Mom tried to use childhood photos to manipulate me. Was I wrong to say no?

[DayrepSpectator 69]

So basically I met my mom for a day. I ignored her almost completely for the whole day and tried to shut down every conversation I could. She pretended not to notice even though it was so obvious (and I’ve told her I want to stay away from her on many occasions before). Instead, in the evening she took out my childhood albums from an old box or god knows where… and she tried to force me to come and see them. I had to say no almost 15 times!

 

Now I feel guilty.

[UKMgtowParticipant 15]

Emotional blackmail is a typical and commonly used form of female to male manipulation, playing on the social expectation to be a ‘good man’ ‘good husband’ or in your case ‘good son’. If she’s done something to you that makes you wish to no longer have her as part of your life then an old photograph shouldn’t change that. People, relationships and situations change; don’t let it get to you 🙂

[Anonymous 14]

My mother tries something similar. She keeps telling me of my cousins and their happily married lives so that I may finally swallow the Blue pill and get married. I response by telling her that if she is so eager to have a daughter-in-law she might as well get married herself, have another son then ask him to get married. Problem is, she is nearing 70. I’m sure she gets the point. 😉

[Anonymous 42]

Don’t let anybody tell you what you “ARE” or who you “SHOULD BE”. NOT EVER! Not even in the slightest way. Every time you let anybody sway your will; you become their will, their wants, and their ways. And when they’re all done with you, and it didn’t work out; “you” and “you alone” suffer the consequence. I’ve watched countless MANGINA suck ass, then complain about their s~~~ lips, and how much they hated it; yea f~~~ing right, they go right back to kissing the same ass the same way. I have NO mangina friends!

[Anonymous 0]

After three times no you shuold have said No Means No, maybe she did understand that…hehe.

Now I feel guilty

For what?  Your refusing behavioral has a reason…SHE.
She has to accept it and She should feel guilty.

CHEERS!!!

[BrainPilotParticipant 7640]

Many women see men as useful tools to get things done that women do not/cannot do for themselves. These women usually feel that men owe them a relationship. Often they see sons the same way. As an independent man, I DO NOT OWE a relationship to anyone. I am free to end a relationship for any reason I choose, or for no reason at all. If I choose to state a reason, then ‘because I FEEL like it’ is the only reason I need. I heard somewhere that all healthy relationships are voluntary, and must be mutually beneficial to be expected to continue. I agree with that.

I do not owe, and I’m not obligated to volunteer for a relationship not beneficial to me. My mother needed to hear that message, and she had it delivered to her. She disagreed for a time, and during that time of many years, she did not have a relationship with me. Like any other woman, she first tried to manipulate/force me to have a relationship with her. When that didn’t work, she got mad. That didn’t work either.

I got a lot of practice saying ‘no’ with my mother. After she had tried every other thing she could think of without success, she eventually came around to trying respect. We have a relationship now, but it is very different. The main difference is that she knows it’s voluntary and can end anytime, and behaves accordingly now.

I think that a man’s own mother can be the most difficult of all women to say ‘no’ to. Which is why I also think that if you have a mother that is manipulative and feels entitled to use you for things, that she is the best of all possible people to practice saying ‘no’ to. Once a man is proficient at saying ‘no’ to his mother, saying ‘no’ to the rest of the women out there is a cakewalk by comparison…

Look, it's not my fault that tornado dropped a house on your sister. Now get back on your broom and get your ass out of here... and take your monkeys with you

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