On an early Friday morning while driving home from a breakfast meet with friends, I notice this little Toyota wagon encroaching on an intersection and realize ‘that car is not stopping’. I start slowing down and sure enough, this woman runs the stop sign, pulls out in front of me and immediately slams on her brakes. So I give her the obligatory horn blast, she gets herself into motion and drives up to the next light. When the light turns green she takes off until she gets to the other side of the intersection and slams on the brakes again. Okay here, I’ve got one of these: out get some insurance money drivers in front of me. I hang back because I only have liability on my truck. An accident for me is a direct out of pocket expense from my end of the deal.
We go about a six blocks and she makes a right turn which so happens to be the same thing I had planned. Now I am behind her and there is one car between us. Well, about fifteen blocks latter I get pulled over by an Officer that tells me he has gotten a complaint that I am chasing some women around honking my horn, yelling at her and basically threatening her life. Of course my side of this: “Well yes, I did encounter a Whiplash Wanda out on the streets trying to cause accidents and collect insurance money.” The Officer takes my id goes back to his car and while I am sitting there, good ol’ Whiplash Wonda drives by, looks at me, and starts laughing her ass off.
After checking up on me and learning that I have no criminal record, no traffic tickets, no arrest warrants, no restraining orders or anything else that might indicate I would suddenly go off the rails, decides he going to let me go. Lucky for me I was on a road that was on a direct approach to my home. But then he reconsiders and decides to give the white knight routine one more try. He points about fifty feet in front of the truck asks ‘How come you did not stop there when I pulled you over?’ “What? I don’t know, this spot seemed safe enough to me.” He won’t let this go, he starts going on and on that I should have stopped there, next time stop there, and why didn’t I stop there…
Now, while I am listening to this Officer harangue me about where I should have stopped, I am looking out of my window and every couple of minutes ol’ Whiplash Wanda goes driving by laughing her ass off. I take it all in stride and keep answering; “Yep, your right, I should a stopped there instead.” Eventually the Officer loses interest and I am allowed to go on my way.
Moral of the Story? Be careful out there men! There is this predatory woman that looks like Jabba the Hutt aiming to collect some insurance money off you. And if you honk at her be prepared, because she will arrange for the police to hunt you down and see if she can’t get you gunned downed, on a city street, on an early Friday morning in the cool clear light of day. Just to entertain her!
more throttle ..... less brakes.....
