THE RED PILL IS THE ONLY WAY!

[Anonymous 3]

Gentlemen, I remember a time before the Red Pill. I was in pain, an emotional pain diguised as something else: sex starvation. You see, my wife did not appear to be into sex, and I tried everything…

One day I found a guy on the internet saying things that made a lot of sense. Essentially he was talking about a man being a MAN, in the sense of taking responsibility for his house, his family, and his wife. A Real Man ™ would be a “wife whisperer”, would cause deep feeling on his wife, and she would respond… with sex.

You see the trap here? I was into these things for sex.

But strangely the first thing I learned was NOT TO BE DESPERATE. In fact, in order to get sex I first had to let go of sex. Doing that was in itself was a revelation, it showed me how much of my life revolved around trying to pander to my wife in order to get sex.

I learned about self-validation, as much of my measure of worth was attached to her judgment. I learned about my values, respecting and upholding them. I learned about my responsibilities to myself and my family, not putting my wife above everything.

It was two years of hard work, and I had less sex than ever. But one thing I started noticing was: I was getting to be exactly the person I was before marriage. This realization came as a surprise, and I could not understand how that change had happened.

But my wife was not getting happier with all the changes, that were supposed to make me more attractive to her. She appeared to be getting frustrated…

And another thing I noticed in our little online community of “wife whisperers”: managing your wife was a full time job.
There was never a time when they would relax and let you relax. No matter how successful a man was financially, socially or emotionally, the wife would never let go. We were told that women did these thing to make you better, that the cleaver “wife whisperer” would look into what they where saying to see if there was room for his improvement, or listen to what they didnt say to recognize an emotional need that the man should address.

I remember a guy that finally had enough of it and said that it was to much work, that women were simply insane and that he was not going to put up with them anymore. At the time I was disappointed with him, to me he was a man that DID NOT TRY HARD ENOUGH. After all, that is what a man is all about, TRYING HARDER, NEVER GIVING UP.

One day we were at the supermarket, and we had a quarrel about chicken. I finally snapped and realized the truth: it is impossible to make a woman happy. A few days later I came to an even greater realization: that I wanted to make her happy because I loved her. That is the result of taking sex out of the equation, it allowed me to see that MY REAL NEED WAS EMOTIONAL. And the most important conclusion was: MY WIFE NEVER TRIED TO MAKE ME HAPPY, and therefore SHE NEVER LOVED ME.

With this I reevaluated all my marriage and understood that I was the “backup plan”, the safe beta that she resorted to after leaving her alpha bad boy. But even so, I was not beta enough, so she started working on me, using my emotional needs to gain total dominance. She had made me a slave, a brainwashed emotionally abused beast of work.

With all this understanding there was only one thing missing: I still believed that I had chosen poorly, that I had bad luck, that somewhere there was a woman for me that would love me and treat me right.

Until I stumbled on Sandman videos and learned about MGTOW.

I already had learned a lot, but I finally realized AWALT. There is no woman out there that will treat me right. There is no woman that will reciprocate my efforts to make her happy. Instead they use these things as tools of control.

They are control freaks because they are inherently afraid.
When you fear abandon you need to control the other, you try to create a dependency so that the other doesnt leave you. When you fear poverty you need to hoard things and get money. When you fear that you are meaningless, you try to be the center of attention by whatever means. When you fear that others dont care you try to get sympathy.

They are never happy because of it. And they will drag you into that drama filled mess they create for themselves.

That is why there is no other way for a man to get peace, quiet, contentment and security, other than the red pill.

This is an inevitable conclusion. You can only fool yourself to avoid it; for how long? Enough to realize it to late?

This is not a product that we are selling, unlike the “wife whisperer” training that I had. I dont regret doing it though, because it allowed me to get to the red pill.

But you have it here for free, for your safety and happiness. Ignore it at your peril.

[CPT ObviousParticipant 2730]

This is obviously an excellent and thoughtful post. Thanks—-had some things I needed to hear.

"You don't know a woman till you have met her in divorce court."

[MonkParticipant 16994]

Anonymous wrote:

… it showed me how much of my life revolved around trying to pander to my wife in order to get sex.

