TIP FOR THE CHILDLESS FATHER

[AlacParticipant 18]

If you are a “childless father,” as mentioned in the title of this note, or if you believe you will soon become one, I am writing this to you.

It’s no secret that there are many deadbeat dads out there. However, amongst those of us who have been dragged through a family court system, it is also common knowledge that many of the men who are hurled indiscriminately into the deadbeat dad category, do not fit the profile. Many of us, through the lies of an ex and the assistance of a judge, have the image of the unloving and selfish father thrust upon us, despite whatever the truth may be. Sadly, the truths of our situations are often covered up by courts, as there are rarely any court documents which contain these truths.

Whether through the deception of an ex having been coupled with the assault of a family court, or by any other means, such as large distances between parents’ homes, most of us fathers don’t stand a chance to be any significant part of our own children’s lives. We can pay child support, but in many cases, the mother teaches the child that she receives no payment from the father, and raises the child to believe the father does not love him/her.

As an example of this, I have a friend whom I’ve know for nearly twenty years. She was raised to believe that her father abandoned her and had no interest in her, and so on and so forth. Eventually, she did learn that this was a lie. Her mother did also admit to essentially destroying this “missing father,” and that she had been telling her daughter lies all her life. When she sought out her father in her attempt to form a relationship with him, she discovered that he had passed away long before.
I mention this story not just to give an example of how horrendous many women can become when given the opportunity, but because this particular friend of mine has told me more than once that an idea I had regarding my own daughter was a very good one. Because my daughter is going through some similar things as my friend has, I took her confirmation seriously.

Before I post my idea, let me first tell you that this isn’t some life changing tip. It’s really very simple, and many of you reading this may already have done the same thing, but for those of you who are at your wit’s end, and haven’t considered this yet, here’s a small, yet effective, thing you can do.

Email. Make an email address for your kid. An email address specifically for when your child is older. There’s no point in rushing to get this to your kid, because sometimes, custody situations change. This is for your son or daughter, should you not be able to keep up contact with them, until they reach, or nearly reach, adulthood. Getting the address and password to them years from now may be difficult, depending on each situation, but difficult means in no way, impossible.
If you have pictures of your child, especially ones of your child and you, send them ALL to the email. Write letters often. They don’t always have to be anything significant. Remember that the point is to combat the amount of lies your child will almost certainly be fed from his/her mother. If you try calling and “can’t get through,” write a letter that same day. This way, should your son or daughter grow up believing you missed a birthday or something, they will eventually have a message with a date attached to it, showing that indeed you did not forget.

Depending on just how bad things are or get, regarding your ex, you may even want or need to include photos of court papers. For example, I know for a fact that my ex has told my daughter I’ve left her twice. I have court documents and other records that show I was actually chasing her all over the country and that I provided evidence against many of her mother’s claims. Should she grow up without me as her mother wishes and believes her lies, she will now have the evidence against those falsehoods.

Anything and everything you can think of to include will help. As told to me by my friend, something like this would have meant the world to her in her late teens, since her father was left to the point where he couldn’t be a part of her life. It may not sound like much, and indeed it is very simple, but remember just what it is.
This is a way to eventually prove to your child that they NEVER had a father who abandoned them, stopped loving them, or stopped thinking about them. How old they are when you get the email address and all that in contains is up to you and depends heavily on your situation. That being said, odds are, the damage will be done. But that isn’t something we can control or even prevent, sadly. What we CAN do, however, is leave a series of dated records made available to them so that at some point, they will realize that we are not bad fathers, or deadbeat dads, but that we are in fact good fathers who were victimized by a corrupt court system and a sociopathic woman, which in turn victimized that very child whom is receiving these records.

This will not fix all the damage that may/will have been done to your child. But I believe whole-heartedly that it will certainly help both your child and yourself.

