My Son Wants to Live With Me Full Time

[Soldier-MedicParticipant 2566]

I have joint custody of my two youngest sons. Two weeks ago, my 13 year old son asked me to seek full custody.

I have been waiting for this because I wanted him to arrive to this decision on his own.

I am deliberately crafting my case. I realize that he is a teenager and can talk to a judge and be taken seriously. However, my ex has an extensive past history of lies and manipulation. I also believe that the loss of control that she will have over his life will drive her up the walls. She is quite literally capable of making any noise and excreting any fluid that she thinks will convince someone of her own heroic martyrdom.

`1. Yesterday was the first appointment with psychologist. Establishing a case that my son is stable and is in his right mind and has the ability to arrive at this decision on his own and has done so without influence. Counselor has already agreed to testify.

2. First appointment with attorney is next week. This is the same attorney that won joint custody for me.

Problem: Still have 11 year old son that thinks the sun rises and sets over his mother because she caters to him. Washes and folds his clothes. Treats him like the super-special boy that he is. He has mild, and I mean mild ADHD, and mild dyslexia. Dyslexia runs on my side of the family.

I believe that my youngest is still too emotionally attached to his mother. So much so that separating him from his mother will do more harm than good. My 13 year old son arrived to the same conclusion when I asked him what he thought.

I don’t plan on going in front of a judge immediately unless he comes home with a black eye. I want to establish a solid case.

I welcome thoughts and ideas.

"I asked you a question. I didn't ask you to repeat what the voices in you head are telling you" ~ Me. ........Yes I'm still angry.

[FrostByteParticipant 19005]

I wish I had advice. I can only wish you good luck. It sounds like you are doing all you can.

If you rescue a damsel in distress, all you will get is a distressed damsel.

[DorkShitParticipant 4353]

Best to stay the course as originally defined.

Explain to the older son that he needs to be there to support his younger brother.

I know what you want but it has a certain unreasonable aspect. A child sees thru a child’s lens.

The idea that a child dictates what they want is sketchy rational thinking. It is fine if they want to be with you but what if the child wanted to only be with his mom?

This is why this kind of custody issue should be the responsibility of an adult.

Trust me, I didn’t want to hear this from my father back in the day. But, my father was right.

Peace brothers

[Chaff/FlareParticipant 3235]

Soldier-Medic wrote:

I have joint custody of my two youngest sons. Two weeks ago, my 13 year old son asked me to seek full custody.

I have been waiting for this because I wanted him to arrive to this decision on his own.

I am deliberately crafting my case. I realize that he is a teenager and can talk to a judge and be taken seriously. However, my ex has an extensive past history of lies and manipulation. I also believe that the loss of control that she will have over his life will drive her up the walls. She is quite literally capable of making any noise and excreting any fluid that she thinks will convince someone of her own heroic martyrdom.

`1. Yesterday was the first appointment with psychologist. Establishing a case that my son is stable and is in his right mind and has the ability to arrive at this decision on his own and has done so without influence. Counselor has already agreed to testify.

2. First appointment with attorney is next week. This is the same attorney that won joint custody for me.

Problem: Still have 11 year old son that thinks the sun rises and sets over his mother because she caters to him. Washes and folds his clothes. Treats him like the super-special boy that he is. He has mild, and I mean mild ADHD, and mild dyslexia. Dyslexia runs on my side of the family.

I believe that my youngest is still too emotionally attached to his mother. So much so that separating him from his mother will do more harm than good. My 13 year old son arrived to the same conclusion when I asked him what he thought.

I don’t plan on going in front of a judge immediately unless he comes home with a black eye. I want to establish a solid case.

I welcome thoughts and ideas.

First off, and don’t get p~~~ed, I personally think ADHD is bulls~~~. Find a hill by your house, name it Ridallin hill, use as necessary.

Second, maximize your time with your babies. People talk about quality time. I think quality time is bulls~~~ too. Quantity time is what you want. Kids need to se how you react to:

Them burning chicken
You not having toilet paper
Teaching them how to cook
Frustrations
Love

All the everyday things. That is where the learning happens and the love is firtilized for the long term.

How you do that in your situation is too complex for me to understand not knowing everything. All I can say is fight for quantity, and if your kid is asking for it, DO NOT let him down. Peace

When you find yourself in the majority, it's time to reflect.

[Anonymous 42]

Take him fishing and hunting, start molding him in spite of who has custody, conspire with him to keep the hunting a secret if his mother is a gun grabbing nazi! Teach him mutual male cooperation against female domination.
Teach him the ropes.

