This story will really blow your mind…

Topic by NotHavinIt75

NotHavinIt75

Home Forums Relations~~~s This story will really blow your mind…

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  • #406594
    +12
    NotHavinIt75
    NotHavinIt75
    Participant
    39

    I’m new to the forum, and gotta say I’m loving it. This will be my first real contribution, as I don’t consider an “intro” post a contribution.

    Anyway, this is a true story, and it really happened to me in 2003-2004.

    I had somehow gotten patriotic a couple of weeks after 9/11 and decided to enlist in the Army National Guard. At age 27, I was a little bit older than most who enlist, but I was in decent shape and knew I could handle basic training. As it turned out, my mental maturity turned out to be a huge advantage. There were mostly 18-year old kids straight out of high school there, and one of them literally did cry for his “mommy” on the first night. Yeah, he didn’t live that one down for the entire 9 weeks!

    Anyway, back on topic. I was friends with a girl that I worked with. We’ll call her “Mary.” Mary was the front desk manager and I ran the restaurant. This was about four years before I enlisted in the military, so let’s say 1997.

    We worked together at the same hotel until the middle of 2000 until I went to help run my family’s business, and throughout that time we used to go out and drink together after work, and occasionally we would fool around a little bit. It was nothing serious. We both had serious relationships going on the time. We had never actually had sex, just some kissing and well, other stuff.

    After I left the hotel job, we still kept in touch. We would go out for dinner and a movie or maybe a little drinking, but there was no hanky-panky going on. We were strictly friends.

    The time came that it was my unit’s turn to deploy to Iraq. I had told most of my friends, and so of course many of them wanted to see me before I left, so I spent a lot of time in bars and restaurants the week before I left.

    The very last night that I could go out, I decided to meet a bunch of my friends at a local bar that we went to a lot. Everyone wanted to do a shot with me, and so as you can imagine, I was pretty tanked by the time the bartender yelled “last call!”

    I had already gone out with Mary and had dinner and we had said our goodbyes earlier on in the week. Still, it was my last night to go out as I had to pack and prepare all of my gear the next day, and then the day after that I would be leaving early in the morning for Fort Drum in upstate New York.

    Well, I wanted to get laid one last time before I might have to go a LONG TIME without any pussy. I went through all of the eligible female contacts on my Sprint flip phone (remember those). I tried old girlfriends, friends with benefits, and any other girl that I thought would be amenable to letting me come over and use her vagina for an hour or two. NOTHING!

    I came to Mary’s number, which was actually in the folder with all of my male friends’ numbers. Oh, did I forget to mention that Mary was definitely not what you’d consider a “looker?” Yeah. Not even close. Right about this time, though, the little head started to overpower the big head, and somehow my fingers dialed her number. She answered.

    “Uhhh, heyyy girrrl, it’s ME,” I slurred. She said “You’re drunk!” “OH YEAAHH,” I bellowed. Then I announced that I was coming over. There was a short pause, and then “OK.”

    I ended up spending the rest of the night and for the first time we went all the way. Hell, I knew it was going to be my last lay for maybe, well-EVER, so I got real freaky-deaky,if you know what I mean.

    I left early the next morning and thought all was well. Nothing was said about the matter and I figured we’d go on being friends just as we always had. I couldn’t have been more WRONG!

    My mother would write me frequently while I was in Iraq, and I had been noticing that she was starting to mention Mary’s name a lot more. She told me how helpful she was being, and how she was calling her and they were talking and even had been out to lunch together.

    At first, I wasn’t alarmed. I thought Mary was just being a good friend by being there for my mom. A lot of other friends also stopped by and called from time to time and brought stuff by for my mother to include in the packages that she sent me.

    A couple of months went by, though, and I began to get concerned. In the most recent letter I had received, my mother told me how Mary’s parents were going to be moving to Florida to retire and how she would have no place to stay. She said that she was going to offer her my little apartment on the second floor of their home, as I wouldn’t need it for quite a while. I wasn’t really comfortable with this, but I didn’t want to disappoint my mother, and I figured that her having Mary around was a comfort and kept her mind off of my being in a very dangerous place.

    I actually was quite upset at this point, as I didn’t know what Mary had been telling my mother. You can imagine the thoughts that ran through my mind. Did she tell her that we were a couple? Did she tell her that we were engaged? That I told her I loved her? What happened the night I spent with her?