I also want to mention that it’s important to not allow your messages to turn into rants about your ex. It can be tricky, given the fact that even a blatant stating of the events can sound like attacks against her, because of what she’s actually done. Be sure that the emails are mainly about you and your kid. He/she doesn’t need to grow up and read a bunch of complaining about their mother, no matter how much truth the complaints may be grounded in. Keep your calm, maintain that logical attitude. It’s all about integrity. If we start going on about what rotten people their mothers are, we sound just like their mothers. True, we wouldn’t be lying, but let’s not give in to emotional outbursts. I’ll say it again; it’s all about integrity.

Well, that’s all for now. I hope some of you can find use from this little idea. It has certainly helped me maintain my sanity from time to time, and I hope it does the same for someone else.

My philosophy on women: You can talk to, argue with, or even attempt to reason with a brick wall. But at the end of the day, it's just gonna go ahead and keep on being a brick wall. So you can either continue wasting your energy, talking to something that ain't even listening to you, or you can save your breath, stop wasting your damn time, and just bounce the occasional ball off it.

[Anonymous 1]

This message might not be for because I don’t plan to have kids. but this idea is awesome for those that do. Very simple and it will be a great tool for men. Great tip!

[sidecarParticipant 35837]

Alac wrote:

It’s no secret that there are many deadbeat dads out there.

I take exception to that vile, dishonest term.

Men are required to pay for children, including children that aren’t even their offspring, with no say in the matter, while women are empowered to abandon any and all parental responsibilities, giving up children for adoption, terminating pregnancies, or even just dumping them in “child sanctuaries” and walking away, with no cost to the women whatsoever.

So long as that gross inequity persists there can be no such thing as a “deadbeat dad”, just men unable or unwilling to pay a charge unjustly imposed upon them.

[uchibenkeiParticipant 7965]

women who get abortions are deadbeat moms.

I bathe in the tears of single moms.

[AlacParticipant 18]

@sidecar
Maybe you just haven’t known a deadbeat dad. I myself have known more than a few who, upon discovering they will soon be a father, quit their job and move. There are a lot of cases of men who react like this out there. I wasn’t referring to the men who can’t or won’t pay, but to the men who refuse to even attempt to be a father to their own children. That’s a deadbeat dad. Maybe I just have a different definition for that term than what you were thinking.

My philosophy on women: You can talk to, argue with, or even attempt to reason with a brick wall. But at the end of the day, it's just gonna go ahead and keep on being a brick wall. So you can either continue wasting your energy, talking to something that ain't even listening to you, or you can save your breath, stop wasting your damn time, and just bounce the occasional ball off it.

[sidecarParticipant 35837]

Alac wrote:

Maybe you just haven’t known a deadbeat dad.

Of course I don’t know any. I don’t know any unicorns or forest fairies or bigfoots or loch ness monsters either.

Because there is no such thing.

The term “deadbeat dad” is a vile, vicious, pernicious LIE created by greedy selfish women to shame men into paying for the unilateral choices of greedy selfish women.

End of story.

If men had an equal “right to choose” as women, if men had an equal right to abandon as women do, if men had an equal right to custody as women do, then you might have some point or some position. But men don’t and you don’t.

Men can’t be dads, deadbeat or otherwise, because men can’t have children. They are the mother’s children. They are the state’s children. They are never the father’s.

All the “father” ever gets is the bill.

So just where the f~~~ do you get off thinking you can use such s~~~sucking gynocentric feminist lying bulls~~~ terminology here, of all places? Men have all the responsibilities and none of the rights and no choice in the matter, and for that you DARE to call any man a “deadbeat”?

Take that s~~~ over to HeForShe, because it ain’t f~~~ing happening here.

[AlacParticipant 18]

You obviously have no clue what you are talking about, and speak out of emotion alone. Men can absolutely be dads. I made it perfectly clear that I was talking about the type of guy who willingly chooses to have nothing to do with his own children. You have either not read the entirety of my note, or are too immature to look past a term you don’t like, and end up reacting out of pure emotion alone. I’m not even going to explain any further, because what you try to imply about me and what I said is so wildly inaccurate, and is nothing more than an emotion fuelled rant.

