Reason I'm here (and why I spent this last year depressed)

[pcxl323Participant 6]

Hello all,

First of all thanks to those who have created this community. I’m fairly new to mgtow, and after nuking a decent relationship due to a female friend playing games with my emotions, I am working towards moving on and never going through this madness again.

To elaborate, there was a woman that I met in uni in the US. We were lab partners and kind of became friendly. I saw the warning signs about her because of her constant hookups, flirts, etc., all whilst trying to start a relationship. Most of her guys were friends, and tbh she was very easy to sleep with because of her standards.

For a good while, I stood as far away from being anything than just a friend. At most I would have lunch with her while we worked on our project. After a few months of not talking, she appeared again, she wanted to have lunch again (I paid of course) and wanted me to go to her friend’s birthday party. I agreed, but didn’t expect much since her and her boyfriend were official by now. By observing, it was obvious her and her boyfriend had an unhealthy relationship, partially due to both of their behaviours. Overall, she started talking to me out of the blue, posting pictures from our project on Facebook, and trying to get me to participate in posts and pictures on Facebook in order to ‘show the world our love’. I still thought nothing of it, and really foresaw her being a lead on.

I resisted for a while, but she ended up getting a job at my office and even though she would insist on going out for lunch, dinner. She would always insist my attention be on her, even though she flirted with my friends and co-workers, and could hardly keep her attention away from other guys. She would also start saying ‘I love you’ just to get my attention when she was depressed, even after talking about how how my co-worker is. After a while, I just ended up dating another girl, and she got apprehensive about it, wanting to know everything about her and all. I kept it pretty quiet because my girlfriend at the time disliked this friend a lot and saw right through her. Overall, it didn’t go too badly until my friend started wanting me to hangout with her during the Christmas holiday. This was when I started to crack, because my parent’s really liked her compared to anyone else I dated. She really put on a show. What got me emotional towards this friend is that she started texting me about how she wanted to date me, and that she missed me a lot. And since I wasn’t open about my current relationship, she was trying to play it off as if she was my girlfriend. When I met her mum, she even talked about, we’ll get married someday. It really messed with my head, because I’m a go getter and will work on a plan once given a vission. Eventually, I started getting emotional and broke up with my girlfriend of 3 months irrationally because of this entire debacle. I saw my life with this friend, and didn’t want to let it go now.

Starting my new single life, my friend remained sort of interested in talking to me, but mostly because she was lonely. She ended up dropping out of uni to go back home and work. She didn’t have too many friends so I didn’t mind. I started giving her the benefit of the doubt that she was going to change, and maybe she could work and take classes at a community college. Since I was busy at work and studying during the days, we would talk at nights fairly often, and she eventually brought up going to a football (soccer here in North America) match, to which I agreed. She acted surprised that I got tickets (all for show again), and when it came time for the game, it became obvious that she was full on distracted by other guys, even dipping out for a bit to talk to a guy that she led on and dumped behind the scenes. I got pretty flustered privately, but still held on to the idea of her everyday.

She eventually went silent to me over a mate she just met on Tinder. She eventually texted me randomly only because she felt forgotten when he showed up late to pick her up. She thought I forgot her, to which I replied, no, I think about her every day. Her text back was about how much she misses me, etc. etc. and that this other guy is not worth it.

Finally, up to the past month, this friend started getting more serious with this guy from Tinder and getting herself into another somewhat rocky relationship (from my observation). So she’s been back and forth between wanting to hang out and giving me the silent treatment. I didn’t get a text back until after how boyfriend left for sea duty in the navy, and I posted a facebook post about dating my ex-girlfriend again. The text read of jealousy, and she ended up calling me, suggesting to meet my family, hangout, go hiking, travel to Europe, and a slew of other things that most people would do with a girlfriend, family, or a really longtime friend. Another mention is now her intent to date to marry, only after I mention that was my intention a few months earlier. It’s like she trolls around everything I write and say, only to repeat it back to me, and brag that the guy she’s with is getting that benefit or doing that for her. Later on, I kind of did agree to visit her since I was passing through her town, where she pretty much just bragged about her boyfriend and how perfect he is, while I tried to play happy and not jealous (unlike her). She even texted me about flowers…flowers that I got (her favourite kind as well).

