Accept Reality and Adapt

[Ever5Participant 1008]

I ended up in a conversation with a guy at the gym. He’s probably 50, never been married. Brought up some of my thoughts about how if a woman is under 30, she’s not looking for any form of a relationship. And his response, well most guys under 30 aren’t either. In today’s world, most people are focused on career and family is second.

That kind of hit me. You know that, that is just how it is.

I think MGTOW material is very valuable. But it’s still a perspective. And getting tunnel vision is never a good thing, whether that’s politics, religion, or ideologies.

Learn from it, and then figure out how to apply the new knowledge into the world.

Where does most of the suffering come from. I personally believe it’s from denial and false/unhealthy maps of reality. Then because of that, bad choices in life, and continuing to make those bad choices in life because of lack of understanding, lack of a useful map in which to navigate the world.

MGTOW offers a lot of extremely useful perspectives, based on science, that make a lot of sense. But to get stuck in it forever, and for it to be the only thing someone focuses on, well it’s just another form of tunnel vision. It’s like watching the news and seeing all the negative stuff and then being afraid to walk outside. Is that bad? Not at all. I think MGTOW producers need to keep doing exactly what they are doing. People need to know this stuff to stop being blind to the reality. People need a good dose of reality.

But, being engrossed in it, where all your interactions are based on this one thing, I don’t think it’s healthy, long term. Get a dose of it for a month or 3 and kind of wean off for a bit. Maybe come back for a month or 3, but being overly saturated with this stuff, it’s draining. Definitely think developing relationships with like minded people is a good and healthy thing, having people to talk to about it, very positive thing.

I’ve certainly learned a lot. My eyes have been opened, I can see things that I could never see before. I can understand my past more, past relationships, why they went wrong, things I chose to ignore that I will never ignore again, and what not.

Women are selfish creatures.
Hypergamy is real.
Long term, I think it’s a very bad idea to get married. There’s a conflict of interest, women have a significant advantage. I would not recommend playing that game.

But where does the pain come from… I think deep down, men desire to feel needed, significant, important. And in today’s society, women are not going to meet that need, at least not long term. And there’s plenty of women that will take advantage of a guy who wants to fill that need/void leaving him feeling worthless and unimportant.

It’s the modern world. A lot of women, do not want babies. If they do, it’s usually for a paycheck.

Most women who don’t want to be a burden, are usually focusing on their career. A lot of them have no plans to get married until at least after 30, I’d say late 30’s. And yeah, they’ve road plenty of dick along the way. Just gotta accept reality for what it is. These types of women, don’t want to get into a relationship because they think it will slow them down. And it may very well do just that.

Men and women have different standards when it comes to needs. I think most women feel the need for security. A lot of men feel the need for significance/importance. Women get their need for security fulfilled by government programs, their job with benefits/insurance, etc. Men have been replaced in that transaction.

Women just don’t really “need” men anymore to feel secure/safe/taken care of. And because of that, men are not going to ever feel needed, important, significant from a woman. It’s just not going to happen.

Basically, men have to adapt. Whatever your needs are, what ever you feel you need to feel or be on a regular basic, you’ve got to find away to diversify and get that outside of a relationship.

If you can’t do that, you will be left feeling drained and used up by a woman. There’s no reciprocity in that relationship of feeling important/needed/useful/etc in the eyes of a woman. That’s been replaced by government programs, work, benefits that she receives from that work, etc.

You’ve got to figure out how to get all this mess outside of a relationship. You’ve got to gain/discover your own independence, emotionally. And then once you discover that, you’ve got to guard it like your life depends on it.

With that being said, you’ve got to learn how to be OK being alone, not in a relationship. If you cannot do that, you will get f~~~ed. Simply because women don’t need you anymore. Women don’t “need” men, not in the same way. Being I think the biggest need of a woman for a man “was” security/safety etc. That’s been replaced and they don’t “need” a man for that anymore.

There is the imbalance.

You’ve got to figure out who to gain your independence, how to be OK with yourself, outside of women. Only then will you have any chance of equality. If you don’t have that, the woman will have a significant advantage. If you need signifance from her, but she doesn’t need security/safety from you. She’s going to feel drained because there is no reciprocity. So she’s going to jet out, and the one’s that stick around are going to drain you and use you up. And you’ll never get that need met for real because at the end up the day, she really doesn’t “need” you. Basically you’ve got to stop needing her.

