This topic contains 17 replies, has 13 voices, and was last updated by 
John Woods 13 3 years, 1 month ago.
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They want me to start a new position at work where I’ll be sorting physical product and doing other things. The details of the position don’t really matter, because the final result would be the same no matter where I went or what I was doing. And that is the fact that I would absolute smash the position, do an amazing job that 95% of my coworkers can’t come close to (or simply don’t care enough to), and never get the credit or respect I deserve for it. Its been the same since my very first job as a teenager when I would do 90% of the work, meticulously clean and sort things, and pay attention to the tiniest of details even at minimum wage. I never got respect, credit, raises, or promotions. In fact, despite all that the management would’ve gladly replaced me with a “lesser” worker, and in some cases over the years, they even have.
I’ve always had a theory that I make management and co-workers feel threatened in certain ways. Maybe because they know they can’t match me or my work ethic. Crabs in a bucket mentality perhaps. Or maybe some sort of jealousy, I’m not quite sure. I can tell you that there have been plots and attempts to get me fired in the past by jealous and lying co-workers. All I do is go to work, say my hi-byes, and stick to myself and do my work to the best of my ability. I don’t gossip or give anyone reasons to dislike me, but as MGTOW know, sometimes sticking to yourself can raise suspicions and draw unwanted attention. In any case, this has been the story of all my jobs throughout my life and I’m getting fed up with it. If i switch to the new position, I’m convinced the same s~~~ will happen again. I will carry all the work, figure out new, innovative, and more efficient ways to do the work, and be a generally “better” worker than almost all of my co-workers. I don’t even want the new position and I’m probably going to turn it down. The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results.
I’m tired of working for/with incompetent, jealous, irresponsible, careless, and generally stupid losers. These are the people that boss ME around? I always found it astonishing how people with these traits actually have authority over me in managerial positions. How did they even get there to begin with? They are no different from the co-workers themselves. Its time to be my own boss but I just don’t know where to begin or what to start. I’m good with my hands (cleaning, building, organizing) and I’m very creative. I’m a strong introvert. I recently started cooking as a hobby and taking pictures of some of my meals. My friends don’t believe me when I tell them I made it, and they think my dishes are store bought. They flip their s~~~ when they taste some of the stuff I make. I can make a cracking beef wellington and I’m not even from the f~~~ing UK. This year I made myself a peanut butter truffle dark chocolate birthday cake and it was the best cake I ever had. Perhaps some sort of packaged baked goods business? Cleaning business? I had a custom apparel design business when I was younger and it was generally well received by most people (I sold quite a bit), but my mother discouraged me and told me “to get a real job”. I don’t have the passion to re-start it, and that was “my baby” so in a weird way I’d rather just let it rest in peace. Aside from that, I’m in a different place now and would rather do something else.
Suggestions please? Nothing is off limits. I’m not trying to come off as elitist, but I have a lot of self confidence and I know that as long as I find personal enjoyment in something and there is a genuine passion, I can succeed at it, similar to my new cooking hobby. The fact that I don’t do something on my own terms, and “work” for other people is one of the leading factors of my depression. It hurts me everyday to waste any talents that I have just to go do menial work for some unappreciative people. Its the same story with every job, and I can switch jobs 10000 times and am certain I’ll always feel this way. I don’t even care about money really, that’s secondary. I just want to go through life not feeling like I’m not living up to my potential.
Cleaning business?
There’s money to be made in the cleaning bus., and you can start part-time while keeping your full time job until you pick up enough customers to go full time. Also, the initial business investment is minimal. If you have the time, ambition, and desire, It’s worth a try !!
In a World of Justin Beibers Be a Johnny Cash
Why do ineffeicient people get promoted to management above you?
It’s not What you Know, It’s Who you know.
Being social at work can be a good strategy to win allies and get noticed for your achievments.
The trick is to be sociable, but not give any personal details or controversial opinions away to people who may use this against you.
Or alternatively, as a guy you can kiss Ass all day, or as a woman you can suck c~~~ all night.
I have personally seen these strategies employed by previous colleagues.
I think your idea to work for yourself is a good one and I would go with that.
My 2 cents
It's Time to get Wise
The phenomena you have encountered is really pretty common. Most middle managers are incompetent boobs who owe their “status” to their ability to kiss up. You can google it. Its called the kiss up/kick/down style of management.