    As you can well imagine, I had enough on my mind already, what with trying not to get shot or blown up and such. Now I had to deal with a fatal attraction too? Damn. Double bad luck!

    The time finally came that we were to leave Iraq and deploy back to the United States. By this time, Mary had been living with my parents for almost 10 months, rent free mind you. I paid rent when I lived there but this woman, who basically lied her way into staying in my apartment, was living there for free.

    When we arrived back in the US, I had a chance to use the telephone to call my family and let them know I was back safely. The subject came up and my mother told me that Mary was thinking that her and I could “share” the apartment since she had no other place to live and didn’t want to leave the state and move to Florida to stay with her parents.

    Well, I just LOST IT at that point! Everything about the situation had been building up in me and it finally came to a head and just exploded!

    “You tell that crazy bitch to pack her s~~~ and be the f~~~ out of my apartment before I get there!” I screamed. I immediately felt terrible. I had never raised my voice or spoken to my mother that way. It was just that I couldn’t take this manipulation anymore.

    After spending thirteen months in a war zone there was NO WAY I was going to come home and have some manipulative, crazy bitch living in my tiny apartment with me and pretending we’re husband and wife!

    I’m not sure what all went down at my home, but I know that when I got there five days later the crazy bastard was gone. I only spoke to Mary once after that, because I wanted to know why. She said that she fell in love with me that night and she thought that I felt the same way. She envisioned that when I came home we would be married and start a family.

    I asked her if I had ever told her if I loved her, or promised her that any of that stuff was going to happen when I got home. She said that I hadn’t. She explained that she just thought that we both felt something very special that night and she figured that it went without saying that we were “soul mates.” She just FIGURED that…

    After everything she had put me through, all the anxiety and pent up aggression and anger. Even after all that, I didn’t have the heart to tell her I was so drunk that I didn’t remember a f~~~ing thing from that night anyway!

    I learned a very harsh lesson about women from this fiasco. They will do just about anything in order to get what, or whom, they want!

    Well, that’s my story of how I was basically drawn into a relations~~~ that never even existed!

    If you don't want to do something, then DON'T!

    #406600
    +13
    Sky-O
    Sky-O
    Participant
    18936

    At least you didn’t get a letter from her while you were deployed saying that she was pregnant from the night she was with you. Then come home to her & the baby living at your place.

    #406611
    +6
    Shiroe
    Shiroe
    Participant
    139

    wow. That’s a crazy thot for you. You really are lucky that things did not get worse like a baby or that she did not make up an abuse charge against you so in a way you dodged a couple of bullets. Thank god or whoever that she is out of your life. Well now you have more understanding of this type of situation. You came to the right place here and made a MAJOR contribution by telling your story.

    cheers

    When a man looks inside himself and accepts he is no one. When he accepts he is nothing. Only then can he ascend to greatness

    #406613
    +5
    BlacqueJacqueShellacque
    BlacqueJacqueShellacque
    Participant
    6890

    This will be my first real contribution, as I don’t consider an “intro” post a contribution.

    It is. Welcome.

    #406614
    +5
    Experienced
    experienced
    Participant

    Women are like TV sitcoms. A guy is an auto mechanic (fine, respectable), but he lives in a house that’d fit a plastic surgeon’s income, and we’re not supposed to notice, because it’s a “happy show”.

    “She” in your story, just happens to “need a place” and we’re not supposed to notice that either. We’re supposed to accept that?
    Bulls~~~.

    This is why the laydeez are upset with any non-liberal win.
    It means the bottom line is the bottom line, and that’s not a “happy show” for them.

    “and how she would have no place to stay” =
    She chose not to rent.
    She chose not to move with her parents.
    Her parents were moving to shake off the worthless hairbag.

    "It seems like there's times a body gets struck down so low, there ain't a power on earth that can ever bring him up again. Seems like something inside dies so he don't even want to get up again. But he does."

    #406628
    +5

    Anonymous
    42

    Her sandcastle got hit by a tidal wave! I wish I saw the shock on her face when the wave came over the top and hit her in the face and washed all her fantasies away!

