T minus 30 days and counting

[Anonymous 43]

hello. I am not an attorney. this is not legal advice nor should this thread constitute legal advice. this is for entertainment purposes only. consult an attorney before doing any of the following.

this thread is for you poor saps who married the one special snowflake and she turned sour on you recently. see how she rates on this check list:

no more sex
no appreciation for little things you do
no appreciation for big things you do
hitting you
berating you at home
berating you in public
accusing you of f~~~ing every woman in the neighborhood
accusing you of f~~~ing the cashier at a mall an hour away
making you clean up after a party she holds for her girlfriends
involvement in pyramid marketing: pampered chef, candle parties, sex toys, avon, amway
damages to your car
accumulating credit cards without your knowledge
threats of suicide after minor arguments
hitting your children
bagging on you to her family behind yr back
taking phone calls out of the room
girls night out, then girls weekend out
coming back with new tattoos
new friends, divorced or single mothers
social media addiction
classmate.com membership
obsession with working out
sudden interest in make up
new hair style
new interest in charity work for no apparent reason
she says im not happy.

if this list seems like the way your life is going, she will most certainly divorce you. there is no reform for your special snowflake. that was the road I walked down. how far behind me are you?

prepare now. Prepare now, today. tomorrow will be too late, its now or never your life wont wait. I had 5 minutes to vacate my house at the point of two drawn police issued glock 19s. I walked away from a house I renovated, landscaped, resided and reroofed. I left behind three cars, handed the keys to a policeman, and walked away. it was 8pm, it started to rain, and I discovered the c~~~ left $66 in the checking account. I was wearing a blue tshirt, tan shorts, sandals and carried a small safe with the contents of the filing cabinet that I photocopied the night before. my brother was visiting me, he was held at gunpoint as well. by sheer luck, his car was not impounded also. my special snowflake also had an 8 week no contact order with her and my kids. this was July xx 2009. I had nothing but clothes on my back, some paper, and my bro. do not be caught out like I was. I did not see my kids again until almost the middle of October 2009.

if you want to have a better start to your new life, here are some suggestions. I am not an attorney. I am a survivor of the most heinous betrayal any of us will ever experience. consult with an attorney before doing what this “loser” tells you to do.

first of all congratulations and welcome to the club. you are a loser, piece of s~~~, idiot. get over that right now. it isn’t yer fault your special snowflake lost her mind. if you were a cheating sack of crap, you deserved it.

she will get your house, your cars, 1/2 your savings, and you will pay alimony for life, and kid expenses for 18 years, mandatory life insurance. this is written in stone. maybe you can alter the deal slightly depending on circumstances. probably not. pray judge vader does not alter the deal any further

survive. that is your goal.

the holy trinity of criminals: cash, hiding place, transportation
yes I said criminal. she is filing a complaint against you in divorce court. she is the plaintiff. you are the defendant. you are a criminal. justice is not blind here. you prove your innocence here, not prosecutor proves guilt. things imagined by the c~~~ are seriously investigated. this is the most upside down set of rules you have ever seen. rule number 1, you, my man, are f~~~ed. you will have an expanding drywall anchor pounded into yer bungus, and torqued down. at some point, someone will pull the anchor out. this the wounding you will get. enjoy.

cash…you need it. credit cards…you need this too. new checking account…this is vital You decide how much cash you need.
my lawyers charged $200/hr research/paperwork and $400/hr in court, $100 to talk to paralegal. in 7 years I spent $195,000 in legal fees. yeah, we had 90 motions, 125 court appearances, continuances and other bulls~~~ in between 8/2009 to today.

you need 6 months living expenses minimum. cash.

consult with attorney concerning protecting investments, assets and other property

hiding place. at minimum you need a small storage unit. pay cash for this. pay 3 months in advance. cash is untraceable.there you will store the following:

filing cabinet
copies of important papers, do not take originals.
house papers, investment account papers, car titles, passports, ss cards, birth certificates, marriage license, gun ownership papers, insurance,tax returns, business papers

laptop, scanner/printer/copier, lots of ink. binders, post it, paperclips you know, office stuff. your life has work, personal, now a legal department.

important!!!!! do not take originals. taking originals results in obstruction charges in many states. no one said anything about keeping orderly files at home. consult attorney on this.

several changes of clothes, work clothes, casual clothes, and shoes. you need a suit nice shirt and dress shoes, tie.

