My story, from 17 years old from 25 (now).

[skillastatParticipant 2]

Hello, I discovered Sandman yesterday night at around 10pm and here we are this morning 8am. Around 10 hours of watching his videos, and looking at this site so here I am. I wanted to share my story maybe it could be a kind of a relief…. I don’t know.

At first I’ll have to say my English is probably not perfect. My first language is french but I understand and speak very well in English. For that I am sorry in advance.

I just turned 25 years old this month. I am a french Canadian, from Quebec, in a suburban on the south shore of Montreal City.

Today I’m stuggleing in life because of court cases, wich I faced falses accusations 3 times since my 19 years old. I’m basically at the bottom of the barrel right now. Just writing this is making me shake, sweat and smoking cigarettes one after the other. I don’t know where I am in life and why this is happening to me. Today I don’t see anybody, I lost my self-confidence, I probably lost hope and I think all the videos and the explanations on womens I saw in Sandman’s videos are fitting me perfectly. This is why today I want to be perfectly honest with all of you and if this message can help someone somewhere, I’ll be glad.

My story begins with my first love, when I was 17 years old, 8 years ago. I met her at a group who teached us multimedia with photoshop and flash. Right when I saw her I knew that would be something magical. So I asked her for a date and 10 days later she became my first girlfriend. For me it was truly a turning in my life, pushing away all my teenages issues like a drug addict mother and a not caring workaholic father. My parents broke up when I was 8.

At that time I was living with my drug addict mother and my father-in-law at that time who was probably the one who dragged my mother into this after she left my father. Very shortly after meeting my girlfriend, my mother lost her appartment and went to psychotherapy. So I went living with my grand-mother. As you would probably guess there was no way I could invite my girlfriend to sleep. So then I was thinking what I could do to improve my life-style from then on. My father is an owner of a taxi cab company, but it’s special I’ll relate soon about this.

I left high school at the age of 16 because of family issue. Not because I didn’t liked it, or because I wasn’t good at school. I had a big problem to focus when at school. I usually ended up having great scores without really studying a lot. I’m an intellectual, computer geek and gamer but this is only to put you a little in perspective of who I am. I was not really a sport guy but I was going outside doing skateboardings and seeing friends as well as keeping doing my interests at home.

So when I turned 18 I went to pass my taxi cab license, since I could now work for my father. I thought that was perfect and I could see my girlfriend more often. I could buy a car, take her to a date and you know the deal. This is what happened but in a special way. My father’s taxi company is not like the ones you could experience in other cities like Montreal where the drivers always have to be to a certain given place, either waiting for a call of going on duty. My father’s business is more people-related: They call at the phone, then my father calls me back. When I had no calls I could go where I wanted but when he calls me it’s business time. While I had the brilliant idea to bring my girlfriend with me and knowing nothing about girls nature, I began to spend a lot of this money on ourselves. Everyday, we ate on the fly at fast foods for 2, smoking cigarettes for 2, I even rented for about 7000$ of motel rooms. Since my father wanted me to work 7 days a week, 12 hours in night time, I couldn’t do other things but this to keep my girl loving me. Because yes I thought that was the perfect idea to have her with me in front of the mini-van, while clients sitted on the back. This generated a lot of issues but I rolled that way for about 1 year. Despite all what my father was telling me about not bringing my girlfriend, that this is a job and I can’t do this.

I was doing it anyway, I was in love.

That until a day my father had enough and fired me (and I can’t blame him of it), this is where the things became to crush down for me.

It was in 2008-2009 I had spared a very little amount of money so I took an appartment why my girlfriend. It was in her childhood, another suburban but farther from where everyone I knew lived. It was quite bizarre but hey, I was in company of the girl I loved so what could stop me ? After a couple of months on social help, and barely surviving, I found a s~~~ty job as dishes cleaner in a really busy restaurant.

The thing is that at a certain point I had been contacted by people in that city on facebook and they were telling me that my girlfriend was cheating on me. At first I couldn’t believe it but deep inside me I knew she was a lier. When her sister told me the truth I couldn’t even sleep beside her, my girlfriend that I had spent 2 years with her, giving her all of my attention and money. Then one night I was driking and kinda loosed patience. I grabbed my girlfriend to the shoulders and because I was drunk she yelled and was supposely scared. That made noises and the neighboor where the walls were zero isolated heard it and called the police. Here don’t get me wrong, I never hit her, I never hitted a women and will never do.