    #406648
    +3
    Silver Fox
    Silver Fox
    Participant
    2766

    I honestly thought you were going to find out she was pregnant or something. What a relief for you. 🙂

    "Are you loosed from a wife? Do not seek a wife." --Apostle Paul

    #406690
    +5
    Awakened
    Awakened
    Participant
    35202

    Booze AND Women = Fire AND Gasoline

    In a World of Justin Beibers Be a Johnny Cash

    #406734
    +2
    Buller100
    Buller100
    Participant
    2189

    Booze AND Women = Fire AND Gasoline

    Welcome to the board , great to see you are back from war zone safe.

    The above is bang on, how many guys when drunk have said a thing to a girl and being men follow it up, women are predators and what gets me is we are told they do better in school , told they get better jobs .. but 99% are still looking for a meal ticket.

    Sadly I know some guys whose lives have been decimated again and again , if you were unlucky enough to get involved and get divorced … if you steer clear of relationships you soon build equity..

    #406907
    +4

    Anonymous
    13

    Welcome.

    That’s a bizarre story regarding Mary.

    She claims she loved you and she thought you loved her back. SO, did she initiate any kind of contact with you while you were deployed away, letters, texts, anything at all?

    A woman ‘in love’ would try to make contact, you’d think. You were away a long time.

    On the other hand, she got rent free board for around a year?

    Sorry, I’m somewhat cynical and feel her story to be fishy.

    #406962
    +1
    Experienced
    experienced
    Participant

    That’s a bizarre story regarding Mary.
    She claims she loved you and she thought you loved her back. SO, did she initiate any kind of contact with you while you were deployed away, letters, texts, anything at all?
    A woman ‘in love’ would try to make contact, you’d think. You were away a long time.
    On the other hand, she got rent free board for around a year?
    Sorry, I’m somewhat cynical and feel her story to be fishy.

    Her story perfectly fits the “dysfunctional family network” kind of girl.
    They Never discuss anything directly with the party involved, NO, they seek roundabout ways of communication, guilt, MANipulation, mistrust, scapegoat targeting, uncomfortable fact suppression, actual abuse facilitation, truth suppression, etc.
    They bring to the table, in addition to nothing, the HUNGER for setting up a whorenets nest of unsolvable problems which can only be dealt with for the male by his leaving (after his $$ and future $$ are harvested).

    The mom doesn’t want what’s good for the son, she wants what’s good for herself, a grandchild.

    "It seems like there's times a body gets struck down so low, there ain't a power on earth that can ever bring him up again. Seems like something inside dies so he don't even want to get up again. But he does."

    #407066
    +3
    NotHavinIt75
    NotHavinIt75
    Participant
    39

    Welcome.

    That’s a bizarre story regarding Mary.

    She claims she loved you and she thought you loved her back. SO, did she initiate any kind of contact with you while you were deployed away, letters, texts, anything at all?

    A woman ‘in love’ would try to make contact, you’d think. You were away a long time.

    On the other hand, she got rent free board for around a year?

    Sorry, I’m somewhat cynical and feel her story to be fishy.

    Yes, she did send me letters and packages while I was away.

    Apparently, she claims that she always loved me ever since when we first met, but that she couldn’t tell if I felt the same way, so she thought it was just better to maintain a friendship.

    I don’t know the reasoning behind it, as it’s classic female thinking and I will never claim to understand that.

    I’m thinking it’s one of those “waiting in the wings” type of things. For instance, she pretends not to care about my promiscuity or relations~~~s with with other women, figuring that one day I’ll come to my senses and realize that my true love has always been right in front of me, and guess what? It’s HER!

    It’s the classic fairy tale/chick flick ending: Guy and girl are friends. Guy and girl have numerous relationships with other people that never end up working. Guy and girl finally realize they are supposed to be together and ride off into the sunset to live the American Nightmare, etc…

    I also believe that she thought if she could charm my parents into her corner (which she did), then that would put pressure on me to just go along and make everyone happy (except myself, of course).

    I mean, she definitely did a number on my mom. The worst part of it is that they are friendly even to this very day. They still exchange Christmas presents and she has even come out to visit my parents a couple of times. Of course, I didn’t so much as look at her when she was around. Her calls went unanswered, and I wouldn’t even come to the door when she tried to come over to my place.

