MGHOW. New life. F~~~ yes.

[3DomParticipant 35]

I need to get this off my chest.

Background
After the end of a relatively short-term marriage in my early 20’s, I discovered PUA.

I enjoyed PUA and discovering the red-pill world. I had relatively good success and enjoyed seeing things differently. PUA allowed me to attract much higher quality partners and I subsequently entered into two successive 1 year relationships.

However, in each relationship, something did not feel right.

Firstly, I discovered that both partners were lying to me about their past. They both had cheated on their previous partners and both claimed that their previous partners were unstable. They both used lies and false sympathy to keep me around.

Secondly, both wanted the same thing. The same thing that society projects as being a “success”. A house in a great area, kids and a middle class existance.

I felt like this put alot of pressure on me as the price that one pays for this existance is high. It requires extreme financial stability (a high paid, high stress job) and allows no real flexibility for change or discovery. In addition, it requires stability in a rapidly changing market.

I knew deep down in my heart that I could not (and did not want to) pay the price for this type of life. It seemed to steal one’s creativity and life force.

I decided to leave the second relatonship and let the girl find her middle-class man. I recently saw her profile on a hookup app, so good luck with that.

At first, i was convinced that I could just jump back into PUA again and attraction would be like before.

This time, however, my experience was rough, and retrospectively I’m quite glad that it was.

My first few dates were horrible. With the exception of initial physical attractionm I had absolutely NO attraction to the person sitting in front of me. They would not let me lead the conversation. They would talk about their life, their career and their direction and it all seemed so masculine, which did the opposite of attracting me.

I dated a few girls who were more feminine and I was generally attracted. Unfortunately, I was flaked often and even stood up for the first time in my life.

I then tried online dating apps and soon realised where the problem was coming from. I realised that my energies were being completely and utterly wasted.

I realised that through the use of online dating apps, these girls literally have HUNDREDS of guys that they can have at any hour. No exaggeration.

I would get lots of matches. My replies would be extremely entertaining (and even had me crying in laughter at my own messages), but no matter what approach I took, the girls just seemed generally uninterested.

I realised that, with the introduction of online dating apps, I am effectively competing and spending my time and energy for a girl who is most likely seeing multiple, multiple guys every week and who has almost unlimited options wherever she goes.

I felt a little lost.

I then wondered what my life would be like without a woman. Let’s say that I could never attract a woman again. I new idea this to be false, but I wanted to maintain this idea in my head and play with it a little.

By allowing the contrasting thought to simmer, that no matter what I do, i’ll never have sex again, even if a part of my brain knew it was not true, I started to challenge my decisions and look deeper. I realised that the feminine had been shaping my life for a long time.

I realised that almost every decision that I had made was being shaped by the consideration of how it will affect my chances with women now and in the future.

The reason why I hold back, live like I do, wear what I wear, spend what I spend, act like I act is, in part, based on women and future woman attraction potential. I try to maintain a relatively “good-boy” standing in society because of one day pleasing a woman.

So, after a few months of pondering, in a neutral, introspective way, I said “F~~~ it”, I’m not doing this s~~~ anymore. Let’s go bad-boy.

I first went through a stage of dread and withdrawal, as a women, a partner, can give us somewhat of a “purpose” even if it is on the subconscious level.

Then, after a few days, I felt a sense of peace, excitement and wisdom. It felt like everything was clicking into place.

I felt free for the first time in a long time. I let go.

If I had no chance of ever having a woman, then I could relax and be who I really wanted to be, without fear of societal consequences.

If I simply gave up on the idea of a relationship :

I no longer had to do things that mean nothing to me.

I no longer had to worry about providing a house, materiel possessions, raising kids and keeping everyone in a relative state of security and attraction, while the markets are rapidly changing, creating incredible stress for me, knowing that they could “next” me in a heartbeat based on the market or my inability to foresee a change. I could RELAX.

I no longer had to worry about finding a woman who won’t cheat or who is not riding the c~~~ carousel.

I no longer had to worry about how much money I was making or my relative success to others, only that I was happy with my success.

I no longer had to upgrade my possessions to maintain an illusion of societal value. I could move to a small room and save all of my cash, invest and travel. My passion was never to spend all of my earnings on a house anyway.

I no longer had to think about the suburban lifestyle of comparison, judgement, blandness, boredom and fear.

I could slow down and take my time to enjoy this experience of life, without comparatively worrying about how much I had accumulated by a certain age.

I could travel.

