On an interesting crossroad? Advice/thoughts needed.

[GrotesqueRogueParticipant 116]

I am taking plenty of red pills every day, can’t stop. And it’s surprising that I constantly go through different iterations constantly rethinking what I already know.

One thing that concerns me is that I spend way too much time taking red pills. I mean it. Way too much time. Sure, it all comes to self-discipline, but here’s what concerns me – taking into account that I constantly re-iterate things I already know, does it mean that there are so many things I am not sure of? I understand that only I can really answer this question, but still, I would like your perspective on it. Can it also be that this way I emulate the process of actually doing smth? That instead of doing real s~~~ I am sitting here and on youtube day and night. Has someone found himself in such a situation?

Another thing is that I was thinking about asking a girl out. I understand that it might not be a wise move, but I look at it as some experience – to see how I would react to certain situations. I hang out with her 3-4 times (no real moves, just testing the waters and seeing if there are noticeable red flags), and I already noticed some of my behaviour that I don’t like (from that perspective hanging out with her was worth it – I wouldn’t have noticed those small moments if it wasn’t for spending time with her). One thing I am proud of – I am doing what I want, for example – I go jogging, she finds out about it, asks to join, I don’t mind, I do what I plan, and only then I spend some time with her. Or I go to the beach to catch some sun (because these were the last sunny days here), just notify her that Im going there and if she wants she can join for I don’t really care. This is progress for me.
Anyway, I was thinking why I even wanted to f~~~ing spend time on her and getting laid with her – much of the red pills kinda killed my sex drive, and the only reason I came up with is that I want to do something I wouldn’t have done earlier.
You see, I never had to ask girls out – they would usually initiate it. And to some extent I want to step on my fear to make a move.
And the question is – are my motives reasonable? I might get laid, I might have fun (she is fun to be around and do some athletic s~~~ together), but the point is to overcome my fear (do smth I never did before), see if I changed my behaviour (I remember my flaws and now know about red flags and female nature in general), and even if I get rejected (not that I really care about it, this is just some stupid rejection) – see how I would walk away (thing I rarely did before as well).

And the last thing.
I became so reluctant to even spend time online on females I previously considered friends, This is really good. I don’t want to chat with them, I don’t want to skype them, I don’t f~~~ing want to deal with them. SO F~~~ING RELUCTANT. It sure feels good. If they write to me, I might answer, but in general – f~~~ that s~~~.

I guess I am slowly changing for the better.
Some questions to be answered, but there’s progress, there is.

It’s time to hit the gym.

Have a nice day.

[RoyDalParticipant]

GrotesqueRogue wrote:

I am taking plenty of red pills every day, can’t stop.

Sounds good to me! Keep it up.

Society asks MGTOWs: Why are you not making more tax-slaves?

[Jon the Ex-SquidParticipant 298]

GrotesqueRogue wrote:

I am taking plenty of red pills every day, can’t stop. And it’s surprising that I constantly go through different iterations constantly rethinking what I already know.

One thing that concerns me is that I spend way too much time taking red pills. I mean it. Way too much time. Sure, it all comes to self-discipline, but here’s what concerns me – taking into account that I constantly re-iterate things I already know, does it mean that there are so many things I am not sure of? I understand that only I can really answer this question, but still, I would like your perspective on it. Can it also be that this way I emulate the process of actually doing smth? That instead of doing real s~~~ I am sitting here and on youtube day and night. Has someone found himself in such a situation?

I did that pretty extensively when I first started researching MGTOW and the community. Its normal. You’re learning something new and every video or word you read reinforces the principals. It takes awhile to learn a foreign language before it becomes second nature and confidence grows. This isn’t much different. Just don’t let it affect you negatively (ie: you’re not doing what needs to be done because you’re obsessing about the videos). I listen to some videos in the car when I’m on my way to do various things. Listen while you jog?

GrotesqueRogue wrote:

Another thing is that I was thinking about asking a girl out. I understand that it might not be a wise move, but I look at it as some experience – to see how I would react to certain situations. I hang out with her 3-4 times (no real moves, just testing the waters and seeing if there are noticeable red flags), and I already noticed some of my behaviour that I don’t like (from that perspective hanging out with her was worth it – I wouldn’t have noticed those small moments if it wasn’t for spending time with her). One thing I am proud of – I am doing what I want, for example – I go jogging, she finds out about it, asks to join, I don’t mind, I do what I plan, and only then I spend some time with her. Or I go to the beach to catch some sun (because these were the last sunny days here), just notify her that Im going there and if she wants she can join for I don’t really care. This is progress for me.
Anyway, I was thinking why I even wanted to f~~~ing spend time on her and getting laid with her – much of the red pills kinda killed my sex drive, and the only reason I came up with is that I want to do something I wouldn’t have done earlier.
You see, I never had to ask girls out – they would usually initiate it. And to some extent I want to step on my fear to make a move.
And the question is – are my motives reasonable? I might get laid, I might have fun (she is fun to be around and do some athletic s~~~ together), but the point is to overcome my fear (do smth I never did before), see if I changed my behaviour (I remember my flaws and now know about red flags and female nature in general), and even if I get rejected (not that I really care about it, this is just some stupid rejection) – see how I would walk away (thing I rarely did before as well).