The Blue Pill world in a nutshell.

They can dress it up, but that’s what it comes down to. Trading resources for sex.

[Puffin StuffParticipant 24979]

You can’t negotiate with the boss. Women are trained that they are boss by default. They pretend to discuss with you but it’s really just to “handle” you. There is no negotiation. There is only mgtow.

#icethemout; Remember Thomas Ball. He died for your children.

[WallyParticipant]

Great post, glad you found Sandman before goinng down that road again. I have several friends who got married three times, if only they had a sandman or Barbarossa after their first marriage it could have saved them so much hardship.

Occasionally, I hear some dude say ” happy wife, happy life.” But then I remember reading an article that research found out women are only happy when their husbands are stressed and unhappy. So every time I hear a dude say that it makes me sigh, but not for the reasons he thinks. When I used to go to church the men would call their wives the “boss.” Their sons and daughter see this but then the scripture says the man should be the head- no wonder marriages are so screwed up.

"what a waste of a life, to marry, give up your freedom, just for the hope of not dying alone. Don't get married Son."

[Puffin StuffParticipant 24979]

We raised our son together. 50/50 as possible. All about fair. One thing my son has never seen is a woman boss me around. When asked he says he doesn’t want to get married and have kids but he’s only 22. It’ll be a few more years to see if he learned anything from his father.

#icethemout; Remember Thomas Ball. He died for your children.

[Prefer Peace to PieceParticipant 10809]

Clu

Great post.

When I was younger, I thought that sex was the only effective tool women used to manipulate men. I was wrong.

I came to realize that women played my emotional makeup like a violin.
No matter how hard I tried to please a woman, it wasn’t enough. I tried harder and harder. I concluded that it wasn’t worth the effort. Women used constant criticism, nagging, and complaining non-stop as tools of manipulation. Women were never thankful or appreciative.

I found that the only time life was serene and peaceful was when no women were around.

There may have been a time when women were different. I don’t know. But now, in the Western world it’s a no brainer. MGTOW is the only option.

[Gravel PitParticipant]

Thanks Clu. Glad I found Sandman too, instantly infatuated and took to mgtow naturally. Saved me a lot of self shame and confusion. Stardusk saved me from ignorance that leads to worse pain.

Prefer Peace to Piece wrote:

I found that the only time life was serene and peaceful was when no women were around.

Thats the key and magic of it. When I had a HER, I was self conscious, stressed, worried about sex, embarassed by sex, bullied by her bombastic attitude, demands and judgements. And then maybe Id get a few hugs or some pity… Its a Net sh!tty deal in the end. Better not to even talk to them because theyre all whacko

[Anonymous 3]

Prefer Peace to Piece wrote:

There may have been a time when women were different. I don’t know. But now, in the Western world it’s a no brainer. MGTOW is the only option.

My grandmother had huge conflicts with her mother-in-law, and they lived at the same house. Needless to say, my grandfather had to manage the problem between the two women, while working for his father.

There was a Brazilian tribe on the Amazon, that featured a documentary because of its special language, that is called “the happiness language”, and apparently they are very happy people. Yet in that documentary the man fears his wife will complain when he fails to catch fish. And certainly the wife starts nagging the man for not catching fish.

There is a Sumerian letter from 3000 BC were a rich women complains to the husband, that was traveling in business, that he had not given her enough money, and the neighbors already had a bigger house.

So, from these examples we can see that the Bible was accurate when speaking about women:

Proverbs 14:1
The wisest of women builds her house, but folly with her own hands tears it down.

Proverbs 21:9
It is better to live in a corner of the housetop than in a house shared with a quarrelsome wife.

Proverbs 21:19
It is better to live in a desert land than with a quarrelsome and fretful woman.

Proverbs 31:10
An excellent wife who can find? She is far more precious than jewels.

Its is nothing new, it is not just Western women. AWAWLT – All Women
Always Were Like That.

[TaxGuyParticipant]

Wally wrote:

Occasionally, I hear some dude say ” happy wife, happy life.” But then I remember reading an article that research found out women are only happy when their husbands are stressed and unhappy. So every time I hear a dude say that it makes me sigh, but not for the reasons he thinks. When I used to go to church the men would call their wives the “boss.” Their sons and daughter see this but then the scripture says the man should be the head- no wonder marriages are so screwed up.

