My Way

[Wildwalker57Participant 107]

Greetings all,
I have been lurking around here for a bit reading stories, and I felt it was time for me to step forward and introduce myself. First some details: I am 43 now, never married, and no kids. I am a free spirit, creator, wanderer, and I have learned to live my life by my own rules, regardless of pressures of family, friends, and society. I will just jump right to the epicenter of the earthquake that rocked my young world and changed everything from that point on.

I had 2 prior girlfriends in my teens, which were puppy-dog love, but I met girl X when I was 19 at a fast food joint. I used to pick up girls just about anywhere, and so I asked her if she needed a ride and she said yes. Drove her home, got her number, and I lost my virginity to her a week later. My prior two relationships were short, with foreplay, but never sealing of the deal.

My relationship with girl X was rocky from the start. She’d constantly push my boundaries from the beginning, like my prior girlfriends, and I wouldn’t stand for it and break it off with her. After I’d break it off, I’d find her outside my window crying in the middle of the night like a lost dog. I would wake up, open the window, she’d crawl in, apologize, and we’d make up all night long. This girl would show up at the craziest of places, and I felt like she was almost stalking me at times. I even moved one time to get away from her, and somehow, she found out where I was living and I found her crying outside the window. The story was always the same. She’d act crazy, I’d break it off, she come back crying, and I took her back. I should have just blown this thing up and kept away from her, but after losing my virginity to her, it was admittedly a lot harder than blowing her off like I did my prior two girlfriends. She was a bit of exhibitionist too, and like to do it in strange places, so she was always keeping things exciting when it came to the sex.

Surprisingly, for several consecutive months things mellowed out and were steady, and before I knew it, our one-year anniversary was just around the corner. This was, has been, and always will be my longest relationship. I later learned, she approached my best friend because she wanted him to DJ our one-year anniversary party. It was supposed to be a surprise for me, so I had no idea about any of this at the time. Well, she and my best friend ended up hooking up while planning for the party. During this time, I was busy with work and school, had no clue, but my gut told me something was up. She was acting different, and I couldn’t put my finger on it. One night I was holding her, and I asked her if she needed to talk to me. When I asked her this, she just started crying in my arms. I knew deep down that wasn’t a good sign, but I didn’t have evidence of anything. Aside from a sour feeling in the pit of my gut, everything was basically as it had been for months. I was working during the day and going to school at night, so I spent all my free time with her. She meanwhile, was seeing my best friend when I was busy.

So our anniversary was only two weeks away, and I had a friend who was going to court on a pretty serious charge. I ended up taking off work to go support him at court. I had a pager at the time. This is before cell phones were popular. My girl knew I was at court supporting my friend. She started paging me over and over again. She was even paging me and calling me names because I wasn’t calling her back right away. She had never ever called me names before. This was new.

Anyway, once I was done at court for the day, I went home and called her. As soon as she picked up the phone, she began screaming at me. This was also new. I caught the first few seconds of her raging, and I hung up the phone on her. I went through my room, packed up all her stuff in a bag, made sure I got it all, and I drove it over to her place. I show up at her door with her stuff, handed it to her, and calmly broke it off. She was like a raging lunatic, screaming a yelling, calling me all kinds of names. I just walked down to my car, got inside, and she tries to stop me by standing in front of my car, pounding on the hood, and screaming at me. I put my car in reverse and got the hell out of there.

This breakup had not been like any other I had ever experienced in my life, and I was certain I wasn’t taking her back no matter what. She had never called me names and acted like a complete psycho before, never. I got the sense she was trying to push me over the edge, so I hit her or something, give her an excuse to be a victim. She was the crazy one, not me. I knew I was done with her. Now you have to remember, I had no idea about her and my best friend, I just broke it off because of her crazy antics. I felt like it was the right thing to do, but there was part of me that missed her from the start. I know that sounds crazy, but she was my first real love, lost my virginity to her, and I was addicted to her like a drug. This was a lesson to log into my brain about sex.