heirlooms, family things you inherited etc

hiding place 2 …apartment.
I recommend near a college campus, at least an hour away from your old home. rent is cheaper usually, however you may not like living with 20 somethings. get the highest floor on a corner. this will be quieter and more secure. what thug climbs three flights of stairs to rip you off? if anyone asks you are a doctoral candidate or a visiting professor. college campus also has a dining hall with cheap good food maybe you can use rec facility for free. campus security is not afraid of domestic disputes like the city cops.

stay away from the 20 something girls. no no no no no no tempting, but no. you will have all the drama you can handle.

hiding place 3 rent a mailbox. this is your new address. all mail goes here. your soon to be ex will be given this address. when she loses her mind and wants to do damage to you, better she roll up to a minimall or a federal post office to unleash her rage than your apartment.

transportation. you need a car. I recommend a beige Honda accord, last generation at best, 2 gen ago at worst, no older or a white pickup truck. you want something reliable and you want to blend in, and you want to be comfortable. do not get it in your name. give it to a family member you trust and has nothing to do with the 200 pounds of ugly fat you are about to lose. transfer title after divorce is signed.

ok, cash, hiding place and transportation.

lawyer
get one.

visit as many lawyers in your time zone as you can. every single one of them. first consult is free. find an ass kicking woman. find a bitch to out bitch your bitch’s bitch. visiting all the lawyers technically makes you their client. your snowflake can’t use a lawyer you consulted with. if lawyer does take her on, this is conflict of interest. keep all the lawyer cards and the date and time you visited. lawyers looooove to bust other lawyers.

next, you need to keep a diary. record where you went, what you wore, what you are doing, who you met, things you did. you need to keep receipts, documents, paper trail is everything. get used to doing this for the next 10 years. you need an alibi. you are a criminal, remember? over document.

if the c~~~ accuses you of assault, harassment, stalking, battery, hit and run, vandalism, child abuse, sexual assault, jaywalking…you have an alibi, more importantly, you have the habit of keeping a journal. she will have the habit of making up random bulls~~~. I spent $200k on defending myself against random bulls~~~. the journal saved my ass 9 times. the c~~~ damaged her own property, car and her body 9 times to get me arrested for random bulls~~~. lol.

get a new email address for dealing with lawyer.

get a new email address for dealing with the c~~~.

never never never confuse the two, do not link the two into 1 email. keep these separate.

email to ex should consist of the vacation response “send all correspondence to attorney’s name, address and phone number. then have someone else set a new password to that account.

do not ever answer her emails ever.

never ever ever go back to your old house. the old house was flattened by an f5 tornado, fell into a sinkhole, hit by a mile wide asteroid and accidentally nuked by a runaway ICBM all at the same time. you poor unlucky bastard.

let her figure out what to do with all yer s~~~. do not take any of it back. none of it. not yer undies, not yer diploma, not your car. nothing. it is all irradiated toxic sludge to you. my ex c~~~ put tracking devices in my car, three of them. and listening devices in my stuff. yes that bat s~~~ crazy.

do not go back to ex for any reason. no hook ups, no how do you fix this, come and get yer s~~~…no contact.

failmart burner phone for her calls only. do no talk to her. text only. text only “yes, no or I don’t know.” you can not reason with the c~~~. logical explanation will not work, and is evidence against you, remember you are the criminal, Miranda laws apply at all times. anything you say will be used against you in a court of law. you thought that was only good on law and order? lol don’t be an idiot.

pickup and drop off kids at a mcdonalds or gas station or police station. . be early. buy something and keep the receipt. be on camera. let her leave first. stay there for as long as it take for her to get home, and double it. protect your self from random bulls~~~ she imagines.

I spent $200,000 over 7 years only to end up selling my car for food, living in a tent in a dusty hot rv camp, my kids told me to f~~~ off. I spent one weekend as a guest of a crappy Illinois county in 2012 with a 20 yo childmolester/drug dealer for a roommate. asshole kept moaning about missing his 16 y o gf he wanted to sex up. I had a 15 y o and a 11 y o at the time. I was held in contempt of court for not finding a job fast enough. un f~~~ing believable. last run in with the law I ever had was a speeding ticket in 1987.

I was court ordered to have a job on a monday, court was on a Friday, I had a job on Wednesday. no job on Monday, baliff take the defendant into custody. I fell to the floor fainted from shock.
I was stripsearched, bungus inspected and issued green scrubs three sizes too big and foam flipflops two sizes too small. puked on just before picture taken by a drunken meth head. every teaching job I apply for gets this report and picture. thanks c~~~ exwife and c~~~ judge. you put me in the hole for not having a job fast enough by two f~~~ing days, and you make it way harder for me to find a job later in my career field. c~~~ judge.