I could SAVE my hard earned cash and invest.

I could dedicate my life to sports again. Bodybuilding. Freediving. Night running.

I could go minimal, getting rid of EVERYTHING that means nothing to me.

So, what’s the price for this decision.

I listed my thoughts and responses below:

1Societal rejection

Response – Most people are just weak, afraid to be different, living a life of hidden desperatation. Strength is required.

2That look of “you’re nothing” from others or from girls.

Repsonse – they wouldn’t like me EVEN if I did what they expect. I was doing what they expected, and although this prevented me from receiving that look of disgust, I felt untrue to myself conforming to these sheeples.

3“What will you do when you’re OLD and in bad health, you will be alone”
Repsonse – I refuse to live an unhappy life in some retirement home watching sit-coms.

If a crippling disease takes my body or extreme old age, i will lovingly thank my body for the beautiful beautiful experience, and, in the most respectful way possible, end it.

I would have lived and loved this earth to my heart’s extent.

Prolonging suffering to the misery of me and others is not in line with my values. I will not sacrifice my vitality and health to apease some distant, unappealing sad future.

I now feel excitement again. I feel at one with nature again. I feel free again.

The values of society never resonated with my desires as a man.

I am free. I am MGHOW.

[Jan SobieskiParticipant 28791]

Welcome home brother.

Love is just alimony waiting to happen. Visit mgtow.com.

[VectorParticipant 178]

Dude, I just got out of a long term relationship of 4 years…almost married but pulled the plug right before hand. I now live alone, renting, saved the money I would have spent on a marriage, honeymoon, house, and future slavery. Chicks are flakes. I can’t even tell you how many online dating #’s I got and they all flake flake flake. I’m just worrying about myself now. Full time job and appreciate my liberating alone time to focus on my hobbies. Do I wish I had a f~~~ buddy? Absolutely. But until that time comes, I’m just focused on me. No marriage, no kids, no long term relationships.

[KeymasterKeymaster]

3Dom wrote:

Really needed to externalise my thoughts. Thanks

That’s what the forums are for. Thank you and welcome.

3Dom wrote:

I enjoyed PUA and discovering the red-pill world
MGHOW. New life. F~~~ yes.

It may surprise you, it’s not unusual for “PUA” to be a brief stop on the road to MGTOW.
I even knew a hardcore former PUA (personally) who would agree.

There are also SOME perks to being “game aware“. Not necessarily to put in practice but for the purpose of knowledge and understanding.

It starts to taste a little off when PUAs use terms like “success with women”… because a MGHOW knows “success with women” actually pays better when you “successfully” avoid the WRONG one.

I also don’t hold with “approaching women” and “working on your approaches”. That always sounded silly to me. Why don’t PUAs ever recommend calling her over with your hand? Now women are approaching YOU – if that’s the goal.

You “approach” a lion’s cage.
You “approach” the edge of a cliff.
But she’s just a woman. Not a dentist’s chair.

Arriving at THAT understanding was more profound and important than “working on approaches” because in order to “approach women”…. wouldn’t a man first need a good reason WHY??? A simple sex act and a possible pregnancy – or an STD – isn’t incentive enough.

3Dom wrote:

I first went through a stage of dread and withdrawal, as a women, a partner, can give us somewhat of a “purpose” even if it is on the subconscious level.

Nodding.

A convicted felon also has a “sense of purpose” when he is assigned to punching out license plates.

3Dom wrote:

Then, after a few days, I felt a sense of peace, excitement and wisdom. It felt like everything was clicking into place. I felt free for the first time in a long time. I let go. If I had no chance of ever having a woman, then I could relax and be who I really wanted to be, without fear of societal consequences.

This was exactly the same kind of “AHA” moment I had on some random Tuesday. I couldn’t stop smiling for the whole day – and I couldn’t articulate it to anyone – like I knew the punchline of a joke nobody else would get.

It was a great day.

I had ditched the socially conditioning female-approval seeking mentality – permanently.

If you keep doing what you've always done... you're gonna keep getting what you always got.

[3DomParticipant 35]

Thanks so much for the replies. I can’t describe in words how it feels to have other people understand how I feel and how I see the world.

[black_knightParticipant 2602]

3Dom wrote:

Thanks so much for the replies. I can’t describe in words how it feels to have other people understand how I feel and how I see the world.

That’s funny, because that’s how I felt reading your powerful, well articulated, and deeply wise post. Such resonance and truth. Thank you.

