My Christmas gift to you fathers

[Anonymous 5]

Hello Brothers
If you have read any of my posts from before you would know that I have two children and have been married twice in my life. The first marriage was where i had my son and my daughter. They were excised out of my life completely for 19 years, and then out of the blue I got a text from my daughter. I know you all can imagine how high I jumped and hit the ceiling in that moment.
Well heres the dirt. The ex after all her efforts to keep me out of my childrens lives, did whatever she felt she wanted and in the words of my daughter ” was absent for the rest of that time”. My daughter said that she litterally “threw temper tantrums , screamed and cried to be with her daddy” but her mother wouldnt let her. And throughout the years she had never stopped loving her daddy, and also that, everything her mother told her about me “it just didnt fit what she knew.”
And also every time my daughter would say how she felt about me her mother and grandmother would berate her and punish her for her feelings. She told me that one time her mother locked her in her bedroom for 24 hours, no food, no water nothing because on one of these occasions.
So she did what any normal human being would do. She stuffed down her feelings and suffered the loss of her daddy for 19 years.
She also said that when her mother would get the child support checks , her mother would tell her that she got them than go and spend it all on her self. But I had known that this would happen and had been happening the whole time.
I believe in “Karma” and her mother got the mother of all returns on her “Karma” investments. in 2013 her mother had a brain stem stroke. Took to abusing my daughter and son also after nineten years of calling me everything evil under the sun her mother flipped it all around and told my daughter that “your dad was never a bad man, he was and is very good”.
And as I anticipated many years ago what would happen has happened. My daughter is p~~~ed off to know end with her and rightfully so. My daughter has always had a big heart, although a pistol, a good pistol :). Now she is dealling with the hatred she has for her mother.
I have used in this forum many descriptive expletives and harsh words towards her mother and the above is the exact reasons why. No matter what happened between her mother and I our children shouldve never had to endure what they have with her words and more than likely her hands.
It has now come full circle. And I am happy that my daughter has reached out and is now an integral part of my life.
So what am I trying to say, well maybe Iam trying to say to those fathers who have children and you know that the situation you are coming out of, weather it be because of infidelity, or abuses to you, or you didnt want to have your kids hearing horrible things about you durring an argument with their mother. Dont despair, if you have shown your children love, if you have stood up for them, and if you have not abused them in any way then they will come to you. They need you just as my daughter and son need me even in my older age. They need your wisdom, your playfulness, your ability to unconditionally love them as their “Daddy’s”. And that never goes away.
And for you young guys who do not have any children yet, I do not blame you for not wanting children with this Misandric society we live in. I hope and pray that the “reset” will come soon so you can become great Dads one day. But for those who already have children, its a stupid phrase to use but I now use it all the time lol, “You cannot put those children back from whence they have come”, so love them, even when it seems impossible because of your circumstances. Support them, and keep records of that support, the best way you can, trust me when I say this, that may not mean anything to the mother and she may use the funds for her own whims. But to your children it says alot more than just piles of money thrown at them.
And just one more thing Dads I know how hard it is to have children and not being able to see them, hug them, love on them the way you want to. I know the deep pain of the empty space in your life, heart, not having them around, I have suffered that excruciating pain for a very long ass time. But please take heart knowing that they love you, they need you and you need them. As soon as they figure this out, and I am not talking about financial aid Dads, you will have them in your life.
More importantly if you can be in their lives long enough so that they know you, and that you have given and shown them that you love, and have loved them, they will come running to you. Especially if mom has been an outright biatch. I left my daughters mother when she was 4. That was enough time for her to know me, to know that I loved her, that I would standup for and protect her, and I did against her mothers abuses, and she remembered that.
If they have suffered under the types of abuses mine did, expect that they might be stand offish at first because they have had years of indoctrination under their mother . But most importantly love them. And if you have the ability to communicate with them in any way , please communicate your love for and to them in whatever ways you can. I wasnt allowed to contact my children at all. I was purposefully cut out of their lives.
I understand the pressures us men face going through divorces and the pain associated with it only all to well, but Men if you have children dont do anything that would deprive your children of YOU !!!!! Ever. You are more important than you know especially to those little ones who look up to you, the little ones who have known you and who love and need you. You fill a very unique and special place in their lives that only a Daddy can fill. And if you are not here , who is going to fill your unique shoes.
Nobody on this planet is going to be able to fill them , nobody on this planet is going to be able to love them like you do, nobody is going to be their Daddy, a space only you can fill. We often think that our children dont want us or need us if they are with their mothers. I know I did, I thought like alot of fathers that their mother wouldnt be bad to them especially since it seemed that I was the one her mother would take all her anger out on. I was wrong, she went directly to the children and took her lifelong anger and hatred out on them. after she knew that I was no longer a problem for her. Now let me clarify one point her, I am not saying that men should not go their own ways, I am saying that you have every right to go your own way, as I have done, I am not dating, and dont want to. My focus now is on my daughter. And now I get to be the Daddy she has needed all these years, I get to finally show her how to be a “good woman” to and for any man she wants to be with. And I am proud of her , because she is so much like me its not even funny !!!
So men dont give up on yourselves or your children if you have them, be strong , independent, true to yourselves, and enjoy whatever you enjoy doing this Christmas season. And if you have children, take the time to celebrate not only Christmas but life with them.
And if you have children and they are not with you, do something in their honor, like I have done. And whatever you do dont give up on them , they need you and you need them.

