Why I've Got Three Women in my Life

[StargazerParticipant 12505]

I used to have a friend… a typical “alpha” guy… good looking, successful, gym bro, military background, southern “gentleman” manners combined with a bit of a bad boy attitude… the kind of guy that girls get tingly over. Then suddenly he’s got a live-in girlfriend. She arrived from out of town like a bolt of lightning from Mt. Olympus… and within a matter of weeks she had him completely whipped.

Sure, she was a good looking woman with a hot body and a charming southern accent… and she seemed to be a “one of the guys” kind of girl (you know that type) which I suppose is how she got into his life so quickly. Anyway, the three of us were talking at a barbecue party at one point and I asked him a bit sarcastically how the married life was treating him. He shot back with something like “Well at least I’m getting some.” and I replied with mock conciliation “That’s cool. I’m dating three women and haven’t yet found one who can do it for me completely. ”

Over the course of the next few weeks, he threw that three women thing back in my face in front of several groups of our friends (and unattached women that I might have been interested in) as an attempt to shame and c~~~ block me… an effort for which I eventually cut him out of my life.

If he’d taken a moment to ask me man to man why I needed three women to keep me happy, I’d have told him the following. In the continuing absence of a single individual who can meet all of my needs, there are three categories of women I will engage with:

Level 1: The Boat. This is the reasonably attractive and reasonably interesting woman who I know without a doubt is available to see me on a regular basis when I want and will do what I want, pick up her fair share of the tab, share sex with me then go home. Her work, her family, her problems… while I might hear about them from time to time, are her own and only serve as entertainment (or useful reminders) to me. I’m not in love with this woman and never will be and she knows it. The relationship works because I can always fall back to it and it’s the foundation on which the next two levels are built.

Level 2: The Bait Fish. This is any one of a number of women who I may be interested in at any given time. She is attractive and desirable and is good for a fun time when I can arrange to see her. There’s an intimate connection but it’s less frequent and somewhat uncertain… she’s someone I would be willing to make a bit of effort for and who I think reflects my taste and standards in a woman but she can tell I’m not desperate and won’t take any bulls~~~ from her because I’ve always got my fallback position.

Level 3: The Blue Marlin. This is the rare woman who comes along and really flips my switch in the looks or personality department… the real hot number that a younger me would have idealized as being “out of my league” or “too good to eat”. She’s the kind of woman I would want to have on my arm at a black tie event or take with me on a trip overseas… the kind of woman who makes me want to do stupid things like shop for rings and give her a title… which is precisely why I must have the first two women around to keep me grounded.

Like many of you, I want the excitement and rush of netting the occasional trophy fish… even in the cases where she gets away, she’s still a great story to tell and a large part of why I bought the gear and go to the lake to begin with. But I’m wise enough to understand that there’s a lot more to fishing than gearing up to wait around and hope for the big catch. I’m going to spend a lot of time on the lake with my line in the water and the only way I’m going to enjoy that is to know that my dinner doesn’t have to depend on that big catch if I can snag a few smaller ones along the way or, if it comes down to it, just enjoy sitting in the boat while drinking a beer and watching the fish jump.

[JediTimParticipant 50]

3-5-7 rule.

3 is game

5 is hood

7 is insanity

Looks like you’re pulling it right.

[TheNinjaUWannaH8Participant 386]

3-5-7!  Ha Ha Ha!

Smith & Wesson has nothing on you, Jedi! 🙂

[StargazerParticipant 12505]

3 is game

I’m not familiar with that one… do you have a link to some more detail?

As it turns out, writing it all out made me think it through and, as a result, I’ve let two of these women go… the casual fling woman because of her kids and her economic situation, and the long shot because I think she’s holding me at second base to string me along for the validation while she chases after someone else.

Still comfortable with the general concept, though I’m curious to know how other MGTOW are feeling about women… worth dating casually on your own terms or poison to be avoided at all costs?

 

[TheNinjaUWannaH8Participant 386]

Hey Doc…It’s a reference to one of my Old Post.