I’ve only known this girl on and off for a year and a half, and even then, I’ve done a lot for her than probably many guys before, even when I half-assed cared and wanted to stay far away.

I got tickets to her favourite American football team for her birthday later this year, buckling into pressure from her constant reminders and my parents seeing her as an undeniably great person. This pretty much sunk my relationship. My girlfriend violently broke up with me last week because of this mess when she coincidentally makes her relationship to the Tinder guy public to her friends for the first time.

Now I’m back to being single, back to a silent treatment (her boyfriend is back for the month), and I’ve got my parent’s asking about this friend all the time now. I’m an emotional wreck now and can’t concentrate on my classwork.

I can’t say that this experience will steer me away from the traditional route of relationships/marriage, but it definitely makes me listen to my instincts again and avoid the women who are only about playing games. Since I’m pretty sure I’m going to see her during her birthday (coincidentally when her boyfriend is on sea duty again), I need to figure out how to make a not so awkward exit, or at least set the record straight, no matter if this is intentional or not.

Thanks for reading 🙂

[RoyDalParticipant]

Welcome! You will find lots to think about on this site, and lots of leads to other things to think about.

… but it definitely makes me listen to my instincts again and avoid the women who are only about playing games.

In my experience, this can not be done. They are all like that. Your Ex might be more like that than others, but it is merely a matter of degree.

In my case, even my beloved close relatives are like that.

Society asks MGTOWs: Why are you not making more tax-slaves?

[pcxl323Participant 6]

Thanks mate, honestly I’m just disappointed at this one. I feel like she tried so hard to convince herself that she was different when she was just the same. I’m not willing to accept getting screwed like this again.

[chirParticipant]

You see, she was training you to be her faithful beta-blue.  She involves you in her life and puts you in her friend-zone.  If you stay there accessible to her over time she knows she has a beta-blue on the line.  Now she can go and ride the c~~~-carousel with all the Bad-Boyz and get plowed.  She has her “backup plan” in place.   That’s you.

 

It is by caffeine alone I set my mind in motion, it is by the beans of Java that thoughts acquire speed, the hands acquire shaking, the shaking becomes a warning; it is by caffeine alone I set my mind in motion.

[ILiveAgainParticipant]

She sounds more crazy than normal. Don’t put your dick in crazy.

Seeing that all women are insane … well …. mr dick needs to find another hobby.

You sir … are being played … like a fiddle.

Remove her from your life and never contact again.

[BestoftherestParticipant 285]

Look up these terms before you read.
–The wall
–Beta male
–Beta male provider
–C~~~ carousal

Your situation is a classic “C~~~ Carousal and the Beta Male’s Conundrum” ™
This female is a classic c~~~ carousal VIP and will be named “CCVIP” within this post. She f~~~s and sucks who ever she wants, her god given prerogative, but they tend to be Alpha males, losers, one-night stands, and regular hook-ups. She does not want to settle down because she will find a beta male to provide her with emotional and or financial support.

The beta male is you. She has total control over you and if you break away, like getting a gf she will pull some strings to insure the CCVIP is the center of your universe. This CCVIP’s game plan is very deep and will take a moment to explain.

As of right now you have a bright future, she needs you around to have an emotional crutch and monitor your success. She will keep you in her circle so you can be that guy that she crys to on the phone while she takes it up the butt. Understand women love to talk and talking to a man get them off a bit. Women need both forms of sexual pleasure to stay running at optimal efficiency. The men she f~~~s are not about her emotional state she knows this. So you’re her emotional support fix.

The next stage in her plan is to keep you around until she is ready to settle down. Settling down is typically done by the c~~~ carousal whores after they hit the wall. They can no longer compete with their younger selves for the attention of the men that f~~~ed them. So the wall changes her perspective. She will not longer suck dick, take it up the butt, put out on the first date, or just f~~~ for tacos. NO WAY, your CCVIP will demand the most traditional means of courtship imaginable from her beta male (you.) In short you’re her long term back up beta male, by the time she is prepared to settle down you should be on track to have the money to give her children or support another males children.

