Hi Guys, another one from Australia here. Here is the short version of my story. I met an amazing woman several years ago, everything just clicked. She came from a large family and I was readily accepted into the family. I really enjoyed spending time with them and they made my life better. We discussed having a child and after seeing her with all of her nephews and nieces, I expected her to be a great mother. I was encouraged to do all of the things that I enjoyed doing before we met and knew that when the baby arrived that my responsibility would her the baby and her. I was ready to be a Dad and was looking forward to it. We had a son and I wont’ go into what that does to you, that is well documented (elation, joy, fear, trepidation etc).
We decided to have a second child. Everything was amazing. We were learning and growing together with the shared responsibility of parenting. We had a second son. I could not have been happier.
Then there was a flick of the switch. Within two weeks of the birth I got “We will never be having sex ever again” “I have no interest in anything you say or do” “Everything you do is wrong or not good enough”
Everything I did was condemned. I was told off for changing a nappy out of sequence and even old off for wiping my arse the wrong way !!!. I was told never to even touch her again. I used to try and give her a kiss before going to work and was met with an angry “Get away from me”. This was in front of my kids and one day my eldest said that to me when I went to kiss him goodbye before going to work. I was crushed.
Her mother got cancer and fought a brave fight for some time. I was told “Why can’t your mother get cancer and die, not mine”. Her mother was a great woman and shortly after we sat down at the funeral she got up and moved away from me. This was commented on by several people later.
When I tried to talk to her about our issues I was told “That is the way it is and if you don’t like it I will leave and take the kids”.
I would come home from work and try to initiate a conversation with her and there was no recognition that I was even in the room.
I went without sex or any contact for 3 years. She would often ask if I had met anyone else. When it became apparent that I was not going to have an affair and therefore be the bad guy, the verbal abuse really started. “F~~~ off you c~~~”, “You lazy f~~~”, You useless f~~~”.
On the one occasion I asked her not to speak to me like that, she walked. I lost my house and my kids.
This is by no means an exhaustive account but by now you get the drift. Weeks of no sleep ensued.
During the relationship I had organised for us to see Councillors. They saw straight through her and when they did she refused to go anymore. I asked for help from her family and friends, who did nothing. I have no doubt that I was used in order for her to have children and then discarded when the time was right.
I love my boys dearly and will always be there for them anyway required. I miss them dearly and crave to hear their voices, hold their hands, share a moment with them, tuck them into bed and watch them sleep.
My priority now is to be a great Dad. I can do that now without the toxic influence of their mother. I have a journal that I document what we do together and how I feel about them. When the poisoning starts and when the time is right, the boys will get that journal. I am getting help and am classified as a victim of domestic violence and am treated that way by the Councillors.
MGTOW has provided some clarity for me. I am lucky, I do not harbour anger. I view anger as debilitating and it will only ruin my life and cloud my decisions regarding my boys. I have lost, no doubt, but I have also gained. I am at peace and will pursue what makes me happy and I will do that in the absence of all women. I don’t hate women, far from it, I just choose to having nothing to do with them, other than socially platonic or work.
As I said, I haven’t had sex now for over three years. I am 44 years old and I don’t miss it. This makes my choices easier.
Thank you for what I have discovered so far.
… 5 years ago.
