Home › Forums › MGTOW Central › Regarding the concept of "Slut Shaming"
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MKB 4 years, 8 months ago.
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I’ve been reading about this topic lately, and the whole thing is a bit mystifying.
I’m mainly libertarian about most issues, as I believe that every adult citizen has the right to make his or her own choices – as long as they follow the law and don’t violate the rights of others. To the best of my knowledge, there is no actual law against promiscuity for either gender, as long as it’s consenting adults, etc. Religious law may differ, of course, although I would also consider it to be a matter of personal choice to subject oneself to religious law.
Feminists have stated in no uncertain terms that they don’t see anything morally wrong with promiscuous behavior in women, and some have even worn the title “slut” as a badge of honor. So, by their own stated principles, they see nothing wrong with being a slut and therefore feel that there’s no shame in it.
I’ve noticed that a commonly used argument is to raise the question of an alleged double standard in that promiscuous men are called “studs” or “players,” while promiscuous women are called “sluts” or “tramps.” I don’t believe this is strictly true though, as promiscuous men can also be denigrated as “horndogs” or “poon hounds” or any other choice term.
Another argument I’ve seen is that the reason for the alleged “double standard” is because it’s far more difficult for a man to be promiscuous, since it requires much more skill (or looks or money), whereas it’s relatively easy for even an unattractive woman to be promiscuous.
Another thing that struck me related to the last argument is that, there is a distinct difference between a woman who is forward and more active in pursuing men for sexual encounters, as opposed to those who tend to be more passive about it and give in easily to the men pursuing them.
Both types may be promiscuous but in different ways, and that more active and forward women are pursuing the object of their desires, yet would probably require more finesse and social skill that “players” often pride themselves on having.
In contrast, the passive ones will wait for men to hit on them, while ultimately giving in to some smooth line when they probably hadn’t even planned anything themselves. That’s one thing I’ve noticed in my own experience; it’s that sluts tend to be very passive, weak-willed, and irresponsible. They’re also the most sensitive and duplicitous when it comes to not wanting others to think that they’re sluts – even though they are. And they’re not ashamed of being sluts, even though they are ashamed.
This leads me to conclude that “slut shaming” is not criticizing women for promiscuity. On the contrary, it seems to be related to criticisms for being passive, weak-willed, and irresponsible – just letting things happen and not taking control of one’s own life. In that sense, there really is no “double standard” here at all.
If men can be criticized and shamed for being weak, then why can’t women? That, to me, is what “slut shaming” boils down to. It’s not about promiscuity, but it’s about spinelessness and a fair bit of hypocrisy.
The real irony is that most of the “slut shaming” that I’ve seen comes far more from women than men. But their idea of a “slut” is one who is the more assertive and decisive “player” type (since they’re the greater threat), whereas they view the passive, fickle, weak, wishy-washy type of slut as being a “victim.”
Anyone who can be shamed by a stranger, really hasn’t taken control of their own life, and has esteem and acceptance issues. I saw some Tumblrite try to defend riots by calling complaints about riots going on as “riot shaming”. Yes, they did that. If you feel shame, either change your behavior or your internal value set.
"I am my own thang. Any questions?" - Davis S Pumpkins.
Anonymous18Another thing that struck me related to the last argument is that, there is a distinct difference between a woman who is forward and more active in pursuing men for sexual encounters, as opposed to those who tend to be more passive about it and give in easily to the men pursuing them.
There is a 3rd kind. The one that carries herself with subtle hints of a sexual prowess. She will say something slutty but would leave enough room to maneuver herself away if you don’t bite. She doesn’t want sex, she wants companionship, all things un-slutty. Yet the c~~~ count is second to none. She is the perpetual ‘dating the wrong type of men’. Dating … even when the dude is too busy to spare any time more than 30 mins, few times a week. ‘He just wants sex, jerk!’. These types are the scary ones.
I think it’s wonderful ☺
I can’t remember who said it but:
First they came for ‘them’ and I said nothing.