    She hasn’t tried to come out since 2008, so I’m guessing that it’s finally over, although my mother makes it a point to let me know from time to time that “Mary is still single ya know.” I just say “That’s no surprise,” and carry on with my business.

    If you don't want to do something, then DON'T!

    #407112
    +2
    Balthazar
    Balthazar
    Participant
    722

    At least you didn’t get a letter from her while you were deployed saying that she was pregnant from the night she was with you. Then come home to her & the baby living at your place.

    i thought this same thing immediately upon reading the part of her initial cozying up to your mother.

    I’m not a religious man, but I am a spiritual man and i would say even if it’s been some time you should thank: your lucky stars, J Christ, God, the universe, your maker, the higher power, chi, prana, your karma cycle, the one without another etc. etc., however the hell you want to say it. you dodged quite a few bullets there and some acknowledgement of and gratitude for being in a good life flow or having some extra magic juju on your side probably wouldn’t hurt.

    This body holding me is a reminder of my own mortality. Embrace this moment. Remember, we are eternal and all this pain is an illusion.

    #408086
    NotHavinIt75
    NotHavinIt75
    Participant
    39

    At least you didn’t get a letter from her while you were deployed saying that she was pregnant from the night she was with you. Then come home to her & the baby living at your place.

    i thought this same thing immediately upon reading the part of her initial cozying up to your mother.

    I’m not a religious man, but I am a spiritual man and i would say even if it’s been some time you should thank: your lucky stars, J Christ, God, the universe, your maker, the higher power, chi, prana, your karma cycle, the one without another etc. etc., however the hell you want to say it. you dodged quite a few bullets there and some acknowledgement of and gratitude for being in a good life flow or having some extra magic juju on your side probably wouldn’t hurt.

    I don’t see the whole “baby” thing as dodging a bullet, really, because I knew there was no chance of pregnancy. I used a top quality condom and loaded it with extra spermicide (always do this) and I always make it a habit to go right to the bathroom after and flush it, because I’ve heard of women stealing the semen and using a turkey baster to inseminate themselves. That’s why I make sure I’M the one to take off the condom and dispose of it immediately. Believe me, I have had a chick or two say “Let me get that for you.” Thanks, but NO THANKS!

    I’d say it was more aggravation and a feeling of helplessness. Here I am in Iraq (the asshole of the world, for real), and I’ve got some chick running ramshackle all over my life back home. Sleeping in my bed, probably wearing my clothes, sweet talking my parents, and who the hell knows what else…

    I’m not a hugely spiritual person myself, but I do believe in God and the fact that there is something bigger than all of us out there. However, I also believe that what happens to us in our life is brought on by the series of decisions that WE choose to make.

    I don’t believe there is some outside being controlling what happens to us while we are here on Earth. I believe that we are always presented with choices, and the ones we make may not affect us right away, but could affect us years down the road. That’s why I always take time and choose very carefully. Most of my choices in the last 8 years exclude women, and I have never been so happy.

    I really feel the only person I have to thank is myself, for having the strength to endure the bulls~~~ and still keep my head on straight while I was in a war zone, and for having the strength to tell my parents to throw the bitch out and not allow her within miles of me on my return home. I’m sure weaker men (what I call “go along guys”) would have succumbed and tried a relationship with her.

    There were pressures from both of my parents to date this girl. They absolutely loved her. What she said and did to achieve this I’ll never know, but she must have had some serious manipulation skills. I was angry at my mom for a while, although I would never let her know it. She’s the only woman I have ever trusted and probably the only woman I will ever be able to trust.

    Believe me, I felt like telling her “If you were lonely then you could have gotten a damn dog, not moved in some slag I used to get a last load out!” I would never, though. It’s on me. I did the deed, so I guess I can’t be angry at my parents.

    I CAN be angry at that crazy broad, though! I could see if I had made all these promises to her, but to my knowledge all I said was “Thanks. Can I get a towel? OK see ya. Write me if you want.”

    I guess you’re right in a way, though, getting out of the whole thing relatively unscathed is dodging a bullet.

    If there is a higher power out there that helped me get through it, than I am thankful for that. If there is karma, hopefully it will be on my side when it comes to this matter.

    If you don't want to do something, then DON'T!