These managers know when a subordinate has superior skill, knowledge or ability. And because they know they are incompetent they are insecure and must eliminate threats to their positions. Further they actually resent their own constant ass-kissing and therefore fell entitled to oblige subordinates to replicate this behavior. Its a vicious cycle.
My advice: stay off their radar, marshal your resources and strike out on your own. Even if you fail can it really be worse than compulsory groveling to an exalted imbecile? (When this sort of thing happened to me I found that even when I did an outstanding job the supervisor or department head took the credit for it with the higher ups. There really is no way out but the door.)
I’ve always had a theory that I make management and co-workers feel threatened in certain ways. Maybe because they know they can’t match me or my work ethic. Crabs in a bucket mentality perhaps. Or maybe some sort of jealousy, I’m not quite sure.
Jealousy.
^ Understand completely. Every word like I wrote it myself. Including the cooking part. I once cooked dinner (fish & asparagus tips) for a woman who flatly refused to believe that I cooked it. So I told her HOW it was done. I should have just told her to shut up and eat. There was nothing to it!
When someone thinks it’s so impossible that you can cook a meal like the wind blows, it doesn’t say anything about you YOU….. it says everything about them.
Suggestions please? Nothing is off limits. I’m not trying to come off as elitist, but I have a lot of self confidence
The work ethic and blowing through / solving problems part is not in your imagination. And it’s not “elitist”. A self-assured man make others intensely uncomfortable. They are all expecting Homer Simpson. I’m serious. And when your’e not Homer Simpson, their brains fry – especially when you’re better at their jobs than they are.
It’s too often mistaken for a “huge ego” but when a man is not Everybody-Loves-but-nobody-respects-Raymond, anything non-self-deprecating is misunderstood as “arrogance”.
Taking orders from management who’s less competent than you was recently talked about here, and I went on about it mentioning personal experience. How the hell can someone tell you to best do something when they can’t do it themselves?
But THAT’S WHY THEY ARE WHERE THEY ARE and YOU ARE WHERE YOU ARE.
They KNOW you you should be promoted, but when you’re so good, they can’t replace you. They need you where you are. Against all logic, you actually end up pigeon-holing yourself. And when you reach a plateau, it’s time to go.
This is not your fault. Logic dictates working harder and better and outshining others should propel you forward. But we don’t live in that kind of a world. The “better politician” is given the management spot, and Spock the science officer won’t be Captain…. because they think he’s best as science officer.
The phenomena you have encountered is really pretty common
You betcha.
Not being a Homer Simpson freaks people out.
they are insecure and must eliminate threats to their positions
I’m nodding. It’s so tangible.
If you keep doing what you've always done... you're gonna keep getting what you always got.I’m pleasantly surprised that you all seem to agree and even understand me. Not only that but you furthered my knowledge on the subject. It seems like MGTOW are the exact type of men to find themselves in these positions, so I shouldn’t be too surprised since we were probably all there at one point. It all makes perfect sense about management feeling threatened by men like us, therefore keeping us pigeon-holed in our s~~~ty positions. I refuse to suck c~~~/kiss ass even tho it may be to my own detriment, its just not something in my blood.
So what does this mean for me? Is starting a business the absolute best way to go? Where, what, and How?
Sidenote to Keymaster. I showed a bitch a picture of my birthday cake and she refused to believe I made it entirely from scratch. It says a lot about her more than it does about me. If she was that impressed, then chances are her attempt at a cake would be f~~~ing disastrous.
Aint we al.
http://www.leavemeansleave.eu
I refuse to suck c~~~/kiss ass even tho it may be to my own detriment, its just not something in my blood.
Again. You’re directly quoting my own thoughts.
I admit I’m a terrible politician and have no interest.Your work should speak for itself.
This is why I got terrible marks at History and English. The essays were too much open for critiquing writing style, opinion, political views, phrasing, interpretation , class participation, licking the teacher’s butthole etc.
But I excelled in Math, and Science because it’s either RIGHT – or it’s WRONG.
2 + 2 can never equal 5. So if a teacher “doesn’t like me”, she still can’t f~~~ing fail me. She MUST give me an A if it’s right. You don’t need to be a politician in math and science, because the work speaks for itself.That translates to the workplace perfectly.
