Refocusing through and after divorce

[Pharma9Participant 108]

Gentlemen,

As the title says, right now I am working through the divorce phase of getting all my priorities strait and now I am doing my upmost best to refocus my life objectives.

As easily imagined by most on this forum, doing so has not been an easy task since I worked so hard to build my life with someone and now it is just I. Almost too much free time on my hands to be honest.
Since moving back to my hometown I have tried to stay out of the public eye except for work and the gym. I do my best not to interact with anyone out of necessity for my peace of mind. So far it has been the best practice I have deduced. I made the mistake of trying my hand with online dating, however the amount of train wreck poodles on there trying to find a bone is astounding. So I have given up on that as well.

To not this post long winded, I will state my question now. I have worked very hard in this new job of mine to use that money to get right financially. I rarely spend anything except for bills and gas, and I am very active gym wise to refine my body and mind. Other than that I am drawing a blank as to fill my time. I read constantly but that can only take me so far to drain the hours. I don’t feel inclined to play games like a use too just because it feels like wasted time. Im thinking about volunteering or signing up for co-ed sports teams to possibly pass the time and meet new people but I am not sure about this either.

Anyone have any suggestions on how to fill the void without inviting negative repercussions into my life(i.e. a women)?

[Heave-Ho MgtowParticipant 1797]

Hobbys? I’m a drummer, play keyboards, have classic cars, motorcycles and I ride bicycles. Find a passion and live it. No hobbies? Take lessions, volunteer for something is in your list. You are struggling with unc~~~ing, and what you want in life. Your one lucky bastard. Smile.

skip the cavernous vag and go your own way

[Anonymous 1]

I would recommend to keep trying anything you have never tried before. I would try the volunteering or sports and if you don’t like it stop and try something else. I volunteer and me and guys guys sit back and watch the old ladies bicker about stuff, as us men get stuff done.

[NerdTunnelerParticipant]

Just try anything…Put yourself out of your comfort zone…Talk with the guys here and it will give you some ideas what they are doing post divorce…Its mostly about doing your stuff, building and recreating yourself..To just enjoy you for yourself and not for anybody else..I might seem selfish but we have been in the plantation for so long and given so much that we forgot who we are..Time to rediscover ourselves without the “master” f~~~ing it up…

I stand with feet apart and let my balls hang free...Manginas dont have balls...See how they stand and sit at the whim of their masters...

[FrostByteParticipant 19005]

Is there something you would like to learn?
I use meetup.com to find people who do things I like to do and it has expanded my social circle. There is kayaking, hiking gun clubs, and more in my area. You can volunteer.

If you rescue a damsel in distress, all you will get is a distressed damsel.

[FrostByteParticipant 19005]

NerdTunneler wrote:

I might seem selfish but we have been in the plantation for so long and given so much that we forgot who we are..

Taking time for yourself, doing for yourself, will seem foreign at first. It is NOT selfish. Don’t let past guilt and future shaming ever make you think it is.

If you rescue a damsel in distress, all you will get is a distressed damsel.

[4HorsemenParticipant 4]

After my divorce. I bought a block of land in mountains then I bought a portable sawmill. I built a cabin with my bare hands after milling my own timber. I put solar panels up, put a water tank in and built my own septic system. This saved me, it took up my spare time and helped me mull over things in my mind while i worked

I got back to doing to doing man things. Digging holes, using hand tools, building things and fixing broken machinery.

I was a little lost and defeated. I am now proud to be a man. I know i can walk into the forest and carve a life out of nothing. As i write this I am sitting here in a Tasmania winter, quite warm next to a fireplace made from a 44 gallon drum that I built. It heats my hot water for my shower and warms a cup of coffee and cooks a meal.

My batteries are fully charged and my solar panels are working well

It took time and was very therapeutic and the things that go wrong and disappointments when building in the bush makes life’s issues seem insignificant

It might not work for you but it worked for me

Find your inner peace Pharma9

[Manspread MansplainerParticipant 4222]

Ask yourself: What is it you USED to enjoy doing? Why did you stop doing these things?

Ask yourself: What have you always wanted to get into? What is something you have always wanted to try but never had a full opportunity?

When I went through a breakup once, I had such bad depression I couldn’t enjoy anything! Music, games, booze even food mean nothing to a depressed person. I am so happy to not be in that space and will never go down that path again. Hopefully you aren’t falling in that trap.

Pursue your own dreams. Pick up where your youth left off. Do something out of your normal comfort zone.
Just some thoughts to ponder.

If women ran the world = It would become the shithole you are seeing.

[MACHOParticipant]

NerdTunneler wrote:

Talk with the guys here and it will give you some ideas

Just a cool avatar idea for you my friend ⬇

You must own a better Crystal ball than I

[CombatRollParticipant 2594]

4Horsemen wrote:

After my divorce. I bought a block of land in mountains then I bought a portable sawmill. I built a cabin with my bare hands after milling my own timber. I put solar panels up, put a water tank in and built my own septic system. This saved me, it took up my spare time and helped me mull over things in my mind while i worked

I got back to doing to doing man things. Digging holes, using hand tools, building things and fixing broken machinery.

I was a little lost and defeated. I am now proud to be a man. I know i can walk into the forest and carve a life out of nothing. As i write this I am sitting here in a Tasmania winter, quite warm next to a fireplace made from a 44 gallon drum that I built. It heats my hot water for my shower and warms a cup of coffee and cooks a meal.

My batteries are fully charged and my solar panels are working well

It took time and was very therapeutic and the things that go wrong and disappointments when building in the bush makes life’s issues seem insignificant

It might not work for you but it worked for me

Find your inner peace Pharma9

Impressive! I’d like to hear more about the cabin and your story/background that brought you here.

[AutoliteParticipant]

I don’t even remember what being bored feels like. There’s always something that either needs a new engine or needs to be welded back together.

If I just want to kill some time with mindless activities I’ll either mow the yard, cut firewood or play video games…

[Author]

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