Then they came for you and I said nothing.
Now they’ve come for me and nobody said anything.
Something like that. Anyway, this is just feminism eating itself.
It used to be all girls together, burn your bra sisters.
Slowly but surely they are turning on each other. Yes the main focus is us guys … but we’re simply not enough to hate … they need more.
Stay at home moms, mra etc .. it’s lovely 😃
This leads me to conclude that “slut shaming” is not criticizing women for promiscuity. On the contrary, it seems to be related to criticisms for being passive, weak-willed, and irresponsible – just letting things happen and not taking control of one’s own life. In that sense, there really is no “double standard” here at all.
A very well thought out argument. Bravo!
99% of all sluts fall into your defined “passive” category. They just spread their legs to get laid, cry rape if they regret it later, don’t want to be called sluts, and basically don’t want to be judged for being pathetic and irresponsible.I make a personal distinction between “slut” and “sexually experienced female”.
a female who has had some sexual experience is just fine in my book. She should know what she likes, know how to figure out what a man likes, have some skills and not be squeamish about her body or doing things with it.
A slut, on the other hand, isn’t interested in sex so much as she is interested in approval. This kind of female f~~~s around not because she enjoys the pleasure of exploring and being explored by a new partner, but because she wants to be popular and validated.
A guy who f~~~s around because he enjoys having sex with a variety of females would not be a slut because he’s doing it as an objective, not a means to some other end. A female will f~~~ a guy or make out with a chick in a club just to boost her popularity but no guy I’ve ever heard of has had gobs of sex with a lot of females in order to become popular. I don’t think that’s ever happened in the history of mankind… thus men are not sluts.
Anonymous12If I were to put on a white sheet and hood and walk through a black neighborhood I would get beaten because I would be dressed as a KKK member. That way of dressing has a meaning and even if I am not a KKK member I am certainly sending out a message.
If a woman is dressed in skimpy clothing although she may not be a slut or have slutty intentions she is sending out a message all the same. I am not saying she should be raped or deserves that just to be clear. But I do think the idea behind these Anti Slut Shaming rallies is a confused one.
Or is it? There is also a push to de-sexualize female breasts, is the idea to tun everyone asexual? Makes me wonder and I find myself back on the NWO theory of culling the number of humans on the planet with declining birth rates.
Even alpha male athletes will resort to shaming if the can’t intimidate you into submission. It happened to me when as a freshman. I lived in a dorm full of jocks. I was unafraid, which irritated them by itself. I openly defied them, even smart mouthed them on occasion, which angered them. (Don’t try this at home folks. I spent my high school years lifting weights and taking jiu-jitsu lessons)
So, they resorted to shaming. One of them asked if I was a virgin. I allowed that I was not. (I was younger and even more foolish then.) They immediately said I was lying, laughed me down, in general resorted to verbal bullying. They grew quiet when I asked them why they were so interested in my sexual orientation … There was a pause for silence and then the conversation moved to safer ground. (Looking back, I realize I had used verbal jiu-jitsu, and turned their attack against itself.)
Maybe I should have taken a cue from Der Terminator himself:
Society asks MGTOWs: Why are you not making more tax-slaves?
I’m mainly libertarian about most issues, as I believe that every adult citizen has the right to make his or her own choices – as long as they follow the law and don’t violate the rights of others. To the best of my knowledge, there is no actual law against promiscuity for either gender, as long as it’s consenting adults, etc.
I consider myself mainly a libertarian as well…but with some issues I still feel that just because you can do something doesn’t mean you should. People are free to be as slutty as they want, but I think to do that and expect to never be judged for it is stupid. I’m not out publicly shaming sluts or promiscuous behavior, but at the same time I think its in my best interest to not get involved with sluts.
As with most social issues I don’t necessarily agree with…I’m willing to tolerate it, but I don’t have to accept it or celebrate it.