I had a very combative 7 years. I moved 2 states away and now have peace. I pay $650 a month for peace. extortion ends may 7 2020. today is 9/17/2016.

good luck if you are at one month to go before yer marriage implodes. prepare well. do not be this idiot.

sorry for the long post. if I save one poor f~~~’s life, it’s worth it.

[Chaff/FlareParticipant 3235]

Holy s~~~.

Good job staying alive bro.

When you find yourself in the majority, it's time to reflect.

[Anonymous 43]

all this s~~~ while going to college getting a teaching certificate. woot I am made out of awesome!!!!!!

but to be fair, I had lots of help along the way.

[Anonymous 3]

Holy s~~~, that was hard to survive at all.

Anonymous wrote:

she will get your house,

Why own a house? She gets the house, you pay the mortgage. Of course, why marry at all?

Anonymous wrote:

you need 6 months living expenses minimum. cash.

And it should be well hidden. Not even your family and close friends should know about it, who knows if there is a traitor? No one should know it. Probably in a close-able box under some personal belongings in the workplace? (If you can trust it, that they like your work and wont fire you, of course.)

Anonymous wrote:

at least an hour away from your old home

Extra time spent driving and extra miles in your car will attract attention. My mother was used to regularly read the odometer on the car (it was an analog one, possible to read when the engine is off.) And it was clear when he drove too much compared to commuting here and there mostly in a city as big as 7 miles in diameter. And how do you go an hour of drive, if you don’t have a car anymore (it’s taken by police) and no cash for a bus/train ride? Phone a friend (if you have one?) Walk for a half day?

Another stuff, I might suggest (without being a lawyer or having been through it) that one might need to get some insurance as a preparation, too. There are insurances for health, unemployment, and a lot of things.

[Anonymous 43]

dp that’s what the extra car is for…yer car is impounded, but you have a secret set of wheels…

[FermatParticipant 3478]

I’ll say it again. HOLY S~~~. This woman made you go through all of this? Inhumanity is not enough to describe this kind of torment. What the hell was she doing while you were living like this? Christ.

I have discovered a truly remarkable list of reasons why women are not necessary for a happy life, but alas this margin is too small to contain it.

[OldBillParticipant]

Listen to this man, brothers. He has been through the fires of hell. Everything he’s sharing with you he learned at the cost of his own blood.

In fact, his original post in this thread should be saved and the thread as a whole moved to the Top Gun forum.

Do not date. Do not impregnate. Do not co-habitate. Above all, do not marry. Reclaim and never again surrender your personal sovereignty.

[Nathan R. JessepParticipant 1102]

“I was court ordered to have a job on a monday,”

How is this possible?

[Nathan R. JessepParticipant 1102]

” the journal saved my ass 9 times. the c~~~ damaged her own property, car and her body 9 times to get me arrested for random bulls~~~. lol.”

9 f~~~ing times? What a nightmare, congrats on finally getting out.

I think your other piece of advice should be get out immediately if she falsely accuses you of something. IMMEDIATELY.

[Anonymous 43]

col Jessup I was in college in teacher training. college strongly suggested not having a job during student teaching. I reported to a school an hour away every morning at 6:30. working backwards, I need to be up at 4:30, s~~~ shower and shave by 5:30. hmmm 5:30 traffic where I lived could be dicey, better to leave at 5am. so then, up at 4 am be there at 6:30, and teach until 3pm…you think my day is done? lol. after the kids go home, I am reading what the kids are going to do, do the homework they are going to do all day, then write up scripted lesson plans and give them to my cooperating teacher. edit and tweak, make copies for all the activities, arrange everything nice and neat, then grade papers, 25 kids, 7 or 8 papers per kid, at least 150 papers and leave comments on each one. at 1 minute per page, this is 2.5 hours. if I got home after my 1 hr commute home before 9pm, it was a rare treat. what I did for my students was legit teaching, not some simulation, not some theoretical bs.

I also had other online class discussions with my professors and other students. bedtime at 11, to get up at 4am the next day.

where am I going to fit a real job into this? at the time of the order I was in my last semester of school, 18 weeks of this hell? meanwhile the ex c~~~ has my b~~~~ in a wringer.
I graduate in January, that’s when I am trying to find a job for the following august. oh, ex c~~~ that year was making only $150,000 a year, and I am in an unpaid apprenticeship.

I was given 21 days to find a job in the s~~~tiest economy ever, in a college town in the middle of a semester. a college town an hour away from any major retail, factories or non farm service companies. that Monday came and went, and I got a job on Wednesday. court was that Friday. I thought I beat the rap…got a job before the court date. easy sledding, right…no judge c~~~ drops the hammer on me and I fell to the floor. handcuffed and stuffed in the back of a windowless van with drug dealers, real rapists, murderers, child molesters, con artists.

