Picking up the Pieces

[GraniteHead1Participant 7]

Hey, fellas-

I came to this site after a suggestion from my brother. I have very recently come to the end of a long romance, meaning I got dumped after years of letting myself get jerked around by the woman I thought I knew. A part of me knew this was going on, but in my fear of pain, I made excuses for her behavior and “knew” that she’s never do that to ME.

She was literally the girl next door, the place next to mine in a vacation retreat type of area. We were both in our late 30s. She had a husband pulling very good money and 2 beautiful young children. She started making advances, saying she was in a bad marriage, and I’m very sorry to say that I succumbed to her charms. I regret participating in the “stepping out” as she later called it, but I was a lonely guy and she was a sexy woman.

Well, she went after me full tilt, and eventually pressured me into asking her to marry me. This was even before her separation, mind you. Warning sign? Now, OF COURSE. But then, well, she’d never do that to ME. I was in the process of building a house, and I built the house with her and her two kids in mind, with her happily providing suggestions and all indications that she intended to move in with me. These suggestions added $50K onto the price tag, of course. However, one day a few months later, she said that she was going to tend to her kids for a while (this was a long-distance relationship, as her primary residence is 2 hours away). She is a smart woman, and she was very careful to be vague and not give me closure. In retrospect, why should a calculating animal give closure? Might need that man for something later.

Fast-forward a couple years. I can’t remember how, but we reconnected. She was still separated from her husband and was DESPERATELY in need of rent money. Sir Galahad to the rescue! Nevermind that I was up to my neck paying for this ridiculously too-big house that was empty, that I had built essentially for her. I’ll send you a check, sweetie. Oh, thank you, thank you. Well, things were going well after that, and I thought we were actually going to get together. Then the recession hit, and I needed to change careers, and my fortunes took a downturn. Then the negativity started. Continually focusing on my negatives, and beating me down. Eventually that and stress made me miss a few of her booty calls, and that was apparently the last straw. Then came the SECOND sit-down, and the same vague, no-closure dump conversation.

Now, she’s got a new boy toy, and they are next door right this minute at the vacation home next to mine.

I realize I’m near the top of the list of romantic idiots. My brothers, as I wait for the bleeding to stop, do you have any advice as to how I can live with this disgusting animal being next door? This is my grandfather’s camp, and I can’t sell it. This has always been my dream to live here, I just need a way to process the fact that she’ll be blowing this guy (and others, later, presumably) almost within my sight.

GH

[heads-upParticipant 320]

I know this will seem “odd” but let her blow the f~~~ what ever she wants………………is the property still financialy viable………..just cut her out as best you can and make it work for you bro.I’m feeling you though,start looking at salvage my fellow “dude”,its another universal warning to aLL GUYS.
Salvage what you can in terms of personal wealth.

[Anonymous 18]

It will get better to the point where you’d feel sorry for herself. What may seem like victimizing you and other naive men in her life, once far removed from her memories and charm would allow you to see that she is the real victim of her treacherous mind. These types never die with peace. I would gar as far to say they don’t know what internal peace really is.

Thank yourself for recognizing it and let the difficult recovery begin. The worst enemy here is not her but denial. Accept what happened, and move on. Whatever way that works for you.

Welcome.

[heads-upParticipant 320]

ON rethinking I think “get the f~~~ out of there,but what the hell do I know.Your life and your future??????

[RoyDalParticipant]

GraniteHead1 wrote:

I got dumped after years of letting myself get jerked around by the woman I thought I knew.

All emotions run their course. Then they are replaced by others, often the opposite. The kind of serious stress you’ve been through appears to have kicked off this famous cycle: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/K%C3%BCbler-Ross_model

About the house that is too big. Can you sell it and replace it with something you can afford? Better yet, can you rent it and make it support itself?

Society asks MGTOWs: Why are you not making more tax-slaves?

[MotivParticipant 441]

Welcome …Stay strong my personal view is you would be better off away from her to get yourself back on the road to getting her s~~~ out of your head but if its not possible you need to start blocking her out your head with force to get started..

Cool story babe now go make me a sandwich

[EscapedMentalPatientParticipant 1489]

GraniteHead1 wrote:

Hey, fellas-

I came to this site after a suggestion from my brother. I have very recently come to the end of a long romance, meaning I got dumped after years of letting myself get jerked around by the woman I thought I knew. A part of me knew this was going on, but in my fear of pain, I made excuses for her behavior and “knew” that she’s never do that to ME.

She was literally the girl next door, the place next to mine in a vacation retreat type of area. We were both in our late 30s. She had a husband pulling very good money and 2 beautiful young children. She started making advances, saying she was in a bad marriage, and I’m very sorry to say that I succumbed to her charms. I regret participating in the “stepping out” as she later called it, but I was a lonely guy and she was a sexy woman.