Anonymous12Even alpha male athletes will resort to shaming if the can’t intimidate you into submission. It happened to me when as a freshman. I lived in a dorm full of jocks. I was unafraid, which irritated them by itself. I openly defied them, even smart mouthed them on occasion, which angered them. (Don’t try this at home folks. I spent my high school years lifting weights and taking jiu-jitsu lessons) So, they resorted to shaming. One of them asked if I was a virgin. I allowed that I was not. (I was younger and even more foolish then.) They immediately said I was lying, laughed me down, in general resorted to verbal bullying. They grew quiet when I asked them why they were so interested in my sexual orientation … There was a pause for silence and then the conversation moved to safer ground. (Looking back, I realize I had used verbal jiu-jitsu, and turned their attack against itself.) Maybe I should have taken a cue from Der Terminator himself: <iframe src=”https://www.youtube.com/embed/LUZgPfdkWis?feature=oembed” width=”500″ height=”375″ frameborder=”0″ allowfullscreen=””></iframe>
I used to cop the same s~~~ in high school, my mate and I would hang with the girls a lot as we liked girls and quite often they were the 17 & 18 year olds who had the womanly bodies (we were 15 at the time) anyway the guys would call us gay as they ran off the to the field to chase each other while playing ball.
’m mainly libertarian about most issues, as I believe that every adult citizen has the right to make his or her own choices – as long as they follow the law and don’t violate the rights of others.
I am with you there, right up until some special interest group manages to get the laws changed in order to violate the rights of others. As for “slut shaming”, or any shaming for that matter. It is only a tool to force individuals to conform to a set of standards set by others. The only true qualifier for me is that a person has to present themselves honestly. I can accept that, it is better to know what you are dealing with up front than to get sucker punched later.
There was a time in my life when I gave a fuck. Now you have to pay ME for it
Promiscuity is unhealthy no matter your gender. It’s a fault in sexuality if it’s there. It can be born into you or through life you can acquire it. Either way, it’s unhealthy. You need to pair-bond for sex. That’s how it works. People who pump-and-dump are either messed up or will be messed up.
Our society is accepting bulls~~~ and commercialized ideas. One idea is you can have all the liberal sex you want and everything will be OK. Whether or not you accept religion as accurate or not to reality doesn’t mean much in terms of recognizing that promiscuity causes problems. That’s why the Bible is against it. If the Bible isn’t really inspired by an actually existing god then we have to ask why it’s there. Some say it’s to control sexuality by the powerful and other’s say it’s borrowed from other ancient religions. Both are hogwash in my opinion but if it isn’t to control sexuality, then it’s probably based on observing the problem with promiscuity.
We’re living in interesting times. We’ve thrown out that which makes America strong and instead become like Ancient Rome or Ancient Greece where the child-abuse cycle reigns (yes, I just decided that). We’re giving up on morality and moving to a secular nation. We’re totally changing into something different. I don’t know what will happen next but I’m afraid it won’t be any sort of Utopia.
The most outspoken individuals who slut shame are in fact, women.
Our society is accepting bulls~~~ and commercialized ideas. One idea is you can have all the liberal sex you want and everything will be OK. Whether or not you accept religion as accurate or not to reality doesn’t mean much in terms of recognizing that promiscuity causes problems.
This is what I was trying to get at. Its not my place to tell someone don’t be a whore…go do whatever the hell you want to, but at the same time when you hit the wall and realize overly slutty behavior has f~~~ed your life up don’t expect someone like me to help you fix it. I don’t want you after you are full of stds, have kids, and have the emotional baggage and issues that tend to come along with having a high number of sexual partners.
With that being said…I’m not one of those people expecting to marry a virgin. I’ve had a few girlfriends in the past…if I met a chick that had a few boyfriends that’s cool…but the sluts that over the last 10 years went through a dozen “boyfriends,” rebound guys after some of those boyfriends, and some one night stands in college…no f~~~ing thanks, I want nothing to do with you. I hope you had my fun, because I have my standards.
