Married with Children

[kagoshimachrisParticipant 32]

I don’t like talking about myself but maybe it’s good to get things out of your head right? For starters, I’m 39 and as I type this unfortunately married with one daughter. I’ve also got a flurry of stories in my head, as I’m sure everyone does, but I want to get the essence of  my  situation out and I’d  love to hear advice and feedback.

First off, I’m an American living in Japan. My she-beast of a wife is Japanese. Twelve years ago (in Seattle) I proposed to her the only way a modern man can, “You’re what!” Yup knocked her up and thought getting married was the honorable thing to do.  After the daughter was born, she-beast and I talked about moving to her home town and opening an English school. So I sold all of my stuff to finance the move and we moved to Japan. Once she was back though, she completely changed. For starters, she-beast became a total slob–maggots in a towel under the bed kind of slob. If she cooks, it’s instant food. The kicker though is when I tried to talk about it she-beast told me, if I don’t shut up, she’ll divorce me and I’ll never see my daughter again. For eight years she used my daughter as a weapon.

All these years, I’ve tried to give my daughter a somewhat normal childhood. I cooked dinner after work. I’ve kept the house clean. Basically I’ve done my job and she-beast’s job. I’ve endured all her insults and her violence (as well as her mother’s) but I’ve put the time in and now I am a permanent resident and that’s how I came to MGTOW. Being as isolated as I am, there’s lots of time to think and looking back over my life, women have been the cause of every real problem I’ve had. Mom cheated on dad and told me my whole life how bad of a guy he was. He was building the largest cell phone company in Tulsa. He died a few years back of skin cancer and I never really got to know him or share in his wisdom. His wife took everything. When I broke up with my first girlfriend, she screamed at me, “I’m pregnant,” but we had never had sex. One of the band mothers consoled her, “come on Tracey, he’s not worth it.” It’s years and years of women putting in their little knives and I’ve got a million other stories but I think you get the picture.

Going into marriage, I thought it was about commitment and compromise.  My wife makes promise after promise all of which she breaks. She gets angry at me for being angry when she breaks an agreement. I’ve spent many of my productive 30’s cooking and cleaning instead of working because I wanted to see my daughter grow up but I’m treated like an outsider except on payday. I really want out but she-beast is addicted to that pay check she always told me was too small. I’m married for now but I am going to go my way. Anyhoo, that’s the tip of the iceberg and I look forward to getting to know you guys.

Chris

[…Spectator 1165]

Hi Chris. ListenUp! here.

Welcome aboard man. If you click around on the website, you’ll see a wealth of help and info for guys like you.

First things first: Find out what the divorce laws are in both countries. Since you started in the US but are now in Japan, it might be complicated but Google is your friend. Do some research when you feel up to it. Start making logs of everything she’s doing. For me it has always just been simple…email or text myself to keep track of what they are doing. Lazy under the covers bitches never have organized paperwork…they just rely on the hive of other clueless women to guide their lives which is where you as a man have a distinct advantage since you can now start to control your life through logic, reason, and organization to begin freeing yourself from the female draining you of all your resources.

Next, figure out how to start hiding your money. You are going to need a defense fund and woman drain men of their money, they are not contributors except in rare situations.

Third: plan a long term exit strategy for you with your kid’s and your welfare in mind. There are plenty of guys here that are doing this and you’ll find lots of help.

I have spent a lot of time traveling the world and Japan is (or was until recently) a great place. The problem is that usually it doesn’t matter where you are if the people you are with are f~~~ed up and your she-beast obviously is. I’m sorry man! It will be OK!

I gotta dash. Time to put on my tux and go earn my living. It’s New Year’s here in less than six hours. Nice to meet you bro and welcome.

[praxisnodeParticipant -1]

the part where you say “When I broke up with my first girlfriend, she screamed at me, “I’m pregnant,” but we had never had sex.” is this the same chick you married? if thats the case, why you marry her? given the child is not yours, if that is the case. in which i would ask you why would you marry a woman who claim to be pregnant of whom you have not sex with? please clarify this , is this a story ? or what happened to you? here is an interesting real life story that happened to an uncle of mine, he was dating a woman and having sex with her, years before he had an accident on a motorcycle and as a consequence of the accident ( i dont know how) he became sterile and unable to father children. anyways the woman in question at a point claimed to be pregnant with his child. only she did not know this of his at the time, turn out she was pregnant with someone else child and was trying to dump the responsibility on my uncle, obviously he was not having that, medical test proved that, end of that story. getting back to yours please tell me what is what. thank you

[Anonymous 42]

@kagoshimachris, Welcome to MGTOW, sounds like you have a few knots that need cutting, It’s only logical to feel the way you do, the trick is placing your logic over emotions, and running them both through your intellect.

[BrainPilotParticipant 7640]

Welcome to mgtow kagoshima,
‘Sorry we weren’t there to prevent you slide into the pit you are in. But now that you’re here, there are some things here that can be useful for you. First, there are many here who are in, or have passed through situations similar to yours. Knowing you are not alone in your situation, and that you are not at fault for it, is helpful to many. The experiences of those other people who’ve been where you are can give you an idea of things to come, and those things are not all bad. I don’t have kids of my own being used as hostages, so there’s a limit to how useful my experience can be. But I can remind you of the relevance of something you wrote.

That beast has been threatening you for 8 years, and sadly, that threat has been working, as it most often does. They always threaten what you care about most. (I’m a childless doctor. Mine threatened to burn my medical degree). But what the beast doesn’t seem to realize (one of many things) is that the size of the threat she is making diminishes all the time. 8 years ago, she could threaten that you wouldn’t see your daughter for 18 years. But that’s the limit of the threat since an 18 year old person is an adult who can visit with anyone she wants. Today, she can threaten you that you won’t see your daughter for about 10 years. You’re about halfway to the point of explaining to the she-beast that you can see your 18 year old (adult) daughter any damn time you please and telling her to stick that threat up her ass.

Women are so short sighted. You are an American. Your daughter likely has dual citizenship, but as an adult, her prospects for education, marriage etc are probably WAY better as a bilingual American in America than a half American Japanese woman in Japan. I already know where you are going to be in 10 years. I’m about 80% certain where your daughter will want to be in about 10 years. And I am nearly 100% certain where the beast NOT will be in 10 years. Wether you stick it out for 10 more years or not, time is not on the beast’s side.

Women take kids as hostages thinking 18 years is forever. But it isn’t. They think that ransom that finances their existence is forever, but it isn’t either. I’ve known women who called their children’s father the month after the child turned 18 and demanded to know where the hell the child support check was… screaming and making threats to have him jailed if he didn’t pay up… Only to have the father calmly remind them that child support ended when the child turned 18 and stopped being a child…and then hung up on her as she started to panic about not being able to pay bills without the child support check…

They behave as though they think 18 years is forever, but that period after 18 years has come and gone…? THAT IS FOREVER. And that’s where the college tuition, and graduations and the weddings and the grandkids are… And all that stuff takes money… which you are an expert at making, and at which the beast has no back up plan for extorting further.

Because I assume that you will NOT be getting this she-beast pregnant again. Your daughter’s 18 birthday is coming. It’s halfway here now. However fierce the she-beast’s threats are for the moment, time is NOT on her side…

In some places in America, we call this ‘the writing on the wall’… but not everyone can read it. Do not explain this to her or otherwise let her see it coming…

Look, it's not my fault that tornado dropped a house on your sister. Now get back on your broom and get your ass out of here... and take your monkeys with you

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