You’ve got to be able to walk away without feeling any potential loss, at all times. If you can’t do that, she’s got the power, and being a woman, she will abuse it because it’s not natural for a woman to have the power. It’s not natural. It’s like the house dog is running the show. It’s not healthy and nothing good can come from it.

All that being said. All this stuff is real about women, AWALT all the way. Understand that.

But women are highly adaptive. And I learned this in the past. I went through this phase where I never called women, women only called me. You know what, they adapted. I didn’t even tell them that was how it was going to be, they just adapted. Instinctively, women are chameleons, thrive off of approval, it’s their survival instincts. If you know that, and know how to spot s~~~ty behavior and walk away from it, which is easy to do when you know that you will never be significant/important in the eyes of a woman. You just won’t. She doesn’t need a “man”, she really doesn’t. All the things men supplied, that made them needed, are now fulfilled by government programs, her job, etc.

But women still adapt.

And since learning all this stuff. Seeing women for what they are. Not expecting them to ever find me important, or needed, or anything. I’ve found myself having some positive interactions with women. They don’t seem to be jerking me around, because I know they don’t need me, and I know they’ll never see me as important, so I don’t even try. And from that, I’ve had some enjoyable conversations with women.

Would I ever commit to them. Of course not. I’m not needed. Commitment would be stupid and only a losing game. AWALT is the truth. But, because women are so adaptive, if you know all this stuff, and have accepted it and ingrained it, and are willing to walk away at the drop of a hat, I found women can be highly agreeable and positive interactions are possible.

And thinking of it. What kept a man from walking away. Deep down he wanted to feel important, and he was in denial that he wasn’t. At least that was me. Anytime the relationship got s~~~ty, I felt guilty about telling her to f~~~ off and walking away, in denial, thinking that she needed me. She doesn’t need a man.

So seeing that, don’t have to put up with her s~~~, don’t have to make any efforts in trying to feel needed/important, because you never will feel needed/important from a woman. It’s not happening. And with that said, all of sudden, there’s no expectation, there’s no reason to do anything other than what you want to do in the moment. You don’t have to go out of your way. Because going out of your way is completely pointless. Women do not need a man, and they know this, at least subconsciously.

With that, I find that women seem to behave a lot better around me than in the past before I ingrained all this information and understanding.

Don’t get married. Don’t go out of your way for a woman in any situation, she doesn’t need you anymore. Don’t get her pregnant, and all the other jazz… and I think it’s possible to have positive interactions with women, on a temporary basis. I certainly wouldn’t commit, in order to keep it as positive as possible, you’ve got to be willing to jet out of there very quickly. Again, that why you’ve got to gain your emotional independence and then guard that s~~~ with your life.

If you feel you “need” a woman, you are gonna get f~~~ed because she does not need you for anything.

Accept reality and adapt. Women are chameleons, if you got the right frame, and hold your power, women will behave better, at least temporarily. If you ever commit, not willing to walk away when it sucks, it’s out the door because she doesn’t need a man and there’s no way to keep her in check.

Truth has no place to live in the mind of a woman.

[CarnageParticipant 22113]

1) addaptation i a weak organism only alternative. Strong organisms don’t adapt BECOUSE THEY DONT GIVE A F~~~, there are not many strong organisms, but one example REPTILES, cocodriles didn’t evolve almost anything in 4000 years, why? THEY DONT NEED TO.

2) our pain is stupid, why? We are frustrated because relationship don’t work and bla bla bla. But they never did, is not real, what we want is a fairytale, you can not be depressed becouse you don’t have something that doesn’t exist, THAT IS STUPID. I wanna be Superman, but superman ain’t real, Soo I don’t wake up every morning sad becouse I’m not superman.

There is nothing to adapt to, there is no happy ever after, it’s all bulls~~~, JUST STOP CHASING DRAGONS.

Wake the f~~~ up.