The spoiled momma’s boy may be sucking tit until he’s 30!

Ya win some, ya loose some….

[Anonymous 54]

I dont have kids so my opinion aint worth a s~~~. But my first thought is, would it be difficult for the boys to be seperated. Glad Im not a parent.

[TaxGuyParticipant]

Anonymous wrote:

I dont have kids so my opinion aint worth a s~~~. But my first thought is, would it be difficult for the boys to be seperated. Glad Im not a parent.

I am a parent, and that was my first thought as well. Good luck Medic, I wish had advice to offer you more than just keep loving your kids. But that one you already know.

Order the good wine

[Soldier-MedicParticipant 2566]

Chaff/Flare wrote:

First off, and don’t get p~~~ed, I personally think ADHD is bulls~~~. Find a hill by your house, name it Ridallin hill, use as necessary.

I agree that its bulls~~~. This is coming from someone that has a bachelor’s in psychology. He is a hyper young man. I make him run around the block when I have had enough.

Ritalin hill. I love it. I think I’m going to start telling him to take an Adderall. This will become the euphemism for taking a lap.

"I asked you a question. I didn't ask you to repeat what the voices in you head are telling you" ~ Me. ........Yes I'm still angry.

[Jan SobieskiParticipant 28791]

He will follow the older brother, in time.

Triage. Save what you can.

Be firm but loving. Men want leadership. Men form hierarchies.

Teach him things. Show him how to change a tire. Then give him the privillage of changing a tire. Let him practice.

He will tell the young one that dad taught me how to change a tire and dad trusts Me to change his tire.

Dad taught me and trusts me. Make him earn the privilege.

Make him earn your respect and then give it. You will be a god to him. The young one will crave to change a tire.

Love is just alimony waiting to happen. Visit mgtow.com.

[Chaff/FlareParticipant 3235]

Jan, f~~~ing beautiful.

When you find yourself in the majority, it's time to reflect.

[Chaff/FlareParticipant 3235]

Anonymous wrote:

I dont have kids so my opinion aint worth a s~~~.

I FINALLY FOUND YOU F~~~ER!!!!!!!!!!!YOU THOUGHT YOU COULD HIDE FROM ME!!!!!!!!!!!!
I NEED HELP, and this boy needs a dad?????
NNOW PAY UP F~~~ER!!!!!!!I FOUND YOU!!!!!THE BIRD GAVE IT

When you find yourself in the majority, it's time to reflect.

[Chaff/FlareParticipant 3235]

AWAY!!!!!!!!
AAAAAAAA, DONT TOUCH ME!!!!!!!!!!!!

Bitch, get off my computer

When you find yourself in the majority, it's time to reflect.

[StandUpGuyParticipant 334]

You are on the right track my friend. Let the older boy set the example.

My advice is not to take this as a fight but rather as a natural progression; act like it is very normal; a young teen needs his dad that is all.

[GrumpyParticipant]

@ Chaff/Flare

You’re f~~~ing killing me… lol

There was a time in my life when I gave a fuck. Now you have to pay ME for it

[GrumpyParticipant]

One avenue of approach is a trial run at living full time with you. This may be an acceptable compromise for the mother (just thinking about minimizing your stress/drama with her is all). Sometimes this works in a mans advantage with the courts.

Get the routine down, start on the “new program” with you, have an unbiased professional monitor his progress (mind you they are automatically biased to what ever side sets up and pays them).

You literally will have to develop a whole new relationship with your sons. due to separate households

Just a thought to run with S-M

There was a time in my life when I gave a fuck. Now you have to pay ME for it

[Savage WillParticipant 181]

Involve your younger son before he gets older. It’ll be harder for him to get used to a man’s way of living later on. I was somewhat like the younger one. only son in the family and divorced parents except my mom won custody over me and my sister. Start by neutral activities till you get some of his confidence. your older son might be useful for that. take him fishing hiking or on road trips w/t the mther. memories like that will be very important like that later on for him. im 23 now and it took me nearly a decade of intense psychological and emotional ordeal to get out of my mind and see the world for what it is.. my mom and sister wud say nice words about me and bad ones about my dad when i was much younger. they put me in an ego trip. dont let that happen to your son. they put me in a loop. later on i realised that actually, my dad’s a respected man and he’s a fighter by heart. the only ones saying bad stuff about him were my mom and my sis and some of our female relatives.
I hope you get custody over your second son. God bless

Don't fucking tell me it's nighttime when the sun is clearly shining in the sky.

[Author]

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