( Does this also explain why women generally avoid STEM? )
Sidenote to Keymaster. I showed a bitch a picture of my birthday cake and she refused to believe I made it entirely from scratch. It says a lot about her more than it does about me. If she was that impressed, then chances are her attempt at a cake would be f~~~ing disastrous.
Exactly right.
LUKE: “I don’t believe it!”
YODA: “That….. is why you fail.”
Disbelief in your ability is intended to come off as a “compliment”, but it’s a masquerade for an insult, because they can’t/won’t/aren’t even willing to put the time in to try. So they make a cheap dig at YOU.
How many times have you heard someone say “I’m a terrible cook. I use my oven for storage. lol”. They are content to accept that they suck at it, and there is not even any willingness to try and learn. How the f~~~ is it possible to be a “terrible cook”? What do they do? Make soup out of Bleach? It’s a cop out and they are just plain LAZY.
“LAZY” is more common explanation than anyone would care to admit.
I have even heard the “you’re so talented in the kitchen” trick.
It’s not “talent” that magically fell from the sky.
It’s WORK and the result of making an effort.If you keep doing what you've always done... you're gonna keep getting what you always got.If it was easy, everyone would succeed. It’s not where you start out that matters, it’s where you end up.
I build to build.
I create to create.
I invent to invent.
It takes effort. Lots of effort. I have never succeeded with the support of anyone.In fact, most times, I succeed despite them.
I am 50 some years old. It took 30 plus years of effort to get into a position where I could be an agent of change.
I have seen most people fall by the wayside. Some committed suicide, some died of cancer, some let their skill set dwindle and couldn’t recover when downsized.
In life, success is not guaranteed. In fact, it is not even a probable.
Learn more, do more, be more. Let the wind blow around your face. Push into it as hard as possible for no one gives a s~~~ about you but you.
Peace brothers
If this is happening as an isolated event in one organization it may be a management issue. If it keeps happening I would consider what you might be doing to create an environment where they don’t want to promote you. Nothing wrong with admitting you might be holding yourself back without knowing it and seek some advice.
If you rescue a damsel in distress, all you will get is a distressed damsel.
Push into it as hard as possible for no one gives a s~~~ about you but you.
That quote speaks so much truth. In the end, thank god that I am passionate to learn things that can be of use to me, because in the end, it is really rare that you are going to come across people who will give you free good advice when you are at your low point in life, because that is just the way it is. You will only really attract people who might really help you by the way is usually when you really don’t even need help being guided in life anymore, because by then, you will become successful, and successful people attract lots other types of successful people, which is the reason why it is like that.
"Question everything" - Albert Einstein
MGTOW is a very similar situation. You didn’t start out with the understanding. It took effort. And maybe years of failure. You didn’t end up successful in your mgtow knowledge by accident. It took mental effort.
Work success is similar plus some luck of a champion superior but you still have to put in the years of effort.
As a MGTOW I am surrounded by morons. Same thing in our work life.
A friend of mine summed it up this way. He says that the universe reflects a given amount of intelligence. This can be measured by the light reflection from the stars. The moronic quotient is measured by the darkness that isn’t reflected. You think that this reflects lots of intelligence but if you pushed all of the stars together and saw how much darkness there is you’d be amazed. My friend says that we are the problem. We reflect to much star light. Every star light is surrounded by morons. But, no one notices.
Peace brothers
Yeah, it’s like that at my work too. The people running the place work everyone to death. If I wanted to I’m sure I could dump that job and get another one for the same money and less work. A number of people have actually quit and left due to either being overworked, drastic cuts to their hours, or concluding that they would be better off somewhere else.
Logic dictates working harder and better and outshining others should propel you forward. But we don’t live in that kind of a world.
Too true. I’m so glad I learned this so early in life.
We’re taught to be good, to be diligent, that it was the “right” thing to do, that those are the people who get ahead. But no. There is no justice, and wishing that there were won’t make it so.