I’m biased here because I rarely date anymore and really have no time or interest in dealing with women. A lot of their manipulation is so subtle that you won’t even see it coming. But I can step back, look at your situation and offer this: if you enjoy doing non-relationship things with this chick, then why would you want to muddy it with something more relationshippy? IE: You enjoy jogging with her or going to the beach, then why would you want to f~~~ her and potentially have that get more complicated?

Don’t s~~~ where you eat. Don’t f~~~ where you relax. Why? Because if you do and the relationship goes to hell, now you might very well have to avoid doing the things you enjoy at the places you enjoy.

In regards to doing something you fear (making the first move), why do you fear it? I mean, who cares, right? I’m afraid of heights. Its why I went into the submarine force. I have absolutely no desire to go sky diving just to overcome a fear that doesn’t affect my daily life. Are you trying to prove to yourself that you can do this, or are you trying to prove to others?

GrotesqueRogue wrote:

And the last thing.
I became so reluctant to even spend time online on females I previously considered friends, This is really good. I don’t want to chat with them, I don’t want to skype them, I don’t f~~~ing want to deal with them. SO F~~~ING RELUCTANT. It sure feels good. If they write to me, I might answer, but in general – f~~~ that s~~~.

Most women only reach out to men online when they want something or to keep you in their harem. Are these people contacting you to use you as an emotional tampon: “My bf and I just broke up. <two hours later> Am I right? Was that so much to ask?” So yeah, stop feeding their drama/dumping habit.

[Soldier-MedicParticipant 2566]

GrotesqueRogue wrote:

One thing that concerns me is that I spend way too much time taking red pills. I mean it. Way too much time. Sure, it all comes to self-discipline, but here’s what concerns me – taking into account that I constantly re-iterate things I already know, does it mean that there are so many things I am not sure of? I understand that only I can really answer this question, but still, I would like your perspective on it.

Jon the Ex-Squid wrote:

I did that pretty extensively when I first started researching MGTOW and the community. Its normal. You’re learning something new and every video or word you read reinforces the principals.

I have to agree with my former sea faring brother here. But to add to that, for me, the red pills were such a revelation, that I couldn’t let them go. I had finally found that missing part of my thinking that allowed me to see things for how they truly are. I eventually had to unplug for about three weeks, because of the emotional overload, in order to be able to process.

In so far as dating and relationships, Ex-Squid said it perfectly. The only thing I would add as a pretext to what he had to say is that you ask yourself one question. What is the point of establishing any relationship with a woman to begin with? If you fully understand the nature of women, both as a single woman with no kids, and what they transform in to after they have birthed their social validation, then why bother to begin with? If you just want some pussy then go for it. Pump and dump. But as our submariner said, don’t s~~~ where you eat.

On line correspondence/Skyping? KeyMaster said it best. He first looks at the message and asks if responding to the message is something he is interested in or even worth his time. Then hits the ‘Delete’ button.

"I asked you a question. I didn't ask you to repeat what the voices in you head are telling you" ~ Me. ........Yes I'm still angry.

[SandalsParticipant 4253]

Stop writing smth. Write out the word “something”. I don’t want to be insulting (you know who writes like that), so let’s just leave it at that. Just write like a man.

Red pills are fine. That’s how you get through it.

Jon the Ex-Squid wrote:

It takes awhile to learn a foreign language before it becomes second nature and confidence grows. This isn’t much different.

Great point.

Regarding asking the girl out, don’t define yourself in relation to her. Who you are is not connected to her feelings for you. When MGTOW goes down, we don’t sit here at the computer crying about it because suddenly we no longer know who we are. We say, “Oh, MGTOW is down. Ok, time to do something else then.” Same thing, if she wants to f~~~ you, enjoy the f~~~, and recognize that at some point it’s all going to go South anyway, be it seven months or seven years. So don’t define yourself in terms of a relationship.

Now… NEVER ask a girl out, EVER! Your fun is not conditional on her response. Don’t ever ask a girl anything, because, quite frankly, you don’t really give a damn, and she isn’t mature enough to give a proper answer either. Don’t even ask, “How are you”, because you don’t care. If you want to know how she’s doing, you’ll tell her how she’s doing. If you really want to hang out with a girl, you say, “I am heading to Billy’s Grill this Tuesday at 6pm. Join me there.” You DO NOT ASK, because you don’t give a damn if she’s there or not. YOU’RE having fun, with or without her. You are simply telling her to join in YOUR fun. You are doing her a FAVOR by allowing her in YOUR circle. If she gives you some excuse, like a television show or hanging out with the girls or whatever, you know where you stand in her favor. Beneath television shows. Beneath her girlfriends. Regardless of what she says, go to Billy’s Grill anyway at that time, and have a great time by yourself!

Actually, I didn’t figure this out until later in life: if a girl won’t go out with you, it’s usually because she is afraid that once you find out how royally messed up she is, or how many dicks she’s sucked and f~~~ed, she is afraid you won’t want her anymore. Girls know guys put them on pedestals, and they also know they don’t deserve it. That’s why girls like assholes, because if the guy treats the girl like crap, at least the girl knows the guy won’t expect much from her, and she knows she can’t deliver to a man with high expectations.

[Anonymous 29]

GrotesqueRogue wrote:

here’s what concerns me – taking into account that I constantly re-iterate things I already know, does it mean that there are so many things I am not sure of?

Answer to your first question only.
You are caught in a loop, like a dog chasing its tail. Not healthy and you need to control it or you will suffer a burn out..

Other brothers can answer your second question.

[Author]

Posts