So I get no phone calls or anything, and then about a week later, at 3am, I get a call from the hospital. The people at the hospital tell me she’d been in a bad car wreck, and they couldn’t get in touch with her parents so they called me. I drove to her parent’s house and woke them up. We all went to the hospital together. Turns out, she had fallen asleep behind the wheel and drove her car off a cliff driving down to Mexico. The car caught on fire, she escaped, and was helicopter medivaced to the hospital. When I walked into the room she was in, I hardly recognized her. Her face was as big as a basketball, broken teeth, face gashed up, just a mess. I honestly passed out when I first laid eyes on her, and her father grabbed me from behind and held me up until I could recover my legs again. I had never seen someone busted up like that with my own eyes. It was a bit traumatic for me.

As I am sitting there with her, she’s telling me how much she missed me, all she thought about is me, she wants to get back with me, all that stuff. I didn’t say anything. I was kind of just overwhelmed by everything, and I just listened to her and held her hand. Her parents were a wreck too. Finally, an hour or so later, a nurse comes into the room and says- your boyfriend Z is in hospital Y.

When I heard the boyfriend’s name, my stomach dropped through the floor. I knew it was my best friend. As soon as the nurse announced this, I let go of X’s hand and just shook my head. Her mother took a minute to assimilate all this information, and then she just exploded on her, calling her stupid, a slut, an idiot, a whore, etc. I didn’t need to say a word. I remember I just stood up and told my old girlfriend good luck with your life, I got to go. She cried and said she wanted me back, how could I leave her like this, and I told her she kind of did it to herself. I honestly had strong feelings for her, but I wasn’t going to double-down on stupid. As I walked out, her father, who had always been real quiet and was a pretty scary Vietnam Vet, stopped me in the hallway. He shook my hand, told me he was disgusted by his daughter’s actions, and that I was a good man. I remember I held back my tears, shook his hand, nodded my head, and walked away.

I went to the other hospital where my best friend had been flown to. He was in even worse shape. She had actually saved him from the burning vehicle by pulling him out through the sunroof. Both his legs and his pelvis were shattered in multiple places. His legs were literally still busted open and just had bloody bandages over them. He eventually had to learn to walk all over again. His face too was just a mess. When he saw me, he was absolutely shocked. I even beat his family to the hospital. They didn’t even know yet. With me there, he knew that I had to know what was up. He was all drugged up and told me he did wrong by me, explained everything to me, so I knew the facts now, but said he loved her. I told him that she was all his. I sat with him for about an hour, and then I finally told him I hoped he got better, but I didn’t want to see him ever again. Then, I walked out the door. In the following weeks, I’d get phone calls in the middle of the night where all I heard was crying on the other end of the line. I’d immediately hang up the phone. For me, there is absolutely no reason at all to keep people in your life that betray your trust. It doesn’t matter who they are or how long you’ve known them.

Without question, this was the defining event of my young adulthood, and it changed my approach to women. Before this, I was carefree (ignorant) with women, and I would see girls, chase them, get their numbers, go out on dates. It was all just good fun. After this, I knew sharks were lurking in the shallows, and I needed to start watching where I surfed. As I see it, you either learn lessons in life, or you’ll circle back around and relive them over and over again, oftentimes with bigger and bigger consequences. Actions define people, not their words. My actions were solid through this ordeal. After, I decided I wouldn’t do what I found so painful to others. No one else deserved me crapping on them because I was hurt. At this time, I was still 20 years old and full of testosterone, big burden for a young man. I have found during the process of living life sometimes people step into my life for a moment and then disappear, but like a pebble thrown into a lake, they leave ripples that resonate throughout my life. Enter Tony.

At this time, I was working part-time, and there was a gentleman I worked with named Tony. He was retired, only working the job to make a few extra bucks. Tony took me out one day for lunch, and he asked me a question none of my father, uncles, or other male role models had ever asked me. He asked, “Do you want to have children? Is the desire within you for children?”

I thought about it and honestly told him, “No.”