I went to the police station, signed a drunk bail where I pledged not to go back to my appartment. I called a friend and I got there as a complete idiot willing to negociate and ask her why she wrote paper against me. I went back where all my life, my stuff and my hopes were. But then again the police came back because of routine to check up and it was done I was going to the jail.

I was 19 years old, completely ignorant of the system I stepped into. I was afraid of my situation, will people think I hit her while I just grabbed her, why is she doing this to me ? All those questions for about 5 days spent in jail. Then when I met a lawyer I tryed to call my father to ask him what to do and he told me to deal with the lawyer.

So I took the deal, plead guilty and I was out.

This was my first biggest mistake in life.

When I got out of jail I talked to my girlfriend on the phone, and SHE WAS CRYING ON THE PHONE TO MAKE ME COME BACK. Why after signing a paper against me I would go back there ?

I went to my father, and asking him to take me back. I was destroyed. At that moment I didn’t even had a room in his appartment, I was living on the couch. My heart was broken, I had lost my girlfriend and had a false guilt on my law folder.

Then my father asked me to come back to his taxi business but only 5 nights a week. I said yes, even with all my flash-backs of me and her rolling in the night streets. I was sad, but I was making money. This money however was spent on some kinds of reliefs, smoking marijuanna, going drunk when I wasn’t working. Then after a couple of months I met another girl. She was my friend at the begining but I started to feel some kinds of love into her because she was rolling with me sometimes in my taxi cab, reminding me of my ex.

As she was a speed drug addict, I became to step into that world. I don’t know what I was doing, my sadness became to lift a little and I thought maybe I had a chance with this girl. Wrong. All she wanted is use me, even when she got kicked out of her family house I invited her to sleep on my couch while I was laying on the ground.

All of this in about 2 months after meeting her, without trying anything creep on her, being a nice guy, giving her food, giving her what she wanted because I had money and giving her a place to sleep. I had bought a car so we could venture on anywhere while on my days off. As she had her temporary license I could show her how to drive a car. At that time I was 20 years old and she was 18.

This was my second biggest mistake in life.

So one day while we were driving on a high-way, she did a crazy maneuver and I remember yelling at her “What are you doing ?!” then she pulled on the edge of the road and she started to be hysterical and punched me like 10 times in the face while I didn’t responded. This was turn-off for me and I don’t wanted to have anything to do with this girl no more. I gently drove her back to her family house where she was kicked out.

The next day I received a visit of 2 police women telling me I had to face multiple accusations. Accusations of what ? sequestration, bashing her, etc….

I was telling myself it’s impossible I’m not gonna let her falsely accuse me like that. It turned out that the court wasn’t scheduled for about 2 years after that moment. From that moment I really began to crumble on myself, waiting on that day and not knowing what’s gonna be the verdict because I previously had a guilt in my law folder. I think from that very moment I began to experience a depression. I stopped working for my father, I drunk all my left money. I even lost my car because I left it in a school parking and the battery went off and I had no money to move it out.

1 year and a half later, I reached 22 years old. Still no court in sight, I began to feel a little better with time but still these memories of betrayal were still in me and I couldn’t really work as a normal citizen. What I mean by that is I had no really goals, I didn’t wanted to work, I was down the bottom.

But then again, I met another girl. My second girlfriend. At first we were just friends but came a time where I made the step and kissed her. She, I think, was the love of my life. I still think so, but I lost her and I’ll tell you why. As I previously said I had 3 falses accusations and she wasn’t one of the people who did it.

Then I started back to see good in life, I was a new man. I really was, I had so much for me. This girl was wonderful. So I started back to work for my father.

I was even so confident that she was the one that I took an appartment with her because I still lived on the couch at my father’s appartment and you know, motel rooms are expensive. So I worked hard, while providing for everything she needed. Despite she had some problems in where she was in life I told her I was to help her. I did all the necessary for that new appartment. New paint, cleaning everything, I even bought her a cat so she don’t feel alone while I was doing taxi duty. I brought her with me in my taxi sometimes but not all the time.

At some point my father was in vacation, I was doing the boss job. Answering the calls and doing all the administrations, giving job to the other drivers while doing the main job even.

But one night, I answered a call. Some drunk ladie wanted me to go pick her up with her car at a bar so I needed someone with a normal license driver to come with me as my other taxi drivers were busy elsewhere on taxi duty. So I went there with a friend. He picked up the car and the lady got with him in her car while I was following them. We had a direction to take but when I was following them I saw my friend take up the wrong road so then I flashed up my lights and he got to the edge of the road then we talked…..