We should start a dating website called saveahoe.com. If you’re a dude who has enough money to support a woman and her kids, you’re allowed to sign up. If your a woman who’s blown out you can also sign up. Then the algorithm matches the hoe with the simp. The two can then date and get wed and he can pay for her while she does other dudes, because the site also signs her up on other dating websites and a profile for him is generated on dontdatehimgirl.com so that he can’t leave her.
This idea is golden. Why didn’t anybody think of this before?
Anonymous3Promiscuity is unhealthy no matter your gender. It’s a fault in sexuality if it’s there. It can be born into you or through life you can acquire it. Either way, it’s unhealthy. You need to pair-bond for sex. That’s how it works. People who pump-and-dump are either messed up or will be messed up. Our society is accepting bulls~~~ and commercialized ideas. One idea is you can have all the liberal sex you want and everything will be OK. Whether or not you accept religion as accurate or not to reality doesn’t mean much in terms of recognizing that promiscuity causes problems. That’s why the Bible is against it. If the Bible isn’t really inspired by an actually existing god then we have to ask why it’s there. Some say it’s to control sexuality by the powerful and other’s say it’s borrowed from other ancient religions. Both are hogwash in my opinion but if it isn’t to control sexuality, then it’s probably based on observing the problem with promiscuity. We’re living in interesting times. We’ve thrown out that which makes America strong and instead become like Ancient Rome or Ancient Greece where the child-abuse cycle reigns (yes, I just decided that). We’re giving up on morality and moving to a secular nation. We’re totally changing into something different. I don’t know what will happen next but I’m afraid it won’t be any sort of Utopia.
You are completely right.
Also when women don’t shame men, and can even convince stupid men that it’s okay for women to slut around, the silent, good men analyze the situation and realize the women are garbage. You can’t trust a woman to be honest, everyone knows that. But they are open that they aren’t virgins and will laugh at the very idea that women are virgins even at a young age, then laugh at any man that would think that.
Society isn’t so simple, there are moving parts to it. Once things begin to go, the wicked laugh about it and think they are in complete control, but the effects it has aren’t always vocalized and quickly apparent.
We’re beginning to reach a stage where men are withdrawing from society and are protecting themselves, where society has ran out of males to devalue and take advantage of. It’s similar to the business world, where there are no more people to fire and no more profits to be gained because everyone is broke and can’t buy anything.
These systems, and especially women, are more parasites than anything else. They can not exist on their own, they need environments where other people play by the rules and are there to be used while they are users and don’t play by any rules. The biggest danger is when the used opt out of a rigged game. That is what women have done, that is what crony capitalism has done. There’s probably not too much left until a collapse, which will suck, but there’s nothing we can do about it so no use worrying about it.
The most outspoken individuals who slut shame are in fact, women.
Slut shaming is really the idea that male sexuality is inherently bad. So, to slut-shame a girl is to say she’s indulging in something dirty and gross. Men shouldn’t like sex, but women should because they’re pure. Women are allowed to talk dirty and naughty and engage in all sorts of sexual things but men are sexual predators should they. Women walk in slut walks (or stand idly by while the feminist scorn men with it, but not stand up to them). Women take the privilege to say emotionally charged things and if any man should try to stand up to it, he’s a rape-apologist. Of course this double standards goes for a long time. This is because men are inherently bad and women are inherently good, which means everything a woman does is OK and everything a man does is not.
Fortunately, our society hasn’t gone fully like this, because then society would be trashed but it seems feminist truly believe women are completely good and cannot do wrong, such that all that comes from their behavior is inherently good and must be accepted. All that men suffer is good (because remember, women always suffer worse, because they’re all Messiahs) and all that benefits women is inherently good because reasons. Our society will get to that point soon enough if it’s not corrected. The strength of men is actually so incredible that we can support a society of deranged women for quite a long time before society collapses. That’s a good and bad thing.