He then went on to tell me that my answer was OK, and that I would have people in my life tell me that my answer wasn’t OK, but to always remain true to myself. He also told me that since I didn’t want children that there was no reason ever for me to get married. He told me that marriage is not advantageous to a man as it is, but if you don’t want kids, there is no reason at all to ever do it. He then went on to explain to me the pitfalls of women. He explained how they’d stop taking birth-control, hoping I’d knock them up and then try and force me to marry them (I have a cousin who did this to her boyfriend. He left her, and she had the kid. In the family, she’s the victim, and he’s the villain.). Tony also told me to always wear condoms, always, no matter how good it feels without them. He said you don’t want an accident. He then explained how women changed their minds a lot, so even ones that said they didn’t want children too, don’t believe them. He said once their clock starts ticking, they’ll do whatever is in their power to make sure they get a kid (see my cousin above). Tony wasn’t just preaching, he had walked this road his entire life. He was a wellspring of experiential knowledge. This was some of the best advice I ever received in my life. At 20 years old, I felt like the book of wisdom had just been opened up to me. Now, it was up to me to walk in wisdom and keep it in my back pocket, just in case ole Cupid shot me with an arrow.

I eventually began asking myself a serious question in my early 30s, which over time, made things increasingly clear for me. It eventually led to me curbing dating down to nothing altogether. By this time, all my friends were married, and I was the only one single, so I saw plenty of relationships functioning around me up close and personal. I asked myself- Which relationship around me that I KNOW by observation would I exchange my own personal freedom for? When I say know, I don’t mean TV, books, movies, fantasy, none of that. I mean, people I KNOW their relationship, both sides. The answer to this question is ALWAYS the same- None. It isn’t even close. None. I don’t care what the woman looks like either. From my personal observations and experience, once Cupid’s love potion runs out, it’s all downhill from there, and some hills are a lot steeper than others. It’s better to play Isaac Hayes and just Walk on By, rather than getting ran over years later and know you saw all the signs all in advance. I don’t let anyone move my cheese, I just move on deeper into the maze.

I look at the subject of relationships and women as two separate things. I’ve never seen a REAL relationship yet, where I said to myself, “Oh, I would just LOVE to trade places with that guy! He’s so lucky.” Nope. In fact, it is the exact opposite every single time, and I’m patting myself on the back for avoiding them. When it comes to women, I don’t hate them. I have had a couple women in my family that have nurtured and loved me, and I love them in return and have grown from knowing them. All that said, I look at the way they treat their husbands, and we’re back talking about relationships again.

Anyway, a little bit about me as far as other stuff in my life. I left Corporate America at 39 to find my passion and live it. I received such backlash for this, you’d think I robbed a bank or killed someone. I walked around in the dark and searched for answers for six/seven months, and then I finally dug down deep for some courage and faced off against my biggest fear-dragon, writing books and doing art. Love it! The first two years was tough, lost my property, some other stuff, moved around a bit, but whatever. I don’t care about stuff and things. Stuff is replaceable, finding my passion and living it isn’t.

Now, I make some cash with my work, it’s growing all the time. I live in the mountains and go out in my car every day, pull over on roads in the middle of nowhere, and do my books and art on my laptop. I have lost at least 50 lbs since working jobs because I get out of my car, hike in the mountains, and stay fit now. I got more muscle now than I did in my 20s. I spend 99% of my day alone, and I work seven days a week in isolation. I’m pretty close to being a modern-day hermit. I love the mountains and forest during the day and night, the stars are breathtaking.

As far as hobbies go, I meet with a group of men and play Dungeons and Dragons once or twice a month and an occasional board game. That is my socializing for the month. I like to hit a couple baseball games a year too, don’t care what level. I just like the sport, but don’t have time for TV. I’m not much for living vicariously. I’m more like a gladiator. I believe that my life is a precious gift, and it is my job to go out and live it before the book of my life closes. That’s me in a nutshell. I have no regrets, and I hope to continue to live my dream and grow my wisdom while aging gracefully. Thank you for allowing me to participate and tell my story,
Wildwalker57

"It's a trap!" Admiral Ackbar.