I said to the drunk lady that if she were going to go elsewhere from where we were supposed to go, it’ll cost an extra more. Then she started to act hysterical, telling us names and giving me half of what the price was showing on the taxi meter. I acted gently and I was telling her that she can’t take her car drunk as she was. She took her car anyway and my friend came back to my taxi cab so I told her that I was obligated to call the police because she was drunk-driving.

This was my third biggest mistake in my life.

I followed her with the cops on the phone. the cops got her drunk-driving and I went back to my normal taxi duty even if I was a little stressed. I wouldn’t let that take off my happiness of being with my new girlfriend and moving into that new appartment.

About 1 month later police went to me and they said me that this drunk women was putting charges on me. They took me to jail, they took me away from my new girlfriend, from my new appartment. I spent about 7 days in jail. I knew that I did nothing wrong but the cour told me that I had previous accusations and I couldn’t do my job anymore.

But when I came out of jail my girlfriend jumped in my arms and kissed me like she was really in love and knew I had nothing to do with this. So I started to say to myself that I will defend myself in court and I was confident. I still had the support of my love, I still COULD do something.

A month passed, I started some new random jobs that I didn’t liked. My liberations conditions were to not drive any vehicle and be at home at 9pm. Slowly my relationship with my girlfriend started to scale down dramatically. As I couldn’t provide money and I started to be weakened by all those accusations. I needed emotionnal support more than ever but my girlfriend preferred to go out after 9pm, and meet some new friends and eventually meet another boy.

Then I really started to feel depression and I even tryed to suicide myself.

Even tho I knew I had nothing to do with these falses accusations I had the feeling that the entire world was against me. Why in the world could that happen to me ? I always been the nice, caring guy…..

Months passed, I eventually dropped my relationship because anyway she wasn’t there for me. She still lived with me for a short time. We still were intimate, it is if as she never really wanted that to happen. But she’s a girl, she wants to be taken out for dates and receive gifts. And I knew she was seeing another guy EVEN if she were still f~~~ing with me…

Then I was there, alone, waiting for my court to arrive. I began to feel like a mental torture. This was really hard to endure. I enventually lost my appartment because I wasn’t paying my bills anymore. I came back to my father’s appartment but this time I had a room since my sister finally left the place. But my father wasn’t helpful at all, he never tryed at any point to suggest me a real lawyer. I had to rely on a cheap lawyer paid by the government “officially assigned”.

I was down the barrel, and the edges were high. My court passed on febuary 2014, when I was 24 years old. My officially assigned lawyer told me that I had nearly no chances of getting out of this because my credibility was zero in face of the judge because of my previous accusations. All my cases were in front of me at the same time. Then my lawyer asked me a deal I could take. No taxi for the next 5 years, 200 hours of community work and a monthly meeting with a probation officer for the next year and a half. That drunk lady could get back her driving license as she was “fleeing” from me.

I couldn’t endure more stress, it was far beyond my capacity. I was literally going to fall under my own weight. I felt heavy and depressed. I felt tortured.

So I agreed to the deal, letting my courage aside. Even tho, I never mistreated a women a single time in my life.

And here I am, a year later after my court passed. I still have struggle living with this. Should I go back to that with money and a real lawyer ? What I can do now ? I’m lost in this life, I lost everything. I didn’t even started a quarter of a century yet that I feel I could die tomorrow and that would make no difference to this world.

I was betrayed, abused and womens took advantages of me at every single point in my life.

I’m joining this movement and telling you today my story to maybe…. maybe prevent these kinds of things to happen to anyone else in the future. But I’m trying my best right now just to survive this. Maybe if I hadn’t spent all that money on these girls I could defend myself in court. Maybe if I took my courage in my hands I could have been acquitted in court.

I don’t deserve this and I know it. I saw back my first girlfriend for the first time 4 years later we broke up and we banged on new year’s eve 2014. I saw back the girl that did my 2nd false accusations and she asked me pardon. And I had rumours lately that the drunk women who did my 3rd false accusation that she is a crack dealer.

I think womens are overly protected by the laws and automatically the man is to blame.

Thanks for reading………… It was a pain remembering me this but maybe also a relief in some kind, of sharing this to you.

[Some edits for spelling mistakes]

[Smitty the Great OneParticipant 1535]

Holy Crap dude, you need to stay away from women for a while. This is the place to get your s~~~ together…

Life is too long to play by someone elses rules....