2014/10/27 at 1:47 pm in reply to: 10 RULES OF MGTOW. WHAT’S YOUR 10 RULES?

[AFTParticipant 2724]

I wish I could avoid women, at all costs, but my biological urges are too strong.  It is a battle between base needs and common sense.  That is why I’m here reading all the comments, advice, and figuring out the best way forward, for me.  After my divorce, I was messed up and feeling sorry for myself for a while, and looking around at all the BBW ( Big Beastly Women) with attitude around, ( I live in Australia, but same is true all over “western culture”) I got depressed in the hopelessness of it all.

Then I went to visit family in Eastern Europe, what an eye opener, (that is a topic for another thread), I came back reinvigorated, ready to take on the world, well I started dating multiple women, mainly from the internet sites.  Felt good walking around with a lighter load but eventually saw them for what they are and it sort of disgusted me.  I thought they were needy and clingy, until reading through MRM and I can clearly see their manipulation, solipsistic self interest with guile.  The more I talked to clients, friends and acquaintances the more obvious it all was, like looking through reality glasses for the first time.

I have been concentrating on career development, while figuring out my best move.  I know that there is nothing in it for me in any LTR, so as soon as I’ve completed my exams, and after returning from another Eastern Europe adventure, I’ll head back into the market place, but strictly casually with my agenda first and foremost.

That’s the other thing, they have their agenda, I understand that, but what’s in it for me?  They wouldn’t settle down with someone they feel beneath their status (however overestimated it may be) and they don’t concede that they are well past their expiration dates, sometimes I feel like saying, you are 35 what do you have to offer me?  A couple of years before you dry up, then potentially 18 years of child support as you blame me for all your past choices.  No thanks so back to your comment, I will be dating women “ONLY ON MY TERMS”.  Forget the Disney Fantasy, lets make this Red Pill work for me.

When the war cemeteries are half full of the corpses of dead conscripted women, only then will women have earned the right to speak of equality. Sidecar “A man is a success if he gets up in the morning and goes to bed at night and in between does what he wants to do.” - Bob Dylan

[StargazerParticipant 12505]

I will be dating women “ONLY ON MY TERMS”. Forget the Disney Fantasy, lets make this Red Pill work for me.

I like it. I get the sense that a significant number of MGTOW are done with women… either too burned by bad experiences, too distracted by their enticements or, let’s be honest, incapable of catching one that works for them. The good thing is that, aside from the No Marriage Contract rule which I totally support, MGTOW philosophy seems to be a lot less dogmatic than outsiders might expect and accepting of men whose “own way” includes the occasional interaction with women. Plus the aftermath stories are great fun to read!

In any case, I may be more “no women” than I had original thought… I had to nuke the middle hamster today as well. Too much bitching about the consequences of her stupid, self destructive choices and not enough spending fun time together with me. Bye bye, baby!

[AFTParticipant 2724]

I wouldn’t say I am done with women.  I am done with the fantasy, and being blindly lead by my dick.  It is not so much that we are incapable of catching a “good” one, that works for us, more the case that “EVERY” one I’ve caught and heard of so far has been a bad LT proposition, lets not argue about “WHY” this is the case, just accept the reality we live in and navigate through it accordingly.

Another topic could be, that as more men start to red pill, society will be forced into recognizing the issues, and short comings of a Feminized society.  Blue pillers, through no fault are enabling the feminization, women are so far gone, and deluded that it will be a long process.  That is just conjecture and a hypothesis, we still need to maximize our imperatives in a rather short life time faced with the landscape that is Feminized Society.

I would get married, but only because I still want kids, but my common sense says that in order to mitigate the risk, she needs to have at least as much wealth as me at the outset, I am not entering a one way contract, because that is all that Marriage really is.  A Contract, a really s~~~ty one way contract full of risks with very little reward. Goes back to “What’s in it for me?”

Getting Married  in itself is not the danger, it is the potential consequences of divorce, and the landscape where feminized society has “Empowered” women to seek their “Happiness” at all costs, which end up being born by men, specifically men that didn’t protect themselves, because they were living in denial, not seeing reality as it is.