One more time – 99% of men and 100% of women will read the phrase “Happy Wife Happy Life” and think that it gives women the right to act like a bitch and make the man fix it. It’s not a permission slip gentlemen, it’s a warning. If a woman lacks the capacity to be happy on her own (a happy wife) then you will never find happiness yourself (happy life). A miserable woman will make sure your life is miserable as well.

Of course the other path to happiness is no wife.

Order the good wine

[WPLParticipant 2390]

I cannot stand that “happy wife, happy life” line. My ex-wife began using that phrase after she started hanging out with a group of “ladies” who all could not work for various, dubious reasons (one was too tired from “PCOS”; one was too “busy” with crafting and gardening; etc.). These hens would use that line to justify their staying at home. This group also encouraged my ex to run off with “Chad”… but I digress.

No wife = contented life.

TaxGuy wrote:

Wally wrote:

Occasionally, I hear some dude say ” happy wife, happy life.” But then I remember reading an article that research found out women are only happy when their husbands are stressed and unhappy. So every time I hear a dude say that it makes me sigh, but not for the reasons he thinks. When I used to go to church the men would call their wives the “boss.” Their sons and daughter see this but then the scripture says the man should be the head- no wonder marriages are so screwed up.

One more time – 99% of men and 100% of women will read the phrase “Happy Wife Happy Life” and think that it gives women the right to act like a bitch and make the man fix it. It’s not a permission slip gentlemen, it’s a warning. If a woman lacks the capacity to be happy on her own (a happy wife) then you will never find happiness yourself (happy life). A miserable woman will make sure your life is miserable as well.
Of course the other path to happiness is no wife.

[TaxGuyParticipant]

WPL wrote:

I cannot stand that “happy wife, happy life” line. My ex-wife began using that phrase after she started hanging out with a group of “ladies” who all could not work for various, dubious reasons (one was too tired from “PCOS”; one was too “busy” with crafting and gardening; etc.). These hens would use that line to justify their staying at home. This group also encouraged my ex to run off with “Chad”… but I digress.

No wife = contented life.

And let me take one guess: Short of winning the lottery there was NOTHING you could do that would make her happy. Hell, if a woman said she’d be happy if her husband took her out to dinner every Friday night he’d do it. If she said she hated doing the grocery shopping, he’d do it.

But when the bell rings 100 times in a row and there’s never any food there, well Pavlov’s experiment was stupid. The dog will never make the connection between the bell and the food.

Order the good wine

[bstoffParticipant 4865]

“Happy wife happy life” was something my second wife’s parents pushed on me, it was mandatory viewing by my FIL, who was the pastor officiating our wedding.
At the time, it made perfect sense. I was recently divorced, and thought I learned a lesson from that failed marriage.

But the second marriage taught me “happy wife happy life” was a trap, enslaving me to the woman who would never be happy. Thus, I would never be happy.

Once I realized there was no correct answers to her questions and no correct way to do anything, I started living for my own pleasure and it drove her nuts!
Once she realized she no longer controlled me, she cut her losses and pretended to be a victim of my indifference.
Of course, she hinted that it was “abusive”, somehow and she got a lot of sympathy from it.

Marriage?
Never again.

[Anonymous 3]

Great posts from everybody, a tribute to the power of the red pill!

Matrix, your turn to post the next subject. Let’s alternate the titles from the list…

[tripvanParticipant 193]

bstoff wrote:

Once I realized there was no correct answers to her questions and no correct way to do anything, I started living for my own pleasure and it drove her nuts!Once she realized she no longer controlled me, she cut her losses and pretended to be a victim of my indifference.Of course, she hinted that it was “abusive”, somehow and she got a lot of sympathy from it.
Marriage?Never again.

And when they decide their actions are your fault and start blaming you for the outcomes – gold.

[EGParticipant 1853]

I look around this awesome little place that I’ve put together and I think about all the people I wish I could share it with, and I come up with nothing.

[Author]

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