Male sexuality is a good thing, it seems to be the Yin-Yang thing. That is, male sexuality is incomplete without female sexuality and female sexuality is incomplete likewise. Perhaps that’s the problem, that they suffer because they cannot have a relationship with a male and inside is a longing. Perhaps it’s an Electra complex, that they have unresolved lusts for their fathers, either absent or not. Perhaps it’s unresolved lust for men in general that is healthy but they cannot see how to fulfill it. Their standards eliminate any chance of happiness since they see all men as bad. They will always recite their speeches to each other and themselves to constantly vilify men. You can’t have a relationship with an idiot and a loser, can you?
My boss is this highly intelligent Indian man. His wife likewise is this gorgeous Indian woman. She has a Ph.D, a devout Hindu, but she’s a good person, she talks a lot (a win for me, even in a platonic context), she’s full of knowledge (like him) and intelligent. The way she looks at him though is like a child losing his goddamn mind in a candy store. She looks at him the way a white woman looks at Justin Bieber. She adores him. This is a lucky man. It’s no wonder he’s so nice and so accomplished. He has that behind him how could he fail? She is wholey satisfied because she has a connection. She has successfully pair-bonded.
You know how women are, sadly, that they project and transfer and refuse to examine facts to see if what they feel or see is really there. You’d think that they’d be distressed to believe that men are inherently evil and patriarchy, so they’d double check to see if it’s true and become relieved when they find out it’s not, but instead they they become angry that someone would stand up to it. They obviously are projecting their pain of cognitive dissonance onto people and call it Rape Apology. Why aren’t they excited to find out that men really are good and a relationship with a man is fully of macho excitement? Why aren’t they excited to learn from men, such as negotiating better salaries, taking risks, doing stupid things for the experience, and living life? Why can’t they be excited for a man to make something and enjoy his creativity? Is it that they’ve been so hopelessly brainwashed by the beta males and their sadism?
Clearly, just being a male creates a wonderful world for women. Men love to invite women into their things and share it.
The way I see it, slut shaming is intimidation and is the result of reproductive competition. If you consider the current nature of women as meretricious (nice word to learn), then slut shaming is a tactic to maximize their value as a reproductive partner. In the period when we are the most vulnerable to the opposite sex, 18-24, it is possible for a low quality mate to acquire a quality (educated, strong in mind and body, healthy in mind and body, etc…) mate, using their youth. Once a female hits THE WALL her value as a reproductive mate is gone, even if she is a high quality woman.
As an animal it is common (if we are a monogamous species) for 10 men to compete for 1 quality woman. The problem is that it leaves the 9 other women reproductively lonely. Faced with such a problem the easiest solution is to become attractive. There are two ways to becoming attractive, make yourself more attractive and make others less attractive. Any moderately intelligent woman would do both so they put on make up (a deceitful tactic) and call the popular one a slut (another deceitful tactic), even if nothing happened. Men, as an animal (if we are a monogamous species), do not want a woman who sleeps around with multiple men because it means that the woman is not genuinely interested in a reproductive relationship with them. Although there are many valid reasons why men do not want a sperm dumpster, the aforementioned reason is the main one because men want to raise children. The same scenario applies to men, but since a man is “required” to have sex with a woman it does not have the same effect and it creates an illusionary double standard.
The real question is why do women use such deceitful tactics? There are many honest ways to do both techniques of changing attractiveness, such as exercising and being more engaging. All I can say is that women are meritricious for the simple reason that it has been the most efficient reproductive tactic. Women are taught very early to camouflage their thoughts, feelings, and looks to such a degree that they even confuse themselves, that is why they function mainly on instinct or, as they like to call it, “emotion” (deception on both fronts). Women are used to using deception and now that some light is being shined on them they are in complete confusion. Their response to the confusion is also simple, when in doubt stick to what you do best. However deception has a time limit and that fact is probably the reason for a woman’s fixation on institutions like marriage.
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