[bstoffParticipant 4865]

Wildwalker57. You are my new idol.

Although your red pill moment was sad and tragic,
I’m certain that this is what sparks in the back of your mind whenever you consider the appeal of a woman.

I would say that, in many ways, you’re actually quite fortunate to have had such an experience for what it taught you,
and I’m envious that you had such a smart MGTOW mentor while you were young enough to make use of his wisdom before someone trapped and enslaved you.

I’m glad to hear that you’re a writer, because I’m really looking forward to reading your observations and thoughts here in the forums.

[bladeParticipant]

Welcome bro good to have you aboard

THE PLANTATION HAS NOW TURNED INTO THE KILLING FIELDS . WOMAN ARE NOW ROLLING CAMBODIAN STYLE .

[SimpleParticipant 49]

Welcome!

[AttonParticipant]

You learned before you got seriously burned no pun intended.

A MGTOW is a man who is not a woman's bitch!

[ShineParticipant 1696]

Welcome Walker,

I’ve dodged numerous bullets in the pursuit of happiness, and eventually learned to find it within. F~~~ the programming and never ending expectations.

"Society is to blame" Denton

[AkanbiParticipant 2120]

Wow.

Thank you for sharing your story. It was a good read overall. Kudos to Tony too.

Also, congrats on choosing to do what YOU love and are passionate about against the odds. That is an inspiration for me.

Welcome to the forums, bro.

My brother make you no follow sheeple o. Look them and Go Your Way.

[AbsumoParticipant 51]

Welcome. Glad to have you here Wildwalker57! Enjoy the forums.

[Anonymous 5]

Welcome and thanks for a really great read.
You were very fortunate to have a MGTOW mentor who confirmed what you probably already suspected. It just makes your knowledge from observation so much more real.

Wildwalker57 wrote:

Before this, I was carefree (ignorant) with women

When dealing with women, “Ignorance is bliss”
Another brother on here has a saying that goes “You can either love a woman or understand her, you can’t do both, because once you understand a woman you can’t possibly love her.
But you’re right in pointing out that it’s only in partner relationships that women sociopathically control and exploit men, also work, and whenever there’s money involved.

Wildwalker57 wrote:

In the family, she’s the victim, and he’s the villain.).

Too true. No one dares suggest the truth that women don’t accidentally get pregnant and accidentally keep the baby.
Once a woman manages to get hold of a man’s DNA then he’s owned, it’s all over in society’s eyes. It doesn’t matter how deceitful the woman has been, it’s over. She’s the heroine victim and he’s the heinous villain.

Enjoy the forums brother.

[Wildwalker57Participant 107]

Greetings,
I need to apologize for my delayed response. Up in the mountains where I live, having a cell phone is a good as carrying a rock in your pocket, so I don’t own one. I also don’t log into the internet until after I come home at night, so there will always be a delay.

Next, I would like to thank everyone for the nice welcome and good words. Below, I would like to address a couple of the posts.

bstoff wrote:

I would say that, in many ways, you’re actually quite fortunate to have had such an experience for what it taught you,
and I’m envious that you had such a smart MGTOW mentor while you were young enough to make use of his wisdom before someone trapped and enslaved you.

Thank you for the good words bstoffers. Yes, without question, Tony was like a revelation. The knowledge he gave me was unlike anything I had ever heard. Most of the men in my family don’t talk, they just do, so I never really had anyone articulate any dangers to me. If anything most of the men in my family pull that nonsense- Well, that’s just the way it is. I don’t buy that. I think if you accept crap, you’ll be happily fed it the rest of your life.

I also had front-row seats to my father’s failures with women before I ever met Tony. After my mother and father divorced, I lived with him for a little over a year. After the divorce, he went off the deep end with drinking, and he’d call a handful of women every night and talk to them for hours. I never saw them, didn’t know who they were, but he’d sit on the phone all night with them. Then, in the morning, I would wake and see checks made out for hundreds, sometimes thousands, of dollars to these anonymous women. I would challenge him on these checks and tell him he should hit a strip bar or hooker because he’d at least be getting something in return for his money (I was young). He’d tell me- Sometimes everyone needs a helping hand, son. These checks were every single month, and it would just eat me alive. I think he intentionally left them out on the counter for me to see too.