A very merry Christmas to all my MGTOW brothers

Sincerely:
Steve

[CarnageParticipant 22113]

Well Steve,
Sorry to bust your bubble, but sooner or later your daughter will turn on you.

There is no helping it, that’s how they are, AWALT.

The best could happen to you is never getting in contact with them ever again.

Maybe I’m wrong but I bet my jimmies on your daughters treason in a few years.

To those following me, be careful, I just farted. Men those beans are killers.

[OldschoolParticipant 2481]

Carnage wrote:

Sorry to bust your bubble, but sooner or later your daughter will turn on you

I couldn’t disagree more.

Get a vasectomy.

[narwhalParticipant]

While not as pessimistic at Carnage, fatherhood should never been looked at it terms of it’s returns. If you’re in it for the appreciation of your children, you’re very likely to be disappointed. It’s great that you got love and appreciation in return, eventually, it is not at a certainty, regardless of interference of their mother.

Will your daughter turn on you? In one way or another, absolutely. It’s no different then the fact that you have surely failed your daughter in one way or another over the years. It’s just life. Betrayal comes with all human interaction. You have to take the bad with the good.

The problem in the system is that government tries take away the negative consequences from women’s actions, placing the consequences on men. I can deal with imperfection and failure in the people associate with. I cannot afford to take the consequences of their actions as my own.

Ok. Then do it.

[Prophet MicahParticipant 1972]

Carnage wrote:

Well Steve,
Sorry to bust your bubble, but sooner or later your daughter will turn on you.

Carnage lol you’re a dick.

Steve, I hope your daughter learned from that bitch of a mothers example she set for her on who not to be.
My heart aches for every man who has their children torn from their arms. EVERY child needs their dad, boy or girl! I see what my brother goes through w/ the 2 of his bitches and that dumb mother f~~~er hasn’t learned his goddamn listen yet! The mother f~~~er went and got engaged *face palm* It’s like he’s a gluten for punishment. All 3 have been California girls and all 3 have “daddy issues.”

No Wife - No Strife

[JVBParticipant]

Carnage wrote:

Well Steve,
Sorry to bust your bubble, but sooner or later your daughter will turn on you.

There is no helping it, that’s how they are, AWALT.

The best could happen to you is never getting in contact with them ever again.

Maybe I’m wrong but I bet my jimmies on your daughters treason in a few years.