Well, she went after me full tilt, and eventually pressured me into asking her to marry me. This was even before her separation, mind you. Warning sign? Now, OF COURSE. But then, well, she’d never do that to ME. I was in the process of building a house, and I built the house with her and her two kids in mind, with her happily providing suggestions and all indications that she intended to move in with me. These suggestions added K onto the price tag, of course. However, one day a few months later, she said that she was going to tend to her kids for a while (this was a long-distance relationship, as her primary residence is 2 hours away). She is a smart woman, and she was very careful to be vague and not give me closure. In retrospect, why should a calculating animal give closure? Might need that man for something later.

Fast-forward a couple years. I can’t remember how, but we reconnected. She was still separated from her husband and was DESPERATELY in need of rent money. Sir Galahad to the rescue! Nevermind that I was up to my neck paying for this ridiculously too-big house that was empty, that I had built essentially for her. I’ll send you a check, sweetie. Oh, thank you, thank you. Well, things were going well after that, and I thought we were actually going to get together. Then the recession hit, and I needed to change careers, and my fortunes took a downturn. Then the negativity started. Continually focusing on my negatives, and beating me down. Eventually that and stress made me miss a few of her booty calls, and that was apparently the last straw. Then came the SECOND sit-down, and the same vague, no-closure dump conversation.

Now, she’s got a new boy toy, and they are next door right this minute at the vacation home next to mine.

I realize I’m near the top of the list of romantic idiots. My brothers, as I wait for the bleeding to stop, do you have any advice as to how I can live with this disgusting animal being next door? This is my grandfather’s camp, and I can’t sell it. This has always been my dream to live here, I just need a way to process the fact that she’ll be blowing this guy (and others, later, presumably) almost within my sight.

GH

Welcome to MGTOW.com Sir Granitehead. I like the avatar. P~~~ed me off to no f~~~ing end when I found out it was a fake as a child.

GraniteHead1 wrote:

I was a lonely guy and she was a sexy woman.

Never before in my life have I heard of such a thing. Clearly, you are a mutant freak. HOW COULD YOU?!?!?!?!?!

GraniteHead1 wrote:

I was in the process of building a house, and I built the house with her and her two kids in mind,

Obviously, not only a mutant freak, but a SELFISH BASTARD!!!!!!!!!! YOU CAD!!!!!!!!!

GraniteHead1 wrote:

Now, OF COURSE. But then, well, she’d never do that to ME.

Never would a fair lass do such a thing to a freakish mutant bastard, who so obviously treats women with such disregard. Again, you’re a BASTARD!!!!!

GraniteHead1 wrote:

Fast-forward a couple years. I can’t remember how, but we reconnected. She was still separated from her husband and was DESPERATELY in need of rent money.

And I am betting that you HELPED HER, you have nothing but wanton, careless and utter disregard for THE HUMAN RACE!!!! Now you are a selfish, freakish mutant bastard, so callous that not only have you bought a Unicorn, you have gilded it, and have built a statue of it you philanthropistic, freakish, granite-headed, mutated, selfish, horrendouse excuse for a human being. F~~~ YOU!!!!!!

GraniteHead1 wrote:

I’ll send you a check, sweetie. Oh, thank you, thank you. Well, things were going well after that, and I thought we were actually going to get together. Then the recession hit, and I needed to change careers, and my fortunes took a downturn. Then the negativity started. Continually focusing on my negatives, and beating me down.

NO WOMAN WOULD EVER DO THIS, MY GOD YOUR LIST OF NEGATIVE TRAITS ARE BECOMING OVERWHELMING, YOU LYING, GRANITE-HEADED, FREAKISH, MUTANT WANTON CARELESS DISREGARDING BIGFOOT LYING WRETCHED BASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSTARD!!!!!!!!!!!

GraniteHead1 wrote:

Now, she’s got a new boy toy, and they are next door right this minute at the vacation home next to mine.

I realize I’m near the top of the list of romantic idiots. My brothers, as I wait for the bleeding to stop, do you have any advice as to how I can live with this disgusting animal being next door? This is my grandfather’s camp, and I can’t sell it. This has always been my dream to live here, I just need a way to process the fact that she’ll be blowing this guy (and others, later, presumably) almost within my sight.

I stop my callous and blatant attempt at black humour here, my friend, and genuinely: Welcome, sir. I hope I at least got a giggle. And in your story, don’t mention YOURSELF in a negative light one bit. YOU were a great human being and not an idiot. SHE was and is a parasite, so we’ll stop referring to you in the negative, please.

You have come to the right place my friend.

Your story is one of horror, and unfortunately, I wish it were a solitary, lone, black statistic.

I have a feeling that your experiences are going to be absolutely invaluable for men to read.

You have just come out of the trenches, sir; you’re bleeding, you’re missing a limb, you’ve lost your patriotism, you’ve lost just about all that a man feels he can lose…………….but……………..you’re alive.

So will begin for you a sense of brotherhood, unlike any you’ve ever known.

As you become familiar with the concepts, theories and insights on this site, you will find that you are probably the strongest person that you will ever meet.

There are a million things I would like to add to this, and will do so in future posts, sir.

As per being stuck with the huge boat anchor of a house you have (Financially speaking), it might be possible to do what I did with my home, which I now own.

I rented out every damn room in the place, made the kitchen, den and living room a communal space (as well as the back yard and patio). I rented to bachelors who had steady work, who were quiet and generally neat, and it really took a lot of financial stress out of the situation.

