My Lesbian Wife and our 20 Year Marriage

[RoddyParticipant 40]

Way back in the mid ’90s, I met a hot 22 year old blond, while she rang up my purchase at a local five and dime store.

I flirted with her and she flirted back, so I asked her for her phone number. Two months later we found out that she was pregnant with my child. I was 31 years old at the time and wanted a family, so we got engaged. Prior to the engagement she told me about her history which included dating a few guys before me, but she omitted that fact that her first lover was a woman. And, she omitted the fact that she liked her erogenous zones to be bitten. (A form of sadism.)

She lost the baby, but we got married anyway. I got married because I still wanted to have a family. At the time she told me that she wanted to marry me because she loved me, but 20 years later the truth comes out that she married me because her mother forced her to get married. Her mother’s excuse was that too much money had been spent on the wedding plans to cancel. But, her Christian mother knew that she was a lesbian at heart, and felt that forcing her to marry a man would somehow fix her and keep her right with God.

So for 20 years, my wife hated being married to a man, and she secretly yearned to be with her teenage lesbian lover, who also happen to be the maid of honor at our wedding. Thus she was a bitch from hell and I stayed in the s~~~ty marriage for the sake of the kids.

Earlier this year her secret lesbian loved moved over 2000 miles to our home town. Of course, at the time I just thought it was one of my wife’s old high school friends and did not thing anything was wrong when she first started spending time with her.

But a few months later the cat came out of the bag. My wife and I are now legally separated and a dissolution is pending.

I vow to become MGTOW and to never live with a female again.

[Biggvs_DickvsParticipant 3725]

Take those lemons and make lemonaide – any threesome potential?

/don’t mean to make light of you situation bro, just to lighten the mood. Seriously though – could you get a threesome out of this?

"Data, I would be delighted to offer any advice I can on understanding women. When I have some, I'll let you know." --Captain Picard,

[RoddyParticipant 40]

They both hate men. Threesome not possible, unless third is a woman.

Turns out that wife’s daddy molested both girls for years starting pre-teen years. They both have tremendous animosity towards men. This of course was hidden from me until after I was trapped in a marriage with children.

The silver lining is that I will soon be rid of all women in my life. MGTOW forever!

[Anonymous 1]

Welcome brother.

One word of advice: don’t vow to Mgtow.
In fact, don’t vow to anything. Your life is yours and you own nothing to Mgtow. And vice versa.
If you need place vows, do it to your conscience and to your happiness.
Learn from your experience and let it make you stronger and not weaker, more independent and not dependent.

Anyway, good luck and enjoy the forums.

Cheers.

[HitmanParticipant]

That’s a lot of pain to get through. .being here with men who have survived hardships will help you man..Welcome brother. .This will get easier. .give it time. .

[MENGINEERParticipant 583]

My martial arts instructor went thru this as well. They had two kids and after they divorced she went full lesbian with her HS best friend. 10-12 yr marriage.

The issue that hurt him the most was the long term deception that she hid from him. There is no way for a man to know what a person is hiding from themselves. She was living a lie the entire time at your expense (and future expenses).

Time heals all wounds brother. Understand that she was the deceiver in the relationship. There was nothing you can do but love and support her as a husband. She used this to her advantage and pretended to “love” you for years.

We are here for you brother. Record everything. Take all liquid assets and hide them with a third party that has no relationship with her. Bury it if you have to. Good luck…

[DethklokParticipant 153]

Roddy wrote:

Turns out that wife’s daddy molested both girls for years starting pre-teen years. They both have tremendous animosity towards men.

I came in here to make that claim. Was beaten.

[Governor Megachris%Participant 3584]

Oh mercy me. I could tell you ALL about my previous lesbian girlfriends/near-girlfriends. Well over 50% of the women I’ve dated. It’s been some horrible and hairy dramatic drek that I’d never want to have happen again. I’m just glad I never married any of ’em. The women they leave us for are normally TERRIBLE.

[SkeptiskParticipant 3679]

I find this whole ting to be quite sad, and I hope you’ve overcome whatever effects that has transpired. Good grief! The subject almost sounds like a joke, but with women….

"Expecting to find a decent woman on a dating site is like dumpster diving and expecting to come out with a gourmet meal." Won'tGetFooledAgain

[Truthseeker82Participant 6406]

Welcome and you are amongst friends here who won’t judge you. Women are masters at disguise. What you describe is, unfortunately, not all that surprising. That she led you on for so long is unfortunate. You owe nothing to anyone but yourself. To thy known self be true.

