New member

[Anonymous 1]

Howdy,

been lurking here for a while since my long marriage (with kids) finally fell apart.

I pretty much gave up on my partner a year or so back as a sort of social experiment – though I didn’t view it as this at the time.

After a couple of years of essentially having to beg for sex, about a year or so back, I thought ‘f~~~ it. Why am I putting myself out for this person who won’t return my intimacy, won’t recognise any of my effort or input to the household, is packing on the pounds (so becoming less attractive anyway), and is constantly whining about her own problems without even noticing any of mine? I don’t need that s~~~!’.

At that point, I decided to spend more and more time doing the things I enjoy.. and screw the consequences. I haven’t withdrawn from the kids, and we have what I think is a good, solid relationship with all of them (with the usual teen angst thrown in). I’ve stayed the course in the family unit mainly to avoid dumping a s~~~ty divorce on them.

So a while back she says ‘I don’t want this relationship anymore’ and effectively walks out. We’re sorting the details out, but I don’t think my ‘ok, off you go’ response is what she expected, and she’s having troubles dealing with it.. and trouble dealing with the fact that despite what she thinks of me, the kids actually like spending time with their dad.

I was doing some idle searching on divorce ins and outs and came across MGTOW.. what a lightbulb moment! The path I had been walking mirrored many of those here.

I’ve moved on — I moved on a long time back, truth be told. I feel for the kids, as they still need parenting, and a separated household isn’t ideal, but I’m enjoying my new life already.

[KeymasterKeymaster]

Nice handle and avatar. Noticed it right away. Great movie too. Thanks for your introduction and pleased to read that you’re relatively upbeat about it, and that you found some positives here.

Anonymous wrote:

the kids actually like spending time with their dad.

This is very common. The ex-wife will often try to poison the kid’s relationship with the father in order to gain favor with them. But it doesn’t garner her any favor. If the father remains grounded , detached from the drama when possible, and is just a good father to his kids, he can have a permanent place in their hearts that can never be replaced or destroyed.

A big welcome to you. Please join in anytime.

If you keep doing what you've always done... you're gonna keep getting what you always got.

[Anonymous 1]

thanks for the quick welcome!

I’m certainly working on the detachment.. but I now realise I detached from the mothership some time back, so have already gone through the pain (unnoticed, of course).

One of the first things I did was wrote down a list of all the fun s~~~ I’d like to do – but hadn’t even bothered raising as a possibility – because it would make her head explode.

I’ll leave those till things settle 🙂

[Sparticus66Participant 508]

Anonymous wrote:

I’ve moved on — I moved on a long time back, truth be told. I feel for the kids, as they still need parenting, and a separated household isn’t ideal, but I’m enjoying my new life already.

I see your point about this and ideally children will be raised in a united household of two sorted people who selflessly attend to each other’s needs. We know how often that happens in marriages right?!
When I lived at home with my boys they witnesses me being a slave to their mother and her mother. That’s not a good way to model a boy into a man. Now they visit my place it’s a man zone. They can do anything there including have a laugh or a cry. But it has games and guitars and films that boys and men live to watch. They see a happier dad and one with more self respect. You can do it. Welcome

[ILiveAgainParticipant]

It seems you’ve turned up with your own self made No Fks Given box.

The lads in carpentry will be very happy.

I think there are millions of men in this world walking this exact same path within marriage.

They just need to look up … that strange light through the fog.

Should he be brave and follow he will come to a door marked ……

WHATEVER THE FK HE WANTS IT TO SAY.

Welcome friend and enjoy real freedom.

[Anonymous 0]

Welcome home, Unforgiven
There are more guys arriving here every day. Pull up a chair and relax.I look forward to your posts.

[Solo MAN’S WisdomParticipant]

Welcome, Unforgiven. Pleasure to have you aboard.

When women lead, destruction is the destination. -- Me.

[DanceMyOwnWayParticipant 2097]

Welcome. Unforgiven is my favourite Eastwood movie. You’ve come to the right place.

If you fall down 7 times, get up 8

[Artboy99Participant 369]

Welcome.

I am a new member to this forum, but like you I have been a MGTOW for a long time. I am happy to hear you have a great relationship with your kids. If I have any regrets it is that I am not a Father for I feel I have much to offer.

[Anonymous 3]

Welcome Unforgiven, you give me some inspiration as I am still in the marriage titanic and I’m thinking about what iceberg to use.

Anonymous wrote:

I’ve moved on — I moved on a long time back, truth be told. I feel for the kids, as they still need parenting, and a separated household isn’t ideal, but I’m enjoying my new life already.

One of my main problems with women is the drama and the bad home environment they create (at least in my case).
So, having a parent with a good house environment is the best we can do for kids.

[BadgerParticipant 2277]

Keymaster wrote:

The ex-wife will often try to poison the kid’s relationship with the father in order to gain favor with them.

That is a discussion that you should consider having with the children right from the start, so they will notice it if it happens and be less affected by it. They will then understand what she is attempting to do.

[PistolPeteParticipant 27143]

I’m glad you joined us! I like your moniker and avatar as well BUT I’m going to buck the system about the movie. If memory serves isn’t Eastwood’s character a big “white-knight” type? Who comes to the aid of a bunch of poor little oppressed whores? Sorry fresh out of sympathy.

If you had to pick an Eastwood movie Any of the first three dirty Harry’s are great, Outlaw J. Wales, Hang’em high (one of my favorites) Joe Kidd, (Just to see a Mauser C96 Broomhandel in action if nothing else—poor Lamar) Hell even Kelly’s Heros; but Unforgiven, too white knight for me.

[FrostByteParticipant 19005]

Welcome
I was divorced from (1st wife) with kids and I made a special point of never berating or bad mouthing their mother. I just told them “It’s your mom you will have to find a way to deal with her” That paid off big time for me. Now that they are in their 30s I will always be seen as the fair and just man who got screwed by their crazy mother.

If you rescue a damsel in distress, all you will get is a distressed damsel.

[JimBoLeaParticipant 1891]

WELCOME TO THE FOLD .

LILITH IS THE HEAD SUCCUBUS AND SHE LIVES ON THE DARK SIDE OF THE MOON

[Anonymous 1]

PistolPete wrote:

I’m glad you joined us! I like your moniker and avatar as well BUT I’m going to buck the system about the movie. If memory serves isn’t Eastwood’s character a big “white-knight” type? Who comes to the aid of a bunch of poor little oppressed whores? Sorry fresh out of sympathy.

I’m not sure about that one – the movie’s a bit too ambiguous for me there. Sure, by all intents he’d done the (extreme bastard) MGTOW thing (outlaw) until the wife came along and settled him down.. but then I saw the revenge on the cowboys as a last-ditch effort to get some cash to set up kids so they weren’t dirt-poor pig farmers. The epilogue pretty much confirms this.

The central theme to me was bad s~~~ will always catch up to you: Munny, Ned Logan, Little Bill, English Bob, the cowboys; nobody comes out clean.

Munny wants a clean kill and exit with the cash — but it all turns sour when his buddy Logan is killed.

[Anonymous 1]

Hey there unforgiven, welcome to the trench, enjoy knowledge.

[Psl47Participant 678]

Nice to see community growing each and every day , welcome dude !

.

[BlakeGuyParticipant 287]

I can’t believe it, just in the last hour, i have read 4 stories hear that are all the same as mine. Yours is another. The play by play is exactly the same. I do not think they even notice.

Let the good times roll

[Author]

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