[KeymasterKeymaster]

3Dom wrote:

Thanks so much for the replies. I can’t describe in words how it feels to have other people understand how I feel and how I see the world.

No need. Your post did just as much for a reader and another lurker. Of that you can be certain. I first tripped on MGTOW in the same way, and still have the bump to prove it.

Our member “CAP285” was the first one I read and remember (on another forum). I still salute him for the Manspiration.

If you keep doing what you've always done... you're gonna keep getting what you always got.

[The Batman 2020Participant 2112]

Welcome, and good intro.

Your 20's are for learning, your 30's are for earning.

[Can’t Stump TrumpParticipant]

3Dom wrote:

both claimed that their previous partners were unstable

Uh-oh. If you’re ever in a relationship, and the girl s~~~ talks a previous boyfriend, kick her to the curb right away, because that’s how she’ll be talking about YOU to the next one.

Women are better at multitasking? Fucking up several things at once is not multitasking.

[MACHOParticipant]

Welcome Ghost, Your intro is quite an extensive introspection (no pun intended)

You seem to be ripe for a drastic change of course in your life, Grab a chair and enjoy the forums.

3Dom wrote:

So, after a few months of pondering, in a neutral, introspective way, I said “F~~~ it”, I’m not doing this s~~~ anymore. Let’s go bad-boy.

You must own a better Crystal ball than I

[Anonymous 0]

Welcome home, Ghost
Beer’s in the fridge

[SOLI2DEParticipant 746]

That was an amazing intro. Welcome brother

“Do not give your strength to women, nor your ways to that which destroys kings.” -Proverbs 31:3-

[Mr. ManParticipant 2916]

That was a great introduction. Welcome to the forums.

[TuneoutParticipant]

3Dom wrote:

I felt like this put alot of pressure on me as the price that one pays for this existance is high. It requires extreme financial stability (a high paid, high stress job) and allows no real flexibility for change or discovery. In addition, it requires stability in a rapidly changing market.

All just to make you an accountable debt slave,brother

3Dom wrote:

2That look of “you’re nothing” from others or from girls.

This is actually a good thing brother because by keeping your SMV low in their eyes and playing poor boy,you will be uninteresting to them and they will move on to better prey.

3Dom wrote:

I no longer had to upgrade my possessions to maintain an illusion of societal value. I could move to a small room and save all of my cash, invest and travel. My passion was never to spend all of my earnings on a house anyway.

Exactly,don’t buy into consumerist propaganda and cut the cable while your at it too!

Lifes a bitch,but you don't have to marry one!

[HitmanParticipant]

welcome !

[John Woods 13Participant 2855]

Welcome sir. Great introduction. I am certain your experience will help many members here in the future.

The answer is NO. “I could but I won’t”. Memini murum!

[ShineParticipant 1696]

Epic post, welcome Ghost.

I can relate so much to your intro post.

I was blue pill until my early 30s until a steady series of wake up calls screamed “f~~~ it, I’ve had enough.”

7 years later Im moving towards minimalism, self actualisation, and basically being prepared to take it all on alone.

Flying solo is a great way to pursue your own dreams.

Peace bro.

"Society is to blame" Denton

[Anonymous 1]

Play stupid games, win stupid prizes.

The best way to play the game of women? quit.

Welcome bro.

[AntipathyParticipant 4901]

I enjoyed your intro, very clear and detailed. Thanks for that.

Looks like you finally reached the ultimate conclusion as to what’s best for you, after a journey through the HELL known as dating apps. They are the absolute scum of the earth. I used to notice chicks i knew from school and work would make their profiles public long enough to catch their next victim, dump him, and have their status set to single 3 weeks later, OVER AND OVER.

It really exposed their nature, and how the blue pill men don’t see this, is beyond me. Most these girls must have had 15 or 20 c~~~s in their mouth in a single year. Really opens your eyes as to “what’s out there”.

Welcome aboard brother.

[3DomParticipant 35]

Keymaster wrote:

Dude, I just got out of a long term relationship of 4 years…almost married but pulled the plug right before hand. I now live alone, renting, saved the money I would have spent on a marriage, honeymoon, house, and future slavery. Chicks are flakes. I can’t even tell you how many online dating #’s I got and they all flake flake flake. I’m just worrying about myself now. Full time job and appreciate my liberating alone time to focus on my hobbies. Do I wish I had a f~~~ buddy? Absolutely. But until that time comes, I’m just focused on me. No marriage, no kids, no long term relationships.

Thanks bro

[Author]

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