NOW vs. LATER

[StealthParticipant 5330]

In high school I asked a random teacher, “Isn’t it better to do the things you WANT to do in life NOW, before you do those things you HAVE to do?” He thought for a moment and replied, actually it’s better to do the things you HAVE to do, so that later you can do whatever you want.

Looking back from approaching forty, I’d say both approaches have their place. Personally I’ve tended towards delayed gratification, and have really put much of my life on hold for the sake of long-term goals or stability. Divorce disrupted the finish line once it was crossed and I started over, basically losing/re-doing a decade. There were some long-term plans I was taught were right or healthy, but ended up being not what I wanted or actually not healthy at all. So more backtracking & time lost. The trouble with going too far living for the future, is you end up having never really lived your life along the way.

Of course the opposite extreme is problematic. My friends who lived only for the moment did it most successfully while being artificially sustained by their parents or a trust fund. The rest have photo albums of their travels all over the world but still have tuition debt from college and credit card debt. O yes, and are less far along in their careers. Not a set of problems I want to have.

I think it’s best to honor both by planning for the future, and living along the way. My uncle said “plan like you’ll live forever, and live like you’ll die tomorrow.” Then he dropped dead the next day. It’s a balance.

"Once you’ve taken care of the basics, there’s very little in this world for which your life is worth deferring." -David Hansson. "It’s not when women are mean or nasty that anything is out of the ordinary. It’s when they are NICE to you that you have to be on high alert..." -Jackinov.

[AwakenedParticipant 35200]

I think “balance” is obtainable, but also different for each Man.

For example, I prefer lower debt to having “experienced” a vacation or ownership of a new whatever whereas some are willing to substantially increase their debt to take a trip of a lifetime.

Balance takes compromise and compromise means NOT getting everything that you want when you want it, and that’s a hard pill to swallow for some Men and just about Impossible for Most Women.

Unless you are independently wealthy with very healthy income streams, LIVING for TODAY usually means that YOU WILL BE PAYING FOR IT FOR MANY TOMORROWS.

What you choose to do today or choose not to do today has a direct impact on the choices that you can make tomorrow.

In a World of Justin Beibers Be a Johnny Cash

[Daryll55Participant 2950]

Stealth wrote:

In high school I asked a random teacher, “Isn’t it better to do the things you WANT to do in life NOW, before you do those things you HAVE to do?” He thought for a moment and replied, actually it’s better to do the things you HAVE to do, so that later you can do whatever you want.

A very good LIFE strategy.

Looking back from approaching forty, I’d say both approaches have their place.
I think it’s best to honor both by planning for the future, and living along the way.

Every day of LIFE is a Gift. Living in this way makes you much more appreciative of life, and how fragile it really is. Enjoy the “Moments in time” LIFE has to offer. ENDURE the hardships of life knowing that there are more good times to come.

The most beautiful beaches look like HELL in a typhoon!

Marry again, Hell NO ! ( Even JESUS was hung on a cross just once)

[harpo-my-“SON”Participant 2410]

My perspective viewpoint is that of a 56 year old slave with no free will who is a caregiver for two disabled women.
A mother and a sister.

Morality and conscience dictates that I must see to the needs of those I love.

When that duty is finished I will be without higher authority over me and only my heavenly fathers will to guide me.
His is a spirit of true freedom.

I was bound to be misunderstood, and I laugh at those who misunderstand me. Kind mockery at the well intentioned, but unfettered cruelty towards those would be prison guards of my creative possibilities. This so as to learn as much from misunderstanding as from understanding. Taking pleasure in worthy opponents and making language fluid and flowing like a river yet pointed and precise as a dagger. Contradicts the socialistic purpose of language and makes for a wonderful linguistic dance, A verbal martial art with constant parries that hone the weapon that is the two edged sword of my mouth.

[SpiderHerderParticipant 3758]

Awakened wrote:

Balance takes compromise and compromise means NOT getting everything that you want when you want it, and that’s a hard pill to swallow for some Men and just about Impossible for Most Women.

Exactly. I think I can say I’ve done both, learned from my mistakes and now doing what I want, while being as wealthy as I’ve ever been. Far from being a millionaire, but I’m not worried about my finances.

I make plans as wisely as possible, weighing the pros and cons, always staying on the safe side, then carry them to completion. That’s what maturity and wisdom do when you live by your principles.

Anyway, sorry if it sounds snobbish or something. lol

[Author]

Posts