Writing a CV from the s~~~ test perspective.

Topic by GrotesqueRogue

GrotesqueRogue

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This topic contains 10 replies, has 7 voices, and was last updated by  Anonymous 4 years ago.

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  • #168596
    +2
    GrotesqueRogue
    GrotesqueRogue
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    116

    I look at all job interviews as a collection of s~~~ tests to determine if you are worth hiring. That’s why I most of the time I try to be wordy and witty when it comes to answering such questions as “name your biggest weaknesses” and etc.

    The thing is that even with such perspective on job interviews, I seem to struggle to come up with something wordy and elaborate when it comes to writing down why I am a suitable candidate for being even allowed to pass a face-to-face interview.

    At the moment my portfolio doesn’t allow me to impress the recruiters right away and I do realize that there are candidates who might be much stronger than me thanks to their experience in their respective area.

    Something along the lines of “Sure, I understand that there might be more suitable candidates than me with a more solid portfolio, but it’s up to you to decide if I am worthy of being hired” seems like a lame line, because I kinda admit that from a technical perspective I am weaker than other candidates.

    Any ideas?

    #168602
    +1
    RoyDal
    RoyDal
    Participant

    I used to be a hiring manager at a STEM corporation. The resumes I did not like were the wordy clever ones. The ones I liked were one page and exactly to the point.

    There was a book on how to write resumes in the library of a town I used to live in. It also advocated one page and exactly to the point.

    What a feminazi HR manager might like in terms of your writing stile, I cannot say. I can say we were pressured to select women over men (even if the man had higher scores on our evaluations). In addition we were pressured to select persons from a “minority” background over Caucasians (again regardless of eval score). I do not imagine things have improved since then.

    I did my best to ignore those non-orders, and never got any grief for doing so. I always tried to hire the best qualified no matter what. I hope the hiring managers who see your resume do the same.

    Society asks MGTOWs: Why are you not making more tax-slaves?

    #168604
    Kizell
    kizell
    Participant
    368

    I hire people at my job. I can tell you that 90% of my hiring decision comes down to how they present themselves. … I know it in the first 30 seconds.

    1. Confidence
    2. Personality
    3. Appearance

    If you don’t succeed here (such as a good firm handshake and walking like your dick is the biggest in the room), the questions mean nothing.

    #168605
    Kizell
    kizell
    Participant
    368

    Also never make your CV long. I will only skim over the important s~~~ anyway in about 15 seconds.

    #168607
    Pabsawake
    pabsawake
    Participant
    1761

    If they ask you a question like what do you consider to be your biggest weakness?

    response: Having to answer loaded and ridiculous questions.

    but seriously just wear a conservative suit and trust yourself, short to the point answers and only elaborate on what you are certain about. Don’t worry so much about your lack of experience a lot of employers prefer to hire candidates they think they can mold their own way. And be honest.

    Good Luck!

    "You can either love women or understand them, you can't do both". Truth over everything

    #168611
    GrotesqueRogue
    GrotesqueRogue
    Participant
    116

    I am trying to keep my CV really short – a couple of sentences at best so that it would take 10-15 seconds to read it. But most of the time I always have doubts if what I wrote is sufficient enough.

    On the contrary, I am not that concerned about my resume – it looks quite solid with links and other needed stuff.

    #168612
    Quietlyquietly
    Quietlyquietly
    Participant
    728

    I’ve tried a few things in my time, and one that “nearly” got me a job, was the accompanying letter, which I wrote something like this:

    “Dear Ms. x, I imagine by now you are thoroughly bored of trawling through the hundreds of CVs from Highly Motivated Autonomous Team Players, so I would suggest you award me the position immediately to cut your workload, and you can go home early. Ultimately, we both know that the most important quality is whether or not I fit in with the existing team, and how good my coffee making skills are, so how does a Thursday appointment sound to you? I can make 11.30am.”

    She rang me to say that she laughed her knickers off, and would have given me the job had it not been filled already.

    #168614
    GrotesqueRogue
    GrotesqueRogue
    Participant
    116

    I guess I f~~~ed up a little bit with phrasing when writing the post – by “wordy” I meant the ability to use your wit and confidence to come up with preferably short answers that would indicate, as Kizell mentioned, that I have the biggest dick in the room.

    #168616
    +1
    GrotesqueRogue
    GrotesqueRogue
    Participant
    116

    Quietlyquietly, that is almost what I write in the CV, smth like “You have gone through so many people’s CVs, that it almost impossible to figure out who is worth hiring. As for me, I can say that I am awesome”. It did get me a couple of interviews.

    #168775

    It’s not what you know, but who you know. I found that out the hard way. You can lose out on a job because they decided to hire somebody’s cousin even though they are less qualified than you.

    Feminism is a movement where opinions are presented as facts and emotions are presented as evidence.

    #168793

    Anonymous
    1

    I am also in the job market and I avoid jobs that ask for a cover letter most of the time. Sometime I apply and not send a cv. I have gotten a few interviews without it. It matters to some and other don’t give a s~~~. I just do whatever sometime. The biggest issues I have is a “thank you” letter. It is such BS. I am now going to try and avoid that completely, The last job interview I went to, I was told that the HR lady will give me a call, but when I do a follow up she said “no”. How often do you guys get “we will call you” and not get a call back? I did some research and some people said that they do that to be “nice”? WTF

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