Eventually, my father’s drinking cost him his job and all his money dried up. He needed a helping hand now, but those women he gave all that money to were gone. He lost everything, his house, lost all his friends, family, everyone… but me. He ended up on the street, was homeless for several years before finally dying of lung cancer at 54. I was there through it all. He lived in a broken-down car behind a bar, and I would see him every couple weeks. Everyone else in my family acted like he was already dead. I got him into a hospice when he was dying (I was in college at the time), and I would visit him most days of the week. About a week before he died, we were watching baseball on TV, and he said words that I locked away inside.

He said: I wish I would have done more.

I don’t know what more was to him, but the better question is- what is more to me? I later used these words to spur my action to leave Corp America and seek out my passion and live it. I figure, if I am going to go down, I will go down swinging for the fences. I learned a lot about life and women by watching my father.

Shine wrote:

Welcome Walker,

I’ve dodged numerous bullets in the pursuit of happiness, and eventually learned to find it within. F~~~ the programming and never ending expectations.

I loved your response! I am totally with you Shin. I’ve dodged bullets as well. Though I had Tony’s book of wisdom, Cupid still shot me with a couple arrows along the way. I spend all my time alone, and when you do that I either think you find a friend inside or you go batty. I’m glad I found my best friend in there. Thanks for your words.

Akanbi wrote:

Also, congrats on choosing to do what YOU love and are passionate about against the odds. That is an inspiration for me.

Thank you Akanbi! I couldn’t possibly explain all the struggles in a few paragraphs. Pursuing my passion has been the toughest fight of my life, but the best fight I could undertake. It requires an amazing amount of real courage (not the bar room kind), an unshakable faith in yourself because it will be tested, and a do-or-die mindset. I had no limit to what I was willing to sacrifice, and this almost landed me homeless at one point. I had a million reasons to turn around, especially the first couple years when I made no money, but I stuck with it because it meant more to me than anything else in the world. It paid me satisfaction, contentment, and fulfillment inside my soul even though it didn’t initially pay me money. I am not out of the woods quite yet, but I am making more and more money all the time now. I love my present tense. I love going out into the mountains and woods and doing my work. It is the first thing I think about when I wake and last thing before I go to sleep. It now defines my life, and I hope it continues to define it into my future.

Anonymous wrote:

You were very fortunate to have a MGTOW mentor who confirmed what you probably already suspected. It just makes your knowledge from observation so much more real.

Thanks Trail428! You are absolutely right. Especially when I was young and not confident in myself. To have Tony confirm all that and then give me solid advice was awesome. I have family members that always use wise quotes and whatnot, but they never walk what they preach. I knew walking Tony’s wisdom was what would make all the difference. My mom and other female family members look down on me, like I am some kind of broken toy, but I am secure in my masculinity and they can pound sand.

Thank you for the welcome, everyone!

"It's a trap!" Admiral Ackbar.

[The Manipulated ManParticipant 1856]

Hello WW57,

I nominate your Introduction as a brilliant example of how to make an Introduction.
My standards are high, and it has been about a year since I made such a claim.
If memory serves me, I think it is called making your Post a “Sticky.”

A good Introduction includes descriptions of Red Pills, lessons learned, and something about your actions as a free men. The goal is for the newcomer to establish his Bonafides as a free man, MGTOW.

Consider you Bonafides well established here.

Many of us here at MGTOW.com are freed slaves and are just enjoying life outside the Plantation. Middle aged guys like me have been through Blue Pill Hell for too long.

Wildwalker57 wrote:

………At 20 years old, I felt like the book of wisdom had just been opened up to me.

Some rare men are born with being able to see “Woman’s Nature.” They are Heterosexual men who are resistant to the charms of women. They have had “Red Pill” awareness, wisdom, and understanding most of their lives.

