S T U C K –

[CombatRollParticipant 2594]

I’ve been to 3 lawyer appointments in the last 8 months. My wife (who used to stay home) now has a job where she travels – leaving me stuck at home as the breadwinner and taking care of my 12yr old and things around the house.

WTF – she has become so c~~~y lately. She spends all of her money on clothes/botox/nails/etc. She is a T Total B1tch to me 24/7. I provide the home/her expensive SUV and she prances around like she is CEO of a company and she earns $45k less than I do. Her job entertains a lot – c~~~tails, outings – I swear they do stupid s~~~ constantly – ball games/concerts/ and I’m earning the bread, paying for everything and holding down the fort at home.

So, we brawl constantly about the above. She is c~~~y and belligerent and has a “F-it” attitude. I thought she might be stepping out, so I hacked her phone and put a VAR in her car for months. All I heard was her bashing me and saying how I didn’t like how she traveled and stayed out late and how I could “deal with it”.

So due to this and her 99 other flaws (Lying, taking money out of savings, being a cold b1tch, etc) I decided to leave her.

I sent her an email (b/c we can’t talk without brawling) that we needed to split and do so amicably for the kids.

Here is the crux: She cannot stay in the house and pay for everything. My lawyer said that b/c she makes good money (I never see any of it) I would probably only have to pay the mortgage and she would have to assume all of the other bills. Great – works for me.
or
She can move out and I can stay in the house, which I suggested.

Now – all of a sudden she is acting sugary sweet to me. I guess b/c she knows the meal ticket is ready to split she feels threatened that her way of life will be affected.

She is canceling travel, suggesting we do things together (we never do anything except have a drink on the patio and fight) and wants to go to counseling.

Seriously – I was 100% committed to getting out of this and now she is stalling me.

I wish she would go back to being a bitch so I could just end it, one way or the other.

I’m calling the lawyer today and seeing what she says about these new developments. Chances are – the leopard cannot change its spots and the b1tch will come back out in a few days.

I just want OUT and want to keep as much as my assets as possible.

Anyone else experience Jeckle and Hyde from their Ex like this?

[AwakenedParticipant 35202]

She’s trying to protect her Wallet, and her standard of living.

She’s playing nice to keep you at home paying the bills and picking up the pieces so she can continue doing what She wants.

At least, that’s what it looks like to me.

If ya want to go and can afford to go, then go.

If ya want to stay, then stay and play HER game.

In a World of Justin Beibers Be a Johnny Cash

[JVBParticipant]

Reading that it seems you can see it for what it is bro. Don’t buckle, follow through and get rid of the bitch. I also get a scene that she’s probably skirting around on you. Take your freedom and sovereignty back bro. Good luck.

Peace is > piece.

[Two Time WinnerParticipant 1090]

Read your own post man. When did she change from c~~~y and belligerent to being sugary sweet? When you told her that the gravy train was leaving the station. You have to make your own mind up but this women is playing you for a fool. Cancel your plans to leave and it will back to c~~~y and belligerent in a few weeks.

TTW

I ain't got a wife to spend my money, I have to do that all by myself.

[PuniShredderParticipant 2268]

Lolololol!!!! That’s Rich!!

By all means she has obviously changed!!! Stay with her!!!!!

Be professional be polite but always have a plan to kill everyone you meet.

[NeroParticipant 1466]

Yes, I faced the same situation as you. Read my posts from the past. You will find some excellent information I gather. See if you find any parallels to your situation. I got out, and I’m thankful I did. We men STAY due to what I’ve come to know as the FOG (Fear, Obligation, and Guilt). You have to stay clear of the fog and stay focused on what brought you to the brink. No, I do not believe it will change long-term. Short-term? Of course. Any HO can manipulate a situation short term without expending too much energy. Best believe she has been sending out her imperial probe droids looking for a new WALLET to inhabit.

[joetechParticipant]

She’s playing you until she gets her forces aligned. Run Luke, run!

"Don't follow in my footsteps...I stepped in something."