[floartyParticipant 17]

Wow .. sh*t dude that’s a horrific story

I hope you get all well now after entering the red pill world

[TheNinjaUWannaH8Participant 386]

Holy Shiet!

That’s Fricken Horrible!

Yeah Man….You should chill on the Females for a second and recenter.   For Real, doe.

[BrainPilotParticipant 7640]

Welcome to mgtow Skill’…
You’ve come to the right place. I’m an anesthesiologist and reading your story, the first thing notable to me is that your mother was a drug addict. The drugs she was likely addicted to can have some useful medical purposes. But once people use them enough for non-medical purposes to become addicted to them, they create a form of insanity for the addict that damages their thinking, their behavior and their relationships. It is enormously damaging to their children. Having a drug addict mother a set up for a man. By set up, I mean it can make you a target for the worst behavior of the worst women, and you won’t really see it coming. A normal, healthy mother would probably have given you different preferences for women and have made your life so far a very different experience than what you’ve had. You can’t change the mother you had, but you can change the effect that it had on you where women are concerned.

It is helpful that you are starting to see that women are generally not the answer to many problems, but can be the source of all kinds of problems. The information in the sandman videos is correct in the assessment that government and courts are unfairly in favor of women. And it’s probably very good advice that you stay away from them for a while (a few years at at least) because your preferences in women so far have not been good ones. Where you are, there may not even be any good ones left to choose from…but this is all the more reason to stay away from them for a while.

When you can, as soon as you can, do some internet reading about the effects on adult children who have grown up with a drug addict parent. Once you start to recognize the effects, it’ll be easier to recover from them. When you have finished reading all you can on mgtow, google adult children of drug addicts or adult children of alcoholics. There may be more written about adult children of alcoholics, but the effects are essentially the same. It’s important to read about these effects because when they happen, it’s at a time when kids aren’t really old enough to realize they are happening. Basically, having an addict parent can create a little bit of insanity for everyone else in the house with them. It’s important to know how that works so that it can addressed and recovered from…

Stay strong buddy. You’re life is not over, and it’s too early to give up on it.

Look, it's not my fault that tornado dropped a house on your sister. Now get back on your broom and get your ass out of here... and take your monkeys with you

[GabrielVACHEVParticipant -1]

Wow ! After everything you came through, the phrase “I have never mistreated a woman” kind of loses it’s sense to me. Why shall a person be proud of “never mistreating a woman” after a story like that ? To me “I’ve never mistreated a woman” sounds like “I’ve never punished evil”, which is not a thing to be proud. Anyways, these are my first thoughts after reading your story.

Now I’m sure you’ve extracted a lesson from all you experienced, but my advice to you, brother, is to take your time, avoid contacts with women as much as possible and reconsider what you are to do with your future. This means to become a social “ghost”.

You also mentioned Sandman. Honestly, he is my personal favourite. I watch his videos on daily basis and have educated myself through them very much. He has enormously rich content so I believe he’ll be very usefull to you. I really want to know that you take a “healthy dose of red pills” regularly and I’m sure your life and emotional state will improve. Time cures; all you need now is patience.

Thats my comment on your case, brother. Wiss you all best and cheers !

[skillastatParticipant 2]

Thanks for these comments and yes I really see today the impacts on me that womens had. As for long I thought I was the problem.

I took the red pill for sure.

Today I feel like a new man.

Thanks MGTOW

[…Spectator 1165]

skillastat: welcome bro. you are amongst the smartest men on the planet. have fun!

[AussieBlokeParticipant 144]

Skillastat, I kind of feel a little ashamed of myself for complaining about my situation after hearing your story.

Yours is by far the most horrific chain of events I have come across, I wish you all the strength and patience in the world  to help you get to be the man you want to be.

 

AussieBloke

 

The harder the fight the sweeter the victory

[skillastatParticipant 2]

Thanks all for wishing me luck

AussieBloke no need of being ashamed, I know my story is horrible but everyone have their own and it’s inhuman to have to go through this.

All is important now is we give the red pill to as much as possible mens.

[Anonymous 42]

@skillastat  This is a great place to fill your pocket with RED PILLS and then go pass them out! It’s like a schoolyard and you’r the kid with jelly-beans!

Glad to see you’re motivated!

Gotta go, there a blizzard out-side, It’s starting to bluster, hope I don’t loose power….

[Author]

Posts