My First Wife.

[AstroParticipant 2045]

I have talked to you about my second wife but I will give her credit, things could have been worse. Let me tell you about my first wife:

She drilled holes in the bathroom door to see if I was masturbating in the tub. She went to jail every other week due to not being able to handle her booze, even while pregnant with my son. When a former boyfriend dumped her, she poured gasoline under his door and set it on fire. She smashed my car window and I had to get an order of protection against her. She f~~~ed out on me 9 times, once on our living room floor. When my mom died, she slapped her in the coffin and called her a bitch. I did nothing until she kept calling my dead mother a bitch in the car. I lost it and beat the crap out of her till she begged for mercy! That is when I said to hell with being a “Gentleman”! “Never hit a woman?” I will never hit a lady but I will beat a bitch if I have to!

I had written more than a thousand songs all my life and played guitars. My music spanned from folk-rock ballads to heavy metal. Much of it was about relationships all my life. I later wrote Christian music for the church and became the music minister. My 1st wife went to “Sister Busy-Body” over my songs about girlfriends I had written decades ago. I was called down by the pastor for committing “Spiritual Adultery” and was asked to step down from the music ministry. My first wife had no idea my music was my heart when she forced me to destroy it. Within two years, I left the church, Christianity and my wife and I divorced. I have had a writers block since 1996 and am just now starting to come out of it.

I already told you about my second wife and our split around last Christmas. I guess I just couldn’t get it through my head and had to marry again. I could have just as well posted this in “Blue Pill Hell” because that is where Blue Pill thinking takes you. Nice guys finish last, they get stuck with a bipolar maniac who slashes up her own arms. So when I took the red pill and an oath to never go back, I meant it. NO MORE!

[Anonymous 5]

WTF!! Slapping your dead mother(may she rest in peace)? If this ain’t evil, than nothing else is.

I wish I was there, I’ll probably be serving 15+ years.

Disrespecting a dead person is beyond f~~~ed up.

Glad you gave her a ass whopping. And glad you got out of there alive.

[AstroParticipant 2045]

I’m telling ya dude, I really know how to pick em. I didn’t even mean to kick her ass, I just lost all control. Call me a liberal but I think there is such a thing as “Temporary Insanity” and it should be justifiable in court.

[Anonymous 5]

Astro wrote:

I’m telling ya dude, I really know how to pick em. I didn’t even mean to kick her ass, I just lost all control. Call me a liberal but I think there is such a thing as “Temporary Insanity” and it should be justifiable in court.

Remember, AWALT. It’s not you, but them.

[Faust For ScienceParticipant 22522]

Occasionally, when a man talks about his first divorce, he refers to his first ex-wife with as much exuberance as his first hemorrhoid. The key here being not to have another one.

[Anonymous 42]

Can you go a little more into detail about beating the s~~~ out of her? Dems da parts I LIKE!

[AttonParticipant]

She belongs in jail, like for life.

A MGTOW is a man who is not a woman's bitch!

[joetechParticipant]

When I read stories like this it almost puts a halo over the head of both my ex-wives (almost), but then there’s the girlfriend from hell that I recently ran from. Then I realize I’m in good company and have certainly earned a place in heaven…I’ve already lived through hell.

"Don't follow in my footsteps...I stepped in something."

[AstroParticipant 2045]

Karma came around as it usually does to the point that one feels pity, Karma truly is a bitch. After we divorced, she was diagnosed with HIV (I had myself tested and tested again, was clean and that was 20 years ago). The words may vary but Karma is a belief shared by nearly all faiths. While Karma is not foolproof, it usually happens at least in the negative aspect. One creates ones own hell on earth when one creates a hell on earth for others. That is why the world is going down the crapper. We have lost our compass for morality and that even goes for those who attend churches and other religious institutions. Modern civilization is destroying itself with its own Karma.

[KeymasterKeymaster]

Astro wrote:

I’m telling ya dude, I really know how to pick em

MOBB is right. It’s not you, it’s THEM. It’s only “you” when you consider how you can even allow yourself to associate with anyone who demonstrates ANYTHING below warm, kind, and loving behavior.

DO NOT get involved with ANY woman who is anything below loving and kind. DO NOT even associate with ANY woman who is anything below civil.

You see as a much as a fragment of bitchface?
She glances at her phone in mid-sentence?
You smile a knowing smile, and turn and walk.
Don’t even excuse yourself.

It’s got nothing to do with the way you pick em.
It’s got everything to do with when you walk away.

You don’t even need to look for reasons to walk. SHE needs to make you want to stay. Otherwise you have better s~~~ to do and better people to know.

I don’t mean to lecture you with do’s and don’ts except to just draw a necessary line clearly – in every man’s best interest. This kind of thing is unfathomable to me, and I could even tolerate 2% of it. She should’t even be at the funeral.

If you keep doing what you've always done... you're gonna keep getting what you always got.

[AttonParticipant]

Astro wrote:

Karma came around as it usually does to the point that one feels pity, Karma truly is a bitch. After we divorced, she was diagnosed with HIV (I had myself tested and tested again, was clean and that was 20 years ago). The words may vary but Karma is a belief shared by nearly all faiths. While Karma is not foolproof, it usually happens at least in the negative aspect. One creates ones own hell on earth when one creates a hell on earth for others. That is why the world is going down the crapper. We have lost our compass for morality and that even goes for those who attend churches and other religious institutions. Modern civilization is destroying itself with its own Karma.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=msE3WnTPJxQ

A MGTOW is a man who is not a woman's bitch!

[LionOnTheLooseParticipant 1315]

Astro wrote:

She drilled holes in the bathroom door to see if I was masturbating in the tub.

This has both horrified me and cracked me up all day. Absolute classic. I can only wonder: did she do her drilling while you were in there, or beforehand in anticipation of your imagined bathtime infidelities? And how many holes? How big? I’m picturing the door looking like a Swiss cheese as her jealousy grew.

Seriously, though, slapping your mother in the coffin is one of the most shocking things I’ve heard. How can these people be so completely devoid of any respect? NO MORE INDEED!

There aren't holes in your pockets. It's called marriage.

[AstroParticipant 2045]

I think it was about an inch.

[Anonymous 12]

Woah man!!!

Sparky how about you take a summer night off and type down your Relationship with your first wife in a 5 page Essay.
As sick as this sounds, it could be an eye opener for the youth, and a relief for yourself.
also encourage others to do the same.

… and satisfy my sick sense of humor…

[PrincekieParticipant 1042]

Anonymous wrote:

Woah man!!!

Sparky how about you take a summer night off and type down your Relationship with your first wife in a 5 page Essay.
As sick as this sounds, it could be an eye opener for the youth, and a relief for yourself.
also encourage others to do the same.

… and satisfy my sick sense of humor…

It’s helped me, that’s for sure. My ex was crazier than a box of frogs. She never drilled holes in the bathroom door though…

[XSDBSParticipant 3598]

Astro wrote:

She drilled holes in the bathroom door to see if I was masturbating in the tub.

Last year, a co-worker told me that his wife took the bathroom door off the hinges “in case she needed to get something while he was in the shower.”
I told him “Bulls~~~, she wants to catch you jerking off in the shower.”
Several weeks later, he acknowledged; “You were right…”

I had an ex-girlfriend that “caught” me doing the same.
She tried to act all shocked/offended, I said “Are you going to let me finish, or are you going to finish me?”
She climbed in and finished me.
(only worked that one time, by the way…)

[Author]

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