[NoMoreParticipant 1233]

Get out. A woman who has hinted at leaving is already 2 steps ahead of you. Get a good lawyer ASAP and file. As the one to file, you are the plaintiff, which means you get to go first and last if comes to court. You get to set the initial tone of the proceedings and she has to respond.

Record every interaction with her, always. You don’t want to be blind sided with a domestic abuse charge. You also want to have evidence of her verbally abusing you in front of the kids or being nefarious.

Protecting yourself is by behaving as the good actor. You are spending time with your child, making sure they are cared for, the bills are getting paid. It’s expensive at times and cumbersome, but you are demonstrating that you can act as a responsible adult and take care of what needs to be taken care of.

A co-worker recently told me, "If you want to see who someone really is, divorce them." I have found out how true this is. When your wife drops the façade of being the caring partner, you will witness all of the greed, hate, and spite that she has masked. It is truly breathtaking!

[AttonParticipant]

joetech wrote:

She’s playing you until she gets her forces aligned. Run Luke, run!

Then get in a rocket ship.

A MGTOW is a man who is not a woman's bitch!

[NerdTunnelerParticipant]

LOL…She is is planning on monkey branching but it hasnt panned out yet so she settled for you…She disrespected you and wanted to go her own way…Let her be accountable for her actions…

I stand with feet apart and let my balls hang free...Manginas dont have balls...See how they stand and sit at the whim of their masters...

[GrumpyParticipant]

Put her on the curb with the rest of the trash.
Make sure all your ducks (evidence) are in a row.
Ensure you have irrefutable proof of being the primary care giver as well.
Prepare for a wild ride. it gets rougher the more she tries to play the role of the victim

There was a time in my life when I gave a fuck. Now you have to pay ME for it

[narwhalParticipant]

At this point, you do not need to be concerned for her as she has clearly demonstrated she is not concerned for you. Therefore there is no reason to feel guilty about whatever decision to make.

I would make a list of behaviors and circumstances that need to change in order for you to trust and or love her again. You can includes events that need to happen or how long these changes need to take place before you can feel like there is clean slate.

It could be like:
– Sell SUV
– Quit her job
– Do not lie to me for 1 year straight
– Do not argue with me for 1 year straight

When I did this, I figured it was about 4 years before I could consider seeing my ex again. Read your list whenever your emotions start kicking in, so you can rely on logic.

And remember, she has many reasons to be nice to you that have nothing to do with how she feels about you.
– She doesn’t want to appear to be the bad guy to the 12 yr old.
– She is afraid she won’t get custody due to her travel schedule.
– She is trying to make sure she gets a favorable settlement from you.
– She wants to look like the victim to her friends and family.
– She believes a counselor will side with her, and then she can go back to the way it was.
– She wants to buy time to monkey branch.

Ok. Then do it.

[CombatRollParticipant 2594]

Great comments. I’ve been keeping calm and not letting any guilt BS penetrate my armor. She tried this BS today. Nada.

I’ve been Super Dad and documented the hell out of it. She knows she is in a position of weakness and is trying to kiss up. A leopard doesn’t change its spots and the ugliness will show its head again in a matter of days.

I’m in the trenches, boys. Battle of Jedi Mind Tricks. Sleeping with the enemy. Called the shark yesterday and we had a discussion on strategy. She gave me sound advice.

[KeymasterKeymaster]

CombatRoll wrote:

Now – all of a sudden she is acting sugary sweet to me.

Predictable.

CombatRoll wrote:

Anyone else experience Jeckle and Hyde from their Ex like this?

When I was 24, I dated my first and last “total bitch”, the kind that would wake up to ruin a day. It was truly like Taming of the Shrew (if you know the Shakespeare tale). The most surprising thing was what kind of putty she was in my hands when I became a RELENTLESS DICK in order to make sure she didn’t get away with any crap. Sometimes I even surprised myself how far I had to dial it up.

pouts / complains / bitches / treats people like s~~~

Most guys will ask “what’s wrong?” like her problem is his to fix. I might even say it’s normal – for the sake of keeping the peace. Some will even be nicer to her, try to appease her, take her out, buy her flowers etc. But what happens when you run to the crib every time a baby cries? You inadvertently train it to be an even bigger cry-baby.