Matrix “ don’t try to bend the spoon, that’s imposible, just learn the truth THERE IS NO SPOON”

To those following me, be careful, I just farted. Men those beans are killers.

[RedDawnParticipant 1391]

Great post, I agree with all of it, the tunnel vision, the channeling of my inherent need to feel needed, the chameleon like abilities of women, the lack of the need for me and the limitations of commitment. It’s quite refreshing to let go of this and not care whether or not I pass some stupid ‘s~~~ test’ and then walk away with NFG. I believe Esther Vilar discusses a lot of themes you brought up here in her book ‘The Manipulated Man.’

Courage is the key to life itself - Morgan Freeman

[CarnageParticipant 22113]

You need air, food, shelter, to take a s~~~, you don’t need women, like you don’t need a beer, alcohol is not food, it’s something totally unnecessary, women needed us becouse you where stronger and could built s~~~ and hunt easier.

But we never needed them, that’s why women where second class citizens in the past.

Now they also don’t need us, fair enough, but society needs them to reproduce, Soo they were granted a lot of privileges.

But I as an individual don’t need a women, I won’t die without a women, in best case scenario they are a liability. Just like a bottle of vodka, the problem is most men are pussy holic.

Just get over with it.

To those following me, be careful, I just farted. Men those beans are killers.

[Ever5Participant 1008]

Carnage wrote:

You need air, food, shelter, to take a s~~~, you don’t need women, like you don’t need a beer, alcohol is not food, it’s something totally unnecessary,

I agree with you. “Needs” is a new word for me, something I never understood until this last year. Whenever someone asked about my “needs” and getting my “needs” met, I would get very confused and agitated/insecure.

I grew up in an environment where my emotional needs were highly neglected. As in, needing someone to listen to me as a child, feeling accepted, things like that. We’re never met, so I grew up in a constant state of self neglect, which is also why I stuck around s~~~ty women. I didn’t know anything else.

Let me try to explain this idea as if I was speaking to myself a year ago.

“Needs” are based on emotion, they have nothing to do with survival. Humans have a need to socialize, this helps them feel ok about themselves. Maybe you have a need for someone to listen to, to talk to, this gives you an emotional outlet.

For example, some women need to feel dirty, like a slut, to feel ok with themselves.

Most people have a need to feel accepted by at least someone.

So security is an illusion, we could die at any second. So when a woman “needs” safety/security, it’s not the real thing but the illusion of safety/security… it’s the absence of feeling insecure, that she can’t survive and will die. But a lightning could strike anyone down at any moment. True security is an illusion.

So when I say men need to feel important, most men, to feel “OK” about life, feel the need for someone to believe they are important. Again, it’s an illusion, because life will go on without us, any of us, male or female. But while alive, humans have these “needs”, that are based on emotion. What do you need to feel emotionally OK about yourself.

Now here’s the thing. If someone was highly neglected, they become very resilient, they can function without their “needs” being met. They may not enjoy life, but they can function.

People who had a great childhood, usually cannot function that well, thy are addicted to them and thus, I believe, will never reach self actualization. They simply can’t, they are addicted to having these emotional needs met.

Like most women, they would panic without their need for security/safety and would literally crumble. So they “needed” a man.

So needs are about emotions, not reality. Like most men “need” to feel important to feel “ok” about themselves.

It’s emotional. And yeah, you can learn how to discover how to get these “needs” met internally. However that is quite difficult and if it was achieved, I would refer to that individual, a man because I believe only men can achieve it, a “master”.

Most of us aren’t masters, only a few of them come into existence every generation or two. I’m certainly not one, and to feel ok about life, there are some things I “need”, some of which get met through this forum here.

And I’m sure you are getting some of your “needs” met through this forum as well, otherwise you wouldn’t be here.

Hope that helps to understand this concept, I know I struggled with it for years.

Truth has no place to live in the mind of a woman.

[Secret Agent MGTOWParticipant 22543]

Yes, quite a lot of men are pussyholics.

Who gets them hooked? The entire gyno centric society. They elevate women, push double standards without identifying them as double standards, and get boys and young men to worship pussy as the ultimate male goal.

In a whole bunch of ways. Moms, cuck dads, peer pressure, societal “norms”, pop culture…

Break the cycle you have mass MGTOW occurring.