My philosophy on women: You can talk to, argue with, or even attempt to reason with a brick wall. But at the end of the day, it's just gonna go ahead and keep on being a brick wall. So you can either continue wasting your energy, talking to something that ain't even listening to you, or you can save your breath, stop wasting your damn time, and just bounce the occasional ball off it.

[Anonymous 25]

Another option or doing both together is to save the money from never getting married, put it in a bank account for your child. When the child turns 18, get a lawyer to write to the child and say they have a large lump sum of money and are invited to visit the lawyers office to discuss.

If your child wants to find out the truth of what really happens and for you to be re-involved in their life, they can have the money to spend on education or a house.

Watch the bitch ex squeal then. There will be an epidemic of motherless children when they turn 18, with those tactics.

At 18 the child is old enough to choose for themselves who the better parent is…

[sidecarParticipant 35837]

Alac wrote:

Men can absolutely be dads.

Only on the sufferance of the mother and at the pleasure of the state.

Which mean no. They can’t be dads. Not really. At best men only get to “play daddy” while still paying all the bills. They are a bank account and nothing more. As soon as mommy or big nanny state government disagrees with the “dad” or thinks they can get a better deal somewhere else, he’s out of the picture with no recourse.

And you have the gall to call him a deadbeat? F~~~ you.

[mozi-tzuParticipant 0]

Alac wrote:

If you are a “childless father,” as mentioned in the title of this note, or if you believe you will soon become one, I am writing this to you.

Well, that’s all for now. I hope some of you can find use from this little idea. It has certainly helped me maintain my sanity from time to time, and I hope it does the same for someone else.

This is not a good idea. To someone who is still brainwashed in the typical gynocentric upbringing most of us suffered through it can seem like a good idea.

Instead of a man being free he is a perpetual victim of the state/mother/child. He is feeling shame and guilt over being perceived as a “dead-beat-dad” The State knows exactly what it is doing. The mothers/women …most of them have no clue they are just doing whatever is necessary to get that money… and the child would not know any better. They will be thought mostly by the state in the school system to maintain the status quo. The only advice I would give “if asked” on how to deal with this situation is to leave a space for the child when they come of age and come looking for you. Give the child a bit of time to come to grips with the “real-reality” of how the world really works and not the illusion their existence has been so far. If they shape up Things can work out if not ……. This is mainly for a male child for females or gay males who identify as female I would not even bother as the nanny State and/or some stupid man/male will keep the gravy train running to their benefit indefinitely. Feeling guilty about children is simply a weakness which will be and is exploited for maximum effect by the State, women and society in general this is stupid and you thinking this is a great idea simply shows you are not a very thoughtful person or you have a different agenda. Your exchange with “Sidecar” and your terrible idea makes me think you are not really a man going your own way either you still have a way to go or you are simply here to be disruptive.

[mozi-tzuParticipant 0]

Anonymous wrote:

Another option or doing both together is to save the money from never getting married, put it in a bank account for your child. When the child turns 18, get a lawyer to write to the child and say they have a large lump sum of money and are invited to visit the lawyers office to discuss.

At 18 the child is old enough to choose for themselves who the better parent is…

See my other response why the original idea is a bad one. This one is also bad for one thing it is not smart to put funds into bank accounts with the expectation of gaining any significant value from it. It is this type of thinking why there is a 1% who own and control 90% of the planet’s resources. Giving a large sum of money to a child is a pretty silly idea 99.99999% of them will simply spend it. and as a final f~~~ you they are very likely to spend it on dear mommy…hehehe 🙂 Is this some lame attempt to buy “love” SMDH.

A child/person is the sum total of their knowledge and experience how do you figure that they will be capable of making a decision on who the better parent is? For their entire 18yrs they have been indoctrinated into the status quo and more than likely what a terrible person you are. This is an even worse idea than the original as you are throwing away hard cash and time feeling guilt/shame whereas the original idea only required we waste our time feeling guilt/shame.

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