You should be a bit upset by now, and I want to rile you up some more! Imagine she is a sports car a Porsche! She lets all sorts of dirtbags in. They ride her hard as f~~~ because that’s the best way to run sports cars like her. Of course these cars need a lot of maintenance, oil chances, new brakes, etc. Even more so when f~~~ed hard like your CCVIP. So they drive her into the mechanics shop and wait for you to fix her. You’re the specialist that fixes the mess. You buy all the parts and put in the labor to make her capable to run another set of laps. You work for free and your losing valuable money on parts! In a few years the car just doesn’t have what it takes to fight off the new generation of Porches. It will come to the shop and no one will be taking it out. This is your time to get a ride, at long last! The Porsche is ready to settle down and it has chosen you! You lucky dog! But the Porsche will no longer do the nice tight turns, it won’t accelerate like it did before. In the sad state it’s in it will need constant time and money to keep it running. You will be pouring yourself into fixing problems everyone else created, while never getting that performance. When you add up the cost and time you realize you could’ve bought two new porches or rented out a couple dozen instead.

Stop being around this women, this CCVIP is not your friend. Just leave her alone, no matter how dramatic her story gets leave her alone! This women will bring ruin to you. In ten years time, if you stayed away, you will see what she has become. It will 100% involve multiple fathers, a couple of divorces, and some form of mental condition.

"Nearly all men can stand adversity, but if you want to test a man's character, give him power."
Abraham Lincoln

[Anonymous 42]

pcxl323 wrote:

I’m an emotional wreck now and can’t concentrate on my classwork.

@323, she keeps feeding you to the machine gears that drive the c~~~ carousel! Get off and walk away for your own sanity, shes slowly grinding your spirit into emulsified orbiter mud. Like a dog she has your tail between your legs, F~~~ that! The hair behind your neck should be standing up like a German Shepard! She’s whipping your man spirit into something you don’t want to become (a mangina).

You need to abolish her from your life, and all that are like her!

That woman has serious psychological paradigms, She’s a carousel Clown, a Queen orbiter hub, An attention whore, and many other psychological subspecies that dwell in her RUINED HEAD!

RUN FOR YOUR LIFE!

[FermatParticipant 3478]

Your situation is not unique.  It is part of an extremely common phenomenon of beta male orbiting and c~~~ carousel riding. The more you realize your situation is the new norm for sexual relationships the more aware you’ll become of true female nature. This is not an isolated incident nor is it an exception to the rule. It is the new norm and let no female relative or friend tell you otherwise.

I have discovered a truly remarkable list of reasons why women are not necessary for a happy life, but alas this margin is too small to contain it.

[LonerBonerParticipant 358]

Bestoftherest wrote:

Imagine she is a sports car a Porsche! She lets all sorts of dirtbags in. They ride her hard as f~~~ because that’s the best way to run sports cars like her. Of course these cars need a lot of maintenance, oil chances, new brakes, etc. Even more so when f~~~ed hard like your CCVIP. So they drive her into the mechanics shop and wait for you to fix her. You’re the specialist that fixes the mess. You buy all the parts and put in the labor to make her capable to run another set of laps. You work for free and your losing valuable money on parts! In a few years the car just doesn’t have what it takes to fight off the new generation of Porches. It will come to the shop and no one will be taking it out. This is your time to get a ride, at long last! The Porsche is ready to settle down and it has chosen you! You lucky dog! But the Porsche will no longer do the nice tight turns, it won’t accelerate like it did before. In the sad state it’s in it will need constant time and money to keep it running. You will be pouring yourself into fixing problems everyone else created, while never getting that performance. When you add up the cost and time you realize you could’ve bought two new porches or rented out a couple dozen instead.

So well described! I love it..f~~~ing attention whores.

Keep clam i'm dyslexic.

[BestoftherestParticipant 285]

LonerBoner wrote:

So well described! I love it..f~~~ing attention whores.

Yeah I’m the kind of guy that learns through analogies and a mental image. I do my best work in that state of mind. My aim was to be a hard core realist troll on the beta male orbiter and his target of affection.

"Nearly all men can stand adversity, but if you want to test a man's character, give him power."
Abraham Lincoln

[bigboy83Participant 11312]

First your depress, then it’s discovery, then you stabilize, then your happy!

Welcome to MGTOW, homie!

Shit Tested, Cunt Approved.

[pcxl323Participant 6]

Thank you all for the feedback. I really appreciate it! It sucks that I wasted so much time. But I’ll cut her off and move on.

[Author]

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