Carnage, that’s harsh bro and not necessarily true. Try thinking it through first.

Peace is > piece.

[Secret Agent MGTOWParticipant 22514]

AWALT is true. But you are dismissing the fact that AWALT plays out differently in individual women because of upbringing and their societal and familial restraints.

Women want everything, but want responsibility and accountability for nothing.

[Anonymous 5]

My friend I would hope that in the end my relationship with my daughter would not end up as the one you are describing. Trust me I fear her mother coming out in her, or her maternal grandmother for that matter. My daughter knows that I dont put up with bulls~~~ well from anyone, and the best I can do is my best as her father to and for her in the given amount of time I have left with her. And honesty and clarity, and love, if those are the only things I can give her then it is worth my effort to give those things to her without reservation, even if those truths are bitter pills to swallow, I must offer her those. And if the evidence does not bare out those truths then i have done her an injustice as a person weather daughter or son. I am absolutely sure that throughout our relationship she will find reasons to be angry with me, thats as normal as it gets. And I in turn will get angry with her also. But it is not anger or no anger that determines our relationship. It is mutual respect and trust that deepens the relationship. She is also of age and must make decisions as an adult. As she explained earlier tonight she has visited the school of hard knocks on more than one occasion, but she has explained that it was very difficult and painful for her.
I at one point asked her if i could do research for her on a certain topic , and she said “no”. But I being her Dad did research anyways and presented her with the reasons as to why I did it. A explained my reasonings behind it.
But it was my fear that took over immediately after I sent her the information on my research. The next day she called me. And i asked her what she thought about the research I had done for her, expecting an ass chewing over it, but instead the exact opposite occurred.
Am I afraid of screwing up? Most definately, but should I allow “my” fears to paralyze and dictate to our relationship? Not for one moment will I allow that to happen. To a very deep degree it has been the men of this world who have failed their daughters. Spoiling them at the drop of a hat, caving in to whatever whim their little girls have wanted, and not needed. And as far as her past goes, I know there is no way I can undo the things her mother has said about me that effected our relationship. But I cannot with a good conscience blame my daughter. All of it lays on her mothers shoulders and conscience. So if My daughter turns on me it will not be because I forced her to do so, it will be the voice of her mother. No matter what the cause. Because I as her father must live in reality everyday, in the real world. And I as her father must speak to her in this day as a good guiding father should. But with respect and dignity, and with the love of a father. I have no right to control her in any way shape or form. Only to call attention to anything I might see that I believe to be wrong, and i will do so for as long as i live , because I as her father have that right, and the obligation to do so. If she is not being fair to her man then I am obligated to show her that. If she is being unfaithful with her man then I am obligated to let her know what i see and my disappointment in her because of that. And if i love her then thats what I would and will do. Other wise I am just as complicit in her behavior.
And if she judges me for that then that is her decision to make, and if she wants to live in her “delusional” world then as with anyone who doesnt like what I have to say about things, she is welcome to turn on me.
My friends this is what a “patriarchy” is. This type of teaching is handed down from fathers to our children and if we dont teach them right from wrong, then they will always rule over us men with their “emotions”!
I will be kind, and funny, and loving as her father, but I will remain fair and balanced from the lessons i have been given and ultimately learned from.
Carnage if this has been your experience then who am I to contradict you in anyway shape or form. The vast majority of women out there are indeed as you have said. AWALT !! That has been my experiences as well. But when I was with my daughters mother, i was a blue pill popping fool, and up to 9 years ago I still was swallowing the blue pills by the truckload. It was only after I found MGTOW and other fellas who have experienced the same bulls~~~ that i had. That the red pill became a necessity for my mental healths sake.
And even to this day I must with my every awakened hour, pop the red pill lest I fall back into misery and Misandry. But there is no turning back, and I will not relapse into that relational hell hole ever again.
I thank you Carnage for your insight and care to remind me of what i am dealling with in any human female. 🙂

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