    #408487
    +1
    Balthazar
    Balthazar
    Participant
    722

    what i would say in response to that is, maybe you are the higher power that you may or may not choose to believe in. the idea of man being created in God’s image is more likely the fact that any level of being is a direct reflection of all the levels of organization above and below it. so goes the saying: as above so below, as within so without. there isn’t a man in the sky choosing your life for you. but maybe you are already all of the higher and lower levels of organization that influence and govern you to make the choices that you do. and the fact that you conduct yourself in a thoughtful and responsible manner is proof that you’re already in touch with your own “higher power”, it’s not something separate from yourself willing you. you are it. but without it pre existing you, you wouldn’t be you. so my point in making an act of acknowledgement is more just gratitude that you’re alive and able to act within and with it. haha.

    This body holding me is a reminder of my own mortality. Embrace this moment. Remember, we are eternal and all this pain is an illusion.

    #408494
    +1
    NotHavinIt75
    NotHavinIt75
    Participant
    39

    what i would say in response to that is, maybe you are the higher power that you may or may not choose to believe in. the idea of man being created in God’s image is more likely the fact that any level of being is a direct reflection of all the levels of organization above and below it. so goes the saying: as above so below, as within so without. there isn’t a man in the sky choosing your life for you. but maybe you are already all of the higher and lower levels of organization that influence and govern you to make the choices that you do. and the fact that you conduct yourself in a thoughtful and responsible manner is proof that you’re already in touch with your own “higher power”, it’s not something separate from yourself willing you. you are it. but without it pre existing you, you wouldn’t be you. so my point in making an act of acknowledgement is more just gratitude that you’re alive and able to act within and with it. haha.

    I hear what you’re saying. Makes sense.

    I will say that it wasn’t something that I learned overnight. I would have to say that it took years of getting s~~~ on and doing favors for people that I didn’t want to do and basically not being able to say “NO” to anybody.

    I was that guy that everyone would call for a “small” favor (as if there is such a things as a “small favor). People knew I wouldn’t refuse, plain and simple. I was, more or less, a pushover.

    It took me a long time before I was able to come out and say “NO.” When I was finally able to do it, though, boy it felt liberating!

    Also, I realized that when I say “no,” that’s all that’s necessary. I don’t have to explain myself or give an excuse. At first I used to feel the need to lie or come up with some excuse as to why I couldn’t do this small “favor.”

    Now when I refuse I just say “no” and that’s all. People often stand there with a puzzled look on their face waiting for an explanation. After a few seconds of awkward silence they usually get the hint and walk away!

    I don’t like to get into religious discussions, that’s why I wasn’t more specific about my beliefs, but I do believe in a higher power.

    You made an interesting point about one becoming their own higher power, though. It’s definitely worth thinking about. I’m thinking that if anything, a person’s belief in their higher power can help and aid them in becoming who they are by influencing their thoughts and actions. There has to be an element of free will involved, though, in that the decision you make has a direct effect on whatever situation you are dealing with in your life.

    If you don't want to do something, then DON'T!

    #409597
    BR01097
    BR01097
    Participant
    8

    Somehow just reading the first few sentences I could figure you a douche.

    #409652
    +1
    Experienced
    experienced
    Participant

    Somehow just reading the first few sentences I could figure you a douche.

    F~~~ You BR01097 = Tuna

    "It seems like there's times a body gets struck down so low, there ain't a power on earth that can ever bring him up again. Seems like something inside dies so he don't even want to get up again. But he does."

    #409664
    NotHavinIt75
    NotHavinIt75
    Participant
    39

    Somehow just reading the first few sentences I could figure you a douche.

    Well, that may be true. You are entitled to your opinion, of course.

    However, it’s hard to understand how one could claim to know another by these few sentences:

    I’m new to the forum, and gotta say I’m loving it. This will be my first real contribution, as I don’t consider an “intro” post a contribution.

    Anyway, this is a true story, and it really happened to me in 2003-2004.

    Anyway, all I can say is I’m not going anywhere, so hopefully we can at least learn to get along in the forum.

    Have a great day. 🙂

    If you don't want to do something, then DON'T!

    #409678
    +1
    FrostByte
    FrostByte
    Participant
    19005

    Booze AND Women = Fire AND Gasoline

    Ditto that.
    I never made a good decision under the influence of either, but when combined you can royally f~~~ yourself.

    If you rescue a damsel in distress, all you will get is a distressed damsel.

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