I have been lucky to know a few personally in my lifetime.

Two are still in my life today and it is great to hang out with them.

They are the real “Unicorns” and they have magical lives.

Wildwalker57 wrote:

My ………. family members………. look down on me, like I am some kind of broken toy……….

Me Too.

Sadly, I allowed that nonsense to influence me in my Twenties and Thirties. All of that time wasted being a “White Knight” and believing in NAWALT is shameful.
Alas, I was chasing “Unicorns” until I turned fifty.

Wildwalker57 wrote:

I wasn’t going to double-down on stupid……

From an examination of my Posts that I have written here for the past year, which can be found by clicking the Forums tab in my Profile, you will find proof that I “doubled down on stupid” in my past dealings with women.

I’m stubborn.

My tenacity is a two edged sword.

My masculine power helps me to make things happen, but I can be unyielding.

That being said, I am proud of my accomplishments.

And I am proud of my failures too.
At least I got up off my ass and did something.

Wildwalker57 wrote:

………..I was addicted to her like a drug. This was a lesson to log into my brain about sex.

That is the curse of Heterosexual men.

And that is my defense for my past “stupidity” with women.

Here is a link to something similar in Nature:

/forums/topic/parasitic-jeweled-wasp/

In my twenties, I was hooked badly and was easily manipulated by women. The Old Timers who tried to warn me about “Woman’s Nature” were ignored. They appeared to be sore losers to me at that time.

Here is a link that attempts to discuss chemistry, an often overlooked aspect of our addiction:

/forums/topic/blue-pill-men-are-really-pheremone-addicts/

Wildwalker57 wrote:

…………….I’m patting myself on the back for avoiding them. When it comes to women, I don’t hate them…………

Me too.

It is like learning situational awareness. It is good to understand what is happening around me.

I am grateful for having a better understanding of “Woman’s Nature,” my MGTOW Brothers, and for the existence of this web site.

Masculinity is the Light of the world.

Femininity is of the Void.

Both have an important role in Nature.

Being jealous is a feminine trait.

As a Masculine Man, I am proud of you for the choices you made, for learning your hard lessons right away, and creating a great life as a free man.

It is always great to meet a man with more B~~~~, Wisdom, and Intelligence than me.

And it is an honor to have you with us in the Forums my Brother.

As a well-established MGTOW, all of the stuff listed in the following Link does not apply to you. I am including it as a contrast for your brilliant Introduction. And your feedback is appreciated:

/forums/topic/list-of-unacceptable-blue-pill-baggage/

What happens when a man finally comprehends the cold and calculating thoughts that are going through a woman's mind, while her eyes are brimming with tears?

[Wildwalker57Participant 107]

Wow!
This post will address The Manipulated Man’s post here. Thank you for all the good words. Good to know I put everything in my Intro. To be fair, I read several other Intros on here, so many of the prior folks who posted were my guide (so thank you all).
As you know, I am a bit of recluse, and I don’t tend to talk to anyone from day-to-day. For example, today, I only spoke to two fishermen for five minutes that I ran into in the forest. Other than that, it was just me all day (and now you). I appreciate your post. Now, I would like to address a couple things you wrote.

The Manipulated Man wrote:

Some rare men are born with being able to see “Woman’s Nature.” They are Heterosexual men who are resistant to the charms of women. They have had “Red Pill” awareness, wisdom, and understanding most of their lives.

I don’t know if I was born with that insight? I had a rough upbringing, and I was telling my mom from an early age I wouldn’t ever have children, etc. I know kids say this kind of stuff though, so… I think if Tony had never entered my life and gave me his knowledge, I would have fallen into DEEPER pitfalls. I do know, after the incident with my best friend and gf, I was already telling myself that I would be single for life, and this is before Tony’s talk with me. I still have a journal from that time where I repeated this refrain. Who knows how things would have worked out though? All I have is the road I’ve walked, and I still had a couple pitfalls. I just intentionally threw a grenade into things up before I got too deep in the mud.

The Manipulated Man wrote:

At least I got up off my ass and did something.

