Jesus – referring to that eHarmony article on 15 reasons to date a single mom!
1. She’s no wimp. Single moms are tough and independent.
Translation: she’s a ball-busting bitch – her nag dial is set to KILL most of the time, not STUN.
2. She’s already a great mom. (And weren’t you looking for someone who would be a great mother? Look no further!)
WTF??? Because her uterus squeezed out a baby that automatically qualifies her for the Mother Hall of Fame??? Hey, yesterday I pinched a loaf off that looked like Roseanne Barr – does that qualify me for an award too? WHY is she single with a kid, anyway? How come that’s not important? Also, this tells me nothing about how many ex-convicts she’s currently banging or how she’s torturing whoever the unhappy father is, whose life is now damaged through child support and legal fees, if not vagimony as well, as well as her constant mindgames turning his children against him.
3. She’s incredibly patient, but doesn’t have a lot of tolerance for bad behavior. She’ll be good for you.
She’ll emasculate you before you can say “Jack Robinson”, but I’m sure she tolerates HER own bad behavior just fine. Like deep-throating the taxi driver for a free ride home after getting drunk with her friends while you were out of town.
4. She doesn’t play games. She doesn’t have time to just fool around. She takes her relationships seriously.
Really? Then why is she a single mom? She sure did fool around even if it was only once, and the fact that she is single completely contradicts the ‘takes her relationships seriously’ BS.
5. She’ll only keep you around if the relationship is a good thing for both her and her kids. You won’t have to guess if she’s into you.
Keep in mind that this article is attempting to explain to men why they should date this SM. Translation: you are completely at her mercy, her kids are what matters to you and you’d better behave exactly as she wants (see #3) or you get the boot; not your wallet if she’s trapped you into another kid, just you. As far as guessing is she’s into you – she’s not, she’s into your wallet, dumbazz.
6. Single moms are easy to pamper. (They don’t get breaks very often. Hint, hint.)
Translation: empty your wallet, mangina.
7. She’s loyal — and is fiercely protective of her little brood.
Loyal to whom? Herself, her gal-pack of hymen hyenas and her kids, certainly not to you.
8. She can articulate what she wants and needs from a relationship.
Seriously??? It’s now a positive that a female can express what she wants and needs? THAT’S ALL SHE EVER FKING TALKS ABOUT ANYWAY THESE DAYS AND SHE DOESN’T HAVE TO HAVE A RUGRAT TO DO THIS!
9. Single moms are both practical and fun. There’s no room for diva behavior.
This nauseating list is chock full of these ridiculous generalizations, as if every SM is identical. Practical?? FUN??? Practical that she needs a man to pay for her and her brood, and if you think the female is no diva then I’ve got an ice concession to sell you in Norway.
10. She’s no longer a party girl, but a fun night out is still very welcome.
Translation: She doesn’t stuff her face and other orifices full of c~~~s 6 nights a week and has cut down to a more manageable 4 nights a week so she can spend some quality time with her child, when whatever orbiting mangina that’s #1 on her speed dial isn’t babystitting for her CGEs (C~~~-Gobbling Expeditions).
11. She’s selfless. Single moms put others’ needs before their own.
O.M.G. That is the most awful crock of sh1t I have ever seen. No further comment.
12. Moms make the best lasagna and give the best back rubs.
That’s because manginas like lasagna – the moms call it mansagna. No question about it, that’s the reason I want to date a fat chick with a brood because she can reheat store-bought lasagna and then lavish me with a back rub for 5 minutes before she gets tired. How about instead a fat fking ribeye and a BJ for dessert??
13. You’ll get to take part in adventures to amusement parks, the zoo and the park. Bonus: You’ll have an excuse to play with toys.
And your credit card will too. The only toys I’d play with involve sex toys with her, otherwise stuff your pandas and Leggos. They forgot the added bonus of hating every second of hanging out with her ill-behaved brats while she tortures you with stories about how evil all her exes were, which means you will make that list when she’s done with you as well.
14. She’s adaptable. She knows that life doesn’t always go as planned and has learned how to make the best of it.
They are 100% correct. She will adapt into whatever female she thinks you want in order to trap you into supporting mobile DNA remnants from another man, until you are committed emotionally and financially, at which point she will adapt again into a harpie from h@ll and make your life miserable.
15. Single moms can do it all, but are super-appreciative of a helping hand. Woo her with kindness and acts of service.
And here eHarmony spells it out for you if you’re too dumb to have noticed yet – you are expected to supplicate yourself before this independent female who doesn’t need anything at all from you (since they can do it all), so be sure to provide all kinds of services to her. Your first service is as an ATM. Your second is as a doormat.
They close with: Why else should one date a single mom?
That question should have been this: Why WOULD anyone date a single mom?
That list is actually from a dating website attempting to encourage the dimwitted, brain-damaged and/or blue pill addicts to entrap themselves with females already incapable of having a relationship with the prior sucker (‘sperm donor’), which means the reality is probably far worse than the picture I painted if that’s the best that they could do! The bottom line is that unless she’s a widow than WHY is the last idiot before you gone?
GoneGalt 5 years ago.