Women want everything, but want responsibility and accountability for nothing.

[Ever5Participant 1008]

If you grew up in a toxic environment, you’re natural tendency is towards self neglect.

It’s been said that 75% of households in the western culture are “highly” disfunctional.

Men are at a disadvantage because of societal norms. Men are trained to numb it out, not acknowledge and are usually shut down very quickly if they show any emotional neediness.

This also creates a lot of suffering in relationships. Because this lack of needs being met creates a huge void, and then that leads to being taken advantage of, used and abused.

This is also why men usually get very confused and agitated when they hear this idea of “needs”. To get access to your needs, you first have to realize and acknowledge how s~~~ty childhood really was.

I know for me, my parents were hardly around and when they were, it usually wasn’t pleasant, certainly not enjoyable. I had to acknowledge that to myself. Being in denial about it, kept that pain hidden and in the subconscious, creating emotional impulses such as denial when a woman was acting like an asshole. That’s what I was used to growing up, my mother was a very selfish asshole.

And it’s a process to get access to all this mess, I’m certainly not there yet, but I’ve come a long way.

Once you begin to acknowledge these things, and obtain them externally or internally, you then must guard them.

For example, I cut a lot of s~~~ty people from my life. I realized that if I consented to being abused, hassles, being in non reciprocal relationships, then I consented to more of the same.

Toxic family environments are very cult like. They lead you to believe that you need them, while draining you emotionally, making you feel more and more insecure and inadequate.

Confidence is a natural state when someone is getting their needs met. They feel ok, and when someone feels ok, they are more attractive and tend to get better friends and what not.

Someone who is in a toxic environment, they are often belittled and so they lack confidence and lack the tools and understanding of what a healthy relationship should operate as. Because of this, healthy people don’t want to be around them, and toxic people gravitate towards them.

It’s a long process, and it does take work and going through pain and suffering to make the corrections.

Once that is accomplished. Once you understand, ok this is what it feels like to feel “ok” about myself, you then will naturally guard it with your life.

It’s like the boiling frog analogy. If you grow up in a s~~~ty environment, you don’t know anything different, it’s “normal” and thus becomes a giant trap.

I know for me, estrangement/cuttingpeople out of my life, was a requirement to growing up and becoming more healthy.

Truth has no place to live in the mind of a woman.

[CarnageParticipant 22113]

Get rid of emotions, problem solved, like a crab, leg is a problem? Cut it off.

To those following me, be careful, I just farted. Men those beans are killers.

[CarnageParticipant 22113]

I cut off everything I don’t need, off, off, friends? F~~~ it.
Family? F~~~ it.
Food, water and shelter.
All else is not necessary.

“Humans need contact and interaction “

No bitch you need contact and interaction, leave me the f~~~ alone.

To those following me, be careful, I just farted. Men those beans are killers.

[Ever5Participant 1008]

Why are they pussyholics though???

At this point in my life, jacking off is often more fulfilling that hooking up with a woman.

It’s not the pussy but what the pussy represents, emotionally.

And yeah, society is a huge piece to this puzzle. Men are brainwashed to neglect themselves, self sacrifice etc. this is certainly a problem.

But why the pussy? I know for me, it wasn’t the pussy, it was the desire to look significant/important. Whether that was in the minds of other men, or in the mind of a woman. The pussy was the gatekeeper of that, only to find, like the wizard of oz, it was only an illusion.

If you can discover your emotional independence, I believe that would be the ultimate in MGTOW.

However to discover that, you first have to discover this idea of “needs”, acknowledge them “consciously”, until then, they are in the subconscious, as voids hidden by layers of pain that must be explored. Only then can the subconscious become conscious. And once conscious, one someone is aware of them, then they can discover how to fill them internally eternally, or use the external environment to fill them temporarily but consistently.

But you’ve got to become consciously aware of this stuff. That is very difficult for most men in today’s culture.

Truth has no place to live in the mind of a woman.

[Ever5Participant 1008]

And carnage, the idea that you don’t “need” friends.

I’ve gone through this myself and it was necessary. I had to learn how to be ok with myself alone and basically gave up on people.

