Male Narcissism and How it Sets Us Up to Be Exploited

[Smacktalk73Participant 296]

Until recently, I had always understood the term “Narcissism” to mean someone who thinks very highly of themselves.  In fact, I was wrong about this.  After going through a hellish relationship, where I was put through the ringer by a woman repeatedly, I have learned something new.  By trying to be “superior” someone very inferior can exploit the hell out of me.

In fact, a certain kind of narcissism is about struggling to maintain the appearance of superiority, while knowing it is to some degree an act.   Narcissism becomes a problem when it comes into a direct clash with inevitable failure, which narcissism is created to protect the narcissist from.

That’s right — males have a tendency to be narcissistic as a coping mechanism for the role society forces us into beginning at a young age.  Males are frequently forced to fend for themselves, even at young ages; denied the ability to experience valid feelings of fear, loneliness, or insecurity.

In response many males develop a narcissistic “mask” they cultivate into the image of perfection that society demands of them.  It can easily turn into a bit of a mental disorder, as males instinctively recoil from any implication of vulnerability, weakness or failure.

It is important to recognize how this can make us vulnerable to exploitation by “crazies.”   Basically, an attractive woman with ABSOLUTELY NOTHING to offer can become a perfect foil for a male who believes he must be strong and perfect.  She sucks him in with her helplessness and vulnerability, and strips him of everything by laying down endless, insurmountable challenges that he, in his frame of mind where he must be strong and perfect, eventually wears himself down to nothing against.

Here is an article describing the experience that I had almost perfectly.  I think being aware of how males are very easy to trap this way is an important thing for males, especially those who want to be self-sufficient and “go their own way” should be aware of.

http://www.sharischreiber.com/dance.html

[Krab_AssParticipant 267]

Interesting.  I have had a similar experience.

"I care not what others think of what I do, but I care very much about what I think of what I do! That is character!"
~ Theodore Roosevelt

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