This might have been my favorite quote of your post. I am a strong believer in action, even if it appears to be reckless at times. At times, I have certainly jumped into the fight with the dragon sometimes without my armor on or even my sword in hand. For me, action always trumps words, and I would rather act. I also don’t listen to people, I watch what they do (their acts). I’ve learned if you do this, you’ll see how much people lie to themselves about themselves. Everyone has a narrative about themselves, and a lot of times it’s a myth. If people are lying to themselves, they can never be honest with you about those things either. If you point these inconsistencies out, people will get mad too because you’re violating their myth about themselves. In addition, for me, going out every day and pursuing my passion is love manifest. I don’t need to tell anyone how much I love it because I let my actions speak my words for me. Anyone who watches me from day-to-day knows what I love, solitude, mountains, forest, and my work. That consumes 99% of my time every day.

The Manipulated Man wrote:

It is always great to meet a man with more B~~~~, Wisdom, and Intelligence than me.

Wow, I feel I need to address this. I am strong in my walk, but I would like to emphasize, it is quiet walk. I am a human being and have done stupid things just like everyone else here. I sincerely hope no one has taken my post the wrong way, like I am more intelligent or better than anyone else here. I don’t want to come off that way, so if I have, I apologize. I am strong in my walk, my masculinity, but that has been fired in the forge of life. I appreciate the good words MM, but like a Roman Emperor returning from a victory, you’ll forgive me, if I ignore the praise of folks and listen to the slave in my ear telling me that I am only a man. I like to keep my feet like roots in the ground and my eyes looking up into the heavens.

Thank you for your kind words and post MM, and I will check out the links you offered and reply to the link you posted as well.

"It's a trap!" Admiral Ackbar.

[Jack HarperParticipant 2863]

Helluva story Wildwalker!

[nonameParticipant 746]

Welcome brother,
Gut is our secret weapon, i regret not acting on time (you can not change a woman is a lesson learned).

We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence, then, is not an act, but a habit. - Aristotle
Warrior asked Fear, “How can I defeat you?” Fear replied, “If you don’t do what I say, I have no power.”

[GregB0Participant]

You are truly a recipient of good fortune and are currently living a life many men cannot imagine.

Few people are blessed with learning their life’s passion, fewer still have the opportunity to live it.

You Sir Are doubly Blessed, congratulations.

Thank you for the effort you put into researching MGTOW, as well as your thorough introduction.

I look forward to your future posts and further views on life.

MGTOW membership is free yet the price of admission is often not returned. I am confident that yours threads and posts will benefit all involved.

Welcome Windwalker.

FYI,There are numerous board and former AD&D players on the forum. Look forward to hearing about your campaigns.

​"​My father didn't tell me how to live; he lived, and let me watch him do it.​" - Clarence Buddinton Kelland

[MGTOW@50Participant 225]

Welcome. I enjoyed your intro and comments and look forward to reading more from you.

[PistolPeteParticipant 27143]

Excellent intro; and yes it is a sad story but at least YOU weren’t the one all busted up in the wreck–you dodged a bullet. Glad to read you still play AD&D. I miss it a lot!

[Wildwalker57Participant 107]

Hi folks,
Just wanted to hop back on here and thank everyone for the nice welcome again (Jack Harper, noname, MGTOW@50, PistolPete, GregBO).

PistolPete wrote:

Glad to read you still play AD&D. I miss it a lot!

GregB0 wrote:

FYI,There are numerous board and former AD&D players on the forum. Look forward to hearing about your campaigns.

Wow! I didn’t know there were other D&D gamers on here. That is pretty cool! I grew up on AD&D and then 2nd Ed, but then got out of it for a long time. It wasn’t until I was working Corp America for years and felt I was spinning like water in a toilet bowl into an oblivion of years and would wake up one day wondering what I did with my life that I got back into it. At the time, I was asking a lot of advice from ‘elders’ in my life, people who I respected their opinions. They all kind of gave me the same basic answer, which was I needed to “stay busy”. “Staying busy” amount to anything from joining a club, going to church, playing sports, to getting married and having kids. So I took their advice to a point and started gaming again. I started my own game meetup and then softball meetup too. I was real busy, but no matter how busy I was, it didn’t alleviate the horrible feeling I had in my heart that I was throwing my gift of life away.