". . . elle, suivant l’usage des femmes et des chats qui ne viennent pas quand on les appelle et qui viennent quand on ne les appelle pas, s’arrêta devant moi et m’adressa la parole"—Prosper Mérimée
Sorry to say OP, but you’re paid what you’re worth. If you think you’re worth more, then you’ve got to BE worth more to your company. If you really want FAIR compensation for your time and effort, the only way to get it is to become self employed. The purpose of the companies you work for is to use your labor to create high profits for them, and give you peanuts in exchange (in other words, pay you as little as you’re willing to take in order to stay).
How many times have you heard someone say “I’m a terrible cook. I use my oven for storage. lol”. They are content to accept that they suck at it, and there is not even any willingness to try and learn. How the f~~~ is it possible to be a “terrible cook”? What do they do? Make soup out of Bleach? It’s a cop out and they are just plain LAZY.
Sorry, but I have to disagree on that point at least when it comes to me. I’m f~~~ing terrible at cooking. I can’t juggle all that crap, and everything I make ends up tasting like s~~~ and cold by the time it reaches the table. My father was an excellent cook and my mother a terrible one. I’m afraid it’s genetic and I cook like my mother.
My father did everything he could to try and teach me, but he finally after many years put his hand on my shoulder and said “Son, I’m sorry to say you’re never going to be a good cook. I think you should stick to microwaving toast.”
I can’t STAND it when people tell me I can’t do something. So I spent YEARS trying to learn. I’m better now, but if you were to try some of my cooking you’d probably have a hard time believing that I was once even WORSE than I currently am. I just don’t understand why EVERYTHING I make ends up tasting like S~~~. I don’t even like my peanut butter sandwiches (It’s always either too much peanut butter or not enough). Seriously. It’s f~~~ing pathetic.
Sorry to say OP, but you’re paid what you’re worth. If you think you’re worth more, then you’ve got to BE worth more to your company.
Agree in principal … but you can BE worth more, and not be receiving it. It just takes a great person they are not expecting to lose to *decide* he’s worth more, hand in his notice, and very often he will get offered more – after the fact.
“Dammit, we thought he was stupid and desperate.
OK how much will it take….”It has happened to me. And it p~~~ed me off that I got it late. In one case I already accepted another offer. They were shocked that I would go somewhere new.
It’s like a woman who won’t put out and is “too tired”…. and when she finds a text from another chick on your phone, she will suck you so hard your forehead will cave in and the sheets will go up your ass.
I just don’t understand why EVERYTHING I make ends up tasting like S~~~.
I’ve heard that before, but I really don’t get it. I suck at golf. SUCK at it. I will never be good. But really…. it’s because I don’t care. I care about being good at billiards, bowling, darts, skating, tennis, I will feel competition and want to win in all of those.
Except golf. I suck at it, and I don’t give a f~~~.
I don’t understand why I’m bad it either.
Except that I don’t care.if you were to try some of my cooking you’d probably have a hard time believing that I was once even WORSE than I currently am. I just don’t understand why EVERYTHING I make ends up tasting like S~~~. I don’t even like my peanut butter sandwiches (It’s always either too much peanut butter or not enough). Seriously. It’s f~~~ing pathetic.
I don’t usually LMAO…… but “LMAO”.
If you keep doing what you've always done... you're gonna keep getting what you always got.Too true. I’m so glad I learned this so early in life. We’re taught to be good, to be diligent, that it was the “right” thing to do, that those are the people who get ahead. But no. There is no justice.
Well if you ever find out WHY it’s that way (and you can prove it), be sure to let me know. It’s one thing to accept it and understand that’s the way thing are…. but it’s another to beat it and own that s~~~.
Lets compare notes again next year.
If you keep doing what you've always done... you're gonna keep getting what you always got.Yes, yes and yes. You are not the only one. I always had great work ethic and always did my job well and beyond what was required. All I ever got from it was incompetent bosses feeling threathened and incompetent colleagues trying to undermine my work because it was putting them in a bad light. Of my many jobs I had in my life, more than a dozen for sure, I only had one boss actually acknowledge my work at its true value. Man, I could write about this for hours, but suffice to say that it is the norm rather than the exception. Hard working people will be abused and kept down, both by their bosses and their colleagues.
So, unless you get a Keymaster type as your boss (which I would love btw) your only option is to open your own business/operation. This is what I am preparing to do right now also. I will start it part time alongside my day job and go at it full time when it takes off.
Good luck!The answer is NO. “I could but I won’t”. Memini murum!
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