However, life can be more positive, more enjoyable, more worthwhile with interactions from people, if this crap is handled.

When it’s not handled, healthy people don’t like to be around unhealthy people. The narcicist/codependent model for example. Toxic people tend to find themselves, both sides of the polarity. User/used, abuser/abused.

But it doesn’t have to be that way. You can have more positive interactions with humans. But to do that, you have to drop the negativity that exist within the subconscious, making it conscious. And the negativity I’m talking about is hidden behind layers of denial and ignorance, lack of understanding, lack of wisdom.

When this mess is straightened out, interactions with people become enjoyable. Until then, if stuck in a toxic frame, the only people that stick around are vampiric and hostile.

Truth has no place to live in the mind of a woman.

[Ever5Participant 1008]

And it’s difficult to walk away from s~~~ty people if all this crap is running in the background.

The void creates the bondage. Realizing that this came from parents/caregivers is extremely difficult. And that bondage then leads to all sorts of relationship problems.

I could go on and on about this.

At the end of the day, as I said in my original post, you’ve got to figure out how to have emotional independence, outside of a relationship.

Now more than ever.

Back in the day, you could get away with it, at least some of the time, cause the woman, “subconsciously” felt she needed a man. Not the case anymore, you cannot get away with.

Every man has to find emotional independence outside of a relationship. If they don’t, there is no chance in hell that they’ll be able to have a more positive than negative life experience.

It will be hell on earth for them.

Truth has no place to live in the mind of a woman.

[Ever5Participant 1008]

And relationship, I’m talking all human interactions that are more than just strangers that never talk to each other.

I’m not even talking about marriage or long term, I don’t think there’s anyway that can be positive.

But just simple friendships, or interactions where two or more people come together and interact on a more than superficial level

Truth has no place to live in the mind of a woman.

[Anonymous 18]

You are trying to superimpose relatively new (~300 years) phenomenon on ~200,000+ years of evolutionary genetic modelling.

You are trying to sell male need for women as authentic and genetic mandate. It is not. Same society that sets the woman free at the labor of men also conditions men to be disposable.

If not, why hasn’t there been MGTOW as big of a phenomenon instead of feminism?

Women don’t need us you say – so let us go on our merry ways – why the shaming? Build infrastructures for men and encourage them to be single, provide incentives for us to remain single. Why give a woman dozen birth control methods and only have 1 for men?

She doesn’t need to obey a man. But she needs him to clean the sewers for her occasional tampon flushing down the drain.

Women can’t discard men in their personal lives and not have the effects ripple through societal structures that men built.

Woman may adapt like chameleons do. They had the governmental assistance in addition to male authentic desire to provide for her. That was a win win.

But men do not adapt. We create change. She can adapt to that. But wait, red pill women? Come again?

When the crickets chirp at 40, an empty womb and an empty house is all she has left.

[Ever5Participant 1008]

Yeah I’m not shaming men, at least that’s not my intention.

And yeah, on the macro, women do need men, in actuallity. That’s 100% the case.

However in the micro, 1 to 1 relationship, women do not “need” men. And would I put “need” in quotes, I’m referring to emotionally, in the idea of covering up insecurity/void.

In my experience, the majority of my heartache/headache with women resulted in me believing I was “needed” and not walking away, or trying to be “needed”, when I wasn’t. Wasted energy, wasted time. No good deed goes unpunished.

With what you are referring to, men did it to themselves to feel “needed”. They provided all these tools, including government programs, to feel important/needed/significant. The stakes got higher and higher, they like made their utility extinct, at least in the micro.

So there lies the problem, men made their utility extinct in the 1-1 relationship with women. In the micro, the relationship between a man and a woman, men are no longer “needed”, because men created such a secure environment. Women’s security/safety is now provided by men in the macro, government programs, their job with its benefits, etc.

The problem is, men never focused on themselves and their “need” to feel important. That was the only reason they built this crap for women, to feel important.

But men didn’t resolve their own problems of being needed/important and still looked for it in women, where it no longer exist.

I’m not saying that that this can be fixed. It can’t. Just like how women’s “need” for safety/security has been outsourced, outside of the relationship.