[Symmetric MGTOWParticipant 570]

Man, she stole 20 years of your life with her lies and deceptions… Your pain truly makes me feel sad, brother. But at least you are free now… what you do from here on with your life will mater way more than the time she took away from your life.

Take good care of yourself brother.

[YAZParticipant 140]

My wife of ten years dumped me for the biggest bull dike in her old home town. Never…..never…..have I seen such filthy vile in my life. While it will take some time to recoup my finances, I’m glad to be rid of that cumbersome burden. I was pressured by some of her relatives and some of our mutual friends to step in and be the White knight in shining armor……to save her from a closeted life. A life of alcohol dependency and illicit drugs.

I walked away and went my own way.

All of this happened a little over a year ago, and I found out last month that my ex-whorewife was involuntarily committed to a mental institution.

Nice path, Bitch.

Whore Magnet

[Knights Templar RisingParticipant 5106]

Never, and I repeat NEVER, get involved in a LTR with a female who had an actual “relationship” with another woman. It is one thing if she “experimented” at one point, we all do crazy things when young, but once they have had a “relationship” it is like someone who smoked crack for a year – it PERMANENTLY rewires the chicks’ brains. Trust me on this one, I have had some issues with one woman with it.

Also, never, I repeat NEVER, commit to a woman who has any kind of ongoing BDSM fetish of any type. These women tend to be very psychologically damaged, it will rear it’s ugly head eventually. I used to hang out at a club known for it’s BDSM nights, mostly nutjobs.

I have been with both type of women, in LTR’s. These two types of women are to be interacted with in one way: Sportf*cking. Nothing more than a toy, for your short term enjoyment. As the saying goes: “Fun on a Saturday night, not so much on a Sunday morning!”. Buyer beware…

Sovereignty above all else.

[Anonymous 18]

Man sorry to hear that. That was quite selfish of her. I hope you have some good memories of the 20 years with her.

Roddy wrote:

They both hate men. Threesome not possible, unless third is a woman.
Turns out that wife’s daddy molested both girls for years starting pre-teen years. They both have tremendous animosity towards men. This of course was hidden from me until after I was trapped in a marriage with children.
The silver lining is that I will soon be rid of all women in my life. MGTOW forever!

That arises the premise of homosexuality partly, if not to greater extent, a consequence of sexual abuse.

Where are they choir boys for a double-blinded cohort study?

[Krab_AssParticipant 267]

Yeah – I get that a lot too (the three some comment). You see, I too went through the same thing as you did Roddy. Frankly, I get tired of the guys asking me that. When it happens to YOU it isn’t funny.

Anyway – I digress…. Roddy – I feel your pain man. There IS healing with time. As you and I have both learned, women aren’t all that they seem.

Damn – I would love to meet just one woman that was truly only into men (and faithful). ……..Sorry ’bout that….. had to SHAKE myself back to reality!

"I care not what others think of what I do, but I care very much about what I think of what I do! That is character!"
~ Theodore Roosevelt

[Krab_AssParticipant 267]

You bring up an intersting point. As I mentioned in a different post, I have experienced the same thing as Roddy. You think you know a person (after many years of marrige) and then WHAM!!!
My personal view is – people are ‘wired’ a certain way at birth. Me – I was wired to find women sexy and attractive. Some women are wired the same way and either suppress it or do a damn good job of hiding it so they can be married to a man and have sex with a woman.
Why be married to a man if you are a lesbian? Well, the way I figure it – to get a chunk of his paycheck, benefits and (here is the biggie) – to give society the notion that you are a straight woman. This is important if you have a job that shuns gays.

Some people will justify just about anything in order to get what they want, and the people that they destroy along the way is simply ‘colatteral damage’.

As far as your point of having the fact of her being molested to get more sympathy points (and have that explain why she is gay)…… hmmmmm…. yes, I too have heard that before….. seems to be a common thread with the ‘thought I was straight so I married but now I am thinking I am gay’ women…..
For that I say – those folks will usually pull any kind of ‘sympathy thread’ they can to direct the attention thier way and have people feel sorry for them (rather than just deal with adversity like the rest of the world).

I also get tired of hearing the ‘well….. I was molested as a child so that is why I molest….’ BULLS~~~!! BULLS~~~!!
That is like me saying – ‘well…. I was beat up at school by bullies so now I go around and beat up other kids.’
Give me a F~~~ING BREAK! Quit trying to find reasons to hurt other people because your life is s~~~ty and try…just once…. to break the cycle of abuse.

(sorry for that. I feel better now.)

"I care not what others think of what I do, but I care very much about what I think of what I do! That is character!"
~ Theodore Roosevelt

[Author]

Posts