Need to vent

[Linehauler88Participant 11]

Well I screwed up. Somehow I always manage to get myself into some trouble. Getting married completely changed my fun, energetic, carefree,sexy, girlfriend into the very opposite. That damn conflict diamond must have had some kind of curse put on it to make the purchaser endure a very painfully slow miserable death.

My wife used to be at a good weight, she was never 60 pounds overweight until after the wedding, and everyday from work, it was straight to the couch. The couch gets more ass than me in this marriage. And sure over the 7 years of dating I’ve put on 20 pounds. She put on 60 in less than a year!! Also blowjobs, she used to do that too! Car sex, spontaneous sex not anymore! I almost can’t understand it, she used to really take pride in her looks, and now… there’s practically no effort, unless she’s going out. Then there’s a little. Her woredrobe is something to be disired, she’s 27 and dresses like she’s 57, unlike when we were dating. Everyday there’s a new mess to pick up, her shoes her clothes, glassware, dishes, and hasn’t bothered to do anything around the apartment! We work opposite shifts, I work at night, her work during the day. And after 10 to 12 hours in an 18 wheeler I’m tired and stressed. So I wind down by having a couple beers or so. Apparently that makes me an alcoholic. I am not an alcoholic, alcoholics need a drink… I have one. Also her words are that I am pathetic, a loser, do nothing except fill her bank account with 3 times her weekly paycheck. I do “try” to date her, but it’s kinda tough to try dating a couch cusion. I’ve been told I am stupid, and told to go out and have fun, but I get that (come home NOW) message.

What the hell happened. We used to go out all the time and get shattered! And never once did she tell me that’s my last one. Or slow down, or call me an alcoholic. Instead it was go out, drink, and road head on the way home. We had so much fun going to places and our weekend vacations, now I don’t want to go anywhere with her based on the fact I can’t enjoy myself like I used too.

So I guess I should read this to the marriage conselor next week. I apologize if it’s a long read.

[Solo MAN’S WisdomParticipant]

I’m not sure I would bother with a “counselor”, especially if it’s a female “counselor”. Record every conversation with her. Prepare for the inevitable.

When women lead, destruction is the destination. -- Me.

[BoarParticipant]

Start talking to an attorney NOW. I promise you she is already doing the same.

Staying in the situation will not improve it and will only make you feel worse. No one in society will applaud you for following your wedding vows while everyone will applaud her for getting a divorce.

Start separating your finances, talk to an attorney and document everything

Untamed wrote: Quit complaining and Go Your Own Way in whatever manner suits you best.

[TuneoutParticipant]

Welcome brother,it sounds like you don’t have kids yet,
I agree this is the right time to get out while you can.

Lifes a bitch,but you don't have to marry one!

[Linehauler88Participant 11]

Ya I don’t like an attorney is necessary. No kids (thank the lord) no assets no property.

I have changed my direct deposit to my personal checking account. Being kicked out ( left willing) for having 4 beers, in her eyes she counted 6. There was 4, I counted for her. For smoking a couple of cigarettes out the sliding door I can understand her being angry, but for 4 beers?? Spent a weekend at my brothers place, not too enjoyable. I have came to the conclusion I have to do some serious thinking. A conselor was my idea, maybe hearing that she is in the wrong will be an eye opener, and if not my bags are packed, and I’m currently looking at a storage locker for my stuff, and my tools.

[Linehauler88Participant 11]

Btw, the conselor is a guy. Hopefully there will be a thread of brotheren there. But I have a feeling it will be some political correct liberal douche bag. Either way, I’m 60% out and 40% in. I need to come to terms that she is not the sexy, fun loving, carefree person I knew. She’s different. She’s more like a mother, and I told her I have a mom, I don’t need another. But apparently I don’t do anything right, and I’m a loser who makes 3x what she does in a year. Not that her job isn’t reputable, but I know what I bring to the table.

[BoarParticipant]

Move your stuff before the counselor. Cause guess what? The counselor will say it is your fault simply because you are a male and therefore guilty of all relationship failures.

Try making a bet with yourself. If the counselor says that it is your fault, hire a lawyer (because the counselor’s findings will be used at the divorce). If the counselor says that it is her fault, then move your tools and valuables out anyway because she will destroy them in a rage. If the counselor say it is both your fault, move out immediately because couch cupcake will do everything she can to make it your fault.

Good luck brother…

Untamed wrote: Quit complaining and Go Your Own Way in whatever manner suits you best.

[HitmanParticipant]

Divorce her .
Why prolong the agony.
Only a matter of time.

[Linehauler88Participant 11]

Way ahead of ya on getting my stuff out, looking for a cheap unit.