Men now have to figure out a way to outsource their “need” for importance/significance… or simply acknowledge it consciously and give it up, which I think is what I have accomplished or will accomplish. Because I have no intention of working for someone else, and I don’t see anyway that it can be met. Simply becoming consciously aware of what is it that I “thought/believed” I “needed” from women, seems to have been enough to just let it go.

Once you realize it’s impossible, it’s easy to let it go. Just like the superman comment above. It’s impossible to be needed in a relationship, 1-1, with a woman. The “need” to be needed is on existent.

And yeah, we need to create another f~~~ing word for “needs”, because this s~~~ is so confusing to try an articulate with a word that has has a completely different meaning but the same spelling.

Need vs “need”. It’s f~~~ing aggravating.

Truth has no place to live in the mind of a woman.

[Ever5Participant 1008]

The true problem is the reciprocity, the exchange of value.

Women could exchange the value of seeing their man as important/needed in exchange for the man offering the value of security/safety.

And we are talking about emotions here. The man could never offer true security, just like the woman couldn’t make him important. But she could create the “feeling” of importance.

But all this stuff takes energy, emotional energy.

When a man wants to feel needed by a woman, well for a woman to do that, she’s going to have to create it. But there is nothing to reciprocate, because the man isn’t creating the “feeling” of security. She’s got government/job/etc. that supplies that so she’s never felt the “feeling” of absence of security.

This whole thing is about feelings. And yeah, men have this too but most can’t feel it consciously because it’s been numbed out, denied, etc.

But there’s no mutual exchange going on. Now once you give this up, or get it outside, well the woman no longer has the power/value/she doesn’t have the upper hand emotionally with emotional currency.

A woman isn’t looking for the feeling of security from a man.

Once men give up the need to feel important… well. Ow the playing field is much closer to equal in the micro moment to moment 1-1 interaction with a woman.

I’m not talking about marriage or commitment. I’m talking about in the moment, the interaction itself, no future plans, no commitment.

Man will then not go out of his way to “feel” important, and thus not be disappointed, used up, taken advantage of.

No idea if anyone can comprehend what I’m trying to say.

Basically when ou stop “needing”, wanting to feel, important in the eyes of a woman, you are a huge step closer if not already there, in taking your power back. At least in the moment to moment interactions.

At the end of the day, what sucks for a man… “I wasn’t important”, “I wasn’t good enough”, “she didn’t need me”. Give up the illusion or get it outside of women, and then the woman doesn’t have an advantage over the man.

Bringing it one step close to an equal playing field, if not completely equal in the moment to moment interactions. Outside of marriage, welfare and all that s~~~.

Truth has no place to live in the mind of a woman.

[Ever5Participant 1008]

Why does a man commit to a woman, ever? She’s a weight and a burden, always has been.

But the man wanted to feel “needed”. So he stuck around, he stuck around in hopes of feeling important/significant in the eyes of this woman, this weight and burden.

Once that need is relinquished, man can no longer be manipulated by the guilt of responsibility, of being needed or of the desire of being needed.

At least in my life, that’s the only thing that kept me trapped.

Realizing that women do not need me, that’s freedom in a 1-1 interaction with women. No longer do I have to go out of my way, because I know they don’t need me and will not see me as important/significant, ever.

From there, there’s no whatever, no bulls~~~. Without that illusion, a man is not going to go out of his way for a woman, and that’s the root of the problem in a 1-1 relationship.

The man investing more energy into the relationship than the woman gives back.

I don’t think I can explain it any better than that. If you don’t comprehend what I’m saying, and you want to know, read it all once again, I’m confident it’ll make sense.

Truth has no place to live in the mind of a woman.

[ghostParticipant]

I am over 30 and don’t give a f~~~ about women. They are nothing but base level creatures who are better off with effeminate, pussy begging, low IQ, low testosterone, blue pill, white knighting, mangina simps.

[AwakenedParticipant 35203]

Reply To: Accept Reality and Adapt

Accept the TRUTH and Adapt

In a World of Justin Beibers Be a Johnny Cash

[BubParticipant 1410]

Ever5, thanks for the post. I agree with you.

Just rolling down the road

[Author]

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