Everyone has a starting position. Some peoples’ starting position for instance is Christianity, or atheism, or whatever. Whatever your starting position is acts like glasses which colors your perception of reality. I always start at the starting point that I have been blessed with all the things I need in this life to face all my challenges and finding satisfaction, contentment, and fulfillment is all within my grasp. No one else is required, and though other people in my life at different times spoke down to me like I was “broken”, I never viewed myself as such. I believe I can find MY answers to the riddles of life. If there is emptiness in my soul that means I can find the balm for that. It may require courage and for me to change and evolve, and that is always painful, but I can do it.

That emptiness inside I felt is what drove me to seek answers. In seeking answers, I listened to others to a point and “stayed busy”, but I knew getting married and having some kids would be a mistake. Not my path. After I turned down a big promotion at my job, that really sealed the deal. A year later I finally mustered up the courage, walked into my bosses office, and told her a quit out of the blue.

A lot of people thought I was crazy, but I went on a search, which lasted about six months, and I finally found my passion in life. It hasn’t been without cost, but I’ll accept the costs. Things are replaceable. The way I live my life every day, feeling full inside, feeling like I am a gladiator and stepping into the arena every day, and doing something I love every day- you just can’t put a price on that. I was going through the motions of life before, now I am LIVING life. To me, I FEEL like a man, the man I want to be.

Since then, I started meeting with a new group of guys and playing D&D once or twice a month. We play 5th ed. now. They are a good group of men of mixed ages, a couple in their 50s, me and another guy are in our 40s, and three others are in their 30s. I don’t feel right about forcing my viewpoints on people around me, but I have had a couple of the younger men ask me about marriage. I have had the pleasure of passing on Tony’s wisdom, and the things I have learned as well. As the saying goes, you can lead a horse to water, but you can’t make him drink.

GregB0 wrote:

You Sir Are doubly Blessed, congratulations.

Thank you! You know, I don’t want to sound arrogant, but I KNOW what you’re saying is the truth. I feel it every single day. When you do what you love, nothing in the world beats it, nothing. I also remember waking up and going to jobs I hated, and I tried to convince myself they weren’t that bad, I took pride in them, and I had to do them because I needed the money. I sold myself on so much nonsense then, and it was all constructed around fear.

I decided it was better I faced the dragon and die today, than die hundreds of tomorrows slaying myself every single day by breaking my own spirit. I was like a wild stallion caging myself. I didn’t make a very good Roman in the end though. I decided there were dragons out there in the world that my sword worked so much better on rather than myself. I’m not out of the woods yet with my path. I struggle financially, have a ton of debt, etc, but I live with more freedom, happiness, and joy in my life now than I ever had before. Even if I live a shorter life because I get eaten by the random bear in the woods or something like that, at least I will have died knowing I was doing what I loved, following my dream, and feel more complete inside than I have ever felt in my entire life. I know where the shore is now. There is a quote I love, and I use it to live by.

Confucius says- The Man who says he can, and the man who says he can not.. Are both correct.

My addendum- ALWAYS, always, always, say you can, and then go do it!

"It's a trap!" Admiral Ackbar.

[mystoryParticipant 370]

Wildwalker57 wrote:

I am only a man

Not all men are equal. You know that.
Nobody here thinks you’re being smug or boastful.
Quite the contrary.
This site is one of the few platforms where a MGHOW may act and speak freely. It’s definitely a feminine trait to not feel gratitude and inspiration when met by a being who treads the path of The Fool, which is to let folly work to one’s advantage.
Welcome home, good sir

I don't need a legacy.. I don't need a monument.

[mystoryParticipant 370]

You’d mentioned a need for a glossary somewhere. Here it is
Glossary

I don't need a legacy.. I don't need a monument.

[Author]

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