, and said something along the lines “drop dead you slut or go f~~~ yourself you walking cum dumpster (that line I got from family guy or robot chicken” She ran off crying in the bathroom and missed classes on that day. I was supposed to go into the office, But I ended up ditching class on the same day when we had a sex ed lesson. I’m not going sit there and watch on how babies are made.
I already played doctor with my cousin at age 13 in calgary, it’s not hard to figure out what t~~~ and a pussy looks like, and that I’m supposed to stick in my dick in a meathole, and I looked up this crap a long time ago.
Waste of time. and no one cared that I ditched class. Canada is one f~~~ed up country, and the school system is a joke.
Now let me ask you guys. Where was the so called anti bully movement at when people got picked on. that’s right, not doing jack s~~~. I realized that in the moment, that while I do have the power to fight and even put a person in the hospital. That it’s no excuse for losing control like that.
That’s all I can say about that topic.
Actions have consequences and consequences have prices. Cause and effect at work.
Yes, I’ve gotten angry a few times but I’ve never had “intense rage” .
It might have something to do with the fact that I’m not a small dude and most trollops don’t get the notion to f~~~ with me.Great thread-
I’ve experienced rage several times in my life.
I never got physically violent, but I did do things I later regretted.I think women have an ability to manipulate men’s emotions.
Now, I watch for manipulation and just walk away if I see the slightest hint of manipulation.
Russky- I’ve always considered you to be a thoughtful person. All of us here have probably been manipulated by some chick to the point of losing it. You did OK. Thanks for sharing.
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