When I was young, I never went through the cootie phase, and never was taught to teach girls any different than boys, I was quiet and awkward, but equal when playing tag or whatnot. As social interactions became more complicated, and everyone was learning sarcasm, I had no one to learn it from. As such, I lagged behind in my communication skills.
As I approached 6th grade, I began flirting but was overcome with my lack of social skills that I would just smile and stammer, and overall not be effective at talking to the opposite sex. This relegated me early on to a youth of beta-ness. However, one girl asked me out, and I said no, because I really didn’t know her, and wasn’t really attracted to her. I fail to understand what was going through her mind, but something must have broke. She had found out that I went to the library after school every day, and went crying to my principal, she had reported that I had sexually assaulted her, and that she was scared because of it. Remember, this is the 6th grade, I was 11 F~~~ING YEARS OLD!
So, what happens if you take a beta, and force him to the back of the line, oppress him in school, and overall, make his existence a living hell. I grew a tough skin and receded from the eyes of everyone, I still had crushes, but I never talked to them.
When I turned 17, I was tired of the area that I lived, and called a recruiter, I received my GED certificate, and as of April 2007, against everyones preconceptions, I joined the Army National Guard. Soon after getting my military job, I volunteered for a deployment, came back home, and moved from my hometown. I met a girl through a friend that I had a fancy for, she was young, had curves in the best way possible, and was inked up. We hit it off well, I decided to engage her, and then was sent on my second deployment. since I was in a relationship, and she had needs, I would send her money for rent, and anything else she had wanted, I put her before me, and made sure she was happy. Fast foreward to post deployment. I’m not making as much as I was overseas, but we both have a nice apartment, fast internet, and are in a good area. She starts disappearing here and there, then disappears for a couple nights, I was a trusting man, we were young, and she had some old friends who partied a lot, her dad was paying for her tuition, and she wanted to have more fun than I was able to afford. The red flags started popping off when she disappeared for four days in a row, and flat out didn’t talk to me. When I finally reached her, I told her that I was going to go to my grandmothers for the 4th of july. She was alright with it, so I loaded myself on my ’79 Yamaha, and rode two states over to Michigan.
When I returned, I stopped at the VFW to hang with some friends, and we all had a glorious night. I passed out when I hit the bed. I woke up to a sunny morning, and a wallet on the nightstand, I open it up, and what do I see. The military ID of a guy that I went overseas with, I also see a camera, in the camera, there are a few pictures of her slutting away on his dick, in my bed.That was a dark 3 years, and in that time, I had fixed my life, and moved on to my current girlfriend, except now I f~~~ed up again. Long story short, she lied about birth control, and now asks about marriage. F~~~ NO! I want to be as free as I can be, and as of tonight, will be looking into getting a vasectomy, because I don’t feel like more kids are going to make me feel complete.
These are the experiences that pushed me into enjoying my solitude, and working for my own benefit, these are the reasons that I am no longer a nice guy, and ultimately, the reasons that MGTOW screams to me. It’s like when you’re solving an extremely tough riddle, and you figure it out, that is how I felt when the epiphany struck.So thank you guys, I had to get that off of my chest…
Keymaster 5 years ago.