So instead of asking “what’s wrong?” I would ask “Why are you behaving like a complete bitch?” and call her out on everything – directly – and often in front of other people.

All of a sudden, she was saccharin sweet.
But it’s exhausting, and not worth it.

It was all just one “s~~~ test” after another. I handled it, but got out because I’m not interested in Taming a Shrew. Nobody could take her in large doses.

CombatRoll wrote:

Seriously – I was 100% committed to getting out of this and now she is stalling me. I wish she would go back to being a bitch so I could just end it, one way or the other.

Why wait for that? Simply “not being a bitch” is not a reason to stay or be with her. She’s going to have to be a lovely person to be around. That’s more effort than just not being bitch. Increase your minimum requirements and expectations from her.

Is staying together strictly a business deal and a bottom line for her? Is she nicer to you simply because you put a roof over her head? Women will stay in a bad relationship as long as it pays.

CombatRoll wrote:

Now – all of a sudden she is acting sugary sweet to me. I guess b/c she knows the meal ticket is ready to split she feels threatened that her way of life will be affected.

Do you want her in your life for that reason? Is it OK to be in a relationship where a woman treats you better simply because “it’s a better deal” than being on her own?

If you keep doing what you've always done... you're gonna keep getting what you always got.

[Anonymous 12]

Seriously – I was 100% committed to getting out of this and now she is stalling me.

Wrong.
She is loading the gun that she will use to knock you down.
What you see is nothing but deception, masquerade.

[CombatRollParticipant 2594]

Update: I knew she couldn’t be sweet for more than 3 days.

By all standards, this woman is selfish and spoiled beyond belief.

I don’t know how I can get out of this with my shirt on my back. Before I thought I could navigate this with less than colossal financial ruin. Now, I’m not so sure.

What I do know is waiting is only going to make it worse and more painful.

[The DealParticipant 236]

narwhal wrote:

Quit her job

Don’t get her to do that! Then when she leaves you, she’ll for sure get the kid and all your money. You may be in a good position to get primary custody since she’s gone a lot. Document your time with the kid and her trips and make a plan with your lawyer. If you do decide to leave her, don’t let her know what you’re up to — at all.

[AstroParticipant 2045]

Hmmm, reminds me a bit of my 1st wife. She was a total train wreck and bitch but when she seen when I was about to pop, she would go sweet. I made an entire thread about her and didn’t say half the story. It was so bad that Old Sage thinks I made it up. I divorced her and that gave me an edge. Don’t wait for the papers to be served to you and that may be why she tried to put on a mask in the first place. No one likes financial ruin (how well I know) but what is piece of mind worth? I for one would rather be a homeless bum at peace than a billionaire living in Biltmore with a wife making it a living hell. Money is far easier to replace than sanity. I agree with my brothers that she may also be riding the carousel and looking for a new fool. Hey, I hope I am dead wrong but I don’t think I am.

[CombatRollParticipant 2594]

The Deal wrote:

narwhal wrote:

Quit her job

Don’t get her to do that! Then when she leaves you, she’ll for sure get the kid and all your money. You may be in a good position to get primary custody since she’s gone a lot. Document your time with the kid and her trips and make a plan with your lawyer. If you do decide to leave her, don’t let her know what you’re up to — at all.

Oh, Hell NO- She isn’t quitting that job. That is part of my ticket out. She makes good money – so the court will see she can sustain herself.

She isn’t riding the carousel or looking to Monkey Branch. I can’t go into it all, but I’ve hacked/snooped/VAR/and more. No Chad. If there was, that would help my cause.

She is just an egotistical spoiled bitch. Plain and simple. Selfish beyond belief. The world revolves around HER. When she can get her nails done, massages, hair, clothes and she prances around like she is CEO of Exxon Mobile. I pay all the bills and her money goes to HER. I ask for help and get, “I just don’t have it”. Then off she goes without a care in the world.

[Author]

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