She’s subburn, but no stupid. She can keep the furniture and bed set, I won’t argue with her on that. We haven’t lived together before marriage, I took a gamble on this, and as a gambling man, I know when to fold. Divorce shouldn’t be an issue. Legal separation may be the way to go, less than a year of marriage, shouldn’t be hard. But I’ll play my cards, and ya recording of everything is key. We’ll call it insurance. And thanks for the luck, I may be needing it.

[Joey AlfioParticipant]

If she’s giving you s~~~ for the stupidest reasons and looking down on you then it’s time to let her go man. it’s simply not healthy for a long term relationship if you’re both at odds. See the counselor first and if that doesn’t work out then it’s time to move on and go your own way.

Δεν υπάρχει τίποτε αδύνατο γι’ αυτόν που θα προσπαθήσει. - Μέγας Αλέξανδρος

[Linehauler88Participant 11]

I get where you’re coming from hitman.

In the old west they’d say “can’t kill man unless you know you ought too.”

I’m playing by those rules. The conselor is my last hand, if it doesn’t work, I fold and find another table. Agony will be there, sure. 7 years with someone is a long time. But if me being miserable is making her miserable, it wouldn’t be right to stay. It’s a 50/50 shot it will work, and if it does then it does. If it doesnt, well then it’s back to the dusty trail for me. There is a friendship between us, and thats what makes it hard. I don’t hate her, but right now it isn’t working.

[Linehauler88Participant 11]

Absolutely joey! Couldn’t agree more, we’ll see the conselor and go from there. Still 60 percent out, and 40 in. And if it doesn’t work, I’m going to vegas or on a cruise.

[pabsawakeParticipant 1761]

Sorry for your troubles bro. But the berating your taking (her calling you pathetic and a loser) will probably not get better. Your story reads all to familiar with many divorced men. The woman praise and love bomb you at first only to knock you off this pedestal. The truth is she probably never meant all that love bombing in the first place.

its intended phyco behavior, build a man up just to knock him down whenever she think he’s not meeting my needs.

Doesn’t look good brother, get your affairs in order and good luck to you.

"You can either love women or understand them, you can't do both". Truth over everything

[HitmanParticipant]

Do the counseling if you must. .at least later after the divorce you know you tried to save the marriage.
I did this and have less guilt. .and less money.
It will work out eventually.
Have some more luck from me too..

[The Manipulated ManParticipant 1856]

Hello LH88,

It is good to have a Trucker join the forums. Truckers are awesome men and their perspective is realistic and hard earned.

I hope you will continue to share your experiences and improve your knowledge of MGTOW.

It is my wish that you can learn from other MGTOWs and avoid learning the hard way.

Working hard and smart is good, but learning the hard way is crap and foolish.

I have consistently chosen to learn the hard way and now I finally understand that there is a better MGTOW way.

Don’t let the following criticisms discourage you from seeking help here at MGTOW.

Your introduction send up some red flags, as I read it.

Linehauler88 wrote:

I should read this to the marriage conselor next week

Wanting to go to counseling to save your marriage is f~~~ed up and it indicates that you are severely ignorant of MGTOW knowledge.

I suggest that you read more of the Forum posts and digest everything in the Archives.

Also, a good “Introduction” should answer the following questions:

Why do you consider yourself MGTOW?

How did you get here?

What has happened to you since you have been reading and listening to MGTOW ideas?

What are your plans to live as a free man?

Yes, your marriage has forced you to take a “Red Pill” and see Woman’s Nature first hand. But, your introduction implies that you are not yet free of blue pill indoctrination.

Even though a lot of guys vent about their s~~~ty lives (as a result of their continued relations~~~s with women) in the MGTOW “Introduction,” most of your “venting” really should be posted in the “Marriage & Divorce” section of the MGTOW forum where you can expect to get some support.

The tough love provided above is to try and guide you to avoid the suffering I went through.

What happens when a man finally comprehends the cold and calculating thoughts that are going through a woman's mind, while her eyes are brimming with tears?

[WarratahParticipant 895]

A lesson that I learned from my former wife is that Marriage Counselling is a VERY important step in the divorce process.
It shows that you ‘tried’ …
So go along with it, LineHauler.
The way your wife is treating you now, do you think that she could magically change and return to what she was when you where first dating?
Or do you think that perhaps the Dating behaviour was all a con and now you’re seeing the real woman behind the mask?
And even if she does, miraculously, change her behaviour and become what you remember her being once again, could you forget what you’ve been through?
I couldn’t.

...And in our own despair, against our will, Comes wisdom to us by the awful grace of God. - Agamemnon; by Aeschylus

[FrostByteParticipant 19005]

Linehauler88 wrote:

Ya I don’t like an attorney is necessary. No kids (thank the lord) no assets no property.

ALIMONY payments. Get a lawyer if you decide to go.