That is what I mean by making the red pill work for me.  Now I see the reality laid out for me as bare, naked truth, I have no excuse to make blue pill, white knight, mangina mistakes, I owe it to myself to mitigate the risks, as I maximize whats in it for me.

 

When the war cemeteries are half full of the corpses of dead conscripted women, only then will women have earned the right to speak of equality. Sidecar “A man is a success if he gets up in the morning and goes to bed at night and in between does what he wants to do.” - Bob Dylan

[StargazerParticipant 12505]

It is not so much that we are incapable of catching a “good” one, that works for us, more the case that “EVERY” one I’ve caught and heard of so far has been a bad LT proposition, lets not argue about “WHY” this is the case, just accept the reality we live in and navigate through it accordingly.

I understand what you mean. I didn’t mean to imply that it was a failure of men to attract good women, though I can see how it reads that way looking back on it. I have to say I agree that I’ve never yet been with a woman who I imagined to be a good long term prospect… which begs the question is it really the consequences of divorce that are the whole of the problem or is marriage and the forming of long term partnerships with women in general also problematic?

I mean, let’s say divorce law as it stands now were to be overturned and you could write your own, legally binding contract of partnership when requesting special legal status from the state that specified everything exactly the way you wanted it to be (something I thought gays should have done… create a new form of marriage so much better than the current form that straight people would want to get themselves ‘gay married’ to each other). Would any of us even then want to get married?

If I could legally bind a woman to agree to stay skinny, make me sandwiches and blow me three times a week in exchange for living in my house, eating my groceries and driving my car and stipulate that if she were in breach she would walk out the door with nothing more than she walked in with, would I even then want that woman in my house, pushing to redecorate and trying to convince me to get a dog?

Yes, modern divorce law is a jack but it only exists because it reflects the values that women bring to the table when it comes to relationships. Even if the law were made fair, would women necessarily be any different? To say that marriage would be okay if divorce law were not so risky is to presume that the women (and their proxy defendors) who drive the implementation of divorce laws would, for some reason, think and behave differently in the absence of those laws.

I say they would not. The sad truth is that the laws will not change until women (and blue pill men’s attitude toward women) change and women will not change until they absolutely must for their own survival. And even then, would that really be change? Consider the recent “women against feminism” movement. Are any MGTOW actually buying that? Then why are we even still talking about marriage like it’s anything other then a woman with a bridle in a man’s mouth?

[AFTParticipant 2724]

I do understand your argument is correct, that basically women are the same self serving emotional parasites regardless of the divorce or any other laws.  That is arguably correct and I haven’t found any to disprove this yet.  However it is a matter of power and control.  The fact we need a woman if we want children and moreover it is in the children’s best interest to have both parents, and there is a benefit of having a supportive family life for all the members, that’s the “need”that gives them power.  Now mix into that their ability to use the law to basically blackmail their man, and that’s their control.  How can I have a reciprocally beneficial relationship, with someone that can pull the plug and keep all the benefits whilst maintaining none of the responsibilities?  How long will it take you to end your relationships, once you can take do that, and start the process over again, with no second thoughts, no shame, no guilt no blame.

Divorce laws are part of the problem, they enable control, a whole host of other issues are most certainly present, but its the risk of inequitable separation of benefits and responsibilities that keeps me from even attempting a marriage.  Moreover that same inequity that makes it so tempting for women to take advantage of.

How many women would so casually pull the plug, if they got nothing, I mean if you walk away from a partnership, you walk away with nothing, you start over and build.  My argument is that the laws are an inducement to them to seek a better life being “independent” whilst they’re exercising their rights to screw you over.

Interesting topic, what are the most important factors, including laws that have lead to men’s inequity?

When the war cemeteries are half full of the corpses of dead conscripted women, only then will women have earned the right to speak of equality. Sidecar “A man is a success if he gets up in the morning and goes to bed at night and in between does what he wants to do.” - Bob Dylan

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