I am fluent in 3 languages, I have 4 college degrees, I designed and built model aircraft, make stained glass windows, build musical instruments, make furniture, designed and built a timber frame house and here I am handcuffed to some methhead driven to a holding facility because I couldn’t find a weekend job in a town of 5000 people. this college town had 3 traffic lights for f~~~ sake.

the job? washing cars for a Sunset motors kind of car dealership, working the court ordered 20 hours a week on the weekend for the court ordered $8.25 an hour. I had to pay the c~~~ $35 a week, work 20 hrs at $8.25. at age 43. I made $165 a week washing driven out hoopties, former rental cars sold to college kids, most cars sold for less then $3500.
the weekends I had my kids, the three of us washed cars together. every car got washed 6 times over the weekend. f~~~. those cars were spotless, washed, claybarred, buffed and polished. no 2003 Malibu looked as good from the factory as the crate in this old gas station turned carlot. I made grand ams look like Ferraris and Hyundais look like deusenburgs. while going to school, running on 5 hrs of sleep, a poptart and mt dew for breakfast and whatever the cafeteria was slinging for lunch. pbj for dinner. I worked this job for a year, until I earned my cert and found a teaching job, 2 states away.

all because the c~~~ woke up one morning and said im not happy, get out. she had chad thunderc~~~, 2 houses, three cars and a firmly established career. I had s~~~.

[Anonymous 3]

Anonymous wrote:

that’s what the extra car is for

An extra car then costs money, to keep and to pay its taxes. Even if its at someone else’s name, you pay that. That’t a significant minus in your money.(here, half of a salary can easily go to car payment, one car is a luxury, not to mention two.) And, workplaces typically pay by bank transfer (and some are required to do so), so if you have a joint account (big mistake) you get caught.

So, let’s say, one needs to repetitively borrow a car, or rent one for that ride.
And what happens, if you get a speeding ticket or something like that, while in that other car? this things may arrive by mail, that one’s wife can open, or see the label on it.
And then, there is the extra apartment. An apartment is very expensive in an overpopulated world. Maybe half of a salary, but very much depends on the location. So that extra apartment needs to be in a “behind the back of god” place to be cheap. And, what if the landlord calls your phone, while you are at home? Or you need to have a second phone, that you keep somewhere else, for example at workplace, switched off most of the time?
And what is someone does not have a driver’s licence or the extra car? Then go by bus or train, plus maybe a bicycle. What if you meet someone / someone sees you, who knows your wife and can gossip, that you took the train to somewhere.

So, there are a lot of pitfalls in this, a little detail can derail the whole plan. But definitely a set of good ideas, anyway.

[Anonymous 43]

Amigo, you aren’t getting this…

and I’m not going to explain it all to you.

Either prepare ahead of time and f~~~ the consequences and expense of having a parallel life in place when the c~~~ kicks you in the jimmies, or get caught like I did, with a blue tshirt, size xl fruit of the loom undies, tan shorts, a left sandal and a right sandal, and a box full of paper, and my brother, walking down the road into a rainy summer sunset and an uncertain future. Oh and I had my wedding ring on, too. lol.

heheh the wedding ring…Tied to a couple helium balloons and released from a beach in Florida woot! watching that gold ring fly off into the stratosphere was so satisfying.

And before double penetration I mean darth peter asks, the ring cost $50 at failmart, and yes, some dolphin probably choked on the balloons and died a horrible death, waaaaaaa. No a pawn shop would have given me $3 for the f~~~er. probably give me $5 for the dead dolphin.

[TwistParticipant]

May,

Your story should be required reading by all boys/men. One of the most important life lessons they will ever get.

This hits home to me, I didn’t get many of the worst experiences, but I did have the life I had worked 25 years for stolen from me. A fortune, my children, my sanity. And because she decided her future lay in licking another woman’s pussy.

We can write and read all the stories about “don’t get married”, because they are crazy, they are misery, the system is crooked, etc. But those are generalities – your story is visceral, and every man would do well to picture those very things happening to them.

And anyone who would consider marriage after that mental exercise is just plain nuts…

Thank you for writing this. It hurt me to read it, I imagine it hurt you a lot more to write it.

[Masculine_ManParticipant 2735]

I also agree, this story should be told to every man the day before their wedding. It needs to be repeated before he takes those vows. Give him every opportunity to not do marriage.

If it costs you your peace of mind, then it is too expensive.

[Author]

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