If you rescue a damsel in distress, all you will get is a distressed damsel.

[Chaff/FlareParticipant 3235]

Linehauler88 wrote:

So I guess I should read this to the marriage conselor next week. I apologize if it’s a long read.

Get out now I say. 7 years you are on the cusp of permanent alimony in most states. Have her served now, and go to counseling if you want. If you have kids, there are considerations, but pulling the trigger early is better in my opinion. If no kids, no-brainer.

When you find yourself in the majority, it's time to reflect.

[Linehauler88Participant 11]

The Manipulated Man wrote:

Hello LH88,

It is good to have a Trucker join the forums. Truckers are awesome men and their perspective is realistic and hard earned.

I hope you will continue to share your experiences and improve your knowledge of MGTOW.

It is my wish that you can learn from other MGTOWs and avoid learning the hard way.

Working hard and smart is good, but learning the hard way is crap and foolish.

I have consistently chosen to learn the hard way and now I finally understand that there is a better MGTOW way.

Don’t let the following criticisms discourage you from seeking help here at MGTOW.

Your introduction send up some red flags, as I read it.

Linehauler88 wrote:

I should read this to the marriage conselor next week

Wanting to go to counseling to save your marriage is f~~~ed up and it indicates that you are severely ignorant of MGTOW knowledge.

I suggest that you read more of the Forum posts and digest everything in the Archives.

Also, a good “Introduction” should answer the following questions:

Why do you consider yourself MGTOW?

How did you get here?

What has happened to you since you have been reading and listening to MGTOW ideas?

What are your plans to live as a free man?

Yes, your marriage has forced you to take a “Red Pill” and see Woman’s Nature first hand. But, your introduction implies that you are not yet free of blue pill indoctrination.

Even though a lot of guys vent about their s~~~ty lives (as a result of their continued relations~~~s with women) in the MGTOW “Introduction,” most of your “venting” really should be posted in the “Marriage & Divorce” section of the MGTOW forum where you can expect to get some support.

The tough love provided above is to try and guide you to avoid the suffering I went through.

Thanks for the advice, still kinda learning about mgtow. Not discouraged at all, just wondering if it would be worth it to create a new thread with a proper intro?

[The Manipulated ManParticipant 1856]

Linehauler88 wrote:

Not discouraged at all,

Most Truckers I know are great guys and I can always talk straight with them.

Have you heard about a place that Truckers stay at called Sun Aura in Indiana?

I f~~~ed up when I switched jobs to an Academic setting and now I have to learn how to communicate with a bunch of pussies and rotten c~~~s. Ugh!

It is great to be able to speak plainly with other men. You and your introduction are greatly apprecieated.

Linehauler88 wrote:

just wondering if it would be worth it to create a new thread with a proper intro?

No.

Don’t delete or give up on this Introduction.

It’s fine.

Your intro is actually well written and can help others, especially because of the great advice/ support you got from other MGTOWs.

I would like you to write more about yourself, here in this Introduction.

Think of yourself as a musician in a recording studio doing another “Take” on your first song. I just asked you to tune up your D string. You can now repeat it here as much as you want. We can just consider your first take as Jazz.

You can write about what your life would look like as a MGTOW, without parasites, and being a free man.

Try to answer the questions I brought up earlier.

You are welcome to add as much to this “Introduction” thread as you want, whenever you feel like it.

The Manipulated Man wrote:

Your introduction send up some red flags, as I read it.

Last year another MGTOW called “Tower” wrote that dealing with woman is like playing with a bag full of hand grenades trying to find the ones that won’t blow up.

Tower is able to put into words something that I found out the hard way which is that woman are really very dangerous. You are risking your freedom and a good life whenever you f~~~ around with them. The poster below is from an older culture that understood Woman’s Nature.

Most guys have experienced this or at least understand that woman are dangerous by the time they get to MGTOW.

Your wife is not just a special case. All woman are like that (AWALT).

Linehauler88 wrote:

completely changed my fun, energetic, carefree,sexy, girlfriend

Stuff like this in your Introduction which implied that you still wanted a woman like the one you had before marriage is an example of the Blue Pill stuff that made me think that you haven’t suffered enough yet. It was one of the red flags.

So, try to write in your following replies about the fact that you have learned your lesson and are trying to understand that you are playing with fire (a bag of hand grenades).

You can also start a thread in the “Marriage & Divorce” section of the Forums called “Trucker needs advice on how to divorce the wife.” You will find will a group of MGTOWs to help you who are knowledgeable about Marriage and Divorce. And you can keep adding to that thread with updates and questions throughout your whole divorce process.

What happens when a man finally comprehends the cold and calculating thoughts that are going through a woman's mind, while her eyes are brimming with tears?

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