Not to mention, I felt after going through so much s~~~ with women, that there was almost a nice familiar camaraderie within the household. I kept it with individuals who were drama free, and they were never allowed to have overnight guests.

Welcome to the beginning of a very wonderful journey, my friend, and welcome to MGTOW.com

Cheers, brother.

[GraniteHead1Participant 7]

The bleeding is slowing, so I’m happy with that. It just absolutely blows my mind that she is so emotionally vacant that she can bring the next one in in the exact same spaces that we had our romance and apparently not think twice about it. I really shouldn’t be surprised, though; that’s exactly what she did with me when she was married. Turns out her ex-husband was the smart one. If/when he finds out that she s~~~canned me, he’ll get some satisfaction out of it. I guess that can be my penance for that part of it.

Selling this house is no problem, though the market sucks here. I have to sell this house to afford to move permanently to my grandfather’s camp. That’s the one she’ll be next door to, whenever she comes up for a weekend or whatever. I’ll just plant some more trees to obscure the view to her camp, or maybe build a fence and paint her side of it fluorescent green.

I have thought that I may actually feel a little sorry for her eventually. Time is starting to tell on her, and even she will get to the point that she won’t be able to attract the men she wants, which are good-looking men with money that will be strong and support her, but also let her control the hell out them. I’m actually working on getting back in shape, so I’ll hopefully be on a more positive track. Her youngest will be out of high school this June, so the clock is ticking on her having her family to keep her company. Her son is an outstanding kid, which in itself is amazing considering that his parents are both selfish assholes. He has kept our line of comm open, but I had to tell him that I couldn’t continue to do that. I’m afraid she would use that as an opportunity to get me in deep s~~~ for whatever bizarre reason. Another casualty of her narcissism..

I guess it could’ve been a lot worse. Doesn’t feel like that right now, but I’m starting to see brief glimpses of light in my future. Might drive to the camp this afternoon, supposed to be hot today. Not that this would be why I would go there, but I also might see the new boy toy mowing her lawn or doing the camp maintenance as he has been instructed.

GH

[GraniteHead1Participant 7]

Hello, MGTOW brothers-

This is an update to the sad story described in my initial post when I first came here.

Fast-forward, and I have sold the boat-anchor house. I took a major loss, but I have my equity back… about as much as I had when I first met her, which is still a big chunk of cash. I am now focused on MY passions and mine alone. And let me tell you brothers, especially you young ones. IT IS INCREDIBLE. Not to have someone sapping my time, emotional energy, and money. It is mind-boggling to think of how I (and men in general) was programmed to serve, and escaping that is to open a totally new world. If I’d only done this in my twenties, I would have been so much better off. I can’t go back, so that’s a waste of energy to think about. Anyway, I’m shopping for combo amps for my guitars and focusing on enjoying ME. Much like Angus Young and the fellas back in the late 70s, this is MY “Back in Black” time.

And I’m nearly at the point of feeling sorry for her. Well, maybe.

Cheers
GH1

[SuggestiusParticipant 3312]

Fluffy bastard, you have finally found me. I feel my eyes watering. It must be windy over here.

Happiness for all and let no one be forgotten ("Roadside picnic", Arkady and Boris Strugatsky)

[BlakeGuyParticipant 287]

It is mind-boggling to think of how I (and men in general) was programmed to serve, and escaping that is to open a totally new world. If I’d only done this in my twenties, I would have been so much better off.

This is exactly my view. So hard to figure it out and so nice when you do figure it out. Basically the deal is most women (say what 80,90 percent), will play the same game and use that white knight trait many of us have.

Let the good times roll

[Y_Participant 4591]

Be welcome. Remember your new life is just beginning

[Anonymous 1]

Y_ wrote:

Be welcome. Remember your new life is just beginning

Ahah, you didn’t read the post did you?(hint: watch the dates)

@granitehead1
Well done man, getting up for yourself and living for yourself, the mindset must change completely when you are bluepilled, it is not easy and fast, but surely worth it in the end.

[MeisterParticipant 2093]

GraniteHead1 wrote:

Hello, MGTOW brothers-

This is an update to the sad story described in my initial post when I first came here.

Fast-forward, and I have sold the boat-anchor house. I took a major loss, but I have my equity back… about as much as I had when I first met her, which is still a big chunk of cash. I am now focused on MY passions and mine alone. And let me tell you brothers, especially you young ones. IT IS INCREDIBLE. Not to have someone sapping my time, emotional energy, and money. It is mind-boggling to think of how I (and men in general) was programmed to serve, and escaping that is to open a totally new world. If I’d only done this in my twenties, I would have been so much better off. I can’t go back, so that’s a waste of energy to think about. Anyway, I’m shopping for combo amps for my guitars and focusing on enjoying ME. Much like Angus Young and the fellas back in the late 70s, this is MY “Back in Black” time.

And I’m nearly at the point of feeling sorry for her. Well, maybe.

Cheers
GH1

Good for you!

Stay away